He looked her straight in the eye and she wanted to melt.
“Well, you’re right—I do like you. That’s why I’m warning you to stay away from me and people like the ones in there.”
“Then why even encourage these parties? Why throw them? How’s that showing you care about anybody?”
Sydney’s attention was diverted by the sound of a door slamming shut. Maria had fully gotten out of the car and was leaning against it with her arms folded.
Nicholas looked over at Maria then averted his eyes.
“Your friend looks like she’s ready to go,” he said.
Sydney waited a few moments, watching him.
“Yeah, I should probably...” She thumbed back in the direction of Maria and the car but didn’t move; she wanted answers. She kept staring up at him.
He stared back but his expression again became unreadable.
He broke eye contact.
“Goodbye Sydney,” he said, turning to walk away.
“Bye Nicholas,” she responded softly.
She turned and reentered the car.
“Weirdo,” she said to Maria as she got in.
Maria looked at her, then ahead, starting the car.
They drove home in silence.
***
When they reached their dorm room, Maria threw her keys down on their desk.
“All right, talk,” she said.
“Are you upset?”
Sydney could see Maria was perturbed, but it looked like something else was on her mind.
“Well, yeah! I saw you getting upset so it upset me all right? What did the bastard say?”
“Something you wouldn’t expect.”
Even in the somber moment, Maria snickered, her serious face dissolving in playfulness.
Then in Darth Vader voice she said:
“Sydney, I am your father.”
Sydney laughed.
“You’re actually not that far off.”
Maria stopped laughing.
“I only said that because of the way he watches you sometimes—like he’s your freakin’ guardian, or like he was hired to protect you or something.”
“Like I said, that’s not too far off.”
Maria’s expression was almost comical in its befuddlement.
“He basically just warned me to stay away from parties, him, guys like him. Said he doesn’t want to see me get hurt.”
“Okay, how...?”
“I don’t know Maria. But he suggested that he was aware of some girls who had gotten taken advantage of in those situations.”
Maria looked lost in solemn thought for a few moments.
She finally said:
“Do you think he knows about Sarah? About who did it?”
It seemed a strange thing to ask all of a sudden.
“Maria come on. He didn’t even go to our high school.”
“Yeah but I’m sure the news reached even Deer Valley. I mean, they’re from our state—he must’ve known about it. It was a huge state story, had all the sexy news details: young, pretty blond found naked and all that.”
Sydney thought about it for a second, then shook her head.
“No way. That’s too farfetched.”
“No, it’s not Sydney. Consider the kind of people he knows. Then consider the fact that the guy who did it was probably from our area. Chances are, he knows the guy. Don’t you think?”
Sydney didn’t want to think about it.
“But even if he knows him, do you think he knows he was behind it?”
Maria shrugged her shoulders while looking directly at Sydney, her shrugging saying one thing, her eyes saying another.
“Maria I don’t even want to go there—who could keep something like that a secret?”
Maria looked sideways.
CHAPTER FOUR
Nicholas pushed away thoughts of Sydney as he reentered the party.
Although he succeeded in not thinking about their most recent conversation, his mind drifted back to their encounter the previous day—and the dream he had last night.
He had gone to sleep smiling, thinking about the library events: him, trying not to make it obvious he was examining her once he noticed there was something different about her, then realizing it was her hair—straightened.
He had grinned to himself when he saw her get frustrated by her hair’s movements then pull it back into a ponytail—it seemed so typical of her. He had even started wondering why she didn’t wear her hair down more often—it was incredibly attractive. Then he realized that was probably why she didn’t do it; after all, she had worn it out once and gotten some stares—massive curly hair like that was hard to ignore. She had been good at hiding herself, but that was the day she ended up on his radar.
He also remembered the sound of her voice as she spoke to him for the first time and what she had said. It wasn’t a profession of love by any means, but it made his heart sing nonetheless.
It was a bittersweet moment since he was happy to have her approach him, and even happier that it seemed to be her innocent way of flirting but at the same time, it saddened him because he knew he had to stay away from her.
The dream he had later that night reminded him why.
In the morning, as the dream fragments started slowly drifting away from him, he grabbed at some of the pieces, trying to retain the detail:
“...and Sydney Johnson,”
a familiar voice had said, as if reading from a list.
He didn’t see the face of the person who had said it, and was unable to place the voice immediately so he abandoned any attempt to recall the speaker, knowing it would come to him in time. For now, he had to hold on to the other pieces...
