Winter Blockbuster 2012 (74 page)

He had shown her some men were not like Charles Barrett. For that she would always care for him.

And worry about him. As she ran her hand slowly up and down his muscled forearm she felt the rough, jagged line of a scar marring his skin. It reminded her of the perils of his
life, and she shivered again to think of his constant danger. Of what a blank world it would be without him in it.

They both had scars to bear.

‘I wonder you have never found yourself married, Rob,’ she said. ‘Many of the players have wives.’

Rob gave a humourless laugh. ‘Because wedlock sounds such a fine state to you, Anna?’

‘I made a foolish choice. I see that now. But my father often speaks of my mother tenderly.’ She had to learn to make better choices now, to see things for what they were. Not always wrapped in warm, comforting night as she was now.

‘My parents, too, had a harmonious union. But I didn’t inherit their easy tempers. I’m too full of anger to make a good husband.’

Anna closed her hand over Rob’s, holding him close. ‘You use your anger to defend those weaker than yourself, never to bully them! I see that time after time.’ He had changed
her
life entirely, all because of the wonderful life force of who he was. She would never be the same again.

‘It is true that if your husband was alive now he would have to fear for his existence,’ Rob said. That anger was still there in his voice, but banked and solid. ‘Bullies should be thrashed in the streets and thrown into the Thames.’

‘My bloodthirsty side agrees with you wholeheartedly,’ Anna said with a laugh. ‘Were
you
bullied as child, Rob? Is that what makes you so quick to fight now?’ She found she wanted desperately to know this—to know more about him. To know every thing, all he kept hidden in his heart.

‘Nay, not I. Even as a child I was too eager with my fists, and the village lads avoided me. But there was someone I cared for who was hurt.’

‘A sweetheart?’ Anna asked, her heart aching at the deep, heavy sadness she sensed in his voice. It was as if for a single
instant the dark core of his heart was opened to her and she glimpsed his hidden self. Just as she had dared show him hers.

Then the moment was over, as if a door had slammed shut, and Rob kissed her temple with a reckless laugh. ‘Just someone who is long gone from my life, fairest Anna. But, as you urge me to marry, I say you should be the one to choose a spouse. Not all men are as your late husband, and you deserve a kind companion who will look after you.’

Anna smiled sadly, thinking of Henry Ennis and his attentions. He seemed good enough—if a bit too eager, and burningly jealous when she looked at Rob. But Henry could never be the man for her. That bittersweet feeling lingered like a faint, lost perfume that faded with every passing tick of the clock. ‘Not I. I’m happy with my life as it is,’ she said, staring out into the night beyond the window. It was deepest dark out there and perfectly quiet, without even a bird’s song. ‘It’s a long while until morning.’

‘What shall we do with so much time?’ he asked teasingly. He bore her down to the bed and lay down on his side next to her, propped up on his elbow as he lazily studied the length of her body. His fingers deftly toyed with the ribbons of her chemise, his touch brushing her nipples through the thin linen.

A new sort of shiver took hold of Anna—a warm feeling deep in her belly of desire reborn. She had to hold on to Rob, on to her feelings for him, as long as she could. She had to relish the passion that sprang so easily between them, and remember it for the rest of her life.

‘I can think of a few things …’ he said deeply, seductively, and leaned over to kiss her mouth hungrily. It was a long time before she knew anything else but him.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

H
ENRY
Ennis stopped at the end of Seething Lane, trying to catch his breath. He felt as if he had run all the way from Southwark, his chest tight and his throat aching. He loosened the high collar of his doublet with sweating hands, but still that heavy cloud pressed down on him.

He glanced back over his shoulder, but even as he thought to run away from his resolved task the door opened. One of Walsingham’s men stood there, bearded and grey-faced in his black robe. He gave Henry a humourless twist of a smile.

‘Master Ennis, at last,’ he said. ‘Secretary Walsingham has long been expecting you since he received your most intriguing message.’

Henry was forced to step into the dimly lit hall, and the door clanged shut behind him. He swept his cap from his head and twisted it between his hands as the man led him towards the stairs.

This had all seemed such a fine idea when his father’s old friend Thomas Sheldon had approached him with his proposition: gather bits of information from his fellow actors and pass them on to Sheldon, and sometimes slide coded passages
into pages of the play he was writing. It was so simple, and gained him a few extra coins.

