Authors: Manuela Pigna
“Excuse
me!” I hear a male voice. I look up at two beautiful brown eyes. It’s
Sebastiano, a friend of the twins’ that I’ve encountered a few times at their
house.
“It’s
nothing…” I mumble under my breath.
Sebastiano
looks at me in silence for two seconds and then says with surprise, “Olly?”
“Yes?”
“Olly?!”
“Yes?!”
“Wow…”
He says, starting to smile. “I barely recognized you…”
I
nod, mostly because I don’t know how to respond.
Seba,
smiling, nods too.
We
stay there standing in silence, one in front of the other, mildly embarrassed.
“Well,”
I point in the direction behind him with my now half-empty glass. “I was going
to the bathroom… and…”
Seba
nods again more vigorously. Then, as though illuminated by an idea, he takes
the glass from my hand and looks at it. “But you’ve got almost nothing left… I’ll
get it for you while you go to the bathroom, what was it?”
He’ll
get me something to drink while I’m in the bathroom?
Huh?
“Ah,
a Campari-orange,” I answer a little awkwardly.
He
takes my empty glass from my hands and goes without thinking twice. I look at
his retreating back for a second, a little confused, and then turn in the
direction of the bathroom.
When
I come out I find Seba already ready with two cocktails in hand. We begin to
talk about this and that and end up challenging each other to foosball because
he doesn’t believe I’m good at it. When we go down to the game room, we find it
already occupied by two boys playing. We introduce ourselves and begin to play
in couples, then singles, having a sort of tournament. I am winning, as always,
when Nic and Andrea come in.
“I
knew it…” Murmurs Nic.
Nic
and Andrea watch the end of my game and, when it’s finished, someone challenges
me to play pool so we all pass over to the other game table.
At
a certain point Seba says, “You’re the champion of foosball, beautiful, nice and
play pool too? Will you marry me?”
I
laugh replying, “Look out, if you say it again I’ll take it seriously…”
And
I can’t believe it. I can’t believe that this is me flirting at a party with a
boy and wearing a beautiful dress! Ok, a dress all full of stains, but still
beautiful.
It
seems like we’ve been playing for a long time when, almost without realizing
it, the game room has emptied and I find myself playing pool alone with Andrea
- Nic returned to the model-pharmacist a while back, the other two have gone to
get drinks and Seba, after getting a phone call and being able to hear one word
out of twenty, has gone upstairs to call back.
Now
it’s so quiet in here… until Andrea breaks the silence asking, “Are you having
fun?”
“Lots
of fun!” I answer smiling at the colored ball I’m about to hit.
He
doesn’t speak until it’s his turn to play and, once he’s stretched across the
table, says, “You know that one of these three will want something more than a
couple of cute jokes before the end of the evening…”
“Ah,”
I answer without giving away anything. “Well, we’ll see.”
“We’ll
see what?”
“We’ll
see if what you said happens.”
“And
if it happens?” He asks, still playing.
“If
it happens… I don’t know. I’ll decide at the time what to do.”
He
gets up, his mouth a little open with surprise and leans on the edge of the
table with the pool-cue resting on the floor. “Do you mean…”
“I
don’t know Andrea! I don’t think about these things and I certainly don’t
decide beforehand! Anyway, it’s not even sure anything will happen…”
“Yeah,
sure, great… it’ll happen alright… then don’t say that I didn’t warn you.” He
says, seeming to be in a bad mood.
I
decide to ignore him and we continue to play in silence until Nic bursts into
the room. “Olly!”
I
turn around because I’m the one with my back to the door, while Andrea
straightens up on the other side of the table. He was shooting.
“Now
I can tell you that thing!” Nic exclaims coming closer and placing himself in
front of me.
“Oh,
good!” In the meantime, out of the corner of my eye, I see Andrea come around
the table and stand behind me.
“I
didn’t want to tell you before, because I wasn’t sure… anyway… okay. Gianca is
here.”
I
straighten up instinctively and at the same time feel a hand run slowly along
my right side and stay there.
Nic
quickly lowers his eyes, registers the hand, but doesn’t comment. When he looks
up, he stares in my eyes and continues, “I invited him just for you, but I
wasn’t sure he’d come and I didn’t want to tell you if afterwards he didn’t
show up…”
“Really?”
I answer with a little hop in place – with the hand still in place – clapping
my hands. “But... you said he wasn’t right for me…”
Nic
crosses his arms over his chest, smiling. “And in fact he isn’t, but if you’re
conscious that he isn’t, a little
summer activity
could only do you
good,” he concludes with a wink.
I
hug him on impulse. “Oh Nic, you’re a friend!”
“Yeah,
a great friend…” Mutters Andrea, letting go of my side and coming into my field
of vision. He stops with his arms crossed and observes us. You can see he wants
to say something, but he doesn’t speak.
Neither
of us answer him. I let go of Nic, clapping again, then I stop. Suddenly struck
by a thought. “It’s just that…” I bite my lower lip. “Now what do I do? I’m not
very experienced in these things…”
Andrea
makes a face, as though scornful. “
What do I have to do
?” He even mimics
me. “As soon as he sees you he’ll jump on you. Rest easy.”
Nic
and I turn to him open-mouthed, only for a second, both of us a little
surprised by this remark that ought to be a compliment, if it weren’t said in
such a decidedly unpleasant tone. Then we turn to each other again without
answering Andrea directly. “Now come with me, let’s go for a walk. I’ll go to
say hi to him and you float in discreetly…”
“Perfect!”
I exclaim.
“This
isn’t at all perfect!” Andrea interrupts. “For me this isn’t a good idea. We
said that he wasn’t right…”
“If
I have to wait for someone who’s right Andrea, I’ll be just in time to drop
dead!” I answer a little acidly, then I push him aside lightly and go towards
the door.
