Worth Taking The Risk (21 page)

“Yes. Give me the address.” I started the car and headed to the direction he told me. “Thanks Ambrose.” and I hung up.

Twenty minutes later I was seating in a couch with a cup of water in my hands leaning into Ambrose and having my back stroked by his boyfriend, Chris.

Slowly I began to tell them both what had happened. How after having some amazing time Mitch suddenly began to change. How he became so distant and cold towards me. The day of the breakup. The excuses. Practically telling me to go with Chad. How he, out of the blue, didn’t want me anymore.

“Baby I’m sorry.” Ambrose hugged me and I felt safe.

“I love him Ambrose and I never got to tell him.” and more tears came rushing out of my eyes.

He didn’t say anything, just held me tight. He knew I didn’t like the ‘it will all be okay’ or ‘it’ll get better’ neither the ‘he doesn’t deserve you’ or ‘he’s an idiot’. Because all of that got me worse. So he did what he always did, Ambrose was my anchor. My best friend. The one who, no matter what, will always be there.

After three hours of feeling miserable and crying all the tears out of my system I was somewhat ready to face the rest of the day.

“I think I should head home.”

“Are you sure?” Ambrose looked at me with concern in his eyes.

“I’m not doing anything stupid.” I assured.

“You can stay here if you want.” Chris offered.

I smiled a little. “Thanks Chris but I’ve cause enough trouble. I’ll come around some other time.”

They both nodded and hugged me goodbye.

I got inside the car and instead of heading straight home I went to the cemetery.

Kneeling in front of the three graves I bowed my head and began spilling my heart out.

God I missed them so much. Having them gone is like having no family at all. My dad is practically unstable. He is in some other world. Sometimes he comes back to reality and I cherish those moments but recently they have been so few of them.

I don’t know how long I stay there, staring at their graves wishing I had mom next to me so I could ask for advice. Wishing I had Hester to tell her my secrets and share my adventures. Wishing my little brother, Mitch, would make fun of me and then beg for me to play with him. I wished my father would tell me he loved me just one more time.

Whipping the tears away I got up and went inside my car then headed home.

Maggie was seating In the living room when I got there. She started living with us a few weeks ago and that included Chad. Ambrose hasn’t finished taking his stuff to Chris’ apartment.

I am content that everyone is happy but I want my happy ending too…so much.

“Honey have you been crying?!” concern quickly enveloped her eyes as she came to look at me.

“Nothing important Maggie. Don’t worry.”

“Don’t worry? You’re like a daughter to me, of course I’ll worry.” there was hurt in her eyes now.

“Mitch broke up with me, now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to my room. I’m really tired.” I kissed her cheek and then walked up to my room.

I changed into my pajamas and was ready to sleep the rest of the evening and maybe, just maybe waking up until the next day. But as always Chad had to walk into my room and ruin it.

“You could at least knocked.”

Chad shrugged and came to seat next to me on the bed. “Ma told me what happened. I could say I’m sorry but I’m not.”

“Oh fuck off.”

He swiftly ignored me. “I’m not sorry because now that he’s out of the equation you can come back to me, where you belong.”

I sighed. “Chad what we had is over. Please stop. I don’t want you.” after those words came out of my lips I winced.

The man I loved didn’t love me and I didn’t love the boy that
did
want me. You typical love story.

“Only one way to find out.”

Before I could stop him he kissed me. It wasn’t gentle, it wasn’t passionate, it was…nothing. I couldn’t bring myself to feel anything.

I couldn’t even manage to kiss back. So I let him take what he wanted of the kiss and sat still.

Seconds after he pulled back with a smug face.

I know what I’m about to say is going to be harsh and mean but… “Chad, I didn’t feel anything.”

Anger was clear in his eyes and in a flash I was on my back and he was straddling me, both my wrists trapped by his strong hands.

“Why? Why can you let everyone else touch you and not me?”

“Get off!” I tried to get free but it was no use.

“I want you, I love you but you don’t give a damn do you? You don’t care what any of us feel. You just want sex. Tell me did you fuck Mitch?”

My eyes began to water and he slapped me. “You did! You little whore. First his friend and then him? But guess what? Now its my turn.”

“No Chad, please don’t.” I begged as he began to kiss my neck and roam his hands everywhere. I took my chance and kneed him where the sun doesn’t shine and he rolled off me.

I ran to the door and held it open. “Get out. Get the fuck out. Now!”

He seemed to come back to his senses and his eyes widened. “Keller I’m sorry. I don’t know what got to me. I was pissed and, god I’m so sorry!”

“Get out Chad.”

“Baby it wont happen again. Please forgive me.”

I shook my head. “You have to understand that what was between us is in the past.”

“I love you Keller. I’m not giving up.” he tried to touch me but I backed away. Then he was out the door.

I sighed and tried to block everything that happened today and fell asleep.

When I woke up I had ten missed calls and a message. I frowned when they were all from Nathan. I opened the message.

Meet me at Starbucks at 9

I changed into a comfortable pair of jeans and a checkered button up shirt. Let my hair as it was and ran down the stairs.

“Maggie I’m leaving early.”

She nodded but there was worry in her eyes. I went to kiss my dad on the forehead as he ate.

“Keller wait up!”

I turned around and saw Chad coming towards me.

“About yesterday-”

“It’s forgotten. don’t bring it up again.”

He smiled a little. “Can I hug you?”

“Okay.”

He hugged me and I felt the affection but then I pulled away. “I have to go.”

