The Wrong Side of Midnight (17 page)

"I can buy my own gown."

"This boutique has dresses in every price range, but whichever one you choose, I'd like to buy it for you. And shoes! We can't forget those. What size do you wear?"

"Stop it! Just stop it." Chloe fell to her knees.

Matthew opened the closet door, walked over and attempted to lift her to her feet. "Say what you need to say, baby."

"I can't! Where am I supposed to begin? Sylvia, you think you can show up here and I'm supposed to forgive you? Where the hell have you been all my life? You ruined me!!!" Chloe got up and slammed the door in her mother's face, and then let her body slide back down
against Matthew's.

He sat on the floor beside her and held her in his arms.

"You gave her my letter! That was private, Matthew!"

"Give her a chance, Chloe. She did so many things wrong, but maybe she's sincere. I can't apologize for giving her your letter. I wasn't about to watch you continue to fall apart like you have been."

Chloe stood up, grabbed her purse and keys, ran out the door past Sylvia, and drove away as fast as she could. The longing to have her mother with her again was gone. She was filled with nothing but hurt and rage. Chloe resisted the urge to hit her on the way out the door.

"Matthew, what am I supposed
to do?"

"You did this to her, Sylvia, you and your husband. All you can do is
wait
for
her
. After all, she waited for you for over two decades. The ball's in your court, and personally, I can't blame Chloe for her reaction." Matthew closed the door.

Chloe drove down the freeway, getting as far away from her mother as she could. When she could no longer see well enough to drive, she pulled over on the shoulder of the road and picked up her cell phone.

"Becky! Come get me!
Please
…"

"Oh God, sweetie, give me a location and I'll be on my way. Just sit where you are."

When Becky got to Chloe on the shoulder of the interstate she found her slumped over the wheel, bawling her eyes out. Her voice was hoarse from the gut-wrenching noises and broken sentences that came out of her mouth. She opened the passenger side, reached over and turned the flashers on, unbuckled her friend, and shut the Jeep off. All she could do after that was hold her. She didn't know exactly what was going on, but had an idea it had something to do with Matthew visiting Sylvia and Earl.

Twenty minutes later, Chloe lay fast asleep on Becky's shoulder. She quietly sent a text to Matthew. "I'm with her. Don't text or call right
now." She picked up Chloe's phone from the cup holder and shut it off. Another hour passed, and Chloe finally lifted her head. She looked around at her surroundings, then at Becky.

"I'm sorry for making you come out here. Sylvia showed up at my apartment asking for forgiveness…told me she wants to start over. All she's doing is setting me up. I'll get hopeful and begin to trust her, and she'll leave again. She's doing this for herself, not me."

"I don't blame you for being ticked off and not trusting her, and I'm not going to tell you to give her a chance. Personally, I want to kick her butt, but that wouldn't solve anything. You need to allow yourself
to feel everything you need to feel. If that means being pissed off, that's what it means. You have a right to feel that way."

"She told me she was sorry."

"Do you believe her?"

"I'm afraid to."

"You
wanna
stay at my place for a while?"

"I wrote my parents a letter that was supposed to stay private. Matthew gave it to them."

"He loves you so much, sweetie, he risked everything to make you better. Even if it meant you'd hate him, he was helping you, the same way you helped him. Don't fault him for that."

"The letter was for my eyes only, Becky."

"So was his account information. Come here."

Becky held her close, but Chloe had no more tears inside her. She was angry and exhausted.

"I think you have two options, love. You can cut your mother out of your life, or you can accept that she screwed up and that maybe you're worth a chance."

"Me? I didn't do anything wrong!"

"Maybe you're worth risking some pain at a chance to have a real mother. Are you worth the risk? For all you know, there might not be any pain at all. It might be one of the best things you've ever had happen to you."

Chloe sat in silence for a long
while.

"I need to tell her some rules and not allow her to be close enough to hurt me again."

"You do this on your terms, Chloe. She's the one who has stuff to prove, not you, and I'll be with you every step of the way. If you want to go out with your mom, I can go with you. If she gets out of line, I can beat her up." Becky flexed her muscle.

Chloe laughed for the first time. "I think I should go to the house and talk to her. Maybe she'll let me in."

"You want me to drive?"

"Yeah, my mind's a million miles away right now."