“No,
Olly wait! Let me say something for a second…” Says Andrea at my back, but
almost immediately I hear Nic answer for me as I open the door, “Excuse me if I
tell you something Andre, you’re not her father and… not her boyfriend either.
So… leave her alone.”
20.
Nic’s
plan is working perfectly. It’s been about a half-hour that I’ve been speaking
with Giancarlo. Up to now it seems to be going really well. Initially, when Nic
brought me over to him and told him that we already knew each other, he
answered, “Impossible, I’d have remembered!”, and it seemed like a positive
response to me. Then we chatted for a little in general and two seconds ago he
went as far as inviting me for a weekend abroad with him. It wasn’t really a
specific invitation, it went like this: I asked him what sport he does in the
summer having to put aside snowboarding for a few months and he answered that
he surfs. I asked him where he could surf in Italy and he said that he
sometimes goes to Tuscany but frequently to Portugal because there are good
waves and it’s not too expensive. And it was at this point that he added,
“Maybe sometime you’ll come too.” I answered, “I wish.” But thinking about it,
I believe that it was just something thrown out there, just to make
conversation.
I
was really good, because the whole time I didn’t turn around even once to see
where Andrea was – if he was with Tiziana the babe, if he had left or if he was
still in the game room. I managed to concentrate on the person in front of me
without problems. Really. Nic told him to leave me alone and he did what a
close friend advised him to do. Moreover, I’m living exactly what I started all
this for. I’m here, after months, in front of Gianca. And he is giving me all
his attention. He doesn’t seem to be in love with anyone else, in fact he’s
here on his own, differently from certain people I know. Free - to be able to
fall in love with me. Exactly as I had asked fate a long time ago. I’m living
my dream and I really am very happy. My heart isn’t beating hard because serenity
and happiness are like that. They’re positive, intelligent feelings which keep
your pulse at the right level for the cardiac muscle. Not like anger or
agitation – those do make your heart pound. Heavens, I need a break from my
crap. I’ll take it while I go to the bathroom
.
On the route to reach the toilet I absolutely will
not look around. I won’t do it. I’ll go and come back here to Gianca and for
the entire time I’ll look at the ground in front of my feet and that’s it.
Conversing,
Gianca and I moved into the yard. For a while we were standing and to avoid
sinking into the ground even more, I took off my sandals. Afterwards we moved
to a little table far enough outside to be free and we stayed a little ways
away in this romantic atmosphere to speak in low voices. When I communicate my
intentions he replies, “Shall I wait for you here?”
“Sure,
I’ll be right back.”
Since
I have to cross all of the yard, I Ieave my sandals there, near him, and I walk
barefoot. We’re in the twins’ house, not out in public… And then I noticed a
few other girls do the same.
Once
I’m alone in the bathroom, I do what I have to do sighing and thinking
intensely. I wash my hands looking at myself in the mirror and asking myself, why
am I not happy?
Exiting
I find Andrea in front of me.
I
have an instant, I swear it was only a second, of hesitation and surprise. It’s
my heart’s fault. It immediately starts beating so hard that I’m afraid I’ll
have a heart attack from one minute to the next. Can you have a heart attack at
twenty-five? Because maybe it’s autosuggestion, but I’m starting to feel a
small pain in my left arm…
I
quickly go to pass him with my head lowered, but he blocks me. “I have to talk
to you.”
“Not
now, someone’s waiting for me.”
“Olly!”
I
look up at his caustic tone.
“Don’t
make me lose my patience, I haven’t got a lot left.”
“Heh,”
is my only response. When he takes me by the arm I jerk away saying, “You want
to talk? Go ahead, talk. I’m listening.”
“Not
in front of the bathroom.”
“Ah
no? The young master is being difficult?”
He
glares at me, fixed, until I give in. “Okay, let’s go in the kitchen.”
“No,
there’s too much noise. Let’s go downstairs.”
He
takes me by the arm, which I immediately yank away to free myself, and we start
to descend the stairs to go to the floor of the game and cinema rooms.
“Where
are your shoes?” He asks me as we go down.
“In
a safe place,” I answer without further explanation. I don’t want to be with
him. Every minute with him is bittersweet – more bitter than sweet lately – and
I only want sweetness now.
After
having stuck his head into the game room, he quickly closes the door and moves
on to the cinema room one. He looks in without opening the door too much at
first and then opens it more and makes a sign for me to come in.
When
I turn around he is closing the door behind him.
I
won’t make it easy for him, so I cross my arms and look at him darkly without
speaking.
He
sighs and puts his hands in his pockets, taking a breath before speaking. He
scratches his nape and finally opens his mouth. “I wanted to tell you… Don’t
waste it.”
“What?”
I’ve said only one word, but have managed to fill it with aggression.
“Your
first times. Your first kiss, your first… your first everything.”
He
doesn’t have a combative attitude anymore. He has an air of sadness and almost
compassion, like a father who has already lived through many things,
everything, and tries to pass his wisdom to the young and ingenuous daughter.
And it pisses me off. “The first kiss has already gone.”
He
looks at me for a moment in surprise, straightening his head, then he says
softly, “That wasn’t a real kiss Olly.”
Which
pisses me off even more, and hurts me like a knife planted straight in the
heart.
“Fine,
you’ve said what you wanted, bye. I’m going. There’s someone waiting for me.” I
say this as I head for the door, but he follows me and places a hand against
the wood above the lock.
“Will
you do what I said?”
I
laugh. Bitterly, sarcastically. “And what exactly did you say?”
“Don’t
do anything with him.”