Authors: Lisanne Norman
* * *
Gradually the sounds resolved themselves into voices and she realized she was awake. Automatically, she reached for Kusac and found nothing. Her eyes flew open and she pushed herself up on her good arm, looking around in fear. Then she saw Kaid standing at the foot of the bed.
"Where am I? What's happened to Kusac?" she demanded, a distant part of her mind noticing how weak her voice sounded.
"Everything's fine," Kaid said. "You were ill so I brought you to a Healer. Kusac knows all about it. He's back at the estate waiting for you. Noni wants to keep you here overnight. I'll take you back in the morning."
"Noni?" she asked as Kaid came round and helped her sit up.
"That's me, young Human," said a voice from the other side of the room.
Kaid stood aside so Carrie could see her.
Sitting at the table had to be the oldest Sholan Carrie had ever seen. The iron-gray pelt was still flecked with its original brown, but the hair, worn in a single thick plait, was snow-white in color.
"Hmpf! I'm not that old, child," Rhuna growled.
"I beg your pardon," Carrie stammered, schooling her thoughts and her expression as she realized she'd been broadcasting. "Where am I?"
"In my home," said Rhuna, turning back to the stew pot to ladle out three bowlfuls. "You may call me Noni. Tallinu, give her her stew. It's time she ate. No male likes a female who resembles a skeleton, child." She held one of the bowls out to him.
Carrie watched Kaid go over to the table to collect her meal. The rich aroma of the cooked meat drifted up to her as he returned with it and held it out to her.
"Eat," said Noni, waving her spoon in Carrie's direction. "I've done all I can for you, it's up to you now."
Her stomach growled with hunger as Kaid sat on the bed beside her.
He handed her the spoon. "I'll hold the bowl," he said.
She nodded her thanks, dipping the spoon into the thick meaty gravy, then putting it in her mouth. "Where's here?" she asked around her mouthful.
"A village near Stronghold, in the Dzahai Mountains," he said. "How do you feel?"
"Hungry," she said, shoveling in another spoonful. "In what way was I ill?"
"We couldn't get you to wake or eat," said Kaid.
"You started to sleep yourself away, child," interrupted Rhuna. "You'll have more cubs, never fear. That one was never meant to be. Ask Tallinu. He knows."
Carrie looked at Kaid, a wary expression on her face. "You told me before you knew I'd lose the baby."
His ears flicked in irritation. "I hoped you wouldn't lose her," he said.
"But you thought I would. You said you'd had a vision."
Rhuna gave a low laugh. "Go on, Tallinu. Tell her. I want to hear it, too!"
He shrugged. "I had a God-Vision," he said. "It was enigmatic, as they all are. It's only when I see events happening that I know they're part of the vision."
"You could have warned me!"
"What could I have said? I only knew it was likely your cub wouldn't survive, not how she would die."
Unusually, she could feel something of his distress at being put on the spot like this.
"Don't blame him, child," said Rhuna suddenly. "Visions can confuse more than inform you. Eat your stew, then sleep. Tomorrow Tallinu will take you home."
Carrie looked from one to the other. Kaid's mind was once again as still as usual, and Noni met hers with an amused tone to it.
Eat,
the old female sent to her.
* * *
Noni had turned in as soon as they'd finished eating. She was sleeping in the guest room, leaving Carrie her bed in the living room. Kaid had made her comfortable, then wrapped himself in a couple of blankets and lay down on the settee. The light had been left at a dim glow for her.
Carrie's sleep was restless and troubled. Gradually the gray mists that seemed to dominate her dreams these days parted and dissolved to reveal a stone hallway.
The faint noise she could hear resolved itself into a knocking at the door. As she watched, someone rushed forward to open it a crack, letting in the three figures that waited outside.
She strained to see who they were but the hallway was too dimly lit for her to see clearly. One was female, she realized as she saw a flash of amber eyes framed by a mass of thin beaded braids. The female moved forward, the beads in her hair chiming as she passed out of sight.
Her attention was drawn to the second figure— a tall, dark male who seemed somehow familiar. The light guttered as the wind from outside blew the candle flames.
"
Shut the door! We don't want to advertise ourselves,
"
said the younger male who brought up the rear.
"You got here safely?" the one who met them asked of his tall visitor. "We heard shooting."
