Worst Week Ever (A Long Road to Love) (7 page)

Damn it! He
couldn’t go to Chelsey’s wearing glitter.

He wanted to
kill the little fellow, but forced a smile and tried in vain to brush the crap
off. Having no luck, he waved at the laughing crowd and sat back down.

Carrie
immediately set about picking off tiny pieces of glitter. Soon Tiny and Tall
joined her.

Tall scowled
at his partner. “You’ve caused enough trouble. Go on with the next skit while I
repair your damage.”

Tiny climbed
onto the stage with help from an elderly lady in the front row. The little fellow
then returned to the edge of the stage and offered Tall a giant blow torch he'd
plucked from thin air.

 “Tiny just
get on with the next act.” Tall looked at the audience. “Tiny will be
performing our next magic act on his own, playing both my role and his. If all
goes well, he will succeed in making himself disappear.”

While the crew
set up for the magic act and mopped the floor, Tall pulled out a vacuum cleaner
hose from his suit jacket, had Carrie start it by swatting him on his rear-end,
and began to vacuum the glitter from the suit. In order to do so, Trent had to stand
and hold out his arms.

Carrie
helpfully pointed out missed glitter. Finally, Tall stepped back so the
audience could see Trent. “How’s that.”

They roared
with laughter, including Carrie as she shook her head. Trent looked down and
discovered his glittery crotch remained the only place Tall hadn’t vacuumed.

He held out
his hand for the vacuum, but Tall insisted Carrie do it instead. Red faced, she
took the vacuum. God, he’d have an erection in front everyone if she touched
him.

“I’ll do it,”
he snapped.

Tall blocked
her from giving it to him. “Her or me, those are your choices.”

“Her,” Trent
replied, fearing Tall might make his balls disappear.

She pulled the
fabric as far away from his balls as she could. and after two embarrassing
minutes where Tall mimed an inaccurate but funny re-play of Carrie’s efforts,
Trent’s crotch became a glitter free zone.

The audience
gave them another round of applause. However, when Carrie returned to her seat,
Tall already occupied it. He patted his lap. Trent offered her his seat, but
Tall insisted he sit. “Now, pretty lady. It’s time to decide. His lap or mine?”

Carrie didn’t
hesitate. She sat on Trent’s lap to the audience’s happy cheers.

Trent watched
the final section of the show with the woman of his future, nestled in his lap.

At the
conclusion of another impossible ‘how’d they do it’ skit, the two men walked to
center stage and took their bow. Tall then motioned to Trent and Carrie. “Let’s
have a cheer for Trent and his lovely lady. They’ve been great sports, don’t you
think?”

The audience
roared with approval, and it gave Trent such a rush. Approbation had been a
rare commodity in his life.
God, it feels good
.

When they left
the auditorium, he smiled at the sight of Sam and his limo parked out front.

They climbed
inside. “Well done, Sam,” Trent said.

“Thank you,
sir. Fortunately, I did not wait for you to call before returning.”

Like a
punctured balloon, his sense of approval faded. “I apologize. Fifteen minutes
ago, Tiny doused me with glitter then Tall and Carrie vacuumed me clean.
Honestly, I had no idea when the end would arrive until they took their bow.”

Carrie spoke
in his defense. “It’s true, Sam. The magicians used Trent as their audience
participant.”

Sam sighed
heavily. “I would have paid full price to see that.”

Sam pulled the
limo in front of the restaurant only five minutes past their reservation. Trent
preferred arriving a half-hour late rather than be told to wait at the bar
until his table became available. However, he refused to ruin his and Carrie’s
happy mood with a scolding, so he let his driver’s mistake slide.

Most people
didn’t realize it, but he had to put himself in a bad mood before he could yell
or threaten to fire someone. He liked his current mood much too much to bury it
in anger.

As they walked
into the restaurant, Carrie tensed. He placed his hand on the small of her back
and leaned down to whisper. “Relax. You look like a million bucks.”

