The Timekeeper (16 page)

“And you declined his offer, right?”

I shook my head, “I told him I would talk to you about it.” Darius studied me, and then turned to Drake looking for backup
.

“Is she just fucking with me? Please tell me she is just fucking with me, D.” Drake raised an eyebrow.

“I don’t believe so, she seemed quite serious. And FYI, every whiney thing he said to her was the truth. I listened to their entire interaction. That’s all I’m going to say
,
because this is none of my business.” He turned and walked down to the other end of the bar.

“What the shit, Ilana? What did he say to you? Why in the world would you even consider taking him back? After everything he did to you, after all the hell you went through because of him, you’re still considering it?” I took my second shot and thought about how to respond to the question. 

I’d make the final decision regardless of what he had to say. Giving him to option to discuss this situation was a courtesy. I needed to remember my place
.
I would never be the helpless little Princess I used to be when Zev screwed me over.

“The usual. I love you
.
I’m sorry
.
Forgive me
.
I haven’t slept with anyone since the last time we were together. You’re the only woman for me. He reminded me that he’s the Premier
.
He possesses more right to me than you do. Nothing he said to me changed my mind, the look on his face did. He’s in pain without me. I’d be lying to everyone if I claimed a small part of me didn’t ache for him.

“I told him I’d talk to you, but I want to remind you, I don’t need to. I can make this decision by myself, with no input from you. If you start copping an attitude with me, I’m going to ignore anything you’ve got to say
.
” I glanced at him quickly and went to running my finger along the edge of the tumbler
.

I could feel him glaring at me before he tossed one of his own shots back. He stared at the empty shot glass, considering the next one.

“I appreciate you are taking my opinion into consideration, especially when I know you’re not required to. I worry he’ll revert to acting the way he did when everything fell apart for the two of you. I couldn’t bear to see you in the anguish he caused you the first time
.
Now you’re asking me to do it again? Giving him the opportunity to cause the same misery for a second time is asinine. Do you remember when we met?” He never looked at my face, simply watched my finger glide around the edge of the glass in front of me.

“Yeah, I recall it vividly.” I expected him to do this
.
He had every right to remind me of what I was like when he met me. I needed to hear it to make sure I made the proper decision, even if I didn’t want to.

“You were complete wreck. You had Zev banished out of spite and saved him from beheading because you couldn’t stand the thought of his death
.
You wouldn’t trust anyone except Dexter. The affair with him ended shortly after I’d been assigned to you
,
and he married. Your tiny body was so full of hatred and fury
.
I had never anything like it in all of my years
,
and I still haven’t experienced anything close. You became consumed
,
you refused to function.

“It took decades to coerce you back into shape. I suffered every insult for ages until you trusted me, and even longer for you to accept love again from someone other than Dexter. I lived every second of pain with you, my love. I’ve never forgotten what it was like. I know Dex hasn’t either.” I finally let my eyes wander away from my drink
.

“It hasn’t slipped my memory. I never will. My ability to recollect isn’t making this any easier. What do you think I should do? You’ve been with me through thick and thin, your opinion matters to me. I understand the concern, but is it possible he really has changed? He’s still my husband, doesn’t he deserve another chance?”

He smiled sadly, “Az, I’ll stand by you no matter the final decision. I love you and I will continue to for the rest of my life, but I suggest you think long and hard before you decide. It’s not just my opinion that counts here. You need to speak to Dexter.” I raised my eyebrow.

“I take it you propositioned him already.”

“You make it sound so dirty, but yeah, I spoke to him.” He chuckled. I took a swig of my drink
.
I needed more alcohol
.
Maybe I should’ve gotten a triple
.

“What did he say?” I asked tentatively, unsure if I wanted the answer. I loved Dexter and the thought of him rejecting our possible marriage made me sick to my stomach.

“He wants to hear it from you. He’s interested, but he’s nervous about speaking to me. Granted, it was probably a little strange when his lover’s husband showed up on his doorstep with a marriage proposal. I would be skeptical too.” I looked back at my drink.

“I’ll talk to him after the next Council meeting. I’m not sure how he’s going to take this mess. Considering marrying him while starting a relationship back up with Zev at the same time. Will he even still be interested in marriage when he finds out that I’m even entertaining the idea?” Darius shook his head.

“Oh, I’m positive he’ll remain engrossed with you until his dying moments. He loves you like I’ve never seen someone love another person. Well, I haven’t seen myself look at you, but I’m sure it’s close. He seems to be a man so lost in love there may be no hope of saving him. He melts simply at the mention of your name. He reminds me of me. When I look at you and you don’t know I’m behind you, thinking about how lucky I am to be a part of your life
.
Dexter has that expression all the time. There’s a dreamy quality in his eyes.” I smiled.

I knew the look all too well. I saw Dexter when he thought I wasn’t paying attention. Every instance he took a sip of my blood you would have thought he found his place in heaven. When he wrapped his arms around me
,
and whenever he kissed me
.
Only Azul loved me like he did. Well, and Zev apparently.

“Are you okay with this? You’ve had me to yourself for so long you won’t know how to share. You think you truly prepared to ration me? You have never had to compete for my attention. Zev is used to dealing with Dex, and Dex is capable of coping with Zev. I’m not sure how you’re going to get along with everyone.”

Darius gave me a hearty laugh, “Trust me sweetie, I’ve been well aware you’ve been running around with Dex off and on throughout our marriage. After dealing with it for this long, I can handle it when it’s not behind my back.” I finished off the last of my drink, I wasn’t so sure.

