Waiting for Godot (11 page)

ESTRAGON:

(
looking up angrily
)
.
Not so loud!

VLADIMIR:

(
softly
)
.

Bye bye bye bye

Bye bye bye bye

Bye bye bye bye

Bye bye . . .

Estragon sleeps. Vladimir gets up softly, takes off his coat and lays it across Estragon's shoulders, then starts walking up and down, swinging his arms to keep himself warm. Estragon wakes with a start, jumps up, casts about wildly. Vladimir runs to him,
puts his arms around him.
) There . . . there . . . Didi is here . . . don't be afraid . . .

ESTRAGON:

Ah!

VLADIMIR:

There . . . there . . . it's all over.

ESTRAGON:

I was falling—

VLADIMIR:

It's all over, it's all over.

ESTRAGON:

I was on top of a—

VLADIMIR:

Don't tell me! Come, we'll walk it off.

He takes Estragon by the arm and walks him up and down until Estragon refuses to go any further.

ESTRAGON:

That's enough. I'm tired.

VLADIMIR:

You'd rather be stuck there doing nothing?

ESTRAGON:

Yes.

VLADIMIR:

Please yourself.

He releases Estragon, picks up his coat and puts it on.

ESTRAGON:

Let's go.

VLADIMIR:

We can't.

ESTRAGON:

Why not?

VLADIMIR:

We're waiting for Godot.

ESTRAGON:

Ah! (
Vladimir walks up and down.
) Can you not stay still?

VLADIMIR:

I'm cold.

ESTRAGON:

We came too soon.

VLADIMIR:

It's always at nightfall.

ESTRAGON:

But night doesn't fall.

VLADIMIR:

It'll fall all of a sudden, like yesterday.

ESTRAGON:

Then it'll be night.

VLADIMIR:

And we can go.

ESTRAGON:

Then it'll be day again. (
Pause. Despairing.
) What'll we do, what'll we do!

VLADIMIR:

(
halting, violently
)
.
Will you stop whining! I've had about my bellyful of your lamentations!

ESTRAGON:

I'm going.

VLADIMIR:

(
seeing Lucky's hat
)
.
Well!

ESTRAGON:

Farewell.

VLADIMIR:

Lucky's hat. (
He goes towards it.
) I've been here an hour and never saw it. (
Very pleased.
) Fine!

ESTRAGON:

You'll never see me again.

VLADIMIR:

I knew it was the right place. Now our troubles are over. (
He picks up the hat, contemplates it, straightens it.
) Must have been a very fine hat. (
He puts it on in place of his own which he hands to Estragon.
) Here.

ESTRAGON:

What?

VLADIMIR:

Hold that.

Estragon takes Vladimir's hat. Vladimir adjusts Lucky's hat on his head. Estragon puts on Vladimir's hat in place of his own which he hands to Vladimir. Vladimir takes Estragon's hat. Estragon adjusts Vladimir's hat on his head. Vladimir puts on
Estragon's hat in place of Lucky's which he hands to Estragon. Estragon takes Lucky's hat. Vladimir adjusts Estragon's hat on his head. Estragon puts on Lucky's hat in place of Vladimir's which he hands to Vladimir. Vladimir takes his hat, Estragon
adjusts Lucky's hat on his head. Vladimir puts on his hat in place of Estragon's which he hands to Estragon. Estragon takes his hat. Vladimir adjusts his hat on his head. Estragon puts on his hat in place of Lucky's which he hands to Vladimir. Vladimir
takes Lucky's hat. Estragon adjusts his hat on his head. Vladimir puts on Lucky's hat in place of his own which he hands to Estragon. Estragon takes Vladimir's hat. Vladimir adjusts Lucky's hat on his head. Estragon hands Vladimir's hat back to Vladimir
who takes it and hands it back to Estragon who takes it and hands it back to Vladimir who takes it and throws it down.

How does it fit me?

ESTRAGON:

How would I know?

VLADIMIR:

No, but how do I look in it?

He turns his head coquettishly to and fro, minces like a mannequin.

ESTRAGON:

Hideous.

VLADIMIR:

Yes, but not more so than usual?

ESTRAGON:

Neither more nor less.

VLADIMIR:

Then I can keep it. Mine irked me. (
Pause.
) How shall I say? (
Pause.
) It itched me.

He takes off Lucky's hat, peers into it, shakes it, knocks on the crown, puts it on again.

ESTRAGON:

I'm going.

Silence.

VLADIMIR:

Will you not play?

ESTRAGON:

Play at what?

VLADIMIR:

We could play at Pozzo and Lucky.

ESTRAGON:

Never heard of it.

VLADIMIR:

I'll do Lucky, you do Pozzo. (
He imitates Lucky sagging under the weight of his baggage. Estragon looks at him with stupefaction.
) Go on.

ESTRAGON:

What am I to do?

VLADIMIR:

Curse me!

ESTRAGON:

(
after reflection
)
.
Naughty!

VLADIMIR:

Stronger!

ESTRAGON:

Gonococcus! Spirochete!

Vladimir sways back and forth, doubled in two.

VLADIMIR:

Tell me to think.

ESTRAGON:

What?

VLADIMIR:

Say, Think, pig!

ESTRAGON:

Think, pig!

Silence.

VLADIMIR:

I can't.

ESTRAGON:

That's enough of that.

VLADIMIR:

Tell me to dance.

ESTRAGON:

I'm going.