Her smile of
gratitude warmed his heart.

The maître d’
greeted him by name and led them to a corner table. Trent smiled. This ‘not a
date’ was turning out better than he could have hoped. Being seated on time at
Chelsey’s rarely happened. Soon a young waiter, barely out of diapers, arrived
with their preordered wine, ready to tell them the menu for the day.

Trent hated
verbal menus, but Chelsey’s took pride in changing the offerings nightly. Thus,
the waiters had to memorize ten appetizers, ten entrees, and ten desserts to
rattle off to tired and hungry people.

The young,
perky waiter made it through the ten appetizers with lightening speed, so much
so that Trent missed half of them. The fellow came to a halt after the fourth
entrée. Panic filled his eyes. Grateful for the opportunity to end this
nonsense, Trent asked, “Could you come back in ten minutes for our order?”

The boy sighed
with relief. “Yes, sir!” he said and darted off.

Carrie tilted
her head and studied Trent.

“What?” While
he prided himself on being able to read her mind, right now, he had no idea
what thoughts bounced about in her head.

“I had no idea
you could be so pleasant.”

Ouch. “Am I
really so horrible?”

She covered
his hand with hers. “No. But you’re usually stressed and it causes you to
channel your father.”

He chuckled.
“I remember the first time you used the phrase ‘channel my father.’”

She grimaced
and pulled her hand back. “Me too. You threatened to fire me.”

He sighed.
“You really pissed me off. Some fresh college graduate comes into my business,
and tries to change everything, including how I manage my people.”

Her hands
appeared to be in a fight with one another. He reached over and quelled their
movement. “Facing the possibility I did channel my father proved harder than
you probably realized. To be honest, I worked my whole life trying to get the
man’s approval, but I never made the grade.”

“I bet you
did, he just refused see it.” She met his eyes with great sincerity. “The first
time you threatened to fire me, I didn’t look for a new job because I realized
your heart wasn’t in the threat and I thought, and still believe, you have the
makings of a great boss. You just need to fire your dad.”

Trent laughed.
“Good thing he’s dead.”

He looked up
at heaven, then changed his mind and looked down at his feet. “Dad, you’re
fired. You never knew a damn thing about managing people…or your son for that
matter. You have no influence on the new Trent Lancaster.”

When he looked
up, the young waiter stood beside him, his head tilted as if trying to see if
someone resided under the table.

Carrie buried
her face in her hands. Her shoulders shook with laughter.

He smiled up
at the waiter. “Tell us the menu.”

The young man
went through his list of appetizers and entrees perfectly. His eyes sparkled
with accomplishment when he finished.

“Well done!
I’ll have the calamari appetizer and the braised lamb.” He tugged Carrie’s arm.
“Want to come out of hiding and tell the young man what you wish to eat?”

She uncovered
her face and looked up. “I’ll also have the calamari appetizer and the salmon.”

The young man
wrote nothing down, only nodded and hurried off.

“Did you scare
him senseless by talking to your foot?” She burst into laughter again and could
barely finish her point. “He didn’t even write down our orders.”

Trent eyed her
wine glass, barely touched. “I’d tell you to lighten up on the wine, if you had
actually drunk any. After all the funny moments we’ve had tonight, I fail to
see how firing my dad set you off.”

Covering her
mouth, she shook her head and held her hand palm out, which he interpreted as a
silent plea to stop talking.

He remained
quiet until she’d calmed enough to remove her hand from her mouth.

“Maybe I’ll
channel Tiny now. He’d be one scary manager, crawling out of people’s
wastebaskets and causing their porn and games to disappear from the computer.”

Carrie
re-covered her mouth, her eyes sparkled with such joy as she nodded.

