Worth the Risk (14 page)

Hannah woke with her bare legs rasping against Stephen’s blue jeans. He’d gotten rid of his shirt sometime during the night, and her cheek rested against his bare chest. The size and heat of a man’s body, new and…incredibly awesome. Her own shirt bunched halfway up her ribs. Everywhere her body touched his was hot. Everywhere it didn’t was cold.

Hannah peeked up at his face. His beautiful brown eyes were still closed, a dark shadow covered his jawline. So big and solid and…male.

The silky hair on his chest tickled her palm as her fingers explored. Over his flat nipples, then lower to his stomach until his hand clamped down over hers and she squeaked.

“Did you sleep?” His voice, a low sexy rumble under her ear, vibrated to all the parts he’d touched last night. Touched and tasted. Her face went hot.

“Yes.” Better than she could ever remember. Sated, relaxed, and without a single dream, tucked in tight against his body. “Did you?” She shifted her leg over the top of his thigh and he groaned. His arm around her tightened.

“Yes.”

She moved her leg again and he took the hand he held to his chest and slapped it over her thigh, holding her still. “You have to stop moving.”

She felt him growing hard against her other leg, reminding her of what they’d done last night. And what they hadn’t. He’d done everything for her and she’d done virtually nothing. Surely not what a man like Stephen was used to.

The room was growing lighter, and regardless of all they’d shared, she wasn’t that brave; wasn’t ready to lie here half naked beside him in the daylight. “I should go take a shower.”

“One of us should,” he said, sounding pained. With his fingers in her hair, he pulled her back until he could press a quick kiss to her lips. “Out.” He gave her bottom a pat.

Safe in the bathroom, she stripped and stepped under the spray of the shower. Her breasts had that pins-and-needles feeling, a combination of hot water and hotter memories. Stephen’s hands and mouth, touching her, kissing her. Her legs spread, his mouth…

Lord.
She shivered and chills covered her skin, remembering the things he’d done. She could still feel him, driving her over an electrical current until she exploded.

She cut the water and stepped out, wondering if Stephen would still be there, or would he slip out. Instead she heard not one male voice, but two.

Oh, shit.

She stuffed her wet arms into a short robe and flew through her bedroom. It was a small house and she could already make out the angry words.

“Where’s my sister, McKinney?”

Nick’s voice was furious, Stephen’s perfectly pleasant. “I believe Hannah’s in the shower. I can get her if you want.”

That did it. Nick pushed his way in. “Hannah!”

They both caught sight of her at once. Hair dripping, legs bare. And even from across the room, Stephen’s hot gaze made her tingle. He was barefoot, wearing only jeans, unbuttoned at the top. He looked exactly like a man who’d hastily dressed.

Nick had a very different reaction. “What the hell?” He stabbed his fingers through his hair. “Get some fucking clothes on.”

“Excuse me? It’s my house. You’re the one who barged in.”

“Me? You’re in the shower and he’s—” Nick gestured toward her room. “What the fuck, Hannah. What the hell is wrong with you?”

The sting of Nick’s words barely sank in before Stephen was in her brother’s face. “Watch yourself. Brother or no brother, you won’t talk to her like that again.”

“Please don’t tell me you slept with him.”

Stephen grinned at her brother like a wolf, though it did nothing to hide the temper simmering beneath the surface. “Well, there wasn’t a lot of sleeping.”

The air crackled with the testosterone of angry men. Nick shoved him back and that was it. Stephen slammed Nick into the wall behind them hard enough to rattle pictures and held him in place with a forearm to his throat.

Nick twisted, spun, and his fist connected solidly with Stephen’s jaw. It knocked him back a step, but he didn’t go down.

“Let’s go,” Stephen said.

Nick’s face was as dark and dangerous as she’d ever seen it. “Outside and gladly. I’ve wanted to kick your ass since the first time I saw you.”

Another punch had them backed onto the porch. The next took them the last two steps and they landed hard on the ground, where they rolled and grappled.

“Stop it!”

After several more seconds, they rolled apart, both breathing hard, swiping at lips.

Embarrassed, she turned and went inside, a mix of footsteps following. With the robe wrapped tightly around her, she stood at the counter as they came in. Both men were scraped and dirty; Nick had a leaf in his hair. Several pine needles hung on Stephen’s chest. Her distress must have been obvious because they looked repentant, their expressions like little boys in trouble.

Stephen stepped to her first and she touched the corner of his mouth. “You’re bleeding.”

He swiped at his mouth with the back of his hand, shrugged. “Guys fight. It’s what we do.”

“Yeah,” Nick agreed from the door, opening and closing his right fist like he was stretching out his fingers. “No harm done. We’re both still standing.”

An uncomfortable silence hung around them.

“I need to talk to my sister.”

Stephen wrapped a possessive arm around her shoulder. “I’ll stay as long as Hannah wants me to stay.”

Her eyes flicked between them and she caught Nick’s wounded expression like she was choosing the opposing team. “It’s okay. Nick’s right. We should talk.” Plus she couldn’t quite look Stephen in the eye yet.

