The Secret Ingredient (14 page)

There was something seriously wrong.

She put down her tray and slipped off her apron to go and meet him but before she could say anything he marched past her in stony silence and headed straight for the stairs.

Running after him, with a quick shrug to Gloria, Lottie was out of breath by the time she reached the studio.

He was pacing back and forth like a caged animal, his phone pressed to one ear. Then he flung it down on the bed and tore open the patio doors, practically jumping onto the terrace.

Lottie pressed one hand to her chest and willed her heart to slow down to the point where she could speak.

‘Rob, you’re frightening me. What’s happened? Is something wrong?’

His shoulders rolled back as though he was bracing himself to tell her some terrible news and when his voice did break the horrible silence, it was as cold and terrible as ice.

‘Mum’s gone missing. Not answering her phone. Nobody knows where she is. I don’t even know where to start.’

Lottie coughed and took gentle hold of his arm.

‘But that’s not true. Adele is with Ian. He phoned less than five minutes ago to let me know that Adele is in a department-store changing room buying a new dress for a cocktail party she’s been invited to. She forgot to charge her phone so he thought he had better let me know where she was. In case we were worried. Oh, Rob.’

His face twisted into relief then fury and then relief again. ‘She went shopping. With Ian? Is that what you’re telling me?’

Lottie smiled and held her arms out to hug him. ‘She is fine. Ian met her after breakfast and they’re on the way to the gallery now. Ten minutes’ walk away at most.

‘You can stop panicking, Rob.’

But instead of embracing her and letting her ease away his anxiety and concern, Rob turned back to the railing and his fingers clasped around the back of the patio chair so fiercely that his knuckles were almost white under the pressure.

‘She is not fine. Has Ian any idea of what I’ve just been through?’ Each word was almost spat out into the air through his clenched teeth.

‘Hey.’ Lottie tried to smile but failed. ‘It was good of him to be so considerate.’

‘Considerate? Is that what you call it? How about calling me first? Now, that would have been considerate.’

‘Well, he might have done if he had your phone number. But seeing as he didn’t and Adele couldn’t remember it, he phoned me instead and then was going to call the gallery to let them know they were going to be delayed. I happen to think that is very considerate.’

‘Do you, indeed?’ Rob nodded and blew out hard. ‘Then you don’t have the faintest idea what you’re talking about. Because I have been down this road before.’

Then he stepped back and dropped his head. ‘A few years ago my mum had planned to hold an exhibition in New York with a few friends. Private gallery, exclusive, serious pieces from some of the finest contemporary artists. She was so looking forward to it that she insisted I take time out to have a holiday with Sean and my dad and the whole extended family in the new Beresford Miami. Have a real break for once.’

A hard, low laugh shook his shoulders and Rob lifted his head and looked at Lottie. ‘The gallery was broken into the night before the exhibition and they took everything. Three years’ work—gone, stolen. Can you imagine how destroyed she was? Of course, I offered to try and help with the police reports and the whole mess. But no. She insisted that I leave it to the police to deal with. My family holiday was far more important.’

Rob started to pace up and down the hard wooden flooring. ‘When I got back to the penthouse in New York she had moved out. Just gone, no messages, no notes. No clue as to where she was. Do you understand what that felt like? It took me three frantic days to track her down. She had gone to the Hamptons to be alone because she didn’t want anyone to see her in the dark days of a big depression that could last for weeks.’

His eyes closed for a second and when they opened again some of her Rob was back.

So that when he reached out and took her hands in his she wanted to fall into his arms and tell him that she was sorry and that it would work out if he gave them a chance.

But he whipped that moment away from her before she even opened her lips.

‘I am sorry, Lottie. But this is yet another reason why it’s time that we should be going. And soon.’

‘Going? What do you mean “going”?’

‘I need to get back to California. That’s where my work is, and I’m taking my mother with me. I am so sorry, Lottie, I really am.’