"We're here, aren't we?"
"Patience, Rezac," said the tall one to him. "They're merely concerned. We got caught on the edges of a skirmish down in the valley."
"Did you bring the data?
"
The question was asked urgently as the group turned to walk along the echoing stone corridor.
"We brought it, and the training schedule we've worked out," said the tall one. "It's still trial and error. Few of them can do it. They're too sensitive to the pain."
"How many can?"
A silence, then, "Only one so far."
"So we've suffered for nothing. There is no answer, no help." The voice sounded hopeless.
The tall male was briefly illuminated by the candlelight. What she could see of his face was tired and worn.
"I was never looking for a solution,
"
he said. "We need to rethink our approach, that's all. If we see it as defeat, then we will lose."
"No good ever comes from playing God! We were stronger before this!"
"Enough!" said the voice she recognized as Rezac's. "You'll have us defeated before we've begun to fight!"
"Fight? What have we got left to fight with?"
"Ourselves," said Rezac, abruptly clutching his side as he stumbled against the wall. A smear of blood was left on the stone.
"You've been hit!" the female exclaimed, turning back to grasp hold of him. "That's why you blocked me out!"
"It's nothing," he said, his voice fading out as the blood began to course from beneath his hand, running down his thigh.
Someone was screaming, Carrie realized as she tried to fight her way clear of the weight that was clinging to her limbs. She had to get free!
"Carrie, stop it! Stop screaming! It's me, Kaid!" said a voice close by her ear.
"Let me go! I can smell blood!" she cried, trying to push him away with her sound arm. "We've been attacked! We have to leave!" For a wonder, the screaming had stopped.
"Carrie, you've been dreaming. It's not real," he said, tightening his grip on her. "No one's been hurt, we aren't under attack."
Gasping for breath, Carrie strained against his encircling arms. "They shot him! He's bleeding! Why is there always blood wherever I go?" Her voice had dropped to a low moan as, exhausted, she slumped against him. "Please, God, no more blood. No more fighting and hurting, I can't take any more of it," she sobbed.
"It's all right, Carrie," said Kaid awkwardly as he relaxed his hold on her. "It was a dream, nothing more."
"Ha!" said Rhuna from the doorway. "A pretty picture indeed! It's about time you let yourself feel again, Tallinu. You won't find a female who wants a male carved of ice."
"Leave me alone, Noni," he said sharply to her. "You've no call to talk to me like this."
"Hmpf!" she said, making her way into the room toward them. She reached out and put her hand on Carrie's shoulder, using it to establish a rapport with her.
"Hush, child," she said. "I know what you saw. It was a dream, nothing more. I've had that one myself a few times. The people are long gone now."
Carrie raised her head. "You've seen it, too?" she asked incredulously.
Rhuna nodded, squeezing Carrie's shoulder gently before letting go and turning to walk toward the nearest chair.
"I've seen it, as did my mother and her mother before her," she said, sitting down heavily. "It's always the same, like a storyteller's tale told over and over again."
"You haven't told me this before," said Kaid accusingly. "You know my interest in this type of dream."
"Had you stayed longer in the village before leaving for the city, you might have learned much that would have been of use to you," said Rhuna tartly. "But no, you chose to go your own way, same as you always did when you were a cub! Wouldn't listen to anyone, would you? Look at where it's got you! Confused, that's where!"
"But dreams are dreams," said Carrie, rubbing a hand across her eyes. "They can't remain for other people to dream them."
"They're not exactly dreams, child, more like memories left in the stones of the buildings and the mountain itself. At least that's what we think."
"Memories? How can memories be held in stones?"
Rhuna shrugged. "I don't know. I'm only a humble village healer, not one of your smart Guild-trained Telepath Healers."
Carrie didn't miss the sarcasm in Rhuna's tone. Where she rested against Kaid's chest, she felt the growl begin deep inside him.
"You don't fool anyone, Noni," he said. "The only reason you aren't Guild-trained is because you hate the Telepath Guild."
"Too right," she retorted. "Esken's cast in the same mold as his predecessor! Both of them hypocrites! Esken twists good people out of true in his desire to rule the Council. He doesn't do it all himself, oh no! A bribe here and a threat there, to make sure they vote the way he wants. Then there's the ruins. He's "blessed" more ruins to date than any three of his predecessors did! Yes, I know all about him."
