Zoey And The Nice Guy (Big Girl Panties #1) (21 page)

All three adults on the couch sarcastically said, “Awww.”

Zoey giggled, and Kellen buried his face in her neck, about as happy as he’d ever been, surrounded by his friends and family and holding a warm woman in his arms.
 

And then a sharp, smoke-scratched voice disrupted the tranquil mood. “Hey, y’all opened presents already?”

Everyone turned to see Tracy coming from the hallway in her robe. She poured herself a cup of coffee and sat in one of the recliners. “I’m so disappointed,” she said. “I really wanted to see the kids open their gifts.”

“I’m sorry, Mom,” Zoey said. “I didn’t know.”
 

“Oh, well,” Tracy sighed. “Jayce Gilmore, is that you?” She leaned forward, flashing a view of her cleavage.

Jayce was already sitting up, stiff as a board, his eyes wide and his face red. He cast a desperate glance at Kellen, who had no clue what was going on. “Uh, hey, Ms. Odell,” he said.

“Oh, honey, please. After that night in your daddy’s pickup truck, I think you can call me Tracy. Come here.” She stood, and he met her halfway for a hug he obviously didn’t want.
 

Kellen clamped his arms tight around Zoey who was already beginning to vibrate. As soon as Jayce sat back down, he turned to Zoey. “I did not have—I didn’t—we didn’t—I swear to God, Zoey—“

“Oh, relax,” Tracy said. “We only made out a little.”

Jayce nodded vigorously. “And I was seventeen, Zoey. Seventeen. And drunk.”

“A very mature seventeen,” Tracy added.

“Oh, God.” Jayce fell back against the couch and closed his eyes.
 

“I’m sorry, Jayce,” Zoey said in a tense and scarily quiet voice, “but you’re going to have to die.”

He sighed. “I understand.”

Kellen couldn’t stop gaping at his best friend. “Why did you never tell me this, man?”

Jayce sat up. “I believe I did. I was practically living with you, back then. I’m sure I told you.”

“No. No way. I would have remembered.”

“Does it matter?” Zoey shrieked. And then for no reason at all, she punched Kellen in the shoulder.
 

Maya and Addy were both staring at Jayce. He glanced at each of them. “Well, I think I’ll go,” he said, leaning forward.
 

Addy grabbed him by the back of his shirt and pulled him back down. “I made out with you, too. Remember?”

“He made out with everyone,” Zoey said.

“Only when he was drunk,” Kellen said.
 

“He didn’t make out with me,” Maya said.

Jayce turned to her, his expression more hurt than Kellen had ever seen it. “Yes I did. You don’t remember?”

Maya frowned in thought.

Jayce’s jaw dropped.
 

Kellen felt for him. Probably the one make-out session that had meant anything to him and she didn’t remember.

“Well I’m about to take the kids to Mom and Dad’s,” Kellen said. “You wanna come with us?”

Jayce tore his gaze from Maya, who was still trying to remember the most important moment in Jayce’s life. “Uh, no. Thanks, man. Your mom hates me. Plus I gotta take the old man out to breakfast.”

“You don’t gotta.”

Jayce shrugged. “He called yesterday. Said, ‘Hey, shithead, we having Christmas breakfast?’ And I said ‘yeah.’ How could I not? I mean, all the love…it just gets ya right here.” He pounded his fist to his heart and grinned.
 

Kellen shook his head. He never could understand how Jayce could be so nonchalant about that relationship. “If you change your mind, come on by.”

“Thanks.” Jayce stood, casting one last, longing glance at Maya.
 

Kellen walked him out the front door and closed it behind him.
 

Jayce turned to face him.

Kellen laughed. “Don’t you hate it when your youthful mistakes come back to humiliate your ass?”

Jayce’s expression shuttered. “Yes. Yes I do.”

“Was she any good?”

Jayce looked at him like he’d lost his mind. “I don’t remember. But gross. What the hell was wrong with me?”

“You were horny and had abandonment issues. You had that phase there where you were chasing women in their forties. Remember that?”

Jayce nodded. “Yeah, I guess I do.”

“Don’t worry about it. I won’t let Zoey murder you in your sleep.”

He laughed bitterly. “May as well let her.” He frowned down at his feet. Then he shook his head. “How’s she doing?”

Kellen understood the subject change. “You saw her.”

