Turning Tides (23 page)

Chapter 23

Sera wasn’t the only one
unhappy with my plan.

“What if you need help?” My mother asked. She and Grams had been waiting for us when we arrived at the houseboat, likely to ask this very question.

“Reclaiming my own magic? What can you do?”

They had no answer, because there wasn’t one. This was between me and Mac.

“I’ll be surrounded by water,” I reminded her. “There is no better way to do this.”

I left Sera, my mother, and Grams on the beach and kicked everyone else off the houseboat. When it was just me and Mac, I started the engine and headed toward open water.

Mac took over the steering, and I moved to the stern to watch the shore recede. My mother and Sera stood side by side, wearing matching expressions of concern. Grams stood only a few feet away, her eyes closed. The boat picked up speed, and I knew it was her work. I needed to spare my energy for what I was about to do, and this was her silent way of helping.

Simon and Miriam stood separate from everyone else, the invisible dividing line between the shifters and elementals firmly in place. For once, Miriam didn’t look like she was on the verge of bursting into laughter. Even Simon looked concerned.

I raised a single hand to them. None of us knew if this would work. We didn’t know the potential side effects. This wasn’t the sort of thing that came with its own WebMD page.

The only way we’d know for sure was to try it.

I walked through the boat, returning to Mac and leaving the people on the shore behind.

It didn’t take long for the island to fade from view, though I waited until we’d traveled another quarter mile before dropping anchor. There were no other islands in sight, no other boats. It was just me, Mac, and the dark sea as far as the eye could reach.

“How do we do this?” He looked around the boat, which felt smaller with him in it.

“I have no idea.” I closed my eyes and took several slow breaths, refusing to let the panic rise. “The last time I worked on you, you were dead. There wasn’t much risk of making it worse.”

He smiled, and it held so much trust my legs practically buckled from the sight. “Whatever else is going on, my life has only improved since you entered it, Aidan. That’s not going to change tonight.”

“Except for the part where I made you an enormous freak dependent on my magic?” I kept my voice light, trying to turn it into a joke.

“Small inconvenience,” he answered in the same tone, though his eyes were somber.

It seemed we’d made a wordless agreement not to discuss my revelations of the night before, lest they distract me from the task at hand.

I pointed to the bedroom. “You should lie down.”

“I’m starting to think you’re just looking for an opportunity to get me in bed.”

“If it helps, I’ll be joining you.”

Mac backed into the bedroom with a couple of long strides. He fell on the bed, stretching out and practically filling the entire mattress.

“Take your shirt off.”

“Not that I’m complaining, but you know ‘Sexual Healing’ is a song, not a how-to manual?”

I made a face. “You’re feeling mighty sure of yourself. I have to send my magic through your skin, and it will be easier if there aren’t clothes in the way.”

He removed his top without another word. His hands dropped to the button on his jeans and he looked at me.

“Might as well. Wait. No.” His expression turned quizzical. “No underwear, remember?”

“Is that a problem?” His voice was far too innocent.

“You want me to keep my focus, I suggest you leave the pants on.” The smile turned into an outright grin. I was glad to see he found my rampant lust amusing. “Scoot over a bit.” He moved to the edge of the double bed, creating enough space for me to lie on my side next to him.

I raised up on my elbow and looked down at him. “You know I’m making this up as I go along, right? I’m just relying on instinct.”

“I’ve always found that’s the best strategy in bed.”

“Mind out of the gutter, MacMahon. This is some highfalutin magic stuff I’m doing here. Take it seriously.”

He gave a heavy sigh, but at last he closed his eyes and let the teasing expression fall away. I was sad to see it go, both because I could never get enough of playful Mac and because it meant it was time to begin.

“Do you remember anything from the last time?”

He cracked one eye open. “You mean when I was dead?”

That sounded like a no. “I’m going to send my magic into you, thread it through your body and look for what got left behind. If all goes well, the magic I left inside you will recognize its source and return willingly. Its natural state is to be together. It should want to be whole.”

“And if it doesn’t go well?”

