Read Blinded by Grace: Book Five of the Cotillion Ball series (Crimson Romance) Online
Authors: Becky Lower
He woke, groaning, hard and ready to plumb the depths of Grace. Merely thinking about penetrating her, and having her wrapped tightly around his sheath, made his hard shaft swell even more in anticipation. His memories of Grace in the bank, laying out her business proposition to him, and him agreeing to her well-balanced idea of them going through with a sham of a marriage was, as it turned out, only the beginning. Her idea had appealed to him from a business standpoint. He could see the value in approaching marriage as a strategic business decision. So his feelings hadn’t been compromised then. When had this happened?
Perhaps when his memories evaded him for a week or so? He’d had no knowledge of their agreement during that time, and Grace was in his parents’ home, waiting on his every need, as would be expected of a woman about to marry him. Admittedly, Grace was a beautiful young woman, with her porcelain skin and dark as night hair, and she had finally grown into those big blue eyes of hers. She was the type of woman he would have selected on his own—quiet, soft-spoken, well-educated. He could envision long evenings in the library with her, discussing books, poetry, and current events.
So how had this match, well-thought out and sound from a business perspective, morphed into one eminently spicier? His vision of long evenings in the library changed into one where their respective books were tossed aside and they ended up naked and rolling around in front of the fire. In his wildest dreams, he never could have imagined such a scenario. Yet here he was, being woken up by dreams of just such content. Such unbridled passion was not something he had ever experienced, or even thought about, before. Before Grace.
What was the time, anyway? He took his pocket watch out of his vest and flicked the cover open. A scant bit of light from the street pierced the bedroom, and he was able to make out the hands on the watch. Only a little past ten. He must have fallen asleep shortly after his love scene with Grace was so rudely interrupted by the maid. He’d missed dinner completely, and was starving.
He rose from the bed and clumped down the stairs as quietly as he could. Surprised to find a light on in the parlor, he walked toward the room. His mother was sitting there, with her embroidery. Almost as if she were waiting for him. Well, he had some questions for her, too.
“Hello, Mother.” Halwyn’s words were clipped as he came into the room and sat down opposite her.
“I thought you might have trouble sleeping and be down sooner or later. I’ll ring for Cook to heat up your dinner for you.” She rang for a servant to deliver the message to the cook, and then glanced at him, with a smirk on her face. Damn, she had been made aware of the situation with Grace already.
“I see you’ve been informed. But the actual events weren’t what you probably have been led to believe.”
“I have no reason to doubt Helen. She’s been with us for years, and, as the upstairs maid, she is aware of what goes on in one’s bedroom.”
“All right, then. Let’s discuss what Helen believes she walked in on. And how such a situation could possibly have happened in the first place. Your fingers have been in the middle of my relationship with Grace from the outset anyway.”
His mother’s amused expression became a carefully crafted one of innocence. He’d seen it many times before. Maybe his father could be taken in by her behavior, but Halwyn was not.
“How did it happen, Mother?”
“Well, I suppose in the same way it’s been happening for thousands of years. Man meets woman, the pair spend time together, decide they care for each other well enough to spend the rest of their lives together, marry, and have a family.”
Halwyn controlled his desire to growl at her. “Except for the fact we didn’t decide we cared for each other and want to spend the rest of our days together. Of course, I didn’t have that little nugget of information when I came out of my medically-induced fog. You made certain Grace was assigned to take care of me, and you and she led me to believe we were a couple.”
His mother raised an eyebrow. Her trademark expression reinforced the message she was not happy with the tone of what he was saying. She’d used it since he was little, to control a sassy tongue from him and his brothers and sisters. Well, this time a mere eyebrow raise was not going to do the trick. He was angry, and rightfully so.
“How could you have pulled Grace into your web of lies, Mother? Are you at all aware of the torment you put that poor woman through? She’s not accustomed to being duplicitous. But it seems you have no problem with it.”
Her eyes pierced him. She laid aside her needlework and brushed a hand over her hair. “Yes, it was my idea for Grace to be responsible for your care while you were mending. She needed to get away from Simon, you needed a nurse; it seemed only logical. I was only thinking of what was best for both of you. As any mother would. And you, being the proper young man that I raised, would think the situation highly improper unless you believed her to be your betrothed, hand-picked by you. So, if it will make you feel better to blame someone, blame me, not that poor girl. She’s been carrying around enough problems as it is.”