Jayce nodded; his hands clenching into fists. Kellen knew he’d be thinking about how beaten Maya looked and how much he wanted to punch Damon. “She seemed pretty relaxed.”

“Good painkillers.”

“Shit. I thought she just found me charming.”

“I’m sure she did.”

Jayce shook his head. “Doesn’t matter. Look I’m going. You have a cozy Christmas with the new girlfriend, okay?”

Girlfriend? That stunned Kellen into silence. He watched Jayce’s truck disappear down the road as he mulled it over.
 

Kellen went back inside to find Zoey handing her mom a small box.
 

“I got you a present,” she said. “If you want it.”

“I love presents!” Tracy said. “Of course I want it.” Tracy opened it. “Oh, earrings,” she said. “I love them. Did you see the earrings Mark got me?”

She sat Zoey’s earrings on the table and then pushed her hair back to reveal the ones in her ears.

“They’re lovely,” Zoey said, disappointment tainting her voice.

Kellen went for more coffee. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could sit here and watch this woman he cared so much about throw herself at someone who obviously didn’t love her. He heard Tracy follow him. She held her coffee cup out, and he topped it off for her. Then as he was returning the carafe, she cupped his right ass-cheek and squeezed.

He turned and looked straight at Zoey, silently begging her for permission to tell this woman to keep her damn hands off of him. However, Zoey’s wide, frightened eyes, and a shake of her head, told him she wanted him to be silent. He would do his best.

Tracy didn’t notice the interchange as she moved back to her recliner. Kellen stayed in the kitchen with his arms folded over his chest.
 

“You know,” Tracy said, “I dreamed last night that I was in a Kellen and Mark sandwich. It was so hot.”

Zoey’s face paled. The smile she wore was a sad mask.
 

“Isn’t it great that we can date men of the same age?” Tracy asked. “It’s like we’re more like sisters than mother and daughter.”

“Yeah,” Zoey said. The earrings sat on the table, ignored.

“Maybe we can double date while we’re here,” Tracy said.

Kellen finally made his way back to Zoey’s side. “Exactly how long are you here?” Kellen asked.
 

Zoey whipped her head around and said, “She’s here as long as she wants. You got a problem with that?”

Kellen wondered how she could make mere words feel like a slap in the face. “Nope. No problem.”

She held eye contact for a long moment before turning back to her mom. “A double date sounds fun,” she said.

“Great! Maybe tomorrow night?” Tracy replied.

“Sure.”

Kellen supposed it was time to have a conversation with Zoey about communication within a relationship. But this wasn’t the place. He did want to get away, though.

“Hey, Matthew? Sophie?” he shouted. The kids came running out of their room. “If you guys get dressed, we’ll go over to Grandma and Grandpa’s for breakfast.”

“Really?” they both asked.

He laughed. “Yeah, really.”

“Is Mom coming?”

“No, she’s gonna stay here and rest.”

“Is Aunt Zoey coming?”
 

“Why would Aunt Zoey come?” he asked. It came out of his mouth without any thought, and then he sat there wondering why it had.

Zoey was also frowning, clearly confused and slightly discomfited. They looked at each other.

And then Matthew answered the question. “Because she’s your girlfriend. Ain’t she?”

This thing between them had happened so strangely. Fast and sneaky. They stared into each other’s eyes, and he wondered if she was doing the same thing he was—calculating his obligations to her and where exactly she belonged in his life. This cocoon they’d been living in wouldn’t hold them for long.
 

“No, Matthew,” Zoey said. “I’m staying here, but I hope you kids have a great time.”

Matthew and Sophie jumped up and ran to their room to get dressed.

Kellen did the only thing he could think to: he kissed her. There was something in the kiss that said what he couldn’t find words to say. At least, he hoped it did. Her lips certainly responded. With words, she was prickly and often cruel, but when he kissed her, she submitted. She accepted him and gave of herself. She became soft and sweet.
 

He slipped his tongue between her lips and she joined him. Tracy made some off color remark and Addy responded to her, but Kellen didn’t care. He needed this. It was the only way to understand Zoey and to be understood by her. He wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly against him, plundering her mouth. Here was connection, even more than the sex they’d had. Even more than the conversation.
 

He kissed her until he sensed that she’d completely given herself to him, then he pulled away and cradled her against him, looking down into her blue eyes. She was his, right then. There was nothing but pure, anger-free Zoey in those eyes. Her lips were parted, red, and swollen. He kissed her forehead. “I’d invite you to my parents’, I really would, but I couldn’t guarantee you a good reception. My mom thinks you’re the devil’s bride.”

