Read The Toyminator Online

Authors: Robert Rankin

Tags: #sf_humor, #Fiction, #Fantasy, #General, #Science Fiction, #Fantasy fiction, #Humorous, #Teddy bears, #Apocalypse in literature, #Toys

The Toyminator (28 page)

BOOK: The Toyminator
12.38Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads
18

As opposed to the ‘ceiling below’ – although there is no such thing. Unless of course you live in a flat. But this is by the by.

n_18
19

Well, it
was
all soiled with the sewage.

n_19
20

 The Hollywood sign is probably the most famous sign in all of the world. It was erected in 1923 to advertise the housing development beneath it. The original letters, fifty feet high and thirty feet wide, spelled out ‘Hollywoodland’ and were lit up nightly by more than four thousand bulbs. With a chap living in a little hut behind the sign, whose job was to change them when they needed changing. Nice work if you can get it. In 1932 an aspiring young starlet named Peg Entwhistle threw herself off the H. Others followed her example, but to avoid the bad publicity their names went unpublished in the Los Angeles press. In 1939, the light-bulb chap was sacked, the sign fell into disrepair and all its light bulbs were stolen. But then in 1949, the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce restored the sign, knocking down the ‘land’ bit at the end. By 1978 it was all knackered again, so the Chamber of Commerce got a fund-raising campaign going, raised enough cash to completely restore the sign and have kept it looking smart ever since. With the aid of sponsorship from Hollywood stars. Apparently Alice Cooper sponsors The Second Big O.

n_20
21

For it is indeed upon Mount Lee that the Hollywood sign is to be found.

n_21
22

The Roosevelt Hotel is a magnificent Spanish-colonial-style affair, built in 1927 and thoroughly unspoilt, and it is to be noted that not only were the very first Academy Awards presented there, but Marilyn Monroe did her first ever professional photo-shoot beside the pool.

n_22
23

 Yes,
there
, obviously.

n_23
24

Now, again for those who harbour an interest in such things, it is to be stated that Mann’s Chinese Theatre can truly be described as the jewel in Hollywood’s crown. Created in the late nineteen-twenties by Sid Grauman, this oriental-style folly, with its sixty-nine-foot-high exotic bronze roof and its wealth of architectural detail, dazzles the eye and is the palace for the ‘royalty’ of Hollywood.

n_24
25

What? Ed.

n_25
26

Look it up. It’s really weird.

n_26
27

 Yes,
there
. What a good movie,
Bladerunner
, eh?

n_27
28

Oh, it’s the 1950s, is it? YES, IT IS.

n_28
29

You look a right Herbert in the one you bought. Ed.

n_29
30

As well he might!

n_30
31

Number twenty-three being that number which always turns up in American movies. On hotel room doors, on the sides of freight train carriages. Here, there, everywhere. Why? Well …

n_31
32

 Ronin. And what a great movie
that
is!

n_32
33

Well, it would in the 1960s on Owlsley acid.

n_33
34

And there is!

n_34
35

Absolutely true.

n_35
36

Ah, that’s where.

n_36
37

(For there is much jargon involved in being a trucker in the USA and chatting on the old CB.)

n_37
38

There it is again. Weird, isn’t it?

n_38
39

This being one of those roadside diners that had a petrol pump in front. Which was quite convenient really.

n_39
40

And a garage too. How convenient was
that
?

n_40
41

Damn me, not
again
!

n_41
42

If it’s going to become a running gag, it’s already becoming tedious. (Ed).

n_42
43

Make that the last (Ed).

n_43
44

The old ones really are the best.

n_44
45

It might well be asked why, if the other Jack was in fact an armoured robot, he didn’t simply do away with the officers when they arrested him at Area 52. It might well be asked, but it’s as sure as sure that it won’t be answered. Surely he was ordered not to cause a commotion near the launch site, and at all until the launch time was up and he was sure that the operation was under way! It’s possible, so let’s stick with that.

n_45
46

A soft drink popular amongst rubber toys.

n_46
47

Or
hen
pit, possibly. Or possibly not.

n_47
48

As opposed to starboard. As ships of all varieties are wont to do in this kind of situation.

n_48
FB2 document info

Document ID: 7eda15df-0585-41a1-ad73-4bc9b4f0c29a

Document version: 1

Document creation date: 2010-01-22

Created using: doc2fb, FB Editor v2.0 software

Document authors :
  • Bakoro
Document history:

ABEB Version: 3.0 Created: 2007/1/29 @ 17:52 An mdf Scan & Proofread.

About

This book was generated by Lord KiRon's FB2EPUB converter version 1.0.35.0.

Эта книга создана при помощи конвертера FB2EPUB версии 1.0.35.0 написанного Lord KiRon

BOOK: The Toyminator
12.38Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

Other books

Renegades of Gor by John Norman
Cape Fear by John D. MacDonald
Wyoming Slaughter by William W. Johnstone
A Christmas Bride by Hope Ramsay
Another Me by Eva Wiseman
The Rich Are Different by Susan Howatch
The Unlucky Lottery by Hakan Nesser
Destroying the Wrong by Evelyne Stone
Ice Strike by Steve Skidmore


readsbookonline.com Copyright 2016 - 2024