Three of Hearts (4 page)

“I’m okay.” My voice came out small.

Ben gave a soft laugh and hugged me tighter. “That’s what you always say.”

“But I always am okay. Right?” I tipped my head to look up at him.

“Yeah. You always are, sweetheart.”

“I just . . .” I couldn’t even go there, and say what I was so afraid of.

“What, babe?” Lucas muted the TV, rolled to his side, and turned to face us, elbow on the mattress, hand supporting his head.

I lowered my gaze to my hands clasped on my stomach and expelled a hard breath. “Nothing.” I narrowed my gaze at Lucas. “Why aren’t you with those girls?”

I sensed Ben’s body tensing at my question.

Lucas shrugged. “Not tonight.”

“Did Ben ask you to come here?”

Lucas smiled. “Yeah.”

“You didn’t have to do that.”

“You’re hurting. Of course I’m here for you. Not gonna leave you alone at a time like this.”

My chest ached. “Thank you,” I whispered. Trust Ben to be the one who took care of me. Not that Lucas didn’t. He just wasn’t as sensitive as Ben. He could come across as unemotional, but I knew Lucas did have feelings under that take-charge exterior. Unfamiliar tears once again prickled at the corners of my eyes, and I squeezed them shut briefly. “You know what? I don’t really care that much about Doug. I just feel like such a big loser.”

Ben gasped. “You are not a loser.”

“Shut the fuck up.” Lucas pushed up to sitting. Again, his way of comforting me didn’t exactly ooze tenderness. But I knew without a doubt he was sincere.

“Haylee.” Ben tipped my chin up so our eyes met. “Tonight on that stage—you were fucking on fire, you were so hot.”

I blinked at him.

“Didn’t you feel it?” Lucas asked. “You were so into the music. Putting everything you had into it . . .”

“It’s true.” Ben shifted closer as he affirmed what Lucas had said. “I could feel it. There wasn’t a person in the audience who could take their eyes off you.” He hesitated, the corners of his eyes tightening ever so slightly, his mouth lifting at one corner. “You two looked smokin’ hot together.”

He was in a better position to judge, being our back-up vocalist. I’d been so swept up in the emotion, I’d barely been aware there were people watching until the applause had exploded.

Ben lifted some hair away from my face and tucked it behind my ear. “You’re gorgeous. Mesmerizing. Sexy as fucking hell. It wasn’t only the audience who couldn’t take their eyes off you.”

I stared into Ben’s eyes, and something shifted in them and inside me.

My heart started beating faster and once again my skin tingled everywhere. The way Ben was looking at me was different, his eyes warm and intent.

I became acutely aware that we were all in a bed together. Well,
on
the bed, but still, we were all very close together, close enough that I could smell their unique fragrances, close enough to feel their body heat, close enough to touch. Lucas, Ben, and I practically lived together on the road, spending hours in that damn tour bus, and we
literally
lived together back in Nashville—as in, we shared a house. But we’d never all been on a bed together like this, with Ben gazing at me as if he wanted . . . something.

I blinked and turned my head on the pillow to peer at Lucas, who was watching Ben and me with a notch between his eyebrows. He looked from Ben to me, then back to Ben with narrowed eyes.

“He’s right.” Lucas leaned in closer, meeting my eyes. “I got hard when we were singing ‘All of You.’ When you slid your hand around the back of my neck and put your forehead against mine . . . Fuck, that was hot.”

Whoa. That was . . . bold of Lucas to tell me that.

When I’d leaned into him like that, he’d wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me up against him, and we’d moved together to the music in a slow, sensual dance, body to body. “Th-that was just part of the act.” Hearing about Lucas’s hard-on made my insides start to shiver.

He grimaced. “Yeah. I know. You’re all brokenhearted about some other guy. It wasn’t like you were really coming on to me.”

My mouth fell open. Did he
want
me to come on to him?

“I don’t think I’m really all that brokenhearted.” I sighed. “Rejection sucks, though.”

He slowly nodded. Ben’s hand cupped my shoulder, then began stroking up and down my upper arm. I glanced back at him. He gave me a nod. “Yeah. It does. But Haylee . . .”