Half the
diners side-glanced in their direction, being too well mannered to turn and
stare straight on. Yesterday, Trent would have scolded her out of her humor
just to stop them from staring, but being the sacrificial goat for Tall and
Tiny had taught him not to fear attention in itself. She laughed quietly,
nothing to annoy or disturb the others. If anything, Carrie’s laughter seemed
contagious. The diners at the tables closest by also smiled.

The waiter
returned with a giant plate of lightly fried calamari resting in seasoned
tomato sauce. “Would you like more wine?”

Trent shook
his head. “She’s still working on her first sip. In fact, the small amount
missing may just be due to evaporation.”

The young man
brow furrowed slightly and he stared at the ceiling as if trying to figure out
how the sun could evaporate the wine inside a building. Carrie burst into more
mouth-covered laughing. Trent struggled not to join her.

After the
fellow left, he bit into a calamari ring. “Stop laughing and taste this,” he
insisted as he fed her a ring.

She sobered at
once and scooted closer to him and the giant plate. “Aren’t appetizers supposed
to tantalize appetite? This looks like a full blown meal!”

“I think the
waiter has fallen in love with your laugh. The last time I came here, they gave
me a saucer with five rings on it.”

She shook her
head. “No, this is your doing.”

He raised his
eyebrows in challenge. “The waiter has fallen in love with
my
laugh?”

She’d been
about to hand-feed him in return, but he made her laugh causing the delicious
morsel to wave about like a plane hitting turbulence. Trent captured her hand,
led it to his mouth—and crossed a line.

The moment his
lips touched her fingertips in the sensuous act of consuming the calamari, she
sobered and pulled her hand to her lap. Her face flushed. “No, I meant…I mean…”
She took a deep breath. “He appreciated you letting him go away and review the
dinner list.”

Damn it! He’d
moved too fast and alarmed her. Deciding to ignore the moment, he nodded in
agreement and fed himself another calamari.

Two uniquely
identifiable people entered the restaurant, causing everyone to stop and stare.
Not even the über rich could resist gawking at two well-dressed gentlemen, one
almost twice the size of the other.

Tall had
pulled his long black hair into a ponytail, while Tiny had gelled his frizzy
orange hair enough to look respectable.

Tiny spotted Carrie
and said something to Tall. The giant looked over and smiled. He spoke to the maître
d’, who frowned then left them at the front while he approached Trent.

“Excuse me,
sir, but those two gentlemen wish to join your table. Shall I tell them it is
not possible?”

“Oh, we’d love
to have them!” Carrie replied.

Knowing all
too well which of them would pay the bill, the man waited for Trent to answer.

His seduction
efforts had just crashed and burned, so company sounded like an excellent
distraction. “Bring them over.” He nodded at Tall and Tiny. Needing no further
prompting, Tiny burrowed his way between the tables. Tall stared up at the
ceiling and waited like a gentleman for the waiter.

Naturally,
Tiny climbed into the chair beside Carrie and kissed her hand. “I have missed
you greatly, my dearest,” he declared in a refined British accent.

Tall arrived,
sat in the remaining chair and smiled at Trent. “Sorry for the invasion, but we
grow weary of talking to each other.” He stared longingly at the calamari.

Trent scooted
the plate across the table between the two of them. “Please have the rest.”

 “Are you
sure?”

Carrie nodded.
“If we eat anymore, we’ll have no room for dinner.”

Tiny and Tall
devoured the food like starving refugees. By the time the young waiter returned
to tell them the menus, no calamari remained.

“Just tell
them the entrees,” Trent suggested.

The waiter
frowned.

Realizing the fellow
couldn’t start in the middle of his memorized list, Trent sighed. “Go ahead and
tell them the appetizers. They might still wish to order one.”

Tall and Tiny
ordered two calamari appetizers, the quail and a tofu vegetarian dish.

After the
waiter left, Tall spoke. “We’ve been in make-up since eight this morning,
shooting a commercial.”

Tiny added,
“We can’t eat in makeup. Thus, we’re starved.”