She grinned up at him. “Talk me up. When you think she’ll be receptive, I’ll apologize.”

“Really?”

“Sure. I should have just politely told her that she didn’t need to do what she’d done, and then asked her not to call anymore without apologizing to Maya first. That would have been the sane way to behave, right?”

“Yes,” he said, laughing, “it would have.”

“I think you’re rubbing off on me, Kellen.”

He kissed her again and then untangled himself from her arms. She dropped her head back against the sofa. Her arms lay where they’d fallen when he stood. He grinned down at her. “You’re beautiful, Zoey.”

Her smile faded and her eyes widened. She didn’t speak, so he moved on, checking on Matthew and Sophie. Once they were dressed, he helped them into their coats and snow boots and then led them out to his truck.

Zoey sat there, paralyzed with contentment. She felt her eyes stinging and then two tears spilling over. At the sound of his truck leaving, something broke inside of her. Her chest swelled and she leaned forward, struggling to breathe. She could only stare in front of her, feeling like she was suddenly free-falling with no net to catch her.

Addy and Maya appeared at her sides, both touching her and stroking her hair.
 

“You never had a man tell you you’re beautiful?” Addy asked.

Zoey shook her head. “Not like that. No. Not like that.”

“You can trust him,” Maya said. “Kellen is the best man I know.”

Zoey suddenly gasped. “Oh, my God. Oh, God, I’m gonna fuck this up. I can’t be with him. What was I thinking? He’s too good for me!” She jumped up and paced, trying to keep up with her pounding heart.
 

“What are you talking about, baby doll?” Tracy said. “You’re plenty hot enough for him.”

“I’m certain that’s not what she means,” Addy snapped at Tracy before turning her attention back to Zoey. “Calm down.”

Zoey paced and shoved a hand into her mass of hair. “I just figured we’d fool around. I mean, I figured it would fizzle. But, it isn’t going to fizzle, is it? This isn’t just a fling, is it?” She turned to her friends. “Is it?” she shrieked.

They both jumped back. Maya laughed. “Jeez, Zoey, everything is so intense with you. Of course it’s not just a fling. He’s clearly crazy about you, and you about him. So just relax into it. Everything’s going to work out.”

“No,” Zoey said, shaking her head. “No way. No, I can’t do that. I can’t do this. He’s too good, do you hear me? Too good.” She leaned on the last word, trying to convey to them that it was his goodness, his virtue, his pure-heartedness that she couldn’t handle. “I’ll forever feel inadequate. He’ll figure out he can do better and he’ll leave. I couldn’t possibly please him. I couldn’t be good enough. Shit, what was I thinking?”

Addy stood, grabbed her by the shoulders, and shoved her onto the sofa. “You need a drink.”

“I need medication.”

Addy ignored her and went to the kitchen. She returned with wine, which Zoey gulped down in one breath. She held out the glass to Addy, who laughed and brought back a refill. She drank this one more slowly.

“I don’t see what the big deal is,” Tracy said. “You’re the one who’s too good for him. I mean, he’s hot, but you can do better. Have fun with him while you can, and then ditch him before he ditches you. Simple.”

Zoey ignored her, because she knew that Tracy had no idea what love was. Love. God, had the word really entered into the conversation? Yes, she was certain of it. Love was what he was saying with those kisses. What neither of them could say with words.

She shook her head. “I can’t do this to him. You guys were right.”

“No, we weren’t,” Maya said. “This is it, Zoey. He’s it. He was there all the time, all you needed was to open your eyes and your heart. Now that you have, the hard part’s over.”

Zoey kept shaking her head. “He doesn’t know what he’s getting into. I’ll hurt him.” She was repeating the words she’d been told by others, only now she understood them. Now she had a proper fear of them.
 

“Stop it, woman, for the love of God!” Addy shouted. “He likes you. It’s done. Enjoy it.”

Zoey met Addy’s eyes, wanting to believe her. She nodded. “You’re right,” she said, not believing a word of it. “I’m overcomplicating it. Whatever happens happens, right?”

“That’s right,” Addy said. “Be grateful for it. Enjoy it, okay? I mean, Kellen Bradley…you’d be a fool to throw that away.”