I licked my lips, and when his gaze dropped to my mouth, my stomach did a slow, lovely roll. My eyes widened, then moved to his mouth. Which was a very attractive mouth.

This wasn’t news to me. I always knew how beautiful these guys were. Ben’s darker skin and hair contrasted Lucas’s tawny coloring. Lucas’s hair was longer and all messy on top. His nose was a bit broad and unevenly shaped, and when he smiled, deep dimples made girls go all silly. Lucas wore a heavy stubble of light-brown whiskers, Ben a short, dark beard.

I was thinking about kissing Ben’s beautiful mouth.

This should have been shocking. Maybe the alcohol made it less so. Or maybe I had to admit it wasn’t actually the first time I’d ever thought about kissing Ben. But since we’d joined up to form Three of Hearts, it had been a business relationship that had turned to friendship, and never anything more. The guys had had tons of girls, though nothing lasting, and more than their share of hookups and dates. My own love life hadn’t been so interesting until Doug had come along. Bleh.

“What?” I whispered at Ben’s unfinished sentence.

His mouth went solemn. “I kinda hate to say it, but I’m glad you’re not with him anymore.”

My eyebrows lifted. “I thought you liked him. I mean, up until today.”

He hitched one big shoulder. “Not so much.”

“Oh.”

“Me neither,” Lucas stated firmly. “Never liked him.”

Well. I wasn’t sure what to do with that. But I guess it didn’t really matter whether they liked Doug or not, since we were done.

I studied Ben’s lean, oblong face with its narrow, sculpted jaw. Sideburns tapered down into his dark beard, and thick eyelashes gave his blue eyes a very intense appearance. His T-shirt had ridden up on his abdomen, revealing a strip of tanned skin and a narrow trail of dark hair that led down into his low-rise Levis.

I swallowed. Once again, I should have been shocked that my eyes followed that trail of hair and went even lower, to the definite bulge behind the buttons. But once again, I had to admit that I’d looked there before.

In complete innocence, of course.

Heat washed down through my body. Ben continued to stroke my arm and my skin was super sensitized. An ache developed low in my belly. The air around us went electric.

Lucas lifted a hand and touched my face, so gently. His thumb brushed over my bottom lip. “Don’t understand why you think you’re not attractive, Haylee. Look at you.” His gaze dropped to my mouth, then to my breasts.

More heat suffused me. My breasts swelled and my nipples tightened, and I closed my eyes, filled with a hungry yearning. My breath came in short, shallow bursts. What was happening here? Lucas and Ben were regarding me as if they wanted to eat me up, and that was . . . exciting. No. I mean, that was wrong. We didn’t have that kind of relationship.

“What’s it like to have a threesome?” I asked.

Oh. My. God. Did I really just say that?
My face flamed.

Ben and Lucas looked at each other over me. One corner of Lucas’s mouth kicked up into that smile, and Ben’s mouth did a slow curve. Something passed between them, some unspoken message and agreement. I sank my teeth into my bottom lip.

Ben turned his hot gaze back on me. The air sizzled around us. “Wanna find out?”

My head spun. It wasn’t the alcohol. Definitely not. It was a dizzying burst of lust, along with a warm slide of desire pooling between my thighs.

I did want to find out. I really, really did. The focused attention of two guys on me, all on me, was so fucking hot. I’d never had that before, and in my current visit to Loserville it was so tempting, so . . . irresistible.

At that moment,
I
felt irresistible. Sexy. Ready to abandon myself to it, to abnegate all rational, sensible thought, to just feel and be sensual and carnal and enjoy the experience. I’d had brief glimpses of this kind of feeling in my life, but not enough. Never enough.

I closed my eyes briefly. The urge came over me, and I shouldn’t have done it, but somehow I couldn’t stop myself. I sat up and reached for the side zip of my dress. I drew it down and the snug garment loosened, the straps sliding down my arms and the bodice falling to my waist.