Sydney’s muffled voice.
He knew for sure it was her, although he could not see her face either. But he saw the familiar curly hair.
He couldn’t hear what she was saying but he got the impression that it wasn’t her choice. She was protesting, he was sure of it.
Something bad was going to happen to her, and it seemed he was a part of it somehow.
His thoughts and memories were like insects crawling over him, and he tried to shake them off to return his attention to the party.
He got a welcome distraction as a guy who looked vaguely familiar headed his way.
He turned to him, glad for the company.
“Hey Nicholas! How’s it going man?” the guy said, green eyes shining, and somewhat sleepy-looking with alcohol.
Nicholas smiled a stalling smile in greeting, combing his brain for the guy’s name.
“Hey Mark, what’s up?” he said after a few seconds, hoping he was correct.
“I’m all right, thanks for asking,” Mark said, not disputing the name.
Mark paused for a few moments, as if rethinking what he was going to say.
“Hey, you know my brother Mike? Well, he’s looking into a job at Dhalton Industries and he was wondering if...”
Nicholas felt his smile fading as the rest of Mark’s words blurred in his head.
He should have expected this.
“Yeah sure, I’ll see what I can do,” he said when Mark stopped talking.
“Thanks man,” Mark said, patting his back and smiling as if Nicholas had just shared a stock tip. “I’ll see you around. And hey—great party!”
Nicholas nodded, forcing his facial muscles to form a smile once more as Mark winked then headed to a girl playing air guitar as she shook her head to the music who looked like she had finished off a keg all by herself.
Then he looked around the room, surveying the rest of the glowing faces. Everyone looked so happy—dancing, drinking, socializing; having a great time at his expense—but to his delight. They showed up faithfully every month at the parties and he looked forward to seeing them. They smiled when they saw him, thanked him for showing them a good time. He knew they didn’t really care for him, that they only liked using him, that they tried to get money, status, sex from him, but he didn’t care. He was okay with the symbiotic relationship.
Still, he didn’t like being reminded directly this was all he was to them as Mark had done. As much as he tried to fight it and pretend he was okay with his role, he couldn’t fool himself; he wanted to be more to somebody.
He thought of Sydney, and his warning to her.
He knew some of the things that went down at the parties, things he wished he didn’t know, but he was so inflated with the gratitude and kudos he received for throwing the festivities that he forced himself to think only of the joy he was helping spread. He pretended people came to laugh, dance, drink a little, have fun without hurting anyone in the process. He knew if he acknowledged the other side he would have to shut the parties down. He rationalized that if he stopped, he wouldn’t be stopping anyone at all—they would just go to someone else’s. Then where would he get the admiration he craved?
Nicholas was so lost in his thought that he didn’t see Eddie in time to avoid him.
“What’s with you and that girl man?” Eddie asked, curiosity etching his face. “And dude, I was so wrong. She is steaming hot!” Eddie howled, putting his free hand by his mouth like a megaphone, his other hand occupied by a glass of white wine.
“Who, Sydney?”
Nicholas folded his arms and leaned against the wall, preparing himself for both Eddie’s inquisition and the assault of Sydney-related thoughts again.
Eddie looked at him strangely.
“Of course Sydney. Who else do you drool over? Although I can see now why you like her—you must have known what was underneath the whole time.”
Eddie had a stupid grin on his face as he nudged Nicholas but Nicholas refused to respond.
After a few seconds of giving his brother the silent treatment, Eddie stopped smiling and said: “Well?”
“Well what? What do you want to know?”
Nicholas didn’t feel like talking; his guilt had returned and he was now busy beating himself up again for treating Sydney the way he did, doing exactly what he had planned never to do: hurt her.
“You’re always watching her as if you like her, but you never seemed like you planned to do anything about it—until a few moments ago.”
“You were watching me again?”
“Hey, I’m curious as hell, I’m not gonna lie. It’s like she put some kind of voodoo on you, like you’re under some kind of spell.”
Eddie sipped his drink, but his eyes kept staring at Nicholas intently.
Nicholas thought about Eddie’s words—they seemed so right.
“Yeah, in more ways than one,” Nicholas replied.
“Okay, now what the hell does
that
mean?”
Nicholas sighed.
“I like her man, but I can’t do anything about it. I know if I get involved with her I’ll only bring her pain, and that’s the last thing I want to do.”
Eddie’s eyebrows furrowed as he shook his head.