It had seemed even better when he’d realised the Queen’s Secretary would also pay for such nuggets of intelligence, and his coffers grew. Walsingham and Sheldon both paid for information that flowed both ways. He’d even dared to think that with the extra money he might marry Anna Barrett.

Until that hope had been shattered. He rubbed at the wound on his leg, and his hatred of Robert Alden, born when they were both newcomers to Lord Henshaw’s Men, vying for the same roles, and nurtured over the years as Alden’s star rose and Henry’s stalled, flowed even hotter. When he’d seen Anna smile at Alden so tenderly, he’d snapped. It had been the final straw.

Why, then, was he so nervous? His hands were damp, his head pounding. He had to be strong now. Follow through on his plans. Soon his tormenter Alden would be gone from his life, and Anna would smile only at him.

He followed the man up the carved staircase and along a long, narrow corridor to a chamber at its end. Henry had never been so far before. Usually his messages were taken and his money handed over in the entrance hall. He didn’t like this walk at all. But he had to carry on with his plan now.

He had no choice.

The door opened and he was ushered into a small chamber piled with papers and heavy with the smell of ink and herbs and close air. Walsingham’s assistant, Master Phellipes, a sallow-faced, ferretlike man, was carefully steaming open wax seals by the window. It was said he could tamper with seals so well no one was ever the wiser that they had been read. Walsingham himself sat behind a desk with a ledger open before him.

‘Ah, Master Ennis,’ he said. ‘I trust your leg is healing?’

‘It is, Master Secretary,’ Henry answered, swallowing past the nervous knot in his throat. Of course Walsingham would know about the fight at the White Heron.

‘Excellent.’ Walsingham sat back in his chair and studied Henry over his steepled fingertips. ‘Now, tell me how you know the traitor we seek within the White Heron …’

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

‘S
HALL
I race you across the park?’ Rob challenged as he led Anna down the stairs of Hart Castle towards the open front doors.

Anna laughed, trailing behind him. ‘You would win most handily, I fear. It’s been a long while since I was on a horse, and then it was only a docile old mare that carried me to country markets.’ She tugged on his hand, forcing him to stop and face her, and whispered, ‘In truth, I’m a bit nervous about this excursion today. What if I fall off and make a fool of myself in front of everyone?’

Rob didn’t laugh at her, as she’d half feared he might. He seemed to be afraid of nothing at all. He held her hands tightly in his and raised them to his lips for a gentle kiss.

‘You needn’t fear falling, Anna,’ he said. ‘‘Tis no wild hunt, racing through stream and bramble as the Queen enjoys. It’s just a day of hawking in the sunshine, and a picnic. I’ll be nearby, and so will Edward—we won’t let anything happen to you.’

She smiled at him. ‘You are quick in a fight, I know, Robert. Yet I doubt you are quite quick enough to fly to me in time to catch me, should my horse take a notion to throw me.’

Rob leaned closer and whispered in her ear, ‘I have talents you have not even seen yet, fairest Anna. If we but had time, I would demonstrate …’

Anna watched, fascinated, as he tilted his head and skimmed his lips in a soft, tantalising kiss over her cheek. Lower and lower, close to her mouth, until her own lips parted on a sigh.

But he drew back in a flash and tugged again at her hand, leading her towards the door. ‘I fear duty calls us, my dear,’ he said.

‘You are a wretch, Robert Alden,’ she declared. ‘I will have my revenge on you yet.’

He laughed. ‘I look forward to it.’

The party was gathering on the gravelled driveway in front of the house, a milling crowd of people, dogs and horses in the pale, misty morning light. Pages circulated amongst them with trays of goblets filled with warming spiced wine against the chilly morning.

Anna carefully smoothed her skirt and straightened her hat. She wore her own grey skirt and doublet for riding, but she had a new tall-crowned red-velvet hat and red leather gloves much like the riding ensembles of the other ladies. At least she would look well enough when she went tumbling to the ground, she thought. It was strange how Robert made her feel so very confident and carefree when she was with him. So very unlike herself.

Elizabeth stood with Edward and a russet-clad man holding a hooded hawk at the edge of the crowd. She waved at Anna and broke away to hurry over to her, her green and gold riding clothes bright and summery in the grey mist.

‘Good morning to you, Mistress Barrett! And to you, Robert,’ Elizabeth said. ‘Don’t you look quite … well-rested today.’