"Why?" asked Carrie, the terrors generated by the dream now forgotten. "Why does he destroy the ruins?"
"Told you. Power. Telepaths were feared after the Cataclysm, some folk even thought they'd caused it. Like his predecessors, he doesn't want people poking about in the ruins, bringing back memories of those days and their fear of Telepaths. He doesn't dare let it be known how powerful he is on the Council lest that awaken those old fears, too." She pushed herself stiffly to her feet. "I'm going back to bed now. I suggest you do the same. You shouldn't have any more of those dreams tonight, but if you do, just remember, those times are long gone."
"When were those times, Noni?" Carrie asked.
"Because of the fighting, we think round about the time of the Cataclysm or just after it," she said. "Once the guilds were established, things began to settle down pretty quickly. As far as we know, there hasn't been fighting on Shola on that scale since then. Now, good night. I need my sleep, even if you don't." Rhuna headed back toward the bedroom.
She stopped at the doorway and looked over at them, raising an eye ridge.
Kaid hurriedly released Carrie, moving slightly back from her. "Don't say a thing," he said, his tone cold as he looked at Rhuna.
"Me, Tallinu? What would I say?" Rhuna gave a small laugh as she left the room.
Kaid turned back to Carrie. "It's late, Liegena," he said quietly. "You should sleep peacefully now."
Carrie lay back on the pillows, pulling the covers up around herself. "Kusac said that Ghyan was interested in the dreams, too. Do you think they're all stone memories of the past, Kaid?"
"Perhaps," he said, getting up. "It would certainly be worth talking to Ghyan about them. If they are from the past, perhaps they'll make more sense when we've collected several of them." He moved away from her toward the settee.
"Kaid, could you sleep nearer me, please?" she asked. "I don't care what it was, it frightened me. I'd like you close in case I have another one."
Kaid hesitated, looking from the settee to the bed. "I don't think that's necessary," he said.
"Please."
"If you wish," he sighed, going over to fetch his pillow and blankets. He returned and began spreading them on the floor at the side of the bed.
"I didn't mean on the floor," she said, looking down at him. "This bed is huge. There's plenty of room for you to lie across it at the bottom."
There was plenty of room. The bed was made for Sholans who averaged about two meters while she was only just over a meter tall. He picked up the pillow and put it at the foot of the bed, then sat down.
"Thank you. I'm not used to being alone," she said, her voice trailing off as she began to fall asleep.
Kaid lay down, his back against the footboard of the bed as he wrapped the blankets around himself. Something hard was digging into his side. It was that damned crystal! He shifted slightly, trying not to disturb her, but it didn't ease the discomfort. Slowly, carefully, he eased himself farther onto the bed, trying to lie on his back to take the pressure off his side.
Carrie began to make small, restless, movements, stretching out her legs till her feet touched him. She stopped then, and with what sounded like a purr of contentment, settled down again. He froze, unable to move now. Even through the thick covers, he was hypersensitively aware of the warmth of her feet against him. He waited till he heard the slow breathing that told him she was deeply asleep before he tried edging away from her. Once more she began to stir. Quickly he moved back to where he'd been, only to find his rapid movements had brought the crystal back underneath him again, making it dig in even more sharply than before.
Cautiously he sat up, making sure his legs remained in contact with her feet. Putting his hand in his pocket, he brought out the offending crystal. It seemed to come alive in his hand, warming with the feel and the scent of Carrie. Hurriedly he replaced it. Noni had left a semblance of the Human girl's presence in the crystal. What was the old she-jegget up to? he wondered angrily. And what the hell was he supposed to do with this damned crystal? At least tomorrow they'd be gone, and there'd be no further opportunity for Noni to play any more of her mind games with him.
He tried to settle down but found it nigh on impossible, so aware was he of her presence, and of the crystal in his pocket. Resorting to his litanies, he at last found something of the peace he sought.
* * *
An acolyte led Kusac and T'Chebbi down the corridor to the priest's private quarters. Ghyan opened the door, gesturing to them to enter.
"You surprise me, Liegen Aldatan," said Lijou, the Leader of the Priesthood of Vartra as he turned around to face him. "I was sure you'd bring Kaid with you."