“You know that’s some weird shit right there, right? I’m just making sure you know that.”
“Why is that weird Eddie? I like the girl. So what?”
Eddie’s chuckle was dry.
“Nicholas, you’re talking about her like you
love
her. Since when do you care about hurting anybody?”
“Since about four years ago man.”
Nicholas looked Eddie straight in the eyes to make his meaning clear.
He saw Eddie’s face slowly transform to sympathy, the kind Nicholas could handle.
Eddie put his hand on Nicholas’s shoulder.
“Hey man. It shook us all up, all right. That monster will pay someday,” he said. “Christ, it could have easily been our sister!” Eddie paused for a few seconds. “Look, I don’t know why you’ve taken to this Sydney girl in particular, but I guess I understand why you feel a bit protective.”
“She called me ‘daddy’ tonight.” Nicholas found himself smiling at the memory. “I was trying to tell her to be careful...”
“Yeah I know how you feel. I feel like stalking her friend too sometimes—poor little thing.”
Eddie grinned.
He had a gleam in his eye Nicholas recognized.
Nicholas grinned back at him, glad Eddie had been distracted from the fact that he still hadn’t answered his main question.
CHAPTER FIVE
Maria couldn’t stop thinking about him.
Yes, he was cute and loaded, but he was exactly the type she didn’t want to get involved with; he was too sure of himself, too aware of his own value. She liked having the upper hand and he would know how to put her in her place.
She found it easy to get her way with other men, but Edward Dhalton, he wouldn’t have it. And that only made him more attractive to her.
Weeks went by, and when the end of October came along, so did the Dhalton Night of the Dead Halloween party. Maria tried to convince Sydney to go with her but Sydney was still miffed about her first experience, so she planned to go by herself as usual.
Maria picked out her costume carefully, one that no straight, red-blooded man could resist, and on the night of the party, drove to the Dhalton party house with visions of dancing and Dhaltons in her head.
Once she arrived, she stepped out of her car and walked toward the doorway, her mission clear. She made her entrance, scanned the room, and her eyes finally rested on her target.
Edward had a blond hanging over him—his girlfriend she assumed—and it suddenly hit her that this blond was not the type of girl she expected him to be with. She fit the look, yes: slender, attractive, and appeared to be in the same class level as him. But she did not seem to be on his level in any other way. She was probably boring, un-engaging, Maria decided; therefore, she would be doing him a favor by adding herself to his life.
Maria made her way toward the couple, careful not to be too obvious about her intentions. She passed them, making sure he saw her.
She had no doubt she would catch his eye—with her flat, toned stomach bared, ornamented by a navel ring, and her eyes lined and emphasized by fake eyelashes on her veiled face, she was sure he would be dreaming of her that night.
Maria knew she had his attention when she noticed the blond throwing glances her way, talking to Edward when his eyes started to wander, as if attempting to pull his face back toward hers with her words.
Maria made no move toward him; in fact, moved away from the couple as soon as she could make her way through the tangled vines of the attention of others to exit the house. She fended off those who offered to accompany her and reached the outside, enjoying the cool, night air.
She had taken just a few steps when, just as she expected, out walked Edward.
She did not see him walk out, but she sensed it was him, and his voice confirmed her feeling.
“A little chilly out here isn’t it?” he asked.
She kept her eyes averted and remained silent.
“Your boyfriend should come and put a coat around you; in fact, if I were him, you’d never be out of my sight, especially looking like that.”
Maria felt a chill run through her.
“I’m not even sure I’d let you wear something like that in public,” he added.
Maria couldn’t help but smile.
She turned toward him, deciding to dignify his lame attempt at getting her to state her relationship status.
She looked up at his face.
His smile was irresistible, coaxing her own grin wider.
“I don’t have a boyfriend,” she said, “but I’m sure you already knew that.”
His shoulders lifted then fell gracefully as he maintained his smile.
“What did I say? No man in his right mind would let you travel alone.”
“I detect a hint of chauvinism there, but that’s okay.”
She looked up at him from under her eyelashes and waited a moment before sending
the frisbee back his way.
“So your girlfriend doesn’t mind you leaving her all alone to talk to another girl?”
“Ouch. You got me, you got me.”
He put his hand over his chest and continued to smile at her, never breaking eye contact, not even to blink.
Maria felt her heart sinking and her smile fading as he made no attempt to dispel her notion. But once she noticed the twinkle in his eyes, she knew she had been played.