Becky walked around the Jeep while Chloe climbed over the counsel. The girls didn't talk until
they reached the gates. The guard waved and let them through.

"That was easy," mumbled Becky.

They parked in front of the mansion, and before they could step a foot on the ground, the front doors opened. It was Earl.

"You
wanna
leave?" asked Becky.

"No, we might as well get this over with."

Chloe approached Earl with a scowl on her face. Part of her wanted to run to him when she saw his eyes water, the other part wanted to take off.

When she walked onto the porch, Earl quickly grabbed her up in his arms. Chloe began to squirm and
tried to him push away. The more she tried to resist, the more firm his embrace became.

"I'll be in the Jeep, Chloe. Take as much time as you need, but remember to ask yourself if you're worth it." Becky climbed in and closed the door.

"Come in so we can talk," whispered Earl.

"
You
want to talk? The only person I can talk to is
this
!" Chloe took off running upstairs to her room. She came back down a minute later. "Here, this is what I can talk to. This is where you and my mother have lived!" Chloe threw a scrapbook at him. Inside was every article she'd cut out of the newspaper.

Earl turned it over to face the cover and saw all the hearts his daughter had drawn on the cover. He sat down in a chair and began to slowly turn the pages. Each page was a picture of him or Sylvia. "Happy Father's Day, Dad," was written at the top with a photograph of him smiling for the cameras in Africa. "Happy Birthday, Chloe" was on another page with pictures of gifts she wanted and cut outs of families having birthday celebrations or parties with their children.

When Earl's sobbing became loud, Chloe turned and walked out to Becky. "Let's go."

They stayed silent for a few
minutes while Chloe calmed herself down. She had to yell and cry to do
so."Slow
down, Becky, I need to think before I get home. I'm still really angry and I don't want to take it out on Matthew."

"…Do you remember your dad?"

"Not in person. His voice is even foreign to me. Why didn't they just give me up for adoption if they didn't want me or have time to raise a child?"

"There's nothing I can say to make what they did any better. But there is someone I'm going to take you to go see. Someone who's never
lied
to you, and who you don't have to explain anything to about why you feel the way you do."

Chapter 16

Becky pulled up in front of Lois' small house and knocked on the door. "Come on, Chloe, get out."

Chloe slowly got out of the Jeep, not knowing why she was brought to this house. When she was halfway up to the front steps, the door opened. She took off in a solid run, throwing herself at the strong woman who'd raised her.

"Lois!"

"Come in, girls, I've been waiting for this day." Lois smiled and closed the door behind them.

"Why aren't you at the
mansion?"

"Honey, the only reason I was working there was for you. After you left, there wasn't a need for me."

"Oh my God, I feel so horrible. I never called you after I left, or asked how
you
were doing when I was in the hospital. I'm so sorry!"

"I knew you were living in Detroit, and when I saw you walking hand in hand with Matthew and that smile was stretched across your face, I knew you were happy."

"You followed me?"

"Actually, I followed Becky. But yes, I needed to check on you. After all those years at the house with you, Chloe, you became like my daughter. Just because you left, didn't mean my job was done."

"I need to talk to you, Lois. I'm so messed up right now, and I have questions only you can answer for me."

Lois took her by the hand and led her into a small, pretty living room. Becky followed behind, but gave the women their space. After the girls were seated, Lois put on a pot of water for tea and set up a tray with cookies she'd made.

Chloe's eyes roamed the room. The walls were painted a soft rose color, and the furniture was old but clean. There weren't any statues or expensive paintings, but adorning a wall were framed photographs of Chloe throughout her childhood. Sitting on a shelf were the dozens of projects she'd made for Lois over the
years.

She returned with the tray of tea and cookies. "Here you go, drink some of this," she said as she poured the hot liquid in the cups.

"You kept this stuff…"

"Of course I did. They're my treasures. Do you remember the mess we made when you made those bowls and vases out of pottery clay?"

"Lois, I love you." Chloe got up and held the woman. The sobbing began and she couldn't make it stop. The older woman just stood there and let her cry as long as she needed to. Becky quietly wiped at her own eyes.