Chad nodded and I walked to my car and headed to the café.

There he was seating alone at the table at the corner of the café.

“Hey Nathan.” I said and sat down across from him.

“Keller.”

“So what is that you wanted me to be here for?”

“It’s about Mitch.”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“You aren’t, I am.” Nathan stared at me, when he noticed I wasn’t going to bolt out of my seat he continued. “Richard finally found a doctor who is willing to take Mitch’s case. They are getting everything ready for the surgery. He’s scared Keller.”

“Scared of what?”

“Of loosing you. Of not being able to walk normally again.” Nathan explained.

“I fell in love with him, I don’t care about the crutches. I told him that, Nate. But he doesn’t care.”

“It’s because he cares that he let you go Keller. Can’t you see he loves you? He doesn’t want you to take care of him his whole life.”

“I don’t have to. He is very independent and you know that.”

Nathan sighed. “Yes, I know. Just let him know that you’re there, that you wont leave.”

I groaned and got up.

“Where’re you going?”

“To knock some since into Mitch’s thick head.”

Nathan smiled and nodded, I returned the smile and left the café.

Mitch here I come.

Chapter 30

I was angry and hurt.

My knuckles went white as I held the steering wheel on my way to Mitch’s house.

I can’t believe he thought I would leave if he couldn’t walk again. God he’s an idiot.

When I got to his place I got out of the can and went to abuse the door bell. I hope his parents aren’t home because I wont stop myself even if they are.

Soon enough he opened the door, irritated. “Didn’t have to abuse the bell.” he snapped and started walking.

I closed the door and waited for him to take a seat at the living room.

“Why did you break up with me?” I went straight to the point.

Clearly caught off guard he took his sweet time to answer me. The answer just fuelled my anger. “Can’t you just get over it and move on?”

“No!” I snapped then sighed. “Why didn’t you tell me about the surgery?”

His eyes widened. “Who told you?”

“That doesn’t matter. I want to know why.”

He looked away from me and I went to him, kneeling in front of him. “Mitch.”

He finally looked at me.

“I’m not leaving you.”

Something flashed in his eyes but was quickly gone. “I don’t want you to be tied to someone like me.”

“Stop saying that. I already told you I don’t mind your crutches.”

“What if I don’t come out good from the surgery? What if things get worse?” there was raw fear in his voice and eyes. It made my heart ache. I never thought I’ll see him like this.

Frightened and vulnerable.

“You wont know unless you try. No matter how you come out of the surgery I’ll be there for you Mitch. I will not leave you.” I made sure to look him in the eye when I said that. I wanted him to believe it.

Mitch sighed and without saying a word he pulled me on his lap and hugged me. I went still for a moment but then completely relaxed and hugged him back.

After a while I pulled back and placed my hands on both sides of his face and pressed my lips against his for about three seconds. Then I looked at his beautiful green eyes.

“Don’t you ever do this to me again okay? Because next time I’ll beat you up. I love you and it wont change even if you keep pushing me away. I’ll always be here.” then I kissed him again.

But he pushed me away. “What did you say?”

I blinked. “You want me to repeat it all?”

“No, no. Just the last part.”

“I’ll always be here.”

He groaned and shook his head. “You said you loved me.”

“Oh.” that. “Ohm, well mom thought me not to lie.”

“Tell me that you love me.”

Is this really happening? “I love you.”

“Again.” he closed his eyes.

“I love you.”

“Again.” this time he said it against my lips.

“I love you so much.”

We kissed for a long time. My lips started to hurt thanks to Mitch since he liked to bite. Once we pulled away I noticed his lips too were swollen.

He leaned closer to my ear and whispered something that had my heart racing like the wings of a hummingbird.

“I love you.”

I didn’t have to tell him to repeat himself because I heard those three words loud and clear. So clear that I nearly cried.

Then I was hugging him and kissing him all over the face.

-

“Are you hungry?” I asked him after a while of just hugging.

“Yes. Can you make me scrambled eggs with pancakes and bacon on the side.” he tapped his chin. “I’ll help you make coffee.”

I smiled. “You sure you can eat all that?”

“Yes. I’m starving.”

We walked into the kitchen and while I cooked he made coffee.

Then we were seating down and I gathered the courage to ask. “Mitch?”

“Yeah?” he looked at me with a smile.

“When is the surgery?”

He blinked, then frowned. “The day after tomorrow.”

I wanted to punch him. But instead I nodded. “Want to go catch a movie tomorrow?”

Caught off guard he just nodded.

I smiled, I wanted to spend time with him. Make him forget about everything for just a few hours.

“Which movie?” he asked.

“Which ever you choose.”

He narrowed his eyes at me. “Does it matter if it isn’t a romantic film?”

“Nope.” I usually cry with really romantic movies and I don’t want him to see me like that. I prefer more action and slight dramatic ones.

“Alright how about the hunger games or avengers?”

“Those are good. let’s go for the hunger games. Ambrose keeps bragging how good it is and how I haven’t seen it.” I chuckled and Mitch nodded.

-

Once we finished I washed the dishes and Mitch sat there watching me. It made me nervous but I didn’t say anything.

After washing the last cup I dried my hands and turned around. He motioned me with his index finger and I went to stand in front of him. His left hand went to my hip and pulled me closer. Then he kissed me, slowly and gently. But after a few seconds it got more passionate, my hands gripped his hand as he deepened the kiss. His tongue sending chills down my spine and making me moan in pleasure.