“Not my girlfriend,” he said, “although she used to be at some point. And wants to be again.” He shrugged. “I guess she thinks I’m some kind of catch or something. Can’t say I blame her.” His grin was irresistible.
Maria wasn’t sure if he was full of himself, or just sure of himself. In any case, she loved it.
“Well, from what I gathered of you so far, seems like she’s got a lot of work to do,” she said.
He nodded his head and stepped closer to her.
“I think you’re right.”
“Look at you,” she managed to say as she stepped back, for he had almost taken her breath away without even touching her.
It was then that she knew she had to keep him at a safe distance for a bit, even though she didn’t want to. He was dangerous, could take and break her heart in an instant.
She turned to leave.
“So I’ll see you around?”
“You bet,” he said, looking at her in expectation.
“Maria,” she said at his silent prompting.
“Maria,” he repeated. “I’m Edward,” he said, tipping an imaginary hat. “Although I suspect you already knew that.”
She laughed, then waved goodbye, making her way back into the party house with intentions to stay clear of him for the rest of the night.
***
As the semester neared to a close, a flyer for one of the end-of-term parties caught Maria’s attention. She was determined to take Sydney with her, especially since it was the December Dhalton party, the last party of the semester. Sydney had not tried another party since the last disaster, forgoing not only the Halloween costume party, but the November Thanksgiving get-together and all the non-Dhalton alcohol fests in-between.
Maria didn’t mind much because she at least got a chance to move forward with Edward, advancing their knowledge of each other with each party. She intended to get even closer to him at this upcoming fête, even while dancing away from him on a different level after realizing she had to keep an emotional distance as long as possible.
She wasn’t sure yet if she wanted to leave Sydney to fend for herself, but she had to dig deeper, cement her claws in Edward Dhalton before he had a chance to get the upper hand and wrap his arms around her.
A few days before the party, Maria caught up to Sydney who was waiting for her outside of the cafeteria for lunch.
“Hey Syd,” she said in greeting, preparing her method of attack.
“Yeah?”
Sydney’s expression looked guarded.
“So the frat boys are having a party this weekend...” Maria began.
“Oh heck no.”
Sydney shook her head vigorously.
“So you’ve heard of it then?”
“Well yeah, I saw something about it, somewhere. I’ve been seeing a lot more than just academic announcements these days—you’d be proud. But we are not going to that party Maria—at least, I’m not.”
Maria grinned.
“I didn’t say we were! But there’s this
other
end-of-term party I think we should go to. Yes, it’s a Dhalton party but so what? I’m tired of going to these things alone.”
She gave Sydney her best puppy face.
“Yeah right,” Sydney said. “I know you don’t need me making you leave early and stuff.”
“And stuff...you sure you’re a Communication major?”
“Comm
and
Psych thank you very much.”
Maria mouthed
blah blah blah
.
“You double major showoffs,” she said. “So anyway, this weekend then? And don’t say one word about finals—you know you’ve got nothing to worry about.”
“Yeah? What about you?”
Maria playfully narrowed her eyes at her.
“Hey all I have to do is make a lamp for one of my finals,” she said, “and that’s the hardest one.”
***
When Saturday evening rolled around, Maria was wiping away fake tears.
“This is my greatest work yet,” she said, spinning Sydney so she could see herself in the mirror.
Sydney smiled from ear to ear.
“Oh my god Maria—even
I
have to admit I look kind of...you know, smoking.”
Maria laughed at Sydney’s choice of words and the hesitant way she said them.
“But isn’t this too over the top?” Sydney continued. “Too suggestive? Too...easy?”
Maria rolled her eyes.
“You’re gonna make my eyes get stuck at the back of my head. Girl shut up! You are sizzling. And the hottest thing about your look is you’re not even showing everything—just enough. Just enough skin, just enough curves...Girl you know I’m taking those pants
after tonight right? And that top, it’s mine bitch.”
Maria admired the shirt she had picked out for Sydney months ago.
“That burgundy looks fantastic on your skin. And your hair and make-up—well of course yours truly did it so it’s nothing less than superb. In fact, you know what?” Maria folded her arms. “I changed my mind about you coming to this party with me. I don’t feel like sharing the attention—or having it ripped cruelly away from me I should say.”
She mock-pouted.
“Oh Maria please. The one that matters to you is all yours, I’m sure. You have absolutely no competition—in me or anyone else...hussy,” Sydney added, pointedly looking at Maria’s short, asymmetrical, figure-hugging silver dress in mock-disgust.
