Trust (33 page)

By
the time we wake the next morning
it’s
almost noon.  Chase heads to the shower
and I pick up my phone to check my messages.  There are a few texts from
Harrison.  He's
asking how I'm doing, if I want to
get together for coffee.  He heard about Evelyn and wants to know if I'm okay.

Of
course, he has no idea I'm in Vegas, and still doesn't know about Chase. 
There’s
really no reason for me to keep things
from him anymore.
  It's been long enough, and I owe
him some truth.  As shitty as I think it was for him to wager our relationship,
Harry's main problem is gambling.  People say
it’s
an illness.  Maybe I can forgive him
now that I've moved on.  Maybe he
couldn’t
help himse
lf,
and I've been too hard on him.  Not that it means I want to be in a
relationship with someone like that, but after the ups and downs I've had with
Chase and the understanding I have now, that each lie, half-truth or omission
can't be judged the same an
d there are always two
sides to everything, it might be time to give Harry a break.

Besides,
with Evelyn gone now, once I go back home I don't have a lot of people to talk
to.  Other than Harry and my parents, all of my other friends fall more on the
acqu
aintance spectrum.  I guess if I spent more time
with some they would become friends, but as of now, going right back would be
pretty lonely.  Maybe I
Shouldn’t
shut Harry out completely.  I still don't know what I'm
going to do with myself now that my roo
mmate
’
s gone and I have no job.

I
notice I also have a voicemail from Evelyn.  I listen but
it’s
just a quick hello from her to say that
she is settling in and leaving me her new number.  I immediately call her back,
anxious to connect with my best friend
again.

"Hey
you," I say as she answers the phone.

"Lila! 
Are you still half way around the world?"  She sounds happy and full of
energy, but that's always been Evelyn.

"Nope. 
I'm in the same country as you, actually.  Back in Vegas with Chase."

"How
are things?  Still going strong?  You patch everything
up?"

For
a moment I wonder how she knew about what happened yesterday but then I realize
s
he’s
referring to what happened back in
Toronto after the house incident.  Either way, the answer is the same
but still reminds me how quick I am to judge.  I really
should reconnect with Harry.  I've ignored him for long enough.

"Yes. 
Things are good.  Great, even."

"I'm
so happy to hear that Lila.  Chase seems like an awesome guy."

"He
really is, Eve.  What
about you?  How's the new
job?"

"Busy! 
Already I'm swamped but
it’s
actually pretty great.  I'm enjoying it so far.  But
Edward keeps me on my toes.  I'm at the office more than home so I haven't even
had a chance to unpack anything yet."

"Edward?"

Ev
e giggles nervously.  "Sorry, that's my boss, Mr.
Stonewall.  He has me call him Edward."

"Uh
huh.  What's going on over there?  Are you two...?"

"No! 
I mean... not really.  I don't know.  He's very handsome and refined.  Not what
I'm used to at all.  V
ery strict and business like at
the office.  Some people think
he’s
a complete ass.  But
he’s
not like that with me.  I don't know. 
Shit, I gotta run actually.  He just texted me."

Chase
emerges from the bathroom just as we're saying goodbye and promisin
g to keep in touch.  I wonder whether or not I should stop
over in Chicago on my way back to Toronto, whenever that ends up being.

"Eve
seems happy.  I think she has a crush on her new boss."

Chase
smiles.  "Lucky man then.  S
he’s
a nice girl."

"Yeah,"
I sigh, already starting to miss her.

"Listen,
Lila..." Chase approaches from the bathroom.  He's wrapped in a towel but
he sits down on the edge of the bed next to me.  "We haven't had a chance
to really talk yet, but I wanted to apologize for not tellin
g you about Mirana.  I wanted to.  Especially after...
after the thing with the house and Denise.  We had that talk and I know that
you were hurt by the fact that I wasn't honest, but-"

"It's
okay," I interrupt him.

He's
peering into my soul again, his b
lue eyes burning
into mine as he looks for something.  He's probably trying to tell if it really
is okay.

"Are
you sure?"

"I
should have trusted you, Chase.  I should know by now that if you're keeping
something from me
there’s
a really good reason.  I
s
houldn’t
have assumed you were automatically
trying to fool me.  You're not..." I trail off, but he picks up my
thought.

