That was too much for Freddie. He turned and ran for his life.
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James said, “Weren’t you a little hard on the boy?”
Reiver whirled around. “Hard on him? Skinning him alive would be hard on him.” He looked around at the devastation and swore again. “A whole crop of cocoons is gone. Lost. Ruined. And all because one goddamn stupid little boy fell asleep.”
“Maybe we can salvage something,” James said softly.
Reiver scoffed at that. “Those that weren’t killed are probably too shocked to spin.”
“Let’s try, anyway.”
So James and Reiver got to work, Hannah and the baby forgotten.
Her ordeal was over, and she had survived.
Hannah looked down at her infant son feeding greedily at her breast, and the long hours of agonizing pain that had racked her body vanished from her memory as though they had never occurred. She felt a surge of love so powerful that it jolted her physically. He was so tiny, with ten perfectly formed, miniature fingers and toes.
“Giving birth is hell, isn’t it?” Mrs. Hardy said. “But now you’ve earned a rest. When you wake up, Reiver will be here.”
But when Hannah finally did awaken, she saw Samuel sitting beside her bed, his eyes bleary and jaw shadowed with stubble.
He squeezed her hand. “How are you feeling?”
She smiled wanly. “Much better, now that it’s over.”
He looked down at the baby lying in the wooden cradle that James had built for him just two weeks ago. “Thank you for giving me such a handsome nephew.
What are you going to name him?”
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“Reiver and I have agreed on Benjamin,” she replied. She frowned. “What time is it?”
“It’s almost morning.”
She looked past him at the door. “Where is Reiver?”
“He and James are still in the rearing shed,” he said. “A cat got in and—”
“You needn’t make excuses for him, Samuel,” Hannah said bitterly. “Those worms mean more to him than me or his son.”
“Not that I want to defend my brother, but this accident was a calamity. He and James have been working all night trying to salvage what’s left of the worms.” He managed a reassuring smile. “He’ll be here soon. And he’ll be delighted with his son, I promise.”
After Samuel left, Hannah looked down at her peacefully sleeping son.
Suddenly she realized that her husband no longer mattered to her as much as her child. She was bound to her husband legally, but she was bound to her son by blood. She would give all her love to Benjamin, and he would return that love a hundredfold.
Her son was her future, her family, her power.
There came a knock on the door, and it opened to reveal Reiver, looking both haggard and sheepish.
“I’m sorry your worms were destroyed,” Hannah said, thinking those were the words he wanted to hear above all others.
But his eyes were on the cradle as he crossed the room.
Hannah reached down and picked up the sleeping bundle, holding him as if he were made of glass. “Isn’t he beautiful?”
Reiver ran one finger down the baby’s soft cheek and stared down at him as if he had never seen one before. “My son.”
No, Hannah thought.
Mine.
73
Chapter Four
“Benjamin Shaw, you are the smartest little boy in the whole world,”
Hannah said, beaming down at her fourteen-month-old son as he sat on the nursery floor and carefully piled the little wooden blocks atop each other.
“You’ve just built a house, yes, you have.”
Benjamin’s cherubic face split into a wide grin at his mother’s effusive praise just before he swung his hand and demolished his creation with one quick swipe, sending the blocks clattering and scattering all over the floor. Then he giggled and clapped his hands.
“Oh, we’re so pleased with ourselves, aren’t we?” With an indulgent sigh, Hannah knelt to retrieve the blocks and set them before her son to pile up and knock down again.
She rose and the dizziness hit her like an unexpected slap in the face.
Groping for support, she found the back of a chair and clung to it, waiting for the nausea to pass.
When the room stopped spinning, she smiled at her son, who was eyeing her strange behavior solemnly. “Well, Benjamin, soon you will have a little baby brother or sister to play with.”
She knew it wasn’t the stifling July heat that was making her light-headed.
She had missed two monthly cycles, and since Benjamin had been weaned, the tenderness in her breasts had nothing to do with nursing.
The Vow
No, she didn’t need Dr. Bradley to tell her that she was going to have another baby. Joy as bright as the summer sunshine filled her. She couldn’t wait to tell Samuel.
