Inwardly she resolved to do something. She refused to allow life to happen to her anymore without her in the driver’s seat. She’d lived too long allowing herself to be steered whichever way the wind blew. Enough. She was taking control. It had been a nice three–plus–week vacation from reality, but it was over. She had to free Rowan, but to do that she’d need money. Money meant a job.
Chapter Seven
H
ave you ever worked retail before?”
Jill had to shake her head. “But I’m a fast learner and a hard worker. I’m also very creative.”
“Mm hmm,” the Ikea manager made a noncommittal sound.
This was her first trip to the large furniture store located only a few miles from The Program campus. Emma had let her use her computer and walked her through the online application process. Amazingly enough, she’d heard back from the store within a few days and scheduled an interview. Today, she’d used three of her precious dollars to take the bus down the road to Ikea, and from there it was an easy one–block walk to the large blue and gold store.
Thea had loaned her an appropriate work outfit. She’d protested, but in the end acknowledged she couldn’t go to the interview in jeans and an old sweater, which was the extent of her wardrobe. She resolved to buy one fancier outfit with her first paycheck. If she got the job.
“We don’t have any openings for visual managers right now, but you never know what opens up, especially for hard workers.” The manager smiled at her for the first time, and she smiled back.
She held her breath and crossed her fingers, hoping and praying his next words were “you’re hired.”
“No, we don’t have room for another visual manager, but we do need a sales floor staff member in the lighting department.”
“I’ll take it,” she blurted and received a chuckle.
“I appreciate the enthusiasm. Are you available at nights and weekends? We expect employees to be able to close at least two or three nights a week.”
“Absolutely. This job will be my first priority.”
“Great. As soon as your background check comes through, we’ll get a start date on the calendar.”
“I can start tomorrow.”
Again he laughed. “And we could use you tomorrow, but we have to get the HR paperwork completed first.”
“Oh,” she said. “What kind of paperwork?”
“Simple forms, and of course we’ll need two forms of identification.” He reached into a drawer at his right. She was tickled to note it was the same desk on display in the store, only a little messier. A white paper form was slid across the desk to her. She stared at it blankly. Now was probably the time to tell him the last name she’d used on the job application was not her legal name.
“If you have a passport, that’s easiest, but driver’s license and birth certificate will work. You are legally allowed to work in the US?”
“Um, I guess so,” she said with a sinking feeling. This was the problem of not having ever had a real job. She had no idea how to fill all the boxes out, and she definitely did not have a passport. “Mr. Singh, I…I have to tell you something.”
Her new boss paused, his pen tapping, and looked at her.
“Blacker isn’t my real last name.”
“Is there a reason you’re using the wrong last name?” he asked, sounding a lot less friendly.
She bit her lip, not sure what to tell him. He could be one of the conservative crazies who wanted her returned to Jack. Or he could be sympathetic. She decided to take the risk. She needed this job. “I left my husband,” she said finally. “I don’t want him to be able to find me, because he abused me.”
Mr. Singh was very quiet and then he spoke. “I have a daughter. She’s a teenager now, but she’s starting to date. I would kill any man who hurt her.”
She relaxed slightly.
“Tell you what. Complete the paperwork with your legal name, but your nametag will only have your first name, and we’ll introduce you as Jill Blacker. Does that work?”
“Thank you.” Her smile grew radiant, then shrank as she looked back at the required paperwork to legally work at Ikea. “I only have a driver’s license. Is that enough?”
He frowned. “Do you have your social security card or birth certificate?”
She shook her head.
“Any way to safely get it?”
“I don’t know. I suppose I could call my mother to see if she has copies, but most of my government documents are in the house with my husband in his safe.” When they were first married, Jack had stuck their marriage certificate and her social security card in the wall safe. At the time, it had made her feel secure. Now she realized how stupid she was to never have insisted on having her own key.
“Jill, I’m going to put your start date as one week from today. That’s how much time I can give you to get your paperwork in order.”
“Okay.” She nodded. “Thank you.” She gathered up the paper and turned to leave. She was a mixed bag of emotions. On one hand, she had a job offer. On the other, being able to accept it was complicated.