If the air around us had been electrified before, now it was snapping with sparks. Both guys drew in a sharp breath. For a few painful seconds, I hoped like hell I hadn’t misread their signals. If they rejected me now, I would die. I would bury myself under the duvet and never, ever come out. Okay, I’d come out, but when I did, I’d be on the next flight to Alaska.

“Jesus fuck,” Lucas breathed.

“Holy hell,” Ben said.

“Yes, I want to find out,” I whispered.

My heart pounded against my ribs, and then Ben leaned up and put his lips on my shoulder. He stayed like that for a long moment as Lucas sat back up. I met Lucas’s eyes and the smoldering heat in them had my breath stalling in my throat.

“Serious?” He held my gaze.

I nodded.

“You sure, babe?”

“I’m sure.” I was so
not
sure, but backing down now would be embarrassing. And I wanted to know what it felt like to be desired, to be the focus of two hot guys. I wanted that enough to push my doubts and worries aside and go for it.

Ben and Lucas exchanged another look and then they both moved in on me. Ben reached for my waist, while Lucas cupped my jaw in his callused hand and leaned in for a kiss.

My lips parted and clung to his, and I melted.

His mouth moved on mine, firm and warm, brushing my lips once, twice, then drawing back. His eyes met mine again. That eyebrow lifted and the opposite corner of his mouth kicked up. “Nice,” he said, his eyelids drooping, and he kissed me again. This time his mouth was harder, more demanding. His thumb exerted gentle pressure on my chin, encouraging my mouth to open too. I didn’t need much encouragement as my body softened. My mouth felt hungry for the taste of him, and our tongues slid together. Heat flowed through my veins and a knot of ache developed between my legs.

Ben’s hands held my waist from behind, and Lucas drew back. We stared at each other.

“Holy shit balls,” I breathed, my heart tapping out a rapid beat. I saw the same sentiment in Lucas’s wide eyes and parted lips, his rapid breathing.

“Fuck.” Ben lifted me up, shifting us both so I sat between his spread thighs, my back to his chest. He swept my hair aside and put his mouth on the side of my neck. Shivers cascaded over my body, along with tingling warmth. One of his hands slid around my ribcage, just below my breast, and the other curved around my neck, his fingertips brushing my throat, sliding up to my chin, and then he eased my head back to his shoulder so he, too, could find my mouth.

My mind disintegrated while my body dissolved in sensation. Thoughts fragmented, heat washed down through me as Ben’s tongue caressed mine, his fingers tightening on my ribs, my breasts swelling. One of my hands came up to cover his and my toes curled into the silky duvet.

Ben’s mouth clung to mine. He tasted different from Lucas, and his lips felt thinner, but they were both very good kissers. Better than good. Stupendously good. Then he lifted his mouth from mine and strung kisses along my jaw, over to just below my ear. Shivers spread over my skin and a moan swelled in my throat. He opened his mouth on the sensitive skin at the side of my neck and gently sucked.

I gasped as he cupped my bare breasts. That felt so good. A groan rumbled from his chest—which I took to mean that it felt good for him too—and my pussy tightened.

My eyes fluttered open although my head felt too heavy to lift from Ben’s shoulder. Lucas was in front of me, watching us with hot eyes. He tugged on my dress, which was crumpled at my waist, and helped me lift my ass off the mattress briefly so he could pull the dress down over my legs. He tossed it into a sparkly heap on the carpet, then gently parted my legs and knelt between them. His gaze roamed from Ben’s hands on my breasts, up to my face, then back down to my boy short panties, sitting low on my hipbones.

“Haylee,” he said, voice husky. “How could you possibly think you’re not sexy? Look at you.”

I blinked, and Ben’s hands gently squeezed my full breasts. My nipples throbbed against his palms. “God that feels good,” I gasped.

“Your tits are amazing,” Ben rasped beside my ear. He nuzzled my hair. “Fucking amazing.” And then his thumbs brushed down over my nipples. A hard shudder worked over my entire body. I arched my back into his touch. “So sensitive.” He stroked his thumbs back and forth over the tender tips, and a sweet ache blossomed there and spread down to my pussy.

“This is crazy,” I managed to articulate, although the words slurred.

Ben filled his hands with my breasts again. “D’you want to stop?”