Willing Sacrifice (17 page)

At supper I picked at my food and waited for Donna to pick at my open weakness like a scab. This was worse than leaving Kyle, Sarah and Brian behind; this felt like they had been forced out and abandoned. Donna didn’t say anything aloud but the sarcastic smirk never left her face during the meal.

I noticed Robert picked at his meal as well but he didn’t look in my direction once.

“So what’s happening?” I asked quietly, feeling somewhat badly about my harsh words towards him earlier, but I needed to know if I was fighting tonight, and who.

He sifted through his food before answering. “Since there has been a change in pack numbers we are going to take a week break.” He sifted some more, “Until then, I think we are going to go on a camping trip into the mountains.”

No one said anything at first and I felt my smile spread. “I think that’s a good idea.” He looked up at me in surprise. That look made me realize how hard I had been on him. How much he really wanted my approval.

“When do we leave?” Someone asked.

He sat back making his chair creak, “Tomorrow morning before dawn. Someone else will be joining us as well.”

I bristled at the thought. “Who?”

He looked at me and just when I decided he wasn’t going to answer he shrugged, “My little cousin.”

***

In describing Robert’s cousin the word
little
would not have come to mind, maybe the word
tank
but not little. He was a hulk of a man with dark skin and light brown hair, but he had kind soft eyes. They were a sweet chocolate brown and it made me wonder if he had been his previous pack’s Omega. He was handsome, as were almost all werewolf males, but he didn’t tick my clock in the least. Some of the other girls though, well they were happy to just be getting some male attention, since Gage had removed himself from the game. Though he had been given permission to play with the bitten girls, he wasn’t taking any chances after feeling Elder Coon’s wrath. Gage gave most of the girls a wide berth, me most of all. I hardly ever saw him and hadn’t spoken to him more than to ask for the salt at the table during meals. As much as it irked me to admit it and the fact that I was pretty certain we wanted different things in this, Elder Coon had been right; we risked too much for something so trivial.

I packed a backpack to brimming with the important stuff, like toiletries, and changes of clothes. I didn’t bother with makeup or a pillow, which seemed to be the most important items in most of the other girls’ packs. We were out the door before the sun rose. Most of the girls talked excitedly about the change of pace but some still hadn’t woken up and carried travel mugs filled with strong coffee. I was totally psyched; a week in the woods after the trauma of the last week seemed like just the thing to bring me back to myself, and from the look on Robert’s face it was something he needed too.

The guys all carried the heavy coolers of food and what should have looked awkward seemed almost too easy for them.

The day was going to be a warm one, but not very humid yet. I fell behind until I was mostly alone, though I could still easily hear the chatter of the girls ahead of me. Focusing on the path ahead I breathed in the clean scent of the woods. A bevy of song birds were in performance and chipmunks were sounding the alarm, Jack had called them the tattle tails of the forest.

As soon as thoughts of Jack ensued I pushed them from my mind and took another deep breath of pollen filled air. I could tell which plant every particle came from; it held a signature scent unique to only those plants. It was the most beautiful perfume.

“What are you doing all the way back here?” Robert’s voice invaded my solace.

I glared because he had snuck up on me again; if he continued with this ninja shit, I was going to surgically attach bells to his most private areas.

Instead of looking guilty for scaring me he had this expression of annoyance because I hadn’t answered his question yet.

“I just needed some alone time.”

This to a Born werewolf who had been raised in a pack translated into
crazy
. They all hated to be alone ever, and most of all when they were hurting inside. “Is everything okay?” He finally asked.

“Do you honestly care either way?”

It was his turn to glare. “Sugar, I don’t understand you… but I’m trying. I am trying so hard it hurts, but you’re pushing so hard you’re making even a civil conversation almost impossible. The only time you’ve been anything but hostile to me is when you need something.”

“Well, you’re the Alpha; don’t I have to go through you anyway?”

“Sugar, God damn it woman, let your guard down for five seconds. I am not the bad guy here.”

I stopped walking, “You scare me.”

His mouth opened but no sound came out.