"Harrison?"

I
shrug.  "Maybe I've been too hard on him, too.  He has a gambling problem
and although I don't want to date someone lik
e that,
I don't think that makes him a bad guy.  He got carried away at the table with
you, sure, but he was probably just excited about playing against the famous
Chase Anderson.  Probably figured it would be a big story to tell if he won,
and as usual di
dn't even consider what would happen
if he lost."

"He's
an asshole, Lila.  Don't fool yourself into thinking otherwise."

"Why?" 
For some reason every time Chase puts down Harrison it bugs me and makes me
rush to his defense.  "I agree, he did a shitty t
hing
and he lied a lot, but just about his gambling.   Beyond that he wasn't that
bad."

Chase
is just shaking his head.  "Just forget him, Lila.  Trust me."

"Why? 
Because you know gamblers?  The only difference between you and him is that
you're a bette
r poker player.  If you were shitty at
it, you
wouldn’t
be called the famous Chase Anderson, you'd be called Chase
Anderson, the addict."

"No,
it’s
not that.  He's just...
he’s
not a nice guy, Lila."

"You
barely know him.  You played with him for what, a
few
hours? 
I’ve
known him for close to a year.  And might I remind you
that the whole wager for me was your fucking idea in the first place.  You
basically led him into it.  I'm sure he never would have thought of that on his
own.  Of course he should ha
ve said no fucking way
and punched your lights out, but still, who does that?  Who asks a guy to give
up his girlfriend in a poker game?"  The truth is, I've wanted an answer
to that question since the day we met.  It has always bothered me that Chase
sugg
ested it, and the more that I've gotten to know
him, the more out of character it seems.

Chase's
lips are a thin line and turning white
he’s
pursing them so hard.  It's as if
he’s
holding something back.  "I
explained that to you the first night," he fina
lly
says.

"Right,
you took a chance and he didn't value me, yada yada.  What aren't you telling
me?  What made you think he didn't value me in the first place?  Why do you
have such a low opinion of Harrison after just playing cards with him for a few
hou
rs?  I know you're a fantastic judge of character,
Chase, but even for you that borders a little too much on the side of mystical
mumbo jumbo.  Are you a mind reader, Chase?  Is that it?"

"No."

"Then
what?"

"Why
does it matter?  You guys are broken up.
 Let's just
drop it, okay?"

"No,
I don't want to drop it.  Practically every time I bring Harry's name up you
have something negative to say and all you know about him is he took the bait
when you offered to play for me that first night after he'd lost a
lot of money to you.  I think lawyers call that
entrapment.  And you know what, Chase?  You're the last person to be so
judgmental about exes.  Not when you have Denise trying to break us up every
fucking five minutes."

Chase
lets out a long sigh.  "I did
n't just play with
him for a couple of hours the night we met..."

"What? 
What do you mean?"

"Harrison
came down to the poker room the night before.  It was late."

That
wasn't a big surprise.  I suspected as much.  Harry lost money our first night
a
nd then I convinced him to stop and come to bed. 
But I woke in the middle of the night and he wasn't next to me.  I had hoped he
had just gone to the bathroom or something, but then I fell back asleep waiting
for him to return.  The next morning he was be
side
me, but I had a suspicion that he had gone back down to play.  "So you
played with him the night before as well?"

"Yes. 
We played for a little while and he lost some money.  We talked a bit.  He said
he was in town with his girlfriend for a few days
. 
Then he lost some more and said he needed to take a break."

"And
then?" 
There’s
clearly more to the story despite the
fact that Chase stopped.  He's looking at me strangely now, and he clearly
isn't comfortable continuing but after I glare at him he f
inally does.

"He
started talking to some women."

Now
I'm staring even harder and I can feel my own lips press into a line.  I nod
for him to continue.

"They
were... I know them.  Not personally, but... they work... out of the
hotel."

It
takes me a minu
te but then I clue in.  "They
were hookers?"

Chase
nods slightly.  "Harrison left with them.  He was gone for a while, but
when he returned he sat back down to play again."

"Did
he say anything else?"

"Eventually,
yes.  He started talking to some other
guy at the
table and the two of them began having a few drinks.  Not long after that he
began bragging to his new friend about how he left with those women and had sex
with them both.  Together."