When Chloe sat down, she dried her face and took a deep breath. "I don't know where to begin…"

"How about I start then? I know your parents like the back of my hand, and of course, I know you. Everyone acts the way they do for a reason, Chloe, whether it's good or bad. Your parents come with a story of their own. It'll take me a bit, but I'd like for you to listen. I think you're upset and angry out of fear, and all fear comes from a lack of knowledge. I've taught you things all your life, and this is perhaps the greatest lesson."

Chloe sat facing Lois, and from time to time, the old cook would reach over and wipe away a tear off the young woman's face or squeeze her hand.

The story began on the day Lois was hired by the Burlington's, and
how she fell in love with Sylvia's baby from the very start. Chloe listened intently and chuckled at some of her stories. They talked for over two hours, and when Lois was finished, Chloe found herself feeling pain in her heart for her mother.

"I feel bad that Sylvia had to go through all that and feel so hurt, but that didn't give her any reason to do it to me. Even though I went through what she did, I'd never even think about treating my child that way."

"You had me to teach you, Chloe. Your mother had no one. She had no knowledge so she lived in fear. Sylvia didn't know about love, trust, and bonding. All she knew was rejection. Afraid that your father would find someone else and reject
her, she stayed by his side. She knew I was there to care for you and give you love, so she was at peace. Yes it was wrong, but she made sure you were going to be cared for first. Sylvia has a long road ahead of her to make amends for what she's done to you, but if she's willing to learn, you might want to think about teaching her, so she won't be too afraid to try."

"Will you come with me to pick out a wedding gown?"

"I would love to do that with you, but that's a mother's job. Every young bride-to-be should have a chance to have their mother walk with them through that process. Even though I love you like a mother, that's not who I am. Take it slow,
Chloe, you don't have to get married in a week. Give your mom and dad a chance to treat you better, to get to know Matthew, to learn who you are. And if it doesn't work out, you can sleep comfortably at night because you'll know you did everything you could. I know you want them in your life, but they have a lot to prove to you first. Your father is retiring, did you know that? He's never leaving again and is in the process of trying to find someone to take over the business. He's doing it for you."

For five minutes Chloe remained silent as Becky drove back to the freeway to get her car, providing it was still there. She was always so protective of that vehicle
until she found there were more important things in life. A car could easily be replaced, but not being at her best friend's side when she was needed wasn't an option.

The Jaguar was still sitting on the shoulder of the road, unharmed. Becky and Chloe said their goodbyes, with promises to talk again in the morning. Chloe had to get things right with Matthew and figure out how to handle Sylvia and her offer. She had no idea how to proceed with her dad, either.

When she pulled up into the dimly lit parking lot at her apartment, she spotted her mother standing beside her Cadillac, with her jacket wrapped tightly around her body. Her head was faced toward
the ground, trying to keep the cold wind off her face. Chloe got out of her Jeep and walked slowly over to her.

"Why are you still here?"

"I wanted to talk to you. I never gave you a second of my time throughout your life, but there was no way I was going to leave from this place, seeing how much pain you were in and knowing I was the one who caused it. You can go inside if you want, but I'm more than willing to sit out here in my car, all night if I have to, until you're ready to talk."

"You waited outside your car for me this entire time?"

"Yes, and I'd do it all over again."

"I know about your childhood," Chloe blurted out.

"It wasn't nearly as bad as the one I created for you."

"Would you like to come inside where it's warm? I'm not sure what I'm going to do about all this, but you can't expect to show up out of the blue and be my mom."

"You're right. Thank
you,
and I'll take whatever relationship you can offer me."

This was the last person Chloe expected to see when she got home. She would have loved to talk to Matthew first, but hopefully he would understand. She briefly nodded her head in acknowledgement, and then slowly went up the stairs, Sylvia following
closely behind.

When Matthew heard the key in the door, he knew it'd be Chloe, but was worried as to how she was doing. He wanted to call her many times, but knew Becky was right. Chloe had to have time to think without other people's influence. When he saw Sylvia walk in behind her, he was afraid to get his hopes up.

"Have a seat, Sylvia. Matthew, I need to talk with her, and I need you with me."

Matthew waited for Chloe to sit down, and then he joined her on the couch and held her hand.

"What do you expect from me?" Chloe looked Sylvia in the eyes.

"What I expect is for you to hate
my guts, which I deserve, and what I'd like is for you to give me a chance. What do you expect of me?"

"I don't know. I think the best I can ever do is
try
and become friends with you and Earl."