‘And you look most charming, as ever, Lady Elizabeth,’
Rob said with a bow. ‘The goddess of the sun, the herald of the day …’

‘Pah, it is too early for your poetry! Go and talk to Edward. He is aching to show off his new hawk,’ Elizabeth said with a shooing wave. ‘I will introduce Mistress Barrett to her horse.’

She didn’t wait for an answer, but looped her arm with Anna’s and led her towards a sleepy-looking grey mare. ‘Robert said you haven’t had the chance to ride very much of late, so I found the quietest mount in the stables for you,’ Elizabeth said. ‘She knows every inch of this park and will carry you most safely.’

‘That was very kind of you, Lady Elizabeth.’ Anna cautiously patted the horse’s soft nose, and laughed when it whinnied and nudged at her. ‘I’m sure we will do well enough together.’

‘I’m sure you will.’ Elizabeth laid her hand on the horse’s bridle, watching Anna closely. ‘Tell me, Mistress Barrett, are you enjoying yourself at Hart Castle?’

‘Very much. I don’t see how anyone could fail to enjoy being at such a fine house.’

‘Yes. Though, I fear it was not always so happy a place.’

‘How so, Lady Elizabeth?’

Elizabeth studied the gleaming windows of the house with a little frown. ‘When I first met Edward—when he brought me here—it was a house of great sadness and seemed very lonely. Since Edward had lost his brother he seldom came here, because he could not face the old memories. His grief was too deep, and he and the house were both sunk in some terrible spell of sad lifelessness.’

‘How awful,’ Anna whispered. She looked across the drive to where Edward stood with Rob, both of them laughing at some jest. ‘He doesn’t seem so sad now.’

‘Nay. Sometimes, my dear Mistress Barrett, a person
merely needs a reason to truly live again. A purpose that banishes the past and awakens them to the wonders of the present moment. A true passion.’

‘And he found that purpose with you?’

‘Me—and other things. Life is too uncertain and precious to waste, and love too rare to lose,’ Elizabeth said with a smile. ‘He and I both had to learn that. Maybe what happened to us could be useful for others, as well—others who struggle.’

Anna stared at the horse’s grey neck, unable to quite meet Elizabeth’s gaze. ‘You think I struggle?’

Elizabeth shrugged. ‘I have not known you long, Mistress Barrett—Anna—but I see the light in your eyes when you look at Robert, the way the two of you smile at each other. It’s as if there is no one else in the whole room—nothing else you see. That is also how I feel when I look at Edward.’

Somehow the understanding in Elizabeth’s soft voice, the truth of her words, melted Anna’s reserve. ‘I do care about Rob. But there is so much I don’t know about him, and what I do know tells me I must be cautious. My feelings frighten me a bit.’

Elizabeth nodded. ‘We can’t choose who we love, and I fear
our
hearts have not chosen easy men to care for. But my first marriage was not a happy one. My husband was much older than me, and not very kind. I thought I could never feel for a man as I do for Edward. I wasn’t even sure I
wanted
to feel that way!’

‘I am not sure, either,’ Anna murmured. Could she put the past behind her forever, and move forward as she had these last few days?

‘But I came to see it as a great gift, Anna, and you should, too!’ Elizabeth declared. ‘Just remember what I said—life is too fleeting for fear.’

‘My friends, shall we ride out?’ Edward called. ‘The day grows apace!’

Elizabeth gave Anna one last smile and hurried over to her own horse as a groom came to help Anna into the saddle. As she settled her skirts around her Elizabeth’s words echoed in her mind.
Too fleeting for fear
. Should she—could she—reach out and seize this time with Rob, no matter how brief, as a gift?

Rob reined in his horse next to hers and gave her a wide, white grin of sheer pleasure in the day. ‘Are you ready to run, Anna?’ he asked.

She nodded and laughed. ‘Aye, Rob. I am assuredly ready to run!’

‘Where are we going?’ Anna asked as Rob led her along the soft green banks of the river. He laughed that she whispered the words, as if they were sneaking away from the party in stealth, even though the chattering voices of the others were now a mere echo behind them.

Now the sumptuous picnic that had been laid out for the hunters in a shady grove had been consumed they were all falling into a happy lassitude, induced by fine wine and Elizabeth’s soft song played on her lute. Rob had taken Anna’s hand and lured her away from the group.