“I could make it worse. I could end up leaving even more inside you, though I doubt that will happen. Last time, I think it stayed behind to continue healing you. I mean, you were dead. That’s going to require more than the magical equivalent of two aspirin and a good night’s sleep.”

He studied me. “We have to take the risk, don’t we?”

We both knew the answer. “I only plan to access the water side, but it may not be enough. The fire might come out. If something goes wrong, don’t hesitate to dump me over the side of the boat.”

I placed my fingers over his lips when he began to protest. “The water can’t hurt me. I can’t drown. You know this. But the water
will
help dampen the fire’s power and keep that side of my magic from gaining a hold. I mean it. Promise me you won’t let the fire claim me. If it comes to it, you can’t hesitate.”

It took him a long moment. It went completely against his nature to chuck a woman over the side of a boat and watch her sink.

“I promise I’ll throw you over the boat if the fire shows up,” he grumbled.

“Now can you say it like you mean it?”

He groaned, but at last he gave a single nod. “I promise I won’t let the fire take you,” he repeated, and this time the words were measured and honest, if still reluctant.

I had to trust he meant it.

“You’ll feel it, as my magic moves through your body. You can talk to me if you want, but try not to make any large movements.”

In answer, he closed his eyes again and let his body relax. His legs turned out, feet dropping to the sides, and his hands unclenched.

I called to the magic in my core, finding the water eager and strong. It had fed well these last few days, and it was sated on the canals and the sea. It flowed from me, its movement effortless and sure.

I let it rest on top of Mac’s skin, covering his chest. I made no effort to send it through his skin, not yet. This should be a slow assimilation, not an invasion.

“It’s warm,” he said. “I didn’t expect that.”

I stretched it out, covering his shoulders and arms, moving up to his collarbone. “It could be a bit uncomfortable. Sure you don’t want to be knocked out first?” He opened one eye, but that was all he needed to convey his scorn for that idea. “Fucking man,” I muttered. “You probably don’t take painkillers either, do you?”

His small smile told me I’d guessed correctly.

I let the magic drift into his body, passing the first layer of skin. Mac gasped once, but that was his only reaction. Once he relaxed, I allowed it to sink further, becoming part of him.

Inch by inch, I explored his body, this time from the inside. I kept my eyes closed, wanting as few distractions as possible.

I moved with great caution. It was terrifying, how much power Mac had given me. It would be so easy to take control, to speed or slow the flow of blood, to destroy cells vital to survival.

Every doctor knew this truth, how close healing was to destruction. They were opposite sides of the same coin, and with each slow exploration, I made the choice, again and again, to heal rather than harm.

Mac’s breathing grew deep and steady. “You still with me?” I whispered. I couldn’t believe he’d fallen asleep.

“I’m here.” The words came out on a breath. “I can feel you everywhere.” I heard no fear. If anything, it sounded more like awe.

“Me too.” It wasn’t just the magic, though by now it had spread throughout his torso and into his legs. The length of his body was pressed against mine, and his shoulder was warm where my cheek rested against his skin. I felt the lines between us blurring, our two distinct forms melding together. Flesh and blood. Body and spirit.

It felt like I’d finally found the place I belonged. I never wanted to move. I never wanted to feel separate from him again.

I inhaled sharply, squashing that thought. I had to want my magic to return to me, want it with no reservations. I needed to believe in my very core that Mac and I must exist as two separate beings.

No doubts. No uncertainty. It was the only way I’d free him.

The magic moved again, winding its way past arteries and bones and organs. There was a tiny tug, a glimmer of recognition. I forced myself to keep the movement steady as I inched toward Mac’s magic source.

It was in the center of his body, as mine was. I let my magic gather there, sliding away from his arms and legs until it pooled in his core. He shook once, an involuntary shudder caused by holding more magic than his body was built to handle. I rested my hand on his chest, above his heart, and waited for him to still before I continued.

I had no difficulty finding the water magic I’d given him, as familiar to me as my own voice. It leapt in greeting, recognizing its source, and the water swirled around each other, rejoicing.

There was another magic, one I’d come to know too well.