Lottie folded her arms. ‘California? You’re leaving, just like that. Exactly who do you think you are talking to? I’m not Debra. You can’t mess me around like this, Rob. It’s not fair.’

He whirled around to face her with a look of total fury.

Rob stomped forward and leant towards Lottie until she could feel his hot, bitter breath on her face. ‘That’s where you’re wrong. You’re precisely the same as Debra. And don’t you dare say that I didn’t tell you the rules.’

She shook her head and her gaze scanned his wrecked and tragic face.

‘Stay. You owe me two more lessons, remember? And don’t shake your head like that. We’re clever people—we can work this out.’

‘I have to be the one who’s walking away, before that day comes when I’m forced to decide who to put first. Because that isn’t fair on either of us. I’m sorry. I truly am.’

His arms tightened, drawing her to him, and he held her there against his chest as though it was the last time they would share this precious connection.

Tears welled in her eyes at the very idea that he was walking out on her for the best reason in the world.

No, this could not be happening. Not when they had only just found one another.

It took all of her strength but she slowly pushed Rob away so that she slid out of his arms. She yearned for his touch but she knew what had to be done.

‘No, Rob, no. I’m not going to let you do this to yourself. You asked me to take a chance on you. Well, now it’s my turn. Change the rules. Find the love you need, right here.’

‘Every time I take a chance on love it’s snatched from me one way or another. That’s why I need to move on before you create a hole in my heart and my soul that nothing else can fill. I’m not taking the risk, for both of our sakes.’

He instinctively stepped forwards to hold her but she pressed hard against his solid chest.

‘Move on? Oh, Rob, I saw my parents waste the best years of their lives living in quiet desperation, living a lie and denying their love in case the sadness and despair seeped out between the cracks. My mother had three precious months with the love of her life before giving him up. Why? Because she was too afraid of hurting the other people in her life. And do you know what? She regretted it from the moment she got back to London. And no matter how hard she tried and how much effort she made, it did not make one bit of difference.’

Lottie caressed Rob’s face with her fingertip and saw his eyelids flutter at her touch.

‘That’s not good enough, Rob. I want more than three months with the man I care about. I want a lifetime, and we can have that. No! Hear me out. Adele is real and honest and true. She doesn’t live a lie. She never has. She is one of the bravest people that I have ever met. Just like her son. Talk to her—talk to her today.’

‘Lottie, it has to be this way.’

‘I don’t agree. I care about you and want to be with you.’

Then she slid her hands down his chest until only her fingertips were in contact with his body.

‘Go! Go and do what you have to do. But only come back to me if you are prepared to go the whole way. I feel that I’ve only just started to get to know the real Robert Beresford, but you need to open up and give me everything of yourself, not just the part that you want other people to see. And if you’re not prepared to do that, then perhaps you should go. And not come back.’

The words caught in her throat but she managed to squeeze them out before turning to the balcony so that she did not have to see him leave in silence.

Each of his footsteps on the wooden stair drove a stake into her heart, but it was only when the kitchen door slammed shut that she finally let go of the railing and slipped back into the bedroom. That way, Rob could not see her collapsed onto the floor, overwhemed by floods of bitter tears for the empty space he had created in her life.

TWELVE

Rob walked slowly
through the newly refurbished Beresford Richmond dining room and mentally checked off his list of essential must-haves. Simple, clean lines blended with pale polished wood and cream-and-biscuit shades in the decor and furnishings to create a warm, welcoming ambience. No fussy red velvet or snootiness here.

His mother’s connections to wonderful artists had helped the Beresford hotel group to collect a fine art collection that perfectly matched the contemporary styling.

The whole room had been created with one purpose in mind.

To allow the guests to relax and enjoy sumptuous food and wine in a comfortable and luxurious setting without old-school formality. This was all about the diners and the food.

And it worked. The awards and food-critic plaudits were flooding in.

He should be proud of what they had achieved.