“You scare me because I don’t know how to read you. You are so strong and smart and stubborn and I’m not sure where I stand with you at any given moment.”

He found his voice. “I don’t mean to scare you.”

“What happens when you decide I’m not what you expected or that I‘m too broken to ever be right again? Will you force me to leave the pack or simply throw me out?”

“Whatever happened with Glen won’t happen with me.” He said without pausing.

I nodded, “What do you know of ghosts, Robert?”

The change of subject left him reeling to catch up. “What?”

“Do you know what will happen to me if I choose a mate?” When he didn’t respond I continued. “Jack will kill me.” My hand went to the medallion around my throat. “He’s been haunting me, and he’s made his point very clear. I am
his
. I wasn’t supposed to survive our separation; I was supposed to die. He won that Challenge and as far as he’s concerned I belong to him.”

“He can’t hurt you.”

I shook my head and smiled, “He has, and without this little necklace I am unprotected and just like in life, Jack will take what is his.”

Robert’s eyes flashed, “You don’t belong to him. You never did.”

We arrived at the campsite just before supper. It was on the top of a hill called McDaniel’s. It is only a nine hundred and six foot climb, but that climb is nearly vertical the entire way to the top.

Robert looked sick to his stomach after speaking with me, so I gave him plenty of space to think about what I told him. I helped some of the others unpack the tents and get dry wood for the fire, looking his way on occasion to see if his face would read out what he was thinking. I should have known better though; he was a closed book when it came to what he was feeling.

“We’re going for a run as a pack after dark tonight.” Robert announced after a full course dinner of beef stew and buttermilk biscuits.

I was suddenly feeling every bite of that meal sitting heavy in my gut.

He looked at me very pointedly before continuing so I forced a smile. The other girls were thrilled. “We’ll stay to the west side of the mountain.”

I considered this briefly. Did he know I wasn’t able to turn? Is that why he was giving me a go around? If I stayed on the east we could meet up at the lake and nobody would know. I watched him watching me with his all-knowing predatory stare, expecting a response. “Sounds like a plan to me.” I flashed my best smile and handed my dirty paper plate to Britney.

***

Dark fell; I couldn’t ignore the growing anxiety in my stomach. I felt as if I would throw up and have a major heart attack at the same time. From the map I was looking at, we were running to a pond on the far side of the mountain. On the east side – my side, it was quite a bit closer and the terrain was smoother. The pack was going to have to work hard on the uneven granite surface of the western side.

It was a bright night because of the clear sky and white light of a nearly full moon. The temperature had dropped significantly, at least thirty or forty degrees, which was the norm for this time of year in this area and the reason we didn’t have to worry too much about running into campers. I watched my breath fog out in front of me as I waited for the others to prepare. I mimicked a lot of their behaviors since I hadn’t actually ever run with the pack before. I had always been alone or with only one other wolf on my runs… when I could run. The boys changed first, melting into the tree line, not to be mystical, but because they wanted to sneak a peek at the girls undressing before they changed. I waited at the edge of the group until everyone seemed to be preoccupied before slipping onto the eastern trail. I watched from my spot before starting my own run to make sure no one saw me. My hands shook with anticipation as I waited for the girls to trot away slowly onto the western trail.

I barely let out a sigh when a strong hand came around my waist and another covered my mouth. There was no need to cover my mouth; I don’t scream when I’m surprised. Predators love the sound of screaming.

“Shhhh,” the man breathed in my ear.

I relaxed a little, realizing the scent was Robert’s. He released me and stepped back. “So, it’s true then?”

“What’s true?” I snapped.

“You can’t change?”

He was too smart to hide something like this from for very long, so I just shrugged. “Jack was the only one who could help me change.”

“I’ve never met someone who’s lasted that long without it.”

“Running helps.” I shrugged again.

“Sugar, have you ever considered that maybe Jack’s the one stopping your change now?”

“So you believe me, about the ghost thing?”

“Of course,” He looked confused. “Why wouldn’t I?”

I tried to ignore this before continuing, “I don’t think it’s him. I’ve never been able to change without drugs or Jack. The other males weren’t strong enough.”