I’d used the water magic to find what I needed. I recalled it, offering it gratitude, though it hadn’t completed its job. It hadn’t yet reclaimed its missing pieces from Mac.

That could wait. My first priority was the more dangerous fire, and I tapped into it as soon as the water quieted.

The fire was slower, more willful. It refused to make it easy for me. Hesitantly, I touched the magic that resided in my core, asking it to find and reclaim the forgotten bits of fire.

Without any anger to fuel it, it responded sluggishly, but it woke at last, crackling and hissing with pleasure as it was granted release.

I practiced every meditation technique I’d ever learned and a few I made up, demanding my body remain calm. This time, I would control the fire, not the other way around.

I kept my breathing regular, my attention on Mac. I was aware of nothing but the magic, his and mine, and the way it danced together. I’d been right. It wanted to be whole.

I fought against the exhilaration that came with the knowledge I could do this. I couldn’t lose focus, not yet.

Even so, my lips curved in a smile as the magic bonded to itself. The lost threads were downright giddy, happy to return now that its healing work was done.

I couldn’t rush, not yet. I whispered to the fire, calling it back. If I could just remove the most unstable magic from Mac, there should be no more surprises.

The fire laughed.

I gritted my teeth and tried again, giving the fire an order rather than a suggestion. It grumbled, but this time it returned to me.

It seemed to have fought me just for the joy of the fight, as it didn’t really want to be in Mac’s body. I could feel its pleasure as it returned to me and settled back in my core.

It hit me, then, a simple fact I should have recognized months ago. To me, the fire was an intruder. I resented it, even despised it for what it would someday do to me.

To the fire, I was its home. It belonged to me. In its way, it loved me as much as the water magic did.

Mac felt me pause at the long-delayed realization. “Aidan?”

“Shh. We’re almost finished.” I sent the water back, seeking the lost pieces of magic it neglected to retrieve the first time. I gave them time to bond again, then I reached for that last invisible cord and called the water to me.

It didn’t budge.

I tried again, a little harder, and then harder still, more than I was comfortable with. This wasn’t an operation that could succeed with brute force.

Nothing. I still controlled my own water magic, but the bits that had been inside Mac for the last several weeks weren’t moving.

If anything, it felt like they were digging in their heels.

I opened my eyes, fighting for control. This time, it had nothing to do with my fire side. It was the sort of good old-fashioned panic one feels when they don’t know what to do.

“Does it hurt?”

“I can take it.” He spoke in a whisper, and the words held a tension they’d lacked before.

I almost stopped right then. I could say I tried. No one would blame me, and I wouldn’t cause Mac more pain.

Except he’d be trapped with a woman who couldn’t control her own magic, let alone his, for the rest of his life.

If the direct approach wasn’t working, I needed a different strategy. Rather than tugging again on the magic locked in Mac’s core, I looked for the block. It didn’t take long to find. The water magic wasn’t alone.

Surrounding it was an unfamiliar power, one that felt wild and pure and demanding.

His shifter magic.

I pulled again, this time paying attention to how the other power responded. As I tugged on my magic, Mac’s tightened, creating a trap the water couldn’t escape.

Chaotic and difficult to understand, my mother had said. She hadn’t understated the matter. I felt the bear’s eager hunger, and I had no idea how to convince it to release the water remnants from Mac’s body.

This was taking too long. It was too much time for my magic to be inside Mac, too much time for something to go wrong. Already, I was feeling my energy falter, just a bit. It would take only one distraction, one slip, and I could kill him.

I spared no time to consider my choice. There was one remaining option, and I wouldn’t take the time to debate its merits. Self-doubt and fear would only create unnecessary delays.

I remembered Trent Pond, stuck in the mental hospital in Eureka, able to manipulate water and ice together. I thought of Brian, grinning as he lifted soil with one hand and drew ice from the air with the other. Accessing both magics at the same time required more concentration than one person could manage. Based on the little I’d seen, the only way to do it was to fracture into two selves, to abandon the sense of oneself as a whole, complete being. I’d done it once before, when I’d healed Mac, and it had changed me. I was still discovering how much.