Instead, his mind had been a blur of uncertainty and doubt from the minute Lottie had told him to leave.

He didn’t blame her.

Rob ran one hand over his face and blinked himself awake.

Sleep had come in fits and starts and every dreaming moment was filled with the memory of how he had held Lottie in his arms and the way her long hair flowed out onto the pillow when asleep.

Damn. He had it bad.

But he had made the right decision. For both of them.

‘Hey, I thought you were heading back today.’

Sean strolled out from the kitchens with his fingers wrapped around a napkin.

‘Hey yourself. I am going today. And don’t get crumbs on my floor.’

Sean replied with a snort and took one last bite of the new range of savoury pastries. ‘These choux buns—’ he smiled between swallows ‘—are amazing. Three kinds of cheese. Hint of paprika. Our white-wine aficionados are going to be in heaven.’

Rob shook his head and tried to smile back but his mouth was too tight with tension as he remembered the moment that had inspired that recipe. Cheesy bites at an art gallery.

‘Was that the only reason you called me down here this morning?’

‘Nope, I have news. I had a very long X-rated chat with my one true love, Miss Dee Flynn, last evening, and we have finally set a date for our wedding. What are you doing last week in September—apart from being my best man?’

Rob roared with laughter and slapped Sean on the back so hard it almost sent him flying.

‘That’s wonderful news. Congratulations. You’re a lucky man.’

‘I know it. You’re doing the meal. Seven-course extravaganza. Best food you ever came up with in your life, right? And you’ve got to have these cheese things as canapés.’

‘Damn right.’ Rob grinned then man-slapped Sean again. ‘The best of the best, I guarantee it.’

‘Ah. But it gets even better. The lovely Charlotte Rosemount is the chief bridesmaid and creator of the wedding cake.’

‘Lottie is making your wedding cake? What about me?’

‘Bride gets to choose. But you, my friend, have the pleasure of slow dancing with Lottie at my wedding. Now that I want to see.’

Rob sucked in a long breath, then narrowed his eyes. He remembered only too clearly what had happened the last time he danced with Lottie.

‘Have I just been set up?’

‘By experts,’ Sean replied, and rubbed the palms of his hands together.

‘This is how it works. I know Adele and Ian are more than just friends and that’s great. So great that I’ve already told Adele that she can stay in this hotel as long as she wants.’

‘No, I’ve got that covered,’ Rob tried to interrupt but Sean stopped him.

‘Not this time, matey. You’re stuck with a family who does not let one of their own deal with their problems alone, especially when you’re the only one around here who seems to be blind to the fact that you’re walking away from one of the best things that ever happened to you.’

Sean rapped Rob hard in the centre of his forehead. ‘Lottie is good for you. Deal with it.’

‘Me, in a long-term relationship? That would be a first.’

‘Then we have something else in common. I adore Dee and it breaks me when we are apart but I am so crazy in love with that girl that nothing in my life comes close. You deserve some of that happiness, Rob. You’ve kept your promise to Adele and paid in advance for some time to enjoy your life. And why are you shaking your head like that?’

‘Lottie needs someone who can make her happy and love her the way she deserves. She wants one hundred per cent of who they are. That’s not me. I’m like Mum, always looking for the next rush where each relationship has an expiry date. I’m not built for the long term.’

‘What are you saying? That Lottie’s not worth fighting for? That she’s not good enough for you?’

‘Don’t say that. Don’t you dare ever say that! She is the best woman I’ve ever met. If there’s a problem, it’s with me. Stop looking at me like that. It’s freaky.’

‘That’s because I’ve never seen the mighty Rob Beresford in love before. Yes, there you go. I used the
L
word and your name in the same sentence. Actually, come to think of it, that is a little freaky. And it’s certainly going to take some getting used to. But I think I am up to it.’

Sean crumpled the napkin into a ball and crushed it in his fist.