She walked through the wide open parking lot filled with mini vans and SUVs on her way to the bus stop. The bus took a while to arrive, and her thin coat did little to protect her from the wind, especially without her sweater underneath as an extra layer. By the time the bus pulled up, her numb fingers took two tries to slide the dollar into the stile. The suburban scenery flashed by in a blur as her mind whirred with worry about how to solve her problem. Her biggest concern this morning had been sneaking out and back into The Program compound. Now, she had a job offer, but no easy path to accept it.
Off in the distance, she saw the brick wall with barbed wire top of The Program. She hurriedly pressed the buzzer to alert the driver she wanted to get off at the next stop and stood to walk to the bus’s exit.
She was greeted at the side gate of the compound. Emma had shown her the safest exit, since a small group of protestors had set up camp outside the main entrance along with a TV crew or two. She didn’t need Jack knowing she was ever going off campus without a guard, but she deemed it an acceptable risk. Why would he ever assume she was working at the local Ikea? It would never occur to him to look for her there.
“Rowan’s looking for you,” the young guard at the gate warned. “Didn’t you tell him where you were?”
“Uh, I guess I forgot,” she lied. She hadn’t told Rowan she was leaving campus today. She planned on telling him if she got the job. He would’ve protested her leaving the safety of campus, and she feared she wouldn’t have been able to stand up to his pressure. She was getting the job for him. The sooner she got the job, the sooner, she could leave campus and let him find his real match, a woman who didn’t travel with a trunk full of baggage.
She’d tell Rowan tonight. She wouldn’t tell him she’d used his last name on her job application. That had been an impulsive decision, and she refused to examine her reasons too closely. They might reveal too much about her feelings toward her tall handsome roommate.
“Thanks for letting me in.” She waved to the guard and walked quickly to her apartment to change out of her borrowed clothes and back into her normal jeans.
“Where’ve you been?” Rowan jumped from the bed as soon as she opened the door. “I’ve been running all over campus looking for you.”
She took a quick step back. It was her muscle memory jumping into gear to protect her instinctively. For a horrible moment, Rowan’s large body resembled Jack’s just before he was about to hit her.
Rowan immediately backed up and sat on the bed. He even sat on his hand to signal she was safe. Her heart beat rapidly, but she relaxed, telling herself Rowan would never physically harm her.
“I went out,” she said. “Emma and Thea knew where I went.”
“But I didn’t.” His voice rose again.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to tell you until I knew for sure. I went for a job interview.”
“A what?”
“An interview. You know, where I had to answer questions and meet my potential boss.”
“I know what a job interview is. I want to know why, and why am I only hearing about it now?”
“Because I thought you’d try to talk me out of it,” she said.
“Damn straight. I’m busting my ass to keep you safe, and you go running off campus without security. What the fuck, Jill?”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, feeling guilty she’d caused him worry. “I had to. I’m trying to help you.”
“Help
me
? What the fuck?” he repeated.
“I can’t move out and start over unless I have money, and I need a job to earn money.”
His face contorted slightly. “Is that what you want? To move out?”
“Don’t you want your room back?” She was confused. She’d thought he’d be excited for her, and happy to get his old life back. Instead he looked insulted and bereft.
He was quiet for a moment, then finally he shrugged. “If that’s what you want. Listen, I gotta go back to work. I came to see if you wanted to grab lunch, but”—he glanced at his watch—“too late.”
“Sorry.”
He walked away. She watched him until he was in the doorway, and then he turned back. “I didn’t ask; did you get the job?”
She gave him a radiant smile. “Yes. I’m going to be a sales floor person at Ikea. In the lighting department.”
“That’s awesome, Jill. Good job.”
She started to ask him about I–9 forms, but he’d already quit the room, leaving her feeling lonely. She wanted to dance and celebrate her first step toward independence with someone, but the person she most wanted to be with had left.