The moment Hannah realized her mental slip, she blushed and looked down at her son as if he could read her thoughts. “I meant your father.”
Scooping up the baby in her arms, she said, “And I’m going to tell him right now.”
After Hannah left Benjamin in the kitchen with Mrs. Hardy, she hurried across the lawn toward the mill.
She hadn’t meant to think of Samuel first. His name had just popped into her head. It meant nothing. Nothing at all.
Hannah reached the mill and went inside, still a little awed by the huge square stone building with its windows set high to collect as much daylight as possible to illuminate the work area below. It was so obviously Reiver’s domain, a mysterious world of noisy water-powered looms spinning silk onto bobbins.
She searched the room for her husband, and finally found him standing in a corner, a paper in his hand, deep in animated conversation with James. Although she couldn’t hear him over the din of the machines, she knew from his scowl that he was furious about something.
She walked over to them. “Reiver, may I speak to you for a moment?”
He didn’t even glance up from the paper. “Not now, Hannah.”
“But it’s very important.”
“It will just have to wait.” Ignoring her, he stabbed at the paper he held and said to James, “Can’t you see that this gear configuration will never work?”
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Hannah turned and quietly left, trying to ignore the mill girls’ sidelong pitying glances for their employer’s slighted wife. Outside, she blinked rapidly, telling herself that her eyes were watering because of the painful, blinding sunlight. She walked back to the homestead.
No sooner did she reach the back door than she noticed that Samuel had tied his new horse, Titan, in the shade of a nearby oak tree and was industriously brushing the chestnut’s coat to a burnished shine. Because of the hazy afternoon heat, Samuel went shirtless.
Hannah should have gone inside, but found she couldn’t tear her eyes away from Samuel. While his bare shoulders and back were not as broad or muscular as Reiver’s, they rippled beneath his pale skin as he extended his arm to the crest of Titan’s neck, then drew the brush down in a firm sweeping line. His narrow hips shifted his balance with every movement.
Hannah was just about to go inside when the horse betrayed her by lifting his head, perking up his ears, and whinnying softly in welcome. Samuel turned, saw her, and smiled.
She had no choice but to join him. “He’s beautiful,” she said, extending her hand so Titan could nuzzle her palm with his velvety muzzle. If she kept her attention focused on Titan, she wouldn’t have to look at Samuel’s bare chest, as shiny with sweat as his horse’s hide.
“Isn’t he?” Samuel scratched Titan between the ears, causing him to close his eyes and sigh in equine contentment. “He’s as fast as the wind and as gentle as a baby.”
“Speaking of babies,” Hannah said, blushing, “Reiver and I are going to be parents again.” She kept her eyes focused on the horse’s cheek.
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The Vow
Even though she wasn’t looking at Samuel, Hannah could sense a change in him at once, a withdrawal, as if she had disappointed him somehow. Then it was gone in an instant.
“That’s wonderful,” he said, transferring the brush to his right hand and moving away to brush Titan’s sleek hindquarters. “Congratulations. I’m sure my brother must be excited and pleased.”
“I haven’t told him yet.”
Samuel stopped brushing and raised his brows in surprise. “Reiver doesn’t know?”
Hannah faced him. Even in the cool dark shade, his pale blue eyes collected the light, making them look more vibrant. “I tried just now,” she said.
“Don’t tell me. He said he was too busy to talk to you.” He paused. “I can tell you’re disappointed.”
“I try not to be. I know Reiver is working hard to make the mill a success.”
Samuel’s handsome features darkened. “He could still spare you a minute of his time, especially to hear wonderful news like this.”
Hannah lifted one shoulder in an unconcerned shrug. “I’ll tell him tonight, before dinner, when he’s had a chance to rest and isn’t so preoccupied with the mill.”
“I think it’s time I had a little talk with my brother.”
She placed a restraining hand on his arm. It felt pleasantly hot and damp, the hairs rough to the touch. “Please don’t. You’ll only make Reiver angry.”
When Samuel glanced down at her hand still resting on his arm, Hannah became self-conscious and quickly withdrew it.