‘Your call, brother. You can stay on the same track you’re on now and end up as cranky old Uncle Rob to the stunningly gorgeous and talented children that Dee and I plan to produce in the near future, or, and here’s a thought, you’d better grab Lottie before some other lucky man snaps her up on the rebound.’

* * *

‘Lottie, you have a visitor.’ Gloria rolled her eyes towards the front door and bared her teeth in a wide-mouthed scream before shaking her fingers out and blowing on the tips.

‘Who is it? Not that hot bloke who wanted to join the Bake and Bitch club so that he could pick up women?’

‘Well, that sounds like fun. Where do I sign up?’

Rob!

Lottie refused to turn around and give him the satisfaction of seeing her flushed face and neck. Instead she had a full-frontal view as the women gathered around the table clutched at one another, open-mouthed, and started a chain of whispers between staring at Rob in disbelief.

‘Ladies, it’s a huge pleasure to meet you all. Lottie has told me so much about you. I hope you don’t mind but I brought along a stack of signed recipe books, which I hope you find useful. I think there should be enough for everyone. There you are. Enjoy.’

A large box slid onto the table on her left side and before she could say anything the girls flung open the lid and attacked the contents, pulling out book after book with huge squeals of glee and delight.

The next thing Lottie knew, Rob had sneaked closer and she could feel his warm breath on her neck as he whispered into her ear. ‘Can you spare me five minutes? I need to talk about Dee and Sean.’

‘Hello, I am running a Bake and Bitch club here. Sorry, way too busy.’

‘Ladies, I’m so sorry to interrupt but I need to steal Lottie away for a short time. Ladies?’

Not one reply. The girls were having far too much fun taking photos of Rob with their smartphones and diving into the pages of the recipe book, oohing and whistling at the full-colour photographs of the baked extravaganzas.

Traitors!

‘Five minutes. But that’s it.’

Lottie whirled around away from the man whose very presence was making her heart sing, marched into the main part of the tea rooms, and sat down at the table closest to the entrance, her hands neatly folded in her lap.

‘Five minutes. Say what you have to say, then on your way. Time starts now.’

Focusing on the pattern on the tiled floor, Lottie heard and felt Rob pull out a chair and sit down opposite her.

She desperately wanted to look at him but her mind was too busy trying to process the tsunami of feelings that just sitting in the same room had washed over her. It staggered her that one human being could be responsible for sending her senses into such stomach-clenching, mind-reeling chaos.

‘Lottie. Nice to see you again.’

‘I thought you’d already left for California, so you can imagine my surprise at seeing you this evening.’

A muscular arm extended across the table towards her. It was covered in a dark grey silky fabric and she knew that the tip of the tattoo that peeked out from below the pristine pale grey shirt ended in a curving blade design across his left shoulder where her fingers had caressed his skin only a few days earlier.

And her heart broke so badly at the memory that she had to blink away the sharp sting of tears.

She wanted to hold him close and relive those precious moments in his arms and feel the heat of his mouth on hers once more before they were finally separated by thousands of miles of ocean.

Instead she had to lift her chin and pretend that she was uninterested and cool to the point of ice.

‘Work. Sean needed some help at the hotel. I could have phoned and made an appointment but I had a sneaky suspicion that you would have put the phone down on me so here I am, in person, ready to take it in the chest. So fire away, Lottie. Let me have it with both barrels. Because the sooner we get this over with and start working together, the better.’

‘Working together!’ Lottie shot up out of her chair, fingers tented on the table, and stared at him, wide-eyed with disbelief. ‘What gives you that idea?’

‘Apparently my brother is marrying the magnificent Miss Dervla Flynn. I am in charge of the reception but you, my lovely, are making the wedding cake for one of the most prestigious weddings that the Beresford clan have ever seen. You and me, rocking the food. It’s going to be outstanding.’

Somebody in the Bake and Bitch club laughed out loud, probably Gloria, and the sound of the London traffic echoed through the glass and made the floor shake a little. But Lottie did not hear a thing. She was way too busy trying to process what she had just heard. And failing.