"Kaid's busy," said Kusac shortly, touching Ghyan's hand in greeting as he walked past him to sit in one of the easy chairs. "You asked me to meet you here. What is it you want?"
"Sister T'Chebbi." Lijou nodded a greeting to her as she remained by the doorway on duty. "I'm disappointed that you feel the need for a Brotherhood escort in my presence," he said, moving to sit opposite Kusac. "Aren't you afraid of a conflict of interest?"
Kusac lifted his lips in a grin that was half Human, half Sholan, and watched the Head Priest wince at his display of teeth. "Not at all, Father Lijou. T'Chebbi is contracted to me from the Warrior side of the Brotherhood, not the religious side." His voice held the echo of a gentle purr. "Now, what is so important that it brings you from Stronghold at this time of night?" he asked, relaxing back in his chair.
"This conversation would perhaps be better conducted without an audience," murmured Lijou.
"I have no objections to Ghyan and T'Chebbi being present. We obviously both trust them or we wouldn't be meeting here, would we?"
"Very well, Liegen. The All Guilds Council meets in six weeks. We need to know now if you plan to support us by joining the Brotherhood."
"What's our support worth to you, Father Lijou?" asked Kusac. "What would you give to be counted as a full guild?"
Lijou frowned. "I don't understand you. What do you mean, 'What would I give'?"
"How important is our support to your cause?"
"It's vital. Without your support we have no claim."
Kusac nodded. "I just wanted to remind you, because if you want our support, it will cost you. You see, we've considered our position from every angle and we don't think it's to our advantage to become members of the Brotherhood. You'd use us for your ends, just as Esken has tried to do."
Kusac watched Lijou's eyes narrow. "So what are you suggesting, Liegen Aldatan?" he asked.
"I'm suggesting a permanent alliance with the Brotherhood. All legally drawn up, of course— and secret. As far as the world at large is concerned, we'll become members of the Brotherhood and give you our public support at the Council meeting."
"In return for what?" asked Lijou.
"Your releasing from their oath certain named Brothers to me. They'll have been approached and will be willing to join us. I feel very strongly that telepaths who can fight shouldn't belong to any one guild. They should be an independent force in Sholan politics, a force that can't be bought or used without their consent."
"They'll never grant you guild status of your own," said Lijou.
"We aren't seeking it," said Kusac. "We're quite happy to be thought of as Brotherhood members, so long as the reality is somewhat different."
"Now why would you want independence from the guilds?" Lijou's tone was thoughtful as he clasped his hands on his lap. "Clan reasons? The new breed of children?" He stopped, the realization hitting him. "It's the children, isn't it? You want them protected. The guilds can't help you, but the clans can." He paused. "No, not the clans, a new clan! You're planning on starting a new clan," he said, cocking his head on one side and looking carefully at Kusac.
"Why should you think that?" asked Kusac. "Nothing could be farther from the truth." Too late he felt Lijou's mind gently touch his.
"Dear God, you're going to try the Fire Margins ritual!" Lijou's voice was hushed with fear as his hands grasped the arms of his chair. "In Vartra's name, Kusac, you'll kill yourselves! It's madness to even think it!"
Inwardly, Kusac cursed himself. He should never have come tonight, he'd known he wasn't up to a meeting with Father Lijou. With his mind as distracted by worry over Carrie as it was, there was no way he could maintain adequate shielding against a telepath of Lijou's caliber. He hesitated, mindful of Kaid's warning, wondering if there was any point in trying to bluff it out.
He shook his head slowly. "There's no point in trying to deny it now. It isn't madness, Lijou. It's the only path for us, and it's the one we will take. It's been ordained."
"Kaid! He's behind this!" said Lijou, his fear turning to anger as he sat forward in his seat. "Ghezu was right after all!"
"Kaid may have been expelled from the Brotherhood, but he still follows your God, Lijou. You should respect that in him," said Kusac. "It's none of his doing. Vartra Himself has shown him what will be."
"Has he told you what the survival rate is among those who manage to get there?" demanded the Head Priest. "None! That's how many!"