“My brother may know a great deal about running a silk mill,” Samuel said,
“but he has much to learn about being a considerate husband. Still, if you don’t wish me to speak to him…”
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“It would be best.”
“Then I won’t.” He studied her. “How are you feeling? You look very pale today.”
“I felt a little dizzy this morning while playing with Benjamin, but it passed.”
He frowned. “You’re running yourself ragged. Perhaps you should get more rest and let the girls do the household chores.”
The distinct aroma of horseflesh and male sweat tickled Hannah’s nose.
“You needn’t worry, Samuel. I’m fine, really.”
He took a step closer. “I worry about you.”
Titan swung his head around and stared at his master. Hannah stared at Samuel as well, all too aware that the atmosphere between them had suddenly thickened, becoming as charged with promise as a summer thunderstorm. Part of her wanted to run from it. Another part of her wanted to embrace it.
She reached out and combed her fingers through Titan’s coarse mane. “You needn’t worry. The dizziness will pass. I’d endure any physical discomfort to have another child.” She couldn’t stop the words from tumbling out of her mouth. “Benjamin is such a joy that I can’t wait to have another, hopefully a little girl this time.”
“I hope you get exactly what you want, Hannah.”
Why did she have the uncomfortable feeling that he wasn’t referring to her unborn child?
“I’m sure we will. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to get back to the house.”
She fled before Samuel could say another word.
78
The Vow
Once back in the house, Hannah busied herself in the buttery chopping dried rosemary and lemon verbena, but her thoughts kept dwelling on Samuel standing in the shade, grooming his horse.
She inhaled the rich spicy aroma and smiled to herself. He listened to her. He shared her happiness about the baby. He expressed his concern for her well-being.
Hannah finished chopping the herbs and refilled the spice box. Tonight when she told Reiver her wonderful news, he would be just as excited and solicitous as his brother.
Later that evening, Hannah hesitated in the doorway of their bedchamber.
“Reiver, may I speak to you for a moment?”
He buttoned a clean shirt. “Only for a minute. I’m on my way out.”
Hannah hid her disappointment. “Oh? You won’t be having dinner with the family this evening?”
He shook his head and slipped into his best waistcoat. “I’m dining with the Athelsons. Important business.” He looked at her. “What did you want to tell me?”
“You’re going to be a father again.”
Reiver’s hand stopped at the third waistcoat button. “Another child?” When Hannah blushed and nodded, he grinned, strode over to her and kissed her on the cheek. “That’s wonderful news. Another son for the Shaw silk empire.”
She didn’t say she hoped it was a daughter. She waited for him to realize that this was the exciting news she couldn’t wait to tell him at the mill today and to feel remorse for brushing her off so pointedly, but all he did was return to the cheval glass and finish buttoning his waistcoat.
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“Does the rest of the family know?” he asked.
“I wanted to tell you first.”
“I’m sure they’ll be as excited as I am.” Reiver put on his black frock coat and straightened it so that it hung properly. Then he walked over to Hannah, took her hands, and kissed them. “I’ll probably be late, so don’t wait up for me. And I’ll go back to sleeping in the other room until the baby comes.”
Then he disappeared down the hall.
That summer of 1842 passed too slowly for Hannah, and she was relieved when September flew by more quickly.
Already five months pregnant, she had to wear looser dresses to accommodate her swelling middle.
One cool October morning she was churning butter when Samuel came into the buttery, his eyes sparkling with excitement.
“I’ve just sold five more engravings,” he announced, “and I want to celebrate.”
Hannah stopped her work and smiled. “Celebrate in the middle of the week?
Samuel Shaw, how sinful. Reverend Crane would never approve.”
“I’m in the mood for sin,” he said, grinning. “Would you care to join me?”
She recognized his teasing for what it was and retorted, “I’ll have you know that women in my condition avoid sin at all costs.”
He wiggled his eyebrows and twirled an imaginary mustache like a stage villain in some lurid melodrama. “Would the unsuspecting damsel agree to a carriage ride into the hills south of town?”