Robert closed the distance between us and I backed against a small tree shaking its branches and my heart hammering into double time. “I’m not the other males, and it was up to Jack to teach you. He forced it out of you but didn’t bother teaching you because he was trying to keep you under his thumb.”

I was liking my dead husband less and less.

“D-do you think you c-could show me?” Okay now he was making me so nervous I was shivering and stuttering. Robert smiled and for the first time in what felt like weeks, it was a real smile. My knees nearly gave out.

He reached for my hand and took it gently in his. “I don’t think you trust me yet.”

“W-what m-makes you think-k that?” I shivered out between chattering teeth.

“We don’t shiver in the cold until it’s below zero, for one.”

I nodded in agreement. “W-we bett-ter get there or someone w-will notice we’re g-gone.”

“We are a whole lot closer than they are.” He stepped even closer, still holding my hand in his gentle grip.

“How m-much closer?” I stared at him with wide doe eyes.

“Oh, I’d say at least thirty minutes closer.”

“T-that’s a l-lot closer.”

He smiled and nodded, lowering his face down to my throat nuzzling me gently and pressing in the last few inches between us. I was a goner. I love it when a man nuzzles my throat, and it almost feels like he’s asking for permission before kissing me. It puts me at ease.

I offered more of my throat, a very submissive behavior in a werewolf pack, but I didn’t care. Suddenly Robert stiffened, all his muscles going hard instantly and he growled before softening against me again, taking in my scent and taste, very slowly nipping his way over my jaw to my lips. This was by far the best kiss ever, ’til he stiffened again, his eyes flashing. “Mine.”

“Robert,” I whispered, “You’re kind of hurting me.” He had me crushed against the tree so hard it was bending under our weight.

“Sorry.” He stepped back and tried flashing me another smile but it was forced.

What had I done wrong?

He ushered me forward after a moment of looking around and I stumbled on unsteady legs over the uneven ground. I stopped suddenly and turned on him. “What did I do?”

The hard planes of his face softened into a smile. “Nothing, your dead husband on the other hand wasn’t very pleased with my proximity to you.” He turned slightly and even in the low light of the dark I could see the claw marks etched in the flesh of his lower back and then across the broad expanse of his shoulders.

I did the girl thing and sucked in a shaky breath then covered my mouth with one hand.

He just smiled, “You’re a whole lot sweeter than you pretend to be.”

I felt my wide eyes automatically narrow into a glare.

This only prompted a laugh from Robert. I shouldn’t have been surprised; if he wasn’t scared of my dead husband tearing his back to ribbons when we made out, then he certainly wasn’t scared of me.

We took off at a hard run. I found out as a girl I could almost match Robert’s stride. He wasn’t used to running on two legs and it was slowing him down. We reached the pond and jumped in as soon as we were nude. The others hadn’t been far behind and before long the small cold pond was alive with splashing and playing. Robert stayed close to me. It was obvious he didn’t trust Jack and the calculating look in his eyes told me he was going to do something about it. Everyone climbed out of the water after our fingers started to prune. Donna watched me with a mischievous look in her eyes that made me nervous. I walked past her with the feel of her eyes on me, judging me.

“You know guys,” She said loudly. “I don’t remember seeing Sugar. Did any of you?”

A blush flamed up my cheeks.

Britney laughed, “I saw her; she was in the front the whole time; maybe that’s why you didn’t see her, Donna.”

Donna turned a venomous glare on Britney. “You did not see her.”

“No, she must have been mistaken.” Robert said from the edge of the water. “Sugar was with me on another trail.”

I didn’t move a muscle but my eyes rolled to look at Donna in time to see her face darken to nearly the same color red as her hair. For a moment I waited, expecting her head to deflate like a balloon being pinched closed while the air squeaks out but what she did do was even more terrifying. She smiled stiffly and walked into the woods ahead of the rest.

I thought briefly about how ironic it would be for me to meet my demise under an ax wielding redheaded werewolf named Donna, after all I had survived so far but quickly shook the thought.