All
of a sudden I feel dizzy and sick.

Chase
stands up and
moves closer to me.  "Are you
okay?  I didn't want to tell you..."

"I
wanted to know.  It's not your fault.  I just..."  I never suspected
that.  I never would have guessed.  But now that
he’s
told me I know immediately that
it’s
true.

"So
you offered t
o play for me... to break us up?"

"I
didn't know what he would say if I made that offer, but I had a feeling he
would agree.  It wasn't really my place to tell you what happened, and you
didn't know me anyway so I didn't know if you would believe me.  But
I thought that if I made a proposition like that and he
took it, you might see him for the type of person he was."

"Why
didn't you tell me?  I mean after?"

"I
don't know.  I thought Harrison was in your past and so it didn't matter.  I
didn't see the up
side to telling you.  I just thought
it would hurt you to know and since you weren't planning on going back to him,
I figured there was no point in putting you through that."

I
close my eyes as I let it all sink in.  It's only because
we’ve
been broken up
for a couple weeks now that this news doesn't completely devastate me.

And
although
it’s
another secret that Chase has been
keeping from me,
it’s
also another one that I can't even fault him for.  He was
saving me from mistakes of my past both that I've
made
and that were made against me. 
There’s
no doubt now.  Harrison was a mistake. 
But Chase helped fix that before I even really knew him.

When
I open my eyes
he’s
looking at me and the concern on his face is obvious.

"Every
time I question you, it se
ems like I'm the one making
the mistake," I say. 

Chase
chuckles softly.  "Don't worry, I've made my share of them as well."

"I
don't even know what to do with myself now, Chase.  I have nothing waiting for
me back home.  Eve is gone, Harry is a complet
e ass. 
I have no job, no plan."

"You
have me."

I
shrug and smile.  "I know.  And I appreciate that.  But your life is
here.  My life is... well, I guess my life isn't in Toronto anymore.  But I'm
not going to just sponge off of you for the rest of my li
fe. 
That’s
not who I am, Chase."

"I
know," he agrees, nodding. "Which is one of many things I love about
you.  You aren't after my money or my fame.  That much has always been clear
and
it’s
a big relief.  If I wanted that, I'd
have stayed with Denise. 
Vegas is full of women like
that."

"So
what do we do?  What do I do?"

"Well,
I had some thoughts about that."  Chase leans away from me now, using one
of his muscled arms to prop his body against the bed.  "My foundation is
still in the early stages, and
although I'm not bad
at organizing poker players and their donations, I'm learning that I'm not that
great at setting up the actual foundation - securing the space, hiring staff,
etc.  I could use someone to do all that.  Someone that might have experienc
e in the non-profit industry."

I
raise my eyebrow at him.  "Wait, what about Mirana?  I thought she was
going to run the thing?"

"When
it’s
up and running, yes.  But putting the
whole thing together is beyond her as well, and in between raising Diego and
volunteering at the shelter, something she needs to
continue to do to get the experience she needs to run things eventually, she
doesn't have the time to do it anyway.  I need someone who can make it their
focus. 
There’s
money in the budget to hire someo
ne,
I just hadn't gotten to it yet.  And a job offer like this would certainly come
with a work visa so that you can stick around for as long as it takes."

"I...
I don't know..."

"And
I also know of a really nice house that will be vacated very soon that
you can stay in.  The rent is super cheap.  Almost
non-existent..."

"Almost?"

"Well,
you certainly
wouldn’t
have to pay in cash, anyway.  I hear the owner is willing
to accept all sorts of methods of payment."

"Oh
really?"

"Well,
not for just anyone o
f course.  There is a very
strict screening process."

"Go
on..."

"For
security, it might require a strip search, to start."

"Uh
huh..."

"In
fact, it might be a good idea to start the process now.  It can be quite
lengthy and... in depth."

"Well,
I'm p
retty busy at the moment but I might be able
to... squeeze you in."

We
both laugh and fall against the bed as his lips brush against mine. 

"Are
you okay then?" he asks, pulling away for a moment to look at me with his
deep blue eyes one more time. 

"
Yes," I whisper.  My head tilts forward until I
’
m close enough to feel his breath
against my lips.  "Because of you, I think I finally am.
”