"Thank you, Chloe. Is it okay if I call you, or stop over to visit?"

"I can't promise I'll want to talk or sit and visit. I have a lot to sort out, and you have to be willing to take baby steps with me. One thing's for sure, if you can't accept and be kind to Matthew, then we don't need to ever speak again."

"He's a very good man, Chloe. He'll be welcomed inside this family."

"I have to ask you this. Do you have intentions of leaving?"

"No, we're done traveling. Your father has found someone else to take over his projects in Africa, and he hasn't stepped back in the office since your accident."

Her mind immediately went back to her hospitalization. Even with what Lois told her, she still couldn't understand why a mother would stay away when her child is close to death. "I think I'm going to go to bed, Sylvia, I'm pretty tired. Matthew will walk you to your car. Goodnight."

Chloe stood up and watched as she left.

When Matthew came back inside, he just stood and stared at her. "I'm sorry for—"

"Come here."

Matthew walked over to her and felt her arms wrap around him.

Chloe looked him in the eyes. "I love you more than you'll ever know. You knew you needed to help, regardless of the consequences you'd get from me. You're one heck of an amazing guy. But I'm not marrying you in a week. I can't do something that big, with my world turned upside down. Can you understand and wait for me?"

"You know it, babe. You know I'd wait for you until the end of time."

Chloe lay in bed that night and listened to Matthew take deep breaths as he slept. Seeing her
mother standing out in the cold, waiting for her to come home, wasn't something she thought Sylvia would ever do. Quietly she got out of bed, went into the living room, and called Lois.

"Chloe, is something wrong?"

"I know it's late, and I'm sorry I woke you up."

"Did you have a bad dream?"

Chloe chuckled at the thought of Lois still caring, after all these years, whether or not she had a bad dream. "I wanted to talk to you for a minute if that's okay?"

"What's on your mind, sweetie?"

"I came home tonight and found my mother standing out in the cold, in a crappy neighborhood I might add, waiting for me. I can't get that
out of my head."

"I think she's serious. I've known that woman for a long time, and she's never done anything that desperate for anyone. That was her way of letting you know she wasn't going to run."

"What am I supposed to do?"

"Chloe, search your heart. You're a very good person, and I've never known you to let someone stay out in the cold for no reason. Think about what I said, and try to get some sleep. You'll figure out what it all means."

∞  ∞  ∞  ∞

Chloe got up early and cancelled the reservations for the church. After downing her third cup of coffee, she picked up the phone and called her mother.

"Sylvia, I'm going out to look at dresses if you'd like to come along."

"Let me throw my shoes on and I'll be right there!"

"No, I'll come by and get you so this doesn't end up in the papers."

"Sweetie, even if we get followed by the bloodthirsty reporters, at least the pictures would be the truth. Can I come and pick you up?"

"No, I'll be there at eleven."

Chloe wrote a note for Matthew in case he decided to come home for lunch. She didn't want to worry him.
Then she got on her shoes and went out the door. When she reached the estate, her father was walking around the yard. He looked up at her and began to walk over. She hadn't thought about this happening. She stayed in her car and tapped on the horn. Sylvia came outside, kissed Earl on the cheek, and then climbed in the Jeep.

"Hi, sweetie, would you like to go to that boutique?"

"Sure." Her brow furrowed the moment her mom arrived.

Chloe turned on the radio and drove to the bridal salon so there wouldn't be a bunch of dead silence. She knew Sylvia would try to chit-chat and that was the last thing she was interested in doing.

When they reached the boutique, her mother was the one who talked to the saleslady.

"Mrs. Burlington! It's so good to see you again! What can I do for you? We have a great line of new spring arrivals…"

"I'm not here for
me,
I'd like you to bring my daughter some bridal gowns to try on."

"Ooh, I didn't know you had a daughter."

The silence cut deep.

"I'll go get some dresses, Ms. Burlington, just have a seat right over there and I'll be right back."

Sylvia's cheeks were still burning and her eyes were watery when she turned to her daughter. "Chloe, I'm so sorry. We can go if
you'd like."

"Baby steps, remember?"

Chloe tried on so many gowns, and just when she was ready to give up, the lady brought her one more. This one came in this morning. I just didn't get to the deliveries yet. Look!"