"He's told me, but we won't be used, Lijou, either by you or Esken," warned Kusac. "Think of the politics in this. You'd be allied to a Clan of En'Shallans— the Brotherhood of Vartra allied to those who've walked with Vartra. Think of the respect you'll receive. Think of how it will strengthen your position as the leading religion on Shola." Kusac dropped his voice slightly. "Think of the edge it would give you over Ghezu."
Lijou shot an angry look at him from under lowered brows. "You've got it all worked out, haven't you? Religious power if you survive the Margins, and temporal through the Brothers you request. You'd owe nothing to anyone!"
"An alliance is an alliance, Lijou," said Kusac softly. "We'd be working together for the same ends: to break the power of Esken on the World Council."
"There's more at stake than just Esken," said Lijou. "I doubt it's occurred to you yet, but we also face a threat from the Terrans. Once they admit telepathy exists and start training their people properly, with their multifaceted psychic abilities, they could surpass us as the Alliance's telepaths. They have a valuable contribution to make, but they're not fit to take a major role in interspecies politics. They're a threat to the power balance, one which the Chemerians could well try to exploit given half a chance. As a species, we Sholans need to change, to evolve, if we're to stay ahead of the Terrans. We can't do this if we continue to follow Esken's restrictive policies."
"I certainly wouldn't support the swift elevation of the Terrans onto the Allied Worlds Council," said Kusac. "Neither would my father. As you say, they still don't believe in their own abilities, let alone ours. They're also technologically backward and paranoid, totally unsuited to a position of such power at this time. Everything I've heard from my parents suggests they will be kept as junior members of the Allied Worlds Council for a long time to come. They aren't even used to belonging to a multispecies society yet!"
"We're in accord on this, then," Lijou nodded. "If we agreed to an alliance with you, then you'd be willing to publicly request permission to join the Brotherhood at the Council meeting?"
"Yes. We'll stand beside you in public and back your request for full guild status— once we've signed the agreement," said Kusac. He hesitated momentarily. "There is one more thing we need from you."
"Training in the Fire Margins ritual."
"Yes," said Kusac. "I'm not a fool, despite what you think, Lijou. I don't intend to throw our lives away on this ritual. I intend us to survive it."
Lijou nodded. "Very well. Ghyan knows all there is to know about the rituals. He'll teach you, won't you, Ghyan?" he said, turning to look at his priest.
"I think this is ill-considered madness ..." Ghyan began.
"You'll make all the records you have regarding the rituals available to Liegen Aldatan, and give him and his Leska your personal tuition, won't you?" Lijou interrupted in a voice that brooked no argument.
"Yes, Father Lijou," said Ghyan in a subdued tone. "Have they chosen a third member yet?"
Kusac's ears swiveled round to face his friend as he turned his head toward him. "A third?"
"There are always three," said Ghyan. "A Leska pair and a Warrior to guard them."
"They have their third," said Lijou. "Kaid. He's admirably suited to the job. Since the God has told him they will walk the Margins, then he should be the one to walk with them. To my mind it seems he was chosen before they were."
Kusac turned to look at Lijou. He could sense the other's amusement at the choice of Kaid— he made no effort to hide it.
"The negotiations seem a little one-sided to me," said Lijou. "Since I will have to convince Leader Ghezu to accept this proposal, my support for you comes with a condition."
Kusac looked at him with grudging respect. That Lijou would make his own demands hadn't occurred to him.
"The Brothers' Oath of Allegiance is made not just to Ghezu, but to me as Head of the Order. They
are
the Brotherhood of Vartra, after all, and I'm Vartra's prime representative on Shola. I will persuade Ghezu to release the Brothers from their oaths to him, but I will not release the Brothers from their Oath to the God. However, I am prepared to second them to you. Had any of the previous Triads succeeded in returning from the Margins, they would have been subject only to Vartra and his Order. I'm only asking what is due. Stay within the religious side of the Brotherhood, as priests. You'll find Shola will accept your people more willingly if they see that you're accountable to one of the guilds. That's
my
price, Kusac."
"They'll think that anyway, Lijou. They won't know that we've never really joined the Brotherhood."
"You'll have to join, Kusac, then your proposed alliance would exonerate you from your oath to Ghezu— but not to me. I want an alliance, too, one that will remain. If you call yourselves the En'Shalla Brothers, then it'll be known where your loyalties lie."
"What's to stop your Order demanding that my people submit to tests or arranged marriages for breeding programs, Lijou? How would it benefit us to remain with you and the priesthood?"