“You sure?” Stephen asked.

She nodded and Stephen went back to her bedroom. Neither she nor Nick spoke in the seconds it took him to return with shoes and shirt on.

Looking completely at ease, Stephen bent and kissed her cheek. “I like the robe.” He straightened and spoke in a louder voice. “I’ll call you.”

The door closed, leaving just Nick. “So? What’s with the FBI knocking down my door?”

“It’s Thursday.”

Right. The day Nick set aside to have breakfast with her. She moved to the sink and wet a dish towel. His lip was bleeding too. “Hannah, what were you thinking?”

“When?”

“When you let him…”

“Let him what, Nick? You don’t know what happened and I’m sure as hell not telling you.” She tossed him the damp cloth.

“I’m not letting that asshole hurt you.”

Would he hurt her? Maybe. Probably. But last night he’d made her feel amazing. Beyond amazing. Was it all because he felt guilty for before?

“He has a reputation, Han. He’s not the kind of guy to—”

“To what? You can say it. To want a girl who looks like me?”

“Jesus, Hannah. No!”

“Then what? He’s seen my scars. Have you?”

Nick pressed his fingers against his temples. “Don’t do this.”

She put her foot on the end of the couch and opened her robe, showing leg from the knee down. She watched Nick’s nostrils flare with his internal battle not to look away. “You can’t even look at them.”

He stared at the towel in his hand. “That’s not true.”

“It is.” And even though she understood, it hurt.

“You’re past all that.”

“Am I? How can I be past it when you remind me every single day?”

He opened his mouth to deny it.

“You do, Nick. I’m sorry, but you do.” Tears and her own guilt clogged her throat, but she had to say it. “Every time you warn me. Every worried look reminds me of what I did and how it hurt you. And you’re so afraid it will happen again, you make me afraid. I’m tired of being afraid, Nick.”

She shook her head. “I don’t need a reminder. I’m reminded every single day of what happened. What I did. Every time I look at myself, every time I move and something aches. But how can I trust myself when you don’t trust me?”

“It’s not that, it’s just…” Nick sank into the couch, resting his forearms on his knees. Guilt emanated until she thought she might choke on it.

“Look.” She laid a hand on his burdened shoulder. “I know you love me. I never knew my mother, never even knew she was gone, and you filled that role, you—”

“You knew.”

“What?”

“You knew about having a mother. I held you in that church next to three teenage boys all determined not to shed a tear. But as they pushed the caskets by…even at two years old you were smart enough to know and you screamed for her.
God,
you screamed, until I thought the stained glass in the windows would shatter. You cried for weeks, months, and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do.”

She looked at the man who’d been everything to her. Her parents. Her brother. Her hero. “You did it. You were there.” But he needed to let go, just a little, for both their sakes.

“Mia thinks Stephen might be good for me.”

“I don’t give a damn what Mia thinks.”

“Why? Why would you say that?”

“Because I don’t trust her, especially when it comes to you. And you knew that or you wouldn’t have kept it a secret.”

Maybe, but she was still surprised by the level of animosity. He’d loved her once. “What’s the deal, Nick?”

“There is no deal. It was a long time ago and I had a lot going on. Doesn’t matter.”

“It matters to me. Especially since I was the
lot going on
.”

“I don’t want to talk about Mia.”

She cocked her head at him. “No. You want to talk about Stephen.”

“Damn it.” Nick dropped his head in his hands. “I really hate that guy.”

She couldn’t help but smile at her large-and-in-charge brother’s pouty tone. “It must be hard for you, so used to giving orders and watching people jump.”

He gave her a look.

“You know I’m right. And I’m glad. I love my scary FBI brother. But you have to know it’s not going to translate here.” She motioned between the two of them. “I need to act normal, do normal things, if I ever want to
feel
normal. And I do, Nick. I’ve been doing more hiding than living. Stephen makes me forget.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of. That you’ll forget. That you’ll get hurt.” His phone buzzed and he checked the screen. “Shit. I have to go.”

“That’s fine. I have an appointment to get ready for.”

He stood. “Don’t see him anymore, Hannah. Don’t give me one more thing to worry about.”

“Make things right with Mia. Don’t give me one more thing to feel guilty about.”

He showed no sign he meant to comply. Neither did she.

Stephen finished up another day with more than work on his mind. He’d checked in with Hannah last night, a phone call, a text. But it wasn’t enough and he meant to change that. Immediately. He just had one person to see first.

He packed away his laptop, stuck in a few files. “I’m heading out.”

“Out?” his admin repeated. “Are you ill?”

“I’m fine, Dee. I have a meeting.”

“Oh.” Dee’s shocked expression faded to understanding. “A business meeting. Then I’ll see you Monday.”

“See you Monday.” He smiled as he passed and didn’t correct her. It wasn’t business, it was more important than that.

He spent the short drive to the Norfolk FBI office thinking about just how important it was. And convincing himself he was doing the right thing.