“Given all the
energy you expend on stage, I’m surprised you’re still walking,” Trent stated.
“However, I should warn you, your appetizer will probably be smaller.”

Tiny ceased
his silent admiration of Carrie to focus on Trent. “Why? Does your waiter not
like magicians?”

God only knows
what Tiny might do to the poor waiter if he felt mistreated. “No. Our dish was
enlarged because I came to his rescue when he had a brain freeze.”

Sure enough,
when the waiter returned a few minutes later with the calamari, five lonely
pieces sat upon the dish. Tall sighed. “Could you bring me a big platter of
calamari and charge me for however many appetizers it takes?”

The waiter
smiled and hurried off. Trent waited until he’d left to speak. “You should be
aware the calamari appetizer costs about twenty dollars.”

Carrie choked.
“That’s four dollars a calamari ring.”

Tiny patted
her hand. “Don’t worry, we won’t disappear and stick you with the bill.”

Trent smiled.
“I hadn’t considered the possibility, but you two could actually pull it off.”
He sighed as he recalled their show. “I know you guys are probably sick of
hearing this, but you have mastered not just one art, but several. I felt
honored to have seen your show.”

Tiny shook his
head. “Nope, we never get tired of hearing that.” He smiled at Carrie. “Any
chance you would like to ditch your boss and become a groupie?”

Trent didn’t
care for the question, but graciously answered for her. “My business would go
under if she left me. Before I hired this enthusiastic college grad, it was
headed toward bankruptcy. I had no idea what a gem I’d found. I just hoped her
perky personality would mean she’d actually do her job. Never did I think her
‘can do’ attitude and the brilliant brain would literally save my company from
disaster.”

Tall and Tiny
both smiled at Carrie in admiration. She leaned across the table and whispered.
“It proved harder than I expected. He has, hands down, the worst employees
imaginable. None of them would tell me anything when I came to work, not even
the location of the bathroom. I just had to wander about and find things.

“When I
introduced myself to the lady sitting at the first desk in the main room, I
expected her to welcome me and tell me her name, but she just stared at me as
if some alien creature had dropped in asking for a cow to eviscerate.”

Tiny chuckled
and wrote something on a pad from his pocket.

“I learned a
month later, Miss. Schnell heads the payroll department. As long as she didn’t
meet me, she didn’t have to put me in the new system, which she hates. She
prefers ledgers, which she no longer keeps, since that’s not what the boss
wants anymore.”

About to take
a sip of wine, Trent paused and set the glass on the table. “So how are people
getting put on payroll?” If they weren’t receiving a paycheck, it could explain
why they didn’t feel the need to actually work.

“Jack learned
how to put people on payroll so his boss could hire all his family and
friends.”

His stomach
roiled. “And that’s how you got put on payroll?”

“It took me a
whole month to discover who could put me in the system, and another month to
discover Jack loves cookies.”

“You didn’t
get paid for two months?” Tiny asked in outrage.

She chuckled.
“I’d been working for eight-seven days when I received my first and rather
sizable check.”

Trent frowned,
having no recollection of this. “Did you tell me you weren't getting paid?”

She sighed.
“No.”

“Why not?”

“To be honest,
given how often you threatened to fire me, I feared if you knew I had yet to
become a legal employee, you’d just send me packing and call it fate.”

God, what a
bastard she’d thought him and, listening to her side, he couldn’t blame her. He
gripped her hand and stared into her blue eyes. “I know it’s late in the game
to say this, but I am really sorry for the way I treated you back then.”

She covered
his hand and smiled. “I didn’t take it personally. After all, you yelled at the
others far more often than you yelled at me. And the first time you identified
the portrait of the angry man behind your desk as your deceased father, I
understood your Jekyll and Hyde act.”

Tiny scribbled
frantically in his notebook.

Their dinners
arrived along with a huge mound of calamari. Trent saw no hope of eating half
this food. He stared in amazement as the magicians attacked the  calamari.