"You'd be En'Shalla. We'd have no jurisdiction over such areas," said Lijou. "Ask your friend. Ghyan is my deputy, he knows the laws. Presumably you trust him to tell you the truth."
Ghyan stirred as Kusac looked at him. "He's telling you the truth. If you disagree with the Order on any issue, you have access to the usual neutral appeal channels. As for the benefits to you, you'd be legitimately able to practice not only as Telepaths but as Warriors, without owing allegiance elsewhere. You can't afford to let your people be outside the guilds, Kusac. We know you have principles, but in times to come, others may not. You're talking of setting up a powerful group of people, with far-reaching abilities— we've no idea how far-reaching they will be— and having nothing to prevent them taking the law quite literally into their own hands. They'd have the ability to read minds and the skills to kill. A far too powerful combination to be left unchecked, my friend."
"I'll need to think about this," said Kusac. He could see that the points they were raising were sound, ones he'd thought of but as yet had not come up with any solution.
"There's no time. What I'm suggesting is, shall we say, unethical?" said Lijou, picking up a crystal ornament from Ghyan's desk and examining it.
"Independent of Ghezu," murmured Kusac, watching the other carefully. He knew Kaid's mind concerning the Warrior Leader, but Lijou...? Here he was, acting independently, putting himself on the line. All it took was for one of them present in the room to mention this in the wrong quarters, and if the Head Priest survived long enough, he'd be cast out of not only the Brotherhood, but also the Telepath Guild, even though traditionally he owed that Guild nothing.
"Very well," he said. "What do you want in surety?"
Lijou looked at Ghyan. "Type a transcript of our agreement, Ghyan. I want it signed and witnessed now."
"Very well, Father Lijou," said Ghyan, activating his comm.
"You'll excuse me implementing our agreement here and now, Kusac, but as I'm sure you appreciate, I can't afford for any details to become public knowledge."
"I understand," nodded Kusac. "And for the agreement with Ghezu?"
"We have an agreement."
As they waited, Lijou broke the silence. "I have just such an ornament as this on my desk, Ghyan. Very nice. Of local origin, is it?" he asked, putting it back.
"Yes," said Ghyan, handing Kusac the document. When he'd read it through carefully, he accepted the stylus and leaning on his friend's desk, signed it then passed it over to Lijou.
"You've made a wise decision, Liegen Aldatan," said Lijou as he affixed his signature to the agreement. "I think you'll find that Kaid will support your actions tonight."
"I make my own decisions, Father Lijou," Kusac replied stiffly.
"I know, but the approbation of one you respect does matter," replied Lijou, mouth opening in a gentle smile. "The official Brotherhood view of Kaid doesn't agree with what I've heard from the people who knew him. Though a loner, he was respected by most of his colleagues, despite the erratic end to his career with us. He was attached to the religious side for many years, you know."
Kusac raised an eye ridge. "You didn't know him personally?"
"Barely. I was appointed during the last year he was there. Those were troubled times for him, I'm afraid," he sighed. "From all accounts, you couldn't have a better mentor. Vartra knew what he was doing when he sent you Kaid."
"You surprise me," murmured Kusac. "I thought you were involved in choosing him."
"Was I?" said the priest, his tone bland as he handed the document back to Ghyan. "I forget. Keep this safe, Ghyan. It mustn't fall into the wrong hands."
Lijou got to his feet. "Have your document of alliance drawn up and delivered to us at Stronghold and we'll sign it. All I ask is that you delay your... trip ... until after the Council meeting. Don't forget to append the names of the Brothers you wish permanently assigned to yourselves. I take it they will include all those currently working for you?"
"Yes, I believe so," said Kusac. "We don't intend to take the ritual until Carrie is fully recovered in any case."
"A wise decision," agreed Lijou, folding his arms in the pouch at the front of his robes. "Till we meet again, Liegen. It's been a pleasure doing business with you," he said, bowing his head before he turned and walked toward the door. He stopped and waited for T'Chebbi to open it for him, then swept out into the dark corridor.
Ghyan let out a hiss of anger as he sank into one of his own chairs. "What the hell are you trying to do, Kusac? Commit suicide? How could you even think of taking the Fire Margins ritual!"