Maria looked down at herself, then studied herself in the mirror and nodded in agreement.
“Yeah, that’s true,” she said. “We are definitely two hot bitches.”
***
Sydney watched as Maria pretended to pluck Edward’s eyeballs out of her bosom.
“Good thing they don’t have x-ray vision,” she said. “The way they’re burning their gazes through us, I bet Edward just saw my ovaries.”
Sydney laughed.
“Oh I know. They’re not even trying to hide it!”
Sydney’s face felt warm but she found herself delighted at the attention. She had never felt beautiful, but Nicholas made her feel like the most captivating thing around. It was strange to her—to have the image she had always had of herself challenged by a stranger in such a convincing way.
“Honestly Sydney, how could they? They can’t help it.”
Sydney shook her head at her friend.
“You’re so vain,” Sydney said.
They grinned at each other.
“So what are we going to do?” Sydney asked.
“Well I don’t know what you’re going to do, but I’m going to talk to Edward.”
“But...!”
Sydney grabbed her arm, not sure what she wanted to say and definitely not wanting to be left standing there like prey.
“But nothing! Sydney, these people don’t bite...well some of them do.”
She winked and pulled herself away, heading for the Dhalton brothers.
“Maria!” Sydney called out uselessly after her friend.
Maria waved without turning around.
As Maria neared the Dhaltons, Nicholas started walking away from his brother and heading toward her.
Once he reached within her space, Sydney said quickly:
“Came to ask what I’m doing here? Why I’m hanging out at a place like this after you explicitly told me not to, daddy?”
He just looked at her.
“No,” he said after a few moments. “I came to tell you you’re the only thing worth looking at in this room. I think you need to hear it, but most of all, I needed to say it.” He paused. “You look gorgeous Sydney.”
Sydney bowed her head, her face growing warm again.
“Thank you,” she said in an almost-whisper. Then she looked up and saw such intensity in his eyes that it sent a shiver crawling through her spine, awaking long-dormant regions in her body, and surprising her into babbling.
“So you’ve decided I’m a big girl then. No spanking for me.”
She began a smile that quickly shrunk in embarrassment as she realized how her words could be taken. But he seemed not to hear her, so unwavering was his gaze. She started to feel uncomfortable under it—it was like he was stripping her down to her essence.
She mustered up the strength to snap her fingers in front of him in order to break the moment.
It worked.
He cleared his throat.
“I still feel the same. But I guess as long as I’m around, I feel better about you being here.”
Sydney paused and considered his statement.
“Okay,” she said in a way that she hoped made it clear she thought him forward at the least. “You know, I’m not sure how to take all of this. I mean, you could be a stalker, a ‘secret’ admirer, or even someone hired to watch me. I don’t know which, but please tell me it’s a less scary option?”
He gave a half-smile.
“I am definitely an admirer,” he said. “I can’t help but notice you, no matter how invisible you try to make yourself most of the time.” He looked at her pointedly.
She looked down.
He laughed.
“I must seem really crazy to you. I’m not, I promise.”
“Crazy people always say that,” she replied, looking back at him.
He smiled.
“You know,” she continued, “I’d be afraid of you and run as far as my legs would take me—if I didn’t feel drawn to you too.” She looked directly into his eyes and found herself getting lost in them. They stared at each other and before she knew it, he had moved closer. Then he suddenly broke the moment, clearing his throat.
She was embarrassed, realizing what they were near doing and where.
She had already amazed herself with her boldness, and now she was frightened by her carelessness, at the power he held in those hazel-green eyes.
She looked down.
“I’m sorry,” she said.
She felt his finger under her chin, lifting her head.
“Don’t apologize,” he said. Then he put his hands behind his back.
Sydney got the impression it was to help him keep his hands off of her.
“I’m the one who should apologize,” he said.
“For what? You didn’t do anything.”
“Yes, I did,” he said, backing away, and with one last sorrowful glance, turned to walk away.
“You’re walking away from me again,” she said, loud enough for him to hear it, but soft enough so that only he heard it.
“I have to,” he replied over his shoulder.
***
Edward welcomed Maria’s interruption.
Nicholas had been whining way too much about Sydney—how beautiful she looked, how hard it would be to stay away from her. It even got to the point where Edward felt uneasy; the urgency in his brother’s voice and the strangeness of his words started creeping him out.