After passing through several security measures and waiting while Hannah’s brother verified his visit, he was allowed through. Stephen paused at the door with a frosted glass window. Very seventies. But he was in the right place, the brass label read
SA Walker.

His knock was answered with a terse “Come in.” Stephen opened the door and got a good look at Hannah’s brother before he bothered to look up. Head down, eyes on one of the many papers scattered across his desk amid mugs, soda cans, and a balled-up Taco Bell wrapper. He looked intense and irritated. He was about to get more so. He closed the door with a click behind him.

“McKinney. As if my day couldn’t get any worse.”

“Good to see you too, Walker.”

“What the hell do you want?”

“I want to talk to you about Hannah.”

Nick picked up a mug, started to take a sip, then thought better of it. “Try again. Because that’s the last thing I’m talking about with you. Other than to go over all the various ways I can keep you away from her.”

Stephen held his ground. “You can try. I’ve got something to say and I’ll say it. But before I get to that…” He walked farther into the room but didn’t sit. This was difficult. As difficult as anything he’d ever done. “She told me some of it. I want to hear all of it. Need to hear all of it.”

“I don’t owe you anything.”

“No. You don’t. But I care about your sister.”

A multitude of expressions passed over the agent’s face. Possibly debating the merits of having him bodily removed and dumped in a ravine. But something won out, and he raked his hands over his face like he was rubbing away a bad memory.

“How did you find her?” Stephen prompted when Nick didn’t answer right away.

“Maybe you should know,” Nick said. “Maybe that’s exactly what you need,” he added almost to himself. “How did we finally find her? After forty-two days and seventeen hours? A neighbor smelled something, reported it. All that time…” He shook his head. “All that time she’d been just twenty miles from my house.

“The smell ended up being his own mother. He’d killed her at some point and…God, I felt like I’d been looking for her forever. A lifetime. It
was
a lifetime. Following every lead. Threatening every suspect.”

Stephen stood at the window now. Looking out but not seeing. His stomach already revolting, knowing Hannah had barely touched on the horror.

“And then we found her. The nightmare ended, only to start a new one. I can still see it, still smell it. The odor was…All I could think going into that basement was, she’s dead. And then I saw her and I was sure of it. So tiny, like a broken doll. Almost unrecognizable. He’d used a bat. A knife. Cuts, slices. Some healing, others festering. Both legs were broken in multiple places, same as her arms. Three were compound. Hands broken. Ribs. A punctured lung. If we hadn’t found her when we did…” Nick’s voice broke. “She was so cold.”

Stephen felt the acid filling his mouth, but he would hear all of it.

“Lips busted, eyes swollen shut. A crude IV line we later learned he’d used to keep her alive. And awake. When I think about what she went through…Hey. Sit down. You’re whiter than death.”

“I’m good.” He choked out the words but they both knew it was a lie. How could he ever be good again?

“If you’re going to be sick, don’t do it in here.”

He took a deep breath in and out through his nose. “Finish it.”

Nick closed his eyes for a long second, like he needed a reprieve as well. “We didn’t know if she’d ever walk again. Speak again. Didn’t know if she’d ever function.”

How does someone function after something like that?

“Eventually she went home, though she had so many surgeries it didn’t seem like she was really home. Drugged out of her mind. Screaming from nightmares, from the dark. Even screamed when we touched her. Jesus Christ, she was like my child and I couldn’t even hug her.”

Nick’s voice shook, mirroring what Stephen felt inside.

“Did he…” He couldn’t say it and thankfully Nick knew.

“No. They don’t think he could. But he did…other things.”

“Is he alive?” The words burned on his tongue.

“Yes. Doing life in Connecticut state pen, though there’s rumblings of moving him to a downgraded mental facility. I’m not going to let that happen. You know, he got more time for killing his mother than for what he did to Hannah?”

So Nick hadn’t killed him. He wanted to ask why. And what would Special Agent Walker think if he could see inside Stephen’s own mind?

“The FBI thought it best to get me to another state, probably right. And it was best for her as well, but believe me, I’m counting the days until he dies. And right or wrong, I will rejoice. To know that sick motherfucker is still breathing air in this world…” Nick shook his head.

Neither man spoke for several seconds. “I want to take her away from here,” Stephen said when Nick finally looked at him. “Out of town. I don’t need your permission, and I didn’t have to come to you, but I figured it would cause Hannah less grief in the long run if I did.”

“Where?”

“I have a business thing in Vegas. Just for the night. It’ll be fun for her, good for her.” Or that was the plan.

Nick heaved a weary sigh. He picked up a different mug and put it down.

“I get it,” Stephen said. “The hostility. The anger.” It all made sense. Hannah’s body always covered, her apprehension, her fear. Luke losing it over her going to a stranger’s house. She was more child to them than sister. “If she was my sister, I’d want to wrap her up, hide her away. But she wouldn’t be happy like that. I even get that you might not care. But I’m taking her.”

“I swore I’d never let another man hurt her. You can take that as more than a warning. It’s a promise.”

Stephen gave a small nod of understanding and left Nick’s office. If he did hurt her, he’d deserve whatever he got.