VLADIMIR:

Dance, hog! (
He writhes. Exit Estragon left, precipitately.
) I can't! (
He looks up, misses Estragon.
) Gogo! (
He moves wildly about the stage. Enter Estragon left, panting. He hastens towards Vladimir, falls into his arms.
) There you are again at last!

ESTRAGON:

I'm accursed!

VLADIMIR:

Where were you? I thought you were gone for ever.

ESTRAGON:

They're coming!

VLADIMIR:

Who?

ESTRAGON:

I don't know.

VLADIMIR:

How many?

ESTRAGON:

I don't know.

VLADIMIR:

(
triumphantly
)
.
It's Godot! At last! Gogo! It's Godot! We're saved! Let's go and meet him! (
He drags Estragon towards the wings. Estragon resists, pulls himself free, exit right.
) Gogo! Come back! (
Vladimir runs to extreme left, scans the horizon. Enter
Estragon right, he hastens towards Vladimir, falls into his arms.
) There you are again again!

ESTRAGON:

I'm in hell!

VLADIMIR:

Where were you?

ESTRAGON:

They're coming there too!

VLADIMIR:

We're surrounded! (
Estragon makes a rush towards back.
) Imbecile! There's no way out there. (
He takes Estragon by the arm and drags him towards front. Gesture towards front.
) There! Not a soul in sight! Off you go! Quick! (
He pushes Estragon
towards auditorium. Estragon recoils in horror.
) You won't? (
He contemplates auditorium.
) Well I can understand that. Wait till I see. (
He reflects.
) Your only hope left is to disappear.

ESTRAGON:

Where?

VLADIMIR:

Behind the tree. (
Estragon hesitates.
) Quick! Behind the tree. (
Estragon goes and crouches behind the tree, realizes he is not hidden, comes out from behind the tree.
) Decidedly this tree will not have been the slightest use to us.

ESTRAGON:

(
calmer
)
.
I lost my head. Forgive me. It won't happen again. Tell me what to do.

VLADIMIR:

There's nothing to do.

ESTRAGON:

You go and stand there. (
He draws Vladimir to extreme right and places him with his back to the stage.
) There, don't move, and watch out. (
Vladimir scans horizon, screening his eyes with his hand. Estragon runs and takes up same position extreme left.

They turn their heads and look at each other.
) Back to back like in the good old days. (
They continue to look at each other for a moment, then resume their watch. Long silence.
) Do you see anything coming?

VLADIMIR:

(
turning his head
)
.
What?

ESTRAGON:

(
louder
)
.
Do you see anything coming?

VLADIMIR:

No.

ESTRAGON:

Nor I.

They resume their watch. Silence.

VLADIMIR:

You must have had a vision.

ESTRAGON:

(
turning his head
)
.
What?

VLADIMIR:

(
louder
)
.
You must have had a vision.

ESTRAGON:

No need to shout!

They resume their watch. Silence.

VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON:

(
turning simultaneously
)
.
Do you—

VLADIMIR:

Oh pardon!

ESTRAGON:

Carry on.

VLADIMIR:

No no, after you.

ESTRAGON:

No no, you first.

VLADIMIR:

I interrupted you.

ESTRAGON:

On the contrary.

They glare at each other angrily.

VLADIMIR:

Ceremonious ape!

ESTRAGON:

Punctilious pig!

VLADIMIR:

Finish your phrase, I tell you!

ESTRAGON:

Finish your own!

Silence. They draw closer, halt.

VLADIMIR:

Moron!

ESTRAGON:

That's the idea, let's abuse each other.

They turn, move apart, turn again and face each other.

VLADIMIR:

Moron!

ESTRAGON:

Vermin!

VLADIMIR:

Abortion!

ESTRAGON:

Morpion!

VLADIMIR:

Sewer-rat!

ESTRAGON:

Curate!

VLADIMIR:

Cretin!

ESTRAGON:

(
with finality
)
.
Crritic!

VLADIMIR:

Oh!

He wilts, vanquished, and turns away.

ESTRAGON:

Now let's make it up.

VLADIMIR:

Gogo!

ESTRAGON:

Didi!

VLADIMIR:

Your hand!

ESTRAGON:

Take it!

VLADIMIR:

Come to my arms!

ESTRAGON:

Yours arms?

VLADIMIR:

My breast!

ESTRAGON:

Off we go!

They embrace. #

They separate. Silence.

VLADIMIR:

How time flies when one has fun!

Silence.

ESTRAGON:

What do we do now?

VLADIMIR:

While waiting.

ESTRAGON:

While waiting.

Silence.

VLADIMIR:

We could do our exercises.

ESTRAGON:

Our movements.

VLADIMIR:

Our elevations.

ESTRAGON:

Our relaxations.

VLADIMIR:

Our elongations.

ESTRAGON:

Our relaxations.

VLADIMIR:

To warm us up.

ESTRAGON:

To calm us down.

VLADIMIR:

Off we go.

Vladimir hops from one foot to the other. Estragon imitates him.

ESTRAGON:

(
stopping
)
.
That's enough. I'm tired.

VLADIMIR:

(
stopping
)
.
We're not in form. What about a little deep breathing?

ESTRAGON:

I'm tired breathing.

VLADIMIR:

You're right. (
Pause.
) Let's just do the tree, for the balance.

ESTRAGON:

The tree?

Vladimir does the tree, staggering about on one leg.

VLADIMIR:

(
stopping
)
.
Your turn.