Halwyn’s dinner arrived on a tray, and was set up in front of him. He left the cover on the food for the moment. He needed to finish the conversation.
“So what am I to do now? The servants all have had a great laugh at our expense, and Grace is embarrassed beyond belief.”
“You were behaving as a couple. A couple in love with each other. Where’s the harm? Or the need for embarrassment?”
Halwyn ground his teeth together and raked his fingers through his hair. “Because we are not a couple. It’s that simple. We’re not supposed to be a couple; we’re not supposed to be in love.”
Charlotte stood, and moved in front of him, staring at him intently. She reached down, and straightened out his glasses. “Are you so certain, Halwyn? Sometimes, plans change. And even a pair of spectacles isn’t enough to see what’s directly in front of your face. Goodnight, son.”
He lifted the lid on the meal and stared at it. His appetite had left him completely.
As June drew to a close, Grace stood still in the dress shop as Jasmine and her assistants fluttered about her, pinning the gown. She kept telling herself this wasn’t a real wedding gown, this wasn’t a real wedding, she wasn’t a real bride. Perhaps if she kept telling herself so, she would accept it as fact. She closed her eyes to keep tears from spilling over.
Finally, the pinning was done and Jasmine took a step back to survey the completed dress.
“Just as I thought. The hint of pink in the cream fabric brings some color to your face. You will be a lovely bride, Grace. Want to take a peek?”
Grace opened her eyes. She really didn’t want to stare at herself in the mirror, but she also didn’t want to hurt Jasmine’s feelings. After all, she’d been working hard on this dress for weeks. “Well, of course.” She tried for a smile, but could feel her lips wobble.
Jasmine wrapped her arms around Grace. “Oh, you poor thing. You must be so nervous. But you’ll make a beautiful bride. Halwyn won’t be able to take his eyes off you. Here.” She turned Grace to face the mirror. “See for yourself.”
Unable to resist, Grace raised her eyes and stared at herself. Her breath caught in her throat. She ran her hands lightly down the front of the dress. The bodice of the silk fabric had been embellished with a layer of lace, on which were sewn many little beads which caught the light as she turned. The full, flowing skirt rustled with her movements. She turned to the side in order to catch a glimpse of the slight bustle at the back of the dress, which had been adorned with hand-made roses in a darker shade of pink. Despite herself, Grace began to get excited. She caught Jasmine’s hands with her own.
“The dress is gorgeous, and you’re a genius,” she whispered.
“Halwyn’s a lucky man. And just think, we’ll finally be sisters.”
Grace and Jasmine stared at each other in the mirror for a long moment before Grace turned away. “I always wished we could be sisters when we were younger. You had so much fun with your siblings, and I am an only child. I longed for a large family such as yours. But let’s not fool each other a moment longer. I’m sure your mother has told you by now the true reason for my marriage to Halwyn. I don’t want you to think of me as your sister. It will only make things harder when we divorce.”
“Grace Wagner, you listen to me.” Jasmine stomped her foot to emphasize her point. “My brother’s a nice man, but even he has his limits. He would not have agreed to marry you if he didn’t care for you. When he came here nightly to work on my accounting records, you were all he could talk about. He loves you, even if he hasn’t yet admitted it to you. He probably hasn’t admitted it to himself. But he will. All he needs to do is see you in this gown, and he’ll be itching to get you alone so he can rip it off of you.”
The blush rose to Grace’s cheeks as she visualized the scene Jasmine had put into her head. If only she was able to arouse such passion from her intended. But, except for a few brief occasions, he’d kept his passion in check. And she had no illusions that her life would be any different after the ceremony.
“Yes, well … ” Grace stammered. “The gown is lovely, Jasmine. You’ll certainly have ladies clamoring for you to create their wedding gowns, after seeing this one.” Grace began to undo the pearl buttons of the dress.
Jasmine helped her remove the gown. “I’ll make the final alterations and get the dress hemmed. Then we’ll take the gown out to the Hamptons this weekend for the ceremony.”
