“Still stuck at at home, are you?”
Ignoring the implication, O’Layle replied, “For the moment. And you?”
“The Master needs me here in the Happenstance.”
“Nice?”
“Enough.”
By decree, all public transmissions were minimal, leaving the bulk of the ship’s com-system free for the captains. What O’Layle could see was his ex-lover’s face and sweet body rendered in two dimensions, plus flat glimpses hinting at the delicious scenery, a rich greenish blue forest wrapped snug around some bottomless black lake. Ancient memories were dislodged, and suddenly O’Layle was transported into the past. He wasn’t named O’Layle, and the lover was a different woman, beautiful in her own peculiar ways. What was her name? With the millennia, he had lost the simple sound of it, but what he remembered was its rhythm. Its music. Like water spilling on a flat stone, wasn’t it?
“You’re smiling,” the woman observed.
Was he? O’Layle carefully laid a hand over his mouth, wiping away an expression that couldn’t have been more inappropriate.
“But of course you’re smiling,” she continued. “Your goddess is here. She’s come here to free you, you’re thinking. And I bet in your entire life, you’ve never felt happier.”
“No,” he sputtered.
“Don’t lie.”
Was that what he was doing?
“We know you,” she reminded him. “Don’t think we don’t. And we talk about you all the time, too.”
How was he supposed to respond?
“Look at me, O’Layle.”
He dropped his hand, revealing a grim expression.
“We’re dead.”
“No—”
“And you helped kill us,” she maintained. The Happenstance was not all that far beneath O’Layle’s prison cell, their communication nearly instantaneous. Eyes like black water stared at a point far beyond him. It was a dead stare matched by a dry, resigned voice—a ghost’s voice drained of its heat and rage—and with it she reminded him, “You told her about us. About the Great Ship and its secret cargo. You are the one. The reason, the impetus. The tiny nuclei that starts the catastrophic chain reaction—”
“No!”
“You shit,” she said.
What could he offer now?
The woman paused, breathing deeply for a moment. Then with a cold mocking voice, she asked, “Do you know why they spread us out across the ship?”
His old friends and lovers were everywhere.
“No,” he began. But then he realized that she didn’t mean just the people in their little orbit. For perhaps the first time in her life, the woman was referring to everyone, passengers and crew alike.
“Your goddess wants to kill our ship,” she reminded him.
The Blue World wasn’t his. The polypond and Inkwell did not belong to him. What he did and did not tell the enormous creature didn’t matter now, since she would have learned everything on her own, and with the same horrid, inevitable consequences. Just for two seconds, he wished people would stop repeating this empty nonsense.
“Your lover wants our ship destroyed, and she wants to free the monster in the middle. Which may well obliterate the known universe, it seems.” Her mouth clenched and her eyes grew larger. “The captains have let the news leak. That, or it’s just too big and awful … too much truth to keep it secret any longer …”
O’Layle glanced at a public feed. Through a hardened eye perched on one of the great nozzles, he could see the depleted but still-enormous spawn of the Blue World. She was the size of a moon, riding a great plume of radiation that continued to carry her on a collision course that began years ago. In another few days, she would pass that point where the Great Ship’s mass would accomplish as much as her muscular engine, and then she would accelerate farther, plunging into what was already herself.
“Your goddess has plenty of weapons,” the woman observed.
Separate feeds brought a catastrophic stew of images. The polypond churned and spat lightning and laser bolts, obliterating the bombs and skimmers sent out to injure her; tendrils and tritium charges were beginning to batter the ship’s engines, plainly trying to quiet them; and when their vessel was left drifting dead through space, what would happen … ?
“We still haven’t seen all her claws,” the woman offered.
“I’m not responsible,” O’Layle whispered.
“Then who is?”
“It could have been anyone.”
“It was you.”
“I should have stayed on board the ship,” he relented. “How many times do I have to say that?”
“But no, we were glad you ran. In fact, thrilled to be rid of you.” A brilliant, bitter smile washed away the blackness of the eyes. “Your mistake was ignoring some very long odds, O’Layle. You ignored them, and then despite the odds, you survived.”
He started to close down the line at his end.
“You won a temporary survival,” she growled.
He shook his head. “The captains have surprises waiting, I’m sure. And the Great Ship has proved … that it can ignore long odds, too.”
But the woman had already vanished, leaving him pleading with a flat and empty blackness.
THE BLUE WORLD continued her descent.
Alone, O’Layle lived in the most remote room of his enormous prison cell, watching the public feeds, feeling a dim and constantly diminishing interest in the war news. What could he do? Absolutely nothing. Neither the polypond nor the captains had any interest in him. His friends and old companions wouldn’t answer his pleas. And why should they? There was nothing left to do but sit, sleeping when necessary and eating the occasional bite of barely tasted food. For another two days, even thought seemed like too much effort. This was infinitely worse than drifting inside that hyperfiber bubble, wandering between the stars … in so many more ways, he felt alone and lost, hope spent and not even an imaginary thread connecting him to the souls that should have mattered …
The third day brought weeping punctuated with deep, wrenching sobs.
And then he slept, and it was suddenly the fourth day.
The Blue World was about to fall on their heads, and O’Layle woke from a brief, cleansing sleep. He couldn’t remember any dreams, or even a coherent thought, but
something obvious had burrowed its way into his mind. Obvious, and probably useless. But it was such a simple, perfect idea that he found himself unable to throw it aside.
The captains had left him with a special nexus and instructions. “If you ever think of anything new, use the nexus. Any new memory, any new insight. If it seems inconsequential, tell us about it anyway. Rely on us to judge what is and what can never be worthwhile.”
“O’Layle here,” he whispered to the activated nexus.
Nothing happened.
On the public feed, he could see the Blue World falling rapidly. Little flecks of light marked where warheads detonated in the space beneath it. Trying to poison her with radiations and other hazards, no doubt.
“I just thought of something,” he told the silence. “Something obvious, and I’m sure you thought of it, too. But maybe you didn’t. Or maybe you did, but then threw the notion away.”
No captain answered. They were too busy fighting, and that probably wouldn’t change before the end of everything.
“Hello,” he kept saying.
Minutes passed.
Forever.
No human had ever felt so alone, he told himself.
And then came a smooth musical voice, familiar and beautiful, and O’Layle very nearly broke into tears again.
“Quick,” was all that Washen said.
To the First Chair, he muttered, “Madam. Thank you.”
“What is it?”
And then O’Layle hesitated. He hesitated and grinned slyly, and with a resolve that took both of them by surprise, he said, “No.”
“What?” the distracted voice said.
“I want to help you,” O’Layle muttered.
Silence.
“And the Great Ship, too.”
Quietly, Washen asked, “Do you have something, or don’t you?”
“But I won’t tell it to you,” he promised. Could she see his smile? Probably. Then he thought, Good. Let her see my smug, grinning face.
Silence.
“You need to let me go free,” O’Layle demanded.
“No.”
“Let me help you,” he pleaded. “Give me something difficult to do, and dangerous. I don’t care what.”
Silence.
“All right,” he said. Then with a faith born from depression and a bottomless longing, he told the First Chair what had finally, finally occurred to him.
Silence.
“Is it important?” he inquired.
“Probably not,” she allowed.
Of course it wasn’t.
But then with a quiet, tight voice, Washen suggested, “You should try your front door. Maybe you’ll find that it’s unlocked.”