The Throwaway Year (20 page)

At the gym
, Todd thanked her profusely for jogging with Kevin.

She forced her mind back from thoughts of Brian.
They had only managed to get worked up after their early morning make-out session. Maybe there would be time for a quickie before she left for work…  She suddenly remembered to respond to Todd.

“I didn’t mind at all.
He’s a good kid, plus I got to meet your wife. She’s really nice.”

Todd smiled to himself and she wondered if she should ask him about interracial dating.
They had developed a true friendship over these last few months, so why not? It wasn’t as if she was just being nosey, she actually felt as if she would be able to gain some perspective from someone who was going through it too.

“I’ve begun a
relationship with someone who’s a different color,” she began slowly.

He looked at her with interest.
“Is this your first time dating outside of your race?”

“Yes.”

“Ah. Is he a White guy?”

“Yeah.
Do you and Kia face any problems with issues of race?”

“No, not at all.
If our families have any problems with it, then they keep their concerns to themselves. Sometimes people look, but I can’t blame them for that. We’re a pretty dynamic couple.” He grinned.

“Kevin and Adrian’s father and I had some words
, but… well, that got squashed before Kia and I got married. Look, I expect that we will face some issues, but it won’t make or break us, you know? For the most part, I’m not even affected by someone’s racial intolerance. ‘A person beneath me can’t hurt me.’”

She liked that and nodded her agreement. “You are so right about that.”

“Kia told me that she liked you too. She asked me to invite you over for dinner some time. You should bring your new guy.”

She smiled when she thought back to when she had thought that nothing in this year would really matter.
In actuality, she had found love and new friends, and most importantly of course, she had found herself.

“We’ll definitely do that, thank you Todd.”
She slowed her treadmill down to a walk and Todd looked at her curiously.

“After the Zombie Run
, I’ll only be coming to the gym three times a week.”

He grinned.
“I think that’ll be fine Hayden.”

She looked ahead thoughtfully as she continued at a fast wal
k.  “I know it seemed excessive, having to be here every single day, but…”  Todd slowed his treadmill to a walk. “You weren’t just working out your body; you were working out something deeper. I understood that.”

She nodded and then returned her treadmill back to a jog.

~***~

To your man
, you are the sun, the moon and the planet that his life orbits around.  It is through those eyes that he knows the extent to which he can be loved.

Hayden read the affirmation that Brian had texted to her.
It made her eyes sting that he could care as deeply for her as she did for him. It was not something she was accustomed to. In her old life, she had been grateful for just the attention of a handsome man.  Yet now, someone else expressed how grateful he was for her interest. It didn’t make her feel powerful or bold, but humbled that she could illicit those feelings in someone.

How was it possible that she could see this man every single day and still her heartbeat would race whenever he sent her a message on her phone
, or she looked forward to the sight of him? That was easy; she had fallen deeply in love with him and that love was mutual.  Brian and Hayden were nearly inseparable whenever possible; if he didn’t sleep at her house, then she slept at his. Each weekend they did overtime hours together at work, and then spent the rest of the weekend enjoying each other’s company.

Soon Mr. Fox
decided that the company had more than caught up and they all resumed a regular work schedule.  By that time, Hayden had banked several thousand dollars and in actuality, she was finally in a position to quit her second job. Except that her four hours at Fox Vinyl no longer felt like work. She enjoyed her new work team, but she couldn’t continue like this forever.

Mr. Fox gave Brian much more responsibility and Hayden could see the sense of pride in her man because of it.
Mr. Fox took some well-needed time off from work, leaving Brian in charge when he was out of the office. She could see that their relationship had improved tenfold. He no longer barked orders at his only son and in turn, Brian didn’t seem to hate every waking second that he spent working beneath the man.

Hayden texted Brian back after reading his affirmation twice more.

“Your woman loves her man.
See you tonight honey.”

Todd and Kevin pulled up just then and
she stowed away her cell phone and then prepared for her jog.

“Only two
more weeks,” Todd said.

“Me and Dad
– I mean Todd!” Kevin looked embarrassed about his faux-pas. Hayden and Todd both hid smiles and pretended not to notice. He was doing it more and more often and Todd confessed that he felt torn.

He wanted to invite the boys to refer to him as their father
. Yet Todd didn’t want to appear to be taking over a role held by their biological father—who actually had a very good relationship with them. So the two friends spent some time thinking of nick-names like Pops, Ol’ man, Daddy, etc., but Todd nixed them all. It was obvious that he just wanted to be Dad.

“Um, we found some c
ool costumes for the Zombie Run,” Kevin continued.

“Oh yeah,” Todd added.
“We decided to be Team Zombie.” As the trio began their slow jog, Hayden grimaced.

“I have to dress up like a
zombie? I thought the runners were supposed to be chased by zombies?”

“Well…
we got caught,” Todd replied.

“Okay…
so are we going to do all the bloody wounds?”

“Yes!” Kevin replied in excitement.
“Todd stabbed some old t-shirts and put fake blood on them and then we’re going to wear zombie makeup.”

Hayden smiled
at Kevin’s youthful excitement. “I’m on board.” Just two weeks until October 30
th
.