Yeah, I felt bad about my affair. The issue with Azul focused on his possessiveness, and even though I had a right to do whatever I wanted
,
I wished to avoid the subject of my relationship with Dexter. We went a long while without seeing each other, when his wife was alive our liaisons fizzled into nonexistent, but after her death he became fair game again.

We’d resumed our affair in the past six hundred years or so, and it was still only off and on. I was busy or he was swamped. We’d been trying to meet somewhere in the middle but it left little time for us to actually be together.

“I’m sorry I should have said something. I didn’t think about it.” It was a copout.

“I knew, Az. I always did, you just let it slip your mind on purpose. While it would’ve been nice if you chose to say something, but I’m sure I didn’t make it easy. I’m well aware of how possessive and overbearing I can be. I put you in between a rock and a hard place. I’m not angry with you. However, if you don’t talk to him,
that
might just change.

“You need to be happy, and it takes more than one man to keep you content. I also desire your father to leave me the fuck alone. If things would’ve been different Dexter should’ve been your first husband. He has every right to be with you if you both agree to it.” I smiled at him. I had never expected him to understand, my father must seriously be raking him over the coals lately
.

“You really are the best, you know. I see one small problem with this master plan of yours. If I allow Zev back into my life and I marry Dex, two things are going to happen. I’ll be forced to notify the Council my marital status is changing again. It will substantially screw up my reincarnation cycles. I’m allowed twenty-five years off, per husband. They are
not
going to be happy campers.” I tapped the bar for another shot.

“I’ll also be required to tell Dad about this. Azazel doesn’t approve of Dex, at least he didn’t used to, and he’ll slink back to the depths of Hell before he allows Zev into the kingdom. He may overlook his dislike for Dexter if I tell him we’re planning children right away. The Council is going to have kittens about that too. The thought of me breeding more Demon-Djinn drives them demented, especially if my mate is a Vampire.

“They can’t do anything except bitch loudly. Maybe it’s time to call my position with those muffin-heads quits, after this lifetime. I’m getting too old for this shit, the Veil will fall before I die anyway.” I put my head in my hands and propped myself up against the bar.

“Honey, you’ve had a rough day. Let’s get you home. There is plenty of time to think about this before you die.” I wasn’t so sure the statement was accurate, not with two sets of Angels harassing me
.
It was only a matter of time before the Council sent their Assassins after me
.
I’d seen the plans in the fat bastard of a Chairman’s head when I had snuck up on him. He stood up and threw his arm around my shoulder. I gazed up at him
.
The Dragon was just as worn out as I was.

I slammed my last shot, slid out of my stool, and allowed him to lead me to the car.

Half drunk sitting in the car, I’d been thanking my lucky stars Darius planned on driving me. Getting home would’ve been substantially more difficult otherwise. All I wanted to do was curl up and sleep, but this evening promised to be anything but restful. My siesta didn’t seem to be on the menu tonight. I gazed out the window as we made our way up the canyon and into the mountains.

Darius remained silent for a long while before he decided on a topic that avoided any talk about relationships, for which I was grateful. Even in my drunken haze
,
I could tell something was bothering him. I couldn’t find the courage to ask.

“You got any idea why two Angels would want to kill you? The whole thing doesn’t make much sense. I’ve been thinking, if you die now the reincarnation cycle will be FUBAR’ed. Your death isn’t going to benefit God at all. Heaven tries to retain you here as long as possible. They would never send Angels after you, well, not unless you possessed information they wanted to keep quite. In which case they would ask you not to distribute said Intel. You’ve always been considered off limits.”

I hadn’t had much time to think about the situation, but even in my intoxicated state, his comments made sense. The Angels had no reason to attack me, despite what I’d done to screw with Heaven.

“Not a clue. I intend to ask Gideon the next time he decides to run into me. You’re right, Heaven wants me here, and I’m one of the few things from Aliis who makes their miserable jobs easier. I should’ve asked him when he came into the shop today, but Echo started harassing me about weddings and husbands.”

He chuckled, “Is she still bent out of shape she can only marry one at a time?” I nodded and immediately vowed never to do that again. My head was killing me and I just wanted to lie down.

“Where are we going?” I asked as he pulled off the highway and onto the frontage road.

“Sorry, I ran out of Fruity Snacks this afternoon. I gotta stop at the store real quick. Stay in the car, this will only take me a second.” I looked at the busy parking lot.

“King Soopers doesn’t carry Fruity Snacks.”

He nodded, “I’m aware
,
they’ve got something close enough to tide me over. I meant to stop at Costco, but I didn’t want to be late picking you up. Judging by the company you’d been keeping, I was on the right track for once
.
” I chuckled as he pulled into a parking space.

There’s something to be said about a man who knows what he wants, but my husband’s obsession with Fruity Snacks
-
not to be confused with just regular fruit snacks
-
was ridiculous. Personally, I wasn’t impressed in the least with any variety of gummies, not that my opinion mattered on the subject.

“I’ll be right back.” He told me as he jumped out the door. Yeah, okay, not a problem. I laid my head against the seat. We were almost home, and this day would be over. I aimed to crawl into bed and attempt to forget.

I closed my lids for a second, until I heard a knock on the window. I opened my eyes to find Gideon’s smiling face peering in at me. I rolled down the tinted glass and smirked.

“Funny, I never thought I would come across Angels in Conifer. Gideon, I get that withholding info from you is a matter you guys take seriously, but trying to kill me really isn’t in your best interest. It’s not like I’m going to tell you anything if I’m dead. This girl doesn’t get to go to Heaven.” He gave me a confused look.