The Writer Behind the Words

Copyright © 2005, 2007 Sadé Odubiyi

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, recording or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the author.

DISCLAIMER
This book is not intended to provide professional advice and is sold with the understanding that the publisher and the author are not liable for the misconception or misuse of the information provided. The author and ILORI Press shall have neither liability nor responsibility to any person or entity with respect to any loss, damage, or injury caused or alleged to be caused directly or indirectly by the information provided in this book or the use of any products mentioned.

ILORI Press
PO Box 10332
Silver Spring, MD 20914

First Ebook Edition: July 2010

Previously published as
How to Bounce When You Want to Shatter: Steps to Resilience in the Writing Life

To writers everywhere who dare to live their dreams

Preface to Revised Edition

Introduction

PART ONE: Assessing Yourself

Search For The Blueprint Of Success

Defining Success

Hard Truths

The Paradox

Traits Of Successful Writers

Necessary Keys for Resilience

Abundance

PART TWO: Surviving the Battlefield

Disappointment

Discouragement

Doubt

Depression

The Ultimate Dream Killer

Getting Started

Creative Block

Write Anyway

Comparison

Envy

Creative Flood

Success

PART THREE: Four Steps To Resilience

Get Support

Relax

Know Your Limitations

Get a Strategy

Success is Your Birthright

Recommended Resources

Organizations

About the Author

T
his book started out as a series of articles I planned to put on my website for new authors. I wanted to share with them the pitfalls I had faced as a writer and author. I saw how quickly the joy of creation was crushed by the need for money, the lack of support and obstacles that the writing life throws in the pathway of many. There were many times when I thought I was crazy; that I had no business being a writer.

I had recently parted with an agent, I’d been forced to hire a literary attorney to get me out of a legal position with a publisher and I had been orphaned by two editors leaving in less than two years. I wasn’t sure how long my writing career would last. Even my lawyer told me that for someone so newly published I had faced a lot of obstacles. But despite what others may have called misfortune or the plight of the creative person, I never lost my joy of writing.

I refused to let the business of publishing destroy my joy of writing. I saw other authors crumble because of a few rejections (it took me thirteen years to get a book published. I started sending out manuscripts when I was twelve) and freelance writers turn in assignments and not get paid (that happened to me and I had to get the law involved). I knew why I was still in the game while others had faded away.

I thought that it was unfair because I wasn’t anyone special. I just had one skill they did not: I knew the art of bouncing back.

I wrote this book as a gift to other writers who are discouraged, feel hopeless or useless in a world that can make us — the artist — feel insignificant and invisible. I hope that this revised edition will be a companion to those of you who feel that another day is too painful or that you are alone in your misery.

Isolation is deadly to the spirit, yet, as a writer, a necessary requirement at times. So let this little book be a friend that whispers to you: “You are important and your words are needed.”

I dedicate this book to the author of six romances who hasn’t sold a story in the past seven years, the mystery writer whose series fails after three books, the mainstream author whose book is remaindered within months of release, the freelancer who has yet to see a check above four hundred dollars, to the beginner who faces another rejection slip in the mail or is struggling through a book and is afraid it will never get published.

I don’t profess to be an expert, but I’ve survived through resilience and I want to show you how. Envy, Doubt, Discouragement — I’ve faced them all and more. I continue to face them. But they pale in comparison to the beauty and joy of creation and the wonderful gifts it brings.

D
o you think it’s impossible to make a living as a writer because: It’s difficult to get published?; the mid-list is shrinking?; fewer people are reading, yet more people are writing?; the market is overcrowded and on a downward spiral?

In spite of these and other dire considerations, there are authors who have bounced back from low sales, sold to publishers without agents, made a handsome income as mid-list writers and reinvented themselves and their careers.

The Writer Behind the Words
isn’t a “how to write” book. There are plenty of books about how to write a bestseller, improve your grammar, find paying markets, develop your career and so on. This is a book to help you when:

• You’re a hundred fifty pages into your book and it stalls: Look at
  Creative Blocks
  .
  
 

• You’ve received a rejection and can’t move forward: Check out
  Rejection
  .
  
 

• A good friend just got a publishing contract and you can see your skin turning green: Go to
  Envy
  .
  
 

You’ll also learn what to do with a bad review, how to get your career back on track when it seems to have derailed, foods to help boost your energy, and many other topics important to writers. Someone once said that “our problems aren’t our problems; it’s our solutions that are the problem.” You will learn how to identify solutions that will lead you to success.