She wondered if she would be ready and then she stopped doubting herself.
She had run a mini 10K a week ago and had finished it in mere minutes. She was ready for this. Plus she was part of a team, not by herself – Team Zombie!

~***~

Monday evening, Hayden floated into Fox Vinyl on the wings of a dove. Before she knew it she would face the marathon, and at that point she would cut her gym visits down by half, leaving her more time in the morning to cuddle and kiss. She looked forward to that, and pretty soon she would have to face another decision—it was time to quit Fox Vinyl. She hadn’t discussed it with Brian, but she was tired. She wanted to do things that normal people did, like go to a movie, read a book, or just have time to stand still and do nothing.

Tomorrow
would be exactly six months since she had embarked on her journey. In six months she had gained so much, but it was time to return to her life. She carried her and Brian’s lunches into the canteen. It had remained clean and to keep it that way, everyone pitched in. It also helped that the current workers were those that actually weren’t using the job only as a means to facilitate their next drug fix. The drug testing continued and a dress code policy of business casual work wear was instituted.

After eating
, Brian gathered up their trash. “Your place or mine?”

“Mine.
Tonight I want to talk about something important.”

“Oh?”
He quirked up a brow.

“Nothing scary.”
It was time to tell him that she was putting in her two weeks notice. It had to be done even though she would miss this place and all the people here.

He leaned in and pecked her on the lips.
“Okay honey. I have to finish payroll, so I’ll be in the office if you need anything. Will you keep your eye open for any problems?”

“Of course baby.”

~***~

Hayden was marking the board later in the night when the front door opened.
She had never changed her desk, so she was always the first to see someone enter or leave. She was surprised when she saw Marcus Miller walk in.

She hoped that he wouldn’t want his old job back.
Mr. Fox would definitely squash that idea. Maybe he had just left some of his personal property behind and just wanted to pick it up. They hadn’t thrown his personal effects out, but had kept them in a shoebox in Mr. Fox’s office instead.

Marcus looked at her and then seemed surprised.
His eyes quickly scanned her form leaving her a little uncomfortable.

“Hi Marcus.” What did she
say to a person that was carried out in handcuffs the last time she’d seen him?
Hope jail wasn’t very bad… Why are you out already? Why are you here?

He gave her a distracted look.
“I see that fucker didn’t waste no time replacing me did he?”

Hayden’s mouth dropped.

“Low down dirty snitching dog… just low down.” He muttered under his breath and then Hayden realized that Marcus was high on something.

“His own kid steals from him
, but I do a little somthin’ somthin’ and he wants to send
me
to jail? Fuck him!” Marcus snapped and Hayden took a step backwards. He pimp walked across the aisle to Brian’s old desk. Another employee was sitting there and she looked up in surprise.

“Where that
motha fucker at?”

Hayden quickly backed out of the room.
She darted to the office, her heartbeat slamming against her chest. She hurriedly opened the door and Brian looked up from the computer. The smile dropped from his face at her panicked expression.

“Brian!
Marcus is out there and he’s really messed up on something!”

Brian stood up just as loud shouting cou
ld be heard from the main room.  Marcus was yelling and she could hear Abdullah’s low voice, sounding as if he was trying to reason with him.  There were times when people knew that their lives were about to permanently change, and in that second as she heard several people scream, Hayden knew that something horrible was about to happen and that it would forever change her.

Brian rushed forward just as the office door crashed open and Hayden turned in time to see Marcus standing in the door holding a gun.
It was pointed at them! Fear froze her blood cold, but Brian was like a locomotive as he sprang forward. An explosion of sound engulfed her as Marcus repeatedly fired.

It took only one second from the time he appeared in the door firing the gun,
until the angry sneer dropped from his face, replaced by one of surprise as Hayden was flung half around by the force of a bullet hitting her.  She felt one brief punch in her chest that took her breath away and as she fell face first to the floor, she saw Brian’s body fold. He was still trying to get to Marcus and she wanted to say
stop.
Stop Brian, he’s going to keep shooting you honey, stop…
but Hayden’s world went black before she could say anything.

“Hayden!
Hayden!” She tried to open her eyes, but she was simply too tired. Oh! She had to get up and go to the gym.

In her mind
, she pictured her dragging herself out of the bed and going through her familiar morning routine. She was pounding the treadmill, but it was too hard to breath. Damn, it was almost like running for the first time. In her mind, she climbed down and dropped to her knees trying to find her breath, but she couldn’t.

~***~

Hayden clawed at her throat as she tried to gulp down a choking breath.  Something was in her mouth and she couldn’t breathe past it. She pulled it and felt a tube far back in her throat but hands quickly stopped her, gripping her wrists gently but firmly.

“Hayden!
Doctor, someone, she’s awake!”

Hayden blinked in panic as she tried to find her breath beyond the tube that was buried down her throat.
Brian’s pale face was there and the sight of it shocked her. He was holding her wrists and she wanted to explain that she couldn’t breathe, that she was dying. Yet for some reason, he just looked happy.

Someone hurried into the room and a man dressed in a white lab coat stared into her eyes.
“Cough Hayden. Cough and I’m going to pull out the breathing tube.”

She tried to cough
, but she still had no breath, however the tube was quickly pulled from her mouth in one swift but smooth motion and she immediately gulped down precious air.