Grace swallowed hard as she thought about the upcoming weekend. She’d be a married woman by this time next week. She would have successfully wrestled her inheritance away from the evil Simon. She’d be able to buy a place for her mother to live out her days quietly without being browbeaten daily. Her plan would be complete. So why did it seem a hollow victory?
• • •
The road out of the city to Long Island and the Hamptons was clogged with carriages, as city folks took to the country for the holiday weekend. Halwyn chose to ride out on horseback, since the cast was now off his leg, but Grace was in a hot, cloistered carriage along with Charlotte and George Fitzpatrick and their youngest children, Rosemary, Valerian, and Saffron. Their eldest daughter, and Halwyn’s twin, Pepper, was to join the party at the Hamptons estate along with her husband and their children. Jasmine and Parr would also be along, with Grace’s beautiful wedding gown.
The lovely creamy pink satin certainly made Grace resemble a blushing bride. But since the day they toured Halwyn’s new home, and their intimate behavior afterwards up in his room was interrupted by the upstairs maid, Grace and Halwyn had maintained a careful distance from each other, as was appropriate. In another life, possibly in another few years, she would marry again, to a man who truly did care for her. She blinked back the tears, which threatened to roll down her cheeks.
She wanted the trip to be over. She wanted the weekend to be over. She wanted her sham of a marriage to be over. Her stomach quivered at the thought of facing Simon and her mother for the first time since the weekend Halwyn broke his leg. She hoped Simon didn’t have any other mayhem planned, and the weekend would go off seamlessly.
Just let me get through the wedding unscathed. Me and everyone else.
She’d never be able to live with herself if some innocent person was again made a victim because of her.
“Can’t we open a window?” Saffron, the youngest Fitzpatrick, mirrored Grace’s thoughts. “If I’d gotten a pony for my birthday as I’d wanted, I could have ridden out with Halwyn instead of being hot here in the carriage.”
Grace smiled. Saffron wanted to be near Halwyn, too.
“I’ll open a window for you, kitten, but I doubt it will do much good. You’ll probably just get a face full of dust,” George replied as he cracked open the small window. “Come, sit on my lap, and you can catch a bit of a breeze.”
Saffron’s blonde hair and blue eyes were much the same as Halwyn’s, Grace couldn’t help but think of him again. Although she didn’t need any prompts to think about him. Halwyn had been uppermost in her mind for weeks now. She sighed softly. Even though the carriage was moving slowly and she desperately wanted the journey to be over, her life was moving much too fast for her.
• • •
Halwyn rejoiced at the idea of riding out to the Hamptons on horseback. There was nothing worse on a hot July day than being stuck inside an enclosed carriage. His leg was still a bit tender, though, and after the first couple of miles, he wondered if being cooped up in a carriage would be such a bad idea after all. Even though he kept his horse as far off the crude road as possible, he could taste the dust billowing up from all the carriages wending their way out of town.
He was glad to be free from the unwieldy cast, though, and able to move about without any encumbrance. The doctor wanted him to leave the cast on one additional week, for good measure, but it was important to Halwyn to get through his wedding ceremony without it. He would prefer to believe there would be memorable festivities after the ceremony, too, between himself and Grace. But he had the real reason for this marriage uppermost in his mind, and doubted if his fantasies would come to life this weekend. Whether he approved of their circumstances or not, the marriage bed would undoubtedly be a lonely, cold one. On their wedding night, and every night for the next year until Grace would move out. However, he preferred not to have everyone in attendance made aware of the true facts behind his wedding day. Or of the fact that it annoyed him.
Parr caught up to him, riding his famous horse, the Grey Ghost. He brought his horse alongside Halwyn and glanced over.
“For a man about to get married, you dinna look too happy.” Parr grinned at him.
“The ceremony’s just for Mother, really. I’d prefer to run off and get it done quickly. I see no reason why we need to make a big fuss about it.”
“Aye, what we suffer for the ladies, eh? How’s the leg?”
Halwyn ran his hand down his leg, stopping for a moment at the site of the break. “It’s still a bit sore, and riding this horse might have been a mistake. But I couldn’t bear the thought of being confined to a crowded carriage for all these miles.”