I know the traps ahead. When I was an unpublished writer, I dealt with years of rejections, projects that almost got a yes, discouragement, and doubt. As a published author, I have faced poor reviews, being orphaned (by the departure of my editor), breaking up with my agent and a host of other obstacles, but I’m still in the game. I’ll reveal how I’ve kept going in times of adversity, using examples from exercises I’ve discovered from different sources.

Resilience will help to keep you from becoming an industry statistic. The difference between longevity in publishing and being a “one book wonder” or a “struggling freelancer” is the ability to move forward in spite of setbacks. It’s a skill that can be learned. Your dreams are at hand. Forward, march!

B
eginning writers are eager for answers. They gobble up articles like: “Ten Secrets to Publication,” “Avoid the Slush Pile,” and “Don’t Get Rejected.” Sometimes these articles are as helpful and informative as the staple “Lose Ten Pounds in Ten Days,” “Find Your Soul mate in Three Weeks,” or “Raise the Perfect Child in A Month.” Beginners are full of questions, in search of the elusive key to success. They are full of questions with the hope that the “right” answers will solve everything. They wonder:

Is it best to write during the day or at night? Should I outline or not?

Should I first send to an editor or agent?

Do I need a critique group or should I enter contests?

Should I write a short story or a novel?

The answer is
yes
to all of the above. Confusing, I know. Some authors will give definite answers to these questions: You must outline. You must have a critique group. You must have a character profile. Thou shalt have no other gods before me…you get the picture. Truthfully, the answers to those questions do not matter because there is no definitive formula.

What does that mean? It means you’re in publishing. It means that you’ll spend time writing a synopsis and meet a writer who gets a contract without one. It means you’ll contact agents and meet a writer who sold directly to a publisher. It means you’ll meet writers picked up out of the slush pile and those discovered at conferences. It means you’ll meet someone whose first book is a success while yours sinks like an anvil.

There are many different stories on the path to publication and writing success. You will need to create your own. Stop being hungry for a guide or map. Joseph Chilton Pierce said,
To live a creative life, we must lose our fear of being wrong.

Experiment. If outlines make you lose interest, stop outlining. If you fall asleep at 10:00 PM, don’t write at night. This is a business about individuals. Don’t try to “do what’s right;” do what works for you.

S
etbacks are a part of any creative endeavor, and you’ll find plenty of setbacks in the writing life. You’ll lose contests, get nasty reviews, see others succeed before you…and it will hurt.

If you are discouraged to the point that you can’t write anymore, I suggest that you stop writing for publication. Write for the joy of it, for personal satisfaction, and not for anyone else. Why? Because publication isn’t a cure for anything that ails you and writing doesn’t get easier. Stephen King had a cocaine habit
after
he was published, Grace Metalious, the author of
Peyton Place,
drank herself into the ground, and authors still commit suicide.

So if you’re hoping that being published will:

Validate you

Make you worthy

Make you happy

Make you successful

Make you attractive

I’m here to tell you it won’t. Writing to get “love” (attention, adoration, etc.) is dangerous because not everyone will like your work. They’re not supposed to. Even if you sell a million copies, one nasty review will stick in your mind like gum in your hair. You will need to make the act of writing (the creative process) a joy, a cushion for the pain of the business. Someone else will sell more, make more, and have more. It doesn’t matter. Your life has nothing to do with them. Enjoy being a creative person, and write.

For many people, external goals never satisfy the inner spirit. Many people get married, have kids, buy a new car, hoping those things will make them happy. They may not. People win the lottery and still end up miserable. If there’s something lacking inside you it will still be lacking after publication. You will need to start defining what success means to you. Don’t use someone else’s definition. Be truthful to your inner desire and need. Don’t judge it. Just listen. It’s your desire and it’s meant to be heard. Get a journal and write about your ideal life. Getting published is great, but go beyond that. Why?

Consider this:

• You could get a couple of articles published and earn a grand total of two hundred dollars for the next five years. Would you consider yourself successful?
  
 

• You could get published and get no byline. Is that success?
  
 

• You could be published in mass-market paperback instead of hardcover.
  
 

• You could have an article published in a magazine no one has ever heard of.
  
 

• You could get a six-figure book deal and never publish again and have your book go out of print within a year.