Rowan stalked down the hallway, hammering at the corridor’s wall with the side of his fist. Jill was leaving him. It hadn’t even occurred to her to tell him her plans. Nor did she seem sad about abandoning him. They were a match, and she didn’t seem affected by him at all. He’d nearly gone off the rails when he hadn’t been able to find her at lunchtime. He’d jumped to the conclusion that her ex or some lunatic had gotten a hold of her.
No, she’d put herself in danger going off campus on her own. Thea and Emma had known. He wanted to chew them out, but he’d have to go through Ryan and Xander first.
He slammed out of the residential building, striding toward the main office. His anger made the three–minute walk fly by. “Shep,” he called, pushing open the man’s office without knocking.
Shep looked up from his desk. Gavin and Xander were sprawled in the chairs in front of Shep’s desk. “Rowan, next time knock first.”
He ignored the order and pointed his finger at Xander. “Your woman helped Jill leave campus today.”
Xander rose. “Get your finger out of my face.”
Gavin rose also, positioning himself to step between the two men if necessary.
Rowan lowered his finger. “Did you know?”
“Know what?”
“That Emma was aiding and abetting my woman to leave campus and put herself in danger.”
Xander stepped back and frowned. “No.”
His anger dissipated at Xander’s confession, but the adrenaline of fear still ran in his veins. “She wants to get a job off–campus.” He turned to Shep. “You’ve got to stop this.”
His commander leaned back in his chair and looked amused. “Why should I? You called her your woman, but I’ve seen no evidence she belongs to you.”
His anger was still at boiling point, but he managed to hold his tongue while trying to think of a response. Xander surprised the heck out of him when he spoke up.
“You let Loren stay on campus before she and Adam were officially a match,” Xander said.
Rowan hadn’t known that little detail. Now he was really pissed. “What the fuck? It’s ‘cause I’m disabled, isn’t it? I’m less of an asset than my brother, so you don’t give a shit.”
“Sit down, Rowan.” Shep’s tone reminded them all that he was the big swinging dick in this world. “Xander, Gavin, we’ll finish later.”
Gavin discreetly exited as Rowan found a seat. Surprisingly Xander chose to stay. Perhaps he felt involved because Emma had befriended Jill.
“I let Loren stay on campus before she and Adam were officially matched because they’d already slept together. I knew it was only a matter of time before they made it official. I’ve seen no evidence you and Jill feel the DNA pull.”
“We do,” he said loudly.
“Do you both?” Shep’s question was sympathetic, which was the only reason he didn’t punch him.
“I do,” he muttered.
“Just because you and Jill are a match on Doctor Wise’s charts, doesn’t mean it’ll work in reality. Jill might have too much damage to let herself enter into a match with you.”
“Don’t call her damaged.”
“I’m not,” Shep said. “I’m simply pointing out that we don’t know if she’ll make you a good match in the near or long–term future.”
He fell silent and looked at his feet. There was nothing to say, because Shep’s point had been a secret fear he’d been harboring ever since Loren and Adam’s wedding. He’d shared his bed with Jill that night, and every night since. He knew he didn’t ever want to sleep in a bed without her, but he didn’t know if she felt the same.
Xander cleared his throat. “Walk with me,” he said.
Rowan swiveled to look at his trainer, who’d become more of his mentor and friend in the past few months, especially since he’d matched to Emma.
“Okay.” Shit, his voice cracked. He swallowed, hoping neither of the other men had caught his wimp moment.
When they were in the hallway, they took a moment to zip their coats and then headed out into the cold day. Spring was on the horizon, but winter was having its last hurrah before it went into hibernation.
“I feel your pain, man,” Xander said, once they were far enough away from any buildings to be overheard. They strolled toward the woodsy part of the campus where the running track was.
“What do you mean?”
“You and Jill. It’s like me and Emma, only Jill is me, and you’re Emma.”
He stopped walking and eyed the tall, muscular soldier at his side who looked nothing like the petite feminine Jill. “You’re Jill?” His doubt clung to his words.
Xander gave him a light shove, and he stumbled on the muddy ground. “Don’t be an ass. I’m speaking metaphorically.”
Rowan was about to make a crack about Xander knowing such big words, but then the meaning behind Xander’s words sunk in, and he closed his mouth.