‘Dee wants me to make her wedding cake?’ Lottie asked.

‘She’s ringing you tonight from Beijing.’

‘Beijing. Right. Oh, my.’

Suddenly her legs felt like jelly and Lottie sat back down in her chair.

Rob pulled his chair around a little closer to hers and stretched out his arms so that his fingers were only inches from hers.

‘What do you say, Lottie?’ There was just enough hesitation in his voice to make her pay attention. ‘Do you think you could put up with me for a few weeks while we work out how to make this wedding the best it can be?’

He tilted his head and smiled one of those sweet, heartbreaking smiles.

‘Sean is important to me and I know that Dee thinks the world of you. It wouldn’t surprise me in the least if you already know what kind of wedding cake she wants for her big day. Was that a nod?’

‘Two stacks of individual cakes with the name of each guest piped on. Every one different and totally, totally delicious. It’s going to be the most important order of my life.’

She exhaled slowly and swallowed down an egg-sized lump of emotion. ‘They’re really getting married?’ she whispered.

Rob nodded his head up and down. Very slowly. ‘They really are. According to Sean I’m his best man and you are the head bridesmaid. Full details to follow the minute she gets back.’

‘Wow,’ Lottie choked and lifted one hand. ‘I’m going to need a moment here. And what’s in that cake box?’

‘I made a courting cake. For you. It’s a bit of a northern tradition but I thought I would give it a twist.’

‘A courting cake? You march away from me in the middle of an argument just to prove a point and then you have the nerve to turn up with a
courting
cake? What are you trying to say, Rob? That you expect me to forgive you for treating me as a poor second best when it comes to deciding where your priorities lie? Well, newsflash. I’ve had enough of being told what to do and what to say and being generally lied to and pushed around as though my feelings don’t matter. I’m not putting up with any of that behaviour. Not any more, and especially not from you. So you can take your cake and give it to someone who has such a low opinion of herself that she’s willing to put up with you. And good luck to her because she’s going to need it. Goodbye and goodnight.’

‘Finished yet?’ he asked in a semi-serious voice.

She took a couple of breaths. ‘Yes, I think so.’

‘Good,’ Rob replied and slid the cake box across the table in front of her. ‘Because it sounds to me like you need some sugar. Try the cake. You might even like it.’

Lottie reached for the box and then whipped her hand back.

‘Wait a minute. If I eat this cake it means that we are officially dating! You scoundrel! Keep that cake well away from me. No way. You heard what I said the other day.’

Rob grinned, opened up the lid, and wafted the box under Lottie’s nose, pushed it even closer and then sat back in his chair.

‘It’s lemon drizzle.’

She pushed it back towards him. ‘You cheat. That’s wicked.’

‘I know.’ And he pushed it towards her again. ‘But my mum suggested you might like it. Right after she told me in no uncertain terms that she had been taking her medication since the last painting was complete and that Ian has asked her to dinner and she has said yes. Don’t look at me like that. I like him and Ian is a remarkable photographer. He would love California and my mum cannot wait to show it to him. On her own. Apparently three is a crowd.’

‘Ian and Adele? Oh, I’m so pleased.’ Lottie grinned and reached out to take Rob’s hand and then pulled it back again. ‘Are you going to sabotage them?’

‘No. He cares about her. Good and bad days don’t matter. I think they will be happy together. In fact, I am relying on it. You see, my mother fired me. I am now officially redundant. My services as a full-time minder are no longer required. Apparently I have looked out for her long enough and it’s time for me to start enjoying myself in a totally selfish manner.’

‘Wow. How are you coping with that?’ Lottie whispered. And it was her Rob who grinned back in reply. ‘I’m getting used to the idea that it would break her heart if I let my chance of love pass me by. Just because I’m too scared of letting a woman see me for the man that I have become.’