Read The Room on the Second Floor Online
Authors: T A Williams
The Room on the Second Floor
Douglas Scott finds nothing more exciting than doing what he shouldn’t. So when he discovers an irresistibly devilish ancient royal decree, he’s determined to put it to good use. After all, opening the country’s only legal brothel right under his best friend’s nose is just the latest in a list of tricks he’s pulled – and he always comes out on top!
But the further Douglas gets into the oldest profession, the more he realises what a complicated game it is to play. And when an attempted murder wreaks havoc on Toplingham Manor, he wonders if he might just have made the biggest mistake of his life…
‘I loved the idea for this book. It is written with a dry wit that had me laughing out loud on occasions… [and] turning the pages right till the end.’ 5 stars from CB
*
‘
Dirty Minds
is a very entertaining story with an intriguing plot. T A Williams manages to hold the reader’s attention not just with his amusing depictions of lust and lingerie, but also with the gradual development of love and affection between the main characters.’ 5 stars from Ian Muirhead
*
‘Those looking for a good read, a good chuckle and a good time…have come to the right place. I look forward to the next title by T A Williams.’ 5 stars from Roger Syrat
*
‘I really enjoyed this book! I wasn’t sure what to expect, but it turned out to be lovely. A group of very different people find themselves writing an erotic novel together, and there is sex drama galore, complete with some really cute love stories.’ 5 stars from Jackie at Goodreads
‘
Dirty Minds
is a very funny story…a story with a real plot, and characters that have that real feel to them.’ 5 stars from Lexxie at unconventionalbookreviews.com
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Review taken from Amazon
Dirty Minds
The Room on the Second Floor
T A Williams
TREVOR WILLIAMS
lives in Devon with his Italian wife. He lived and worked in Switzerland, France and Italy, before returning to run one of the best-known language schools in the UK. He has taught people from all over the world, among them Arab princes, Brazilian beauty queens and Italian billionaires. He speaks a number of languages and has travelled extensively. He has eaten snake, live fish and alligator. A Spanish dog, a Russian bug and a Korean parasite have done their best to eat him in return. He has written historical novels, humorous books and thrillers. His hobby is long-distance cycling, but his passion is writing. You can follow him on Twitter,
@TAWilliamsBooks
, or visit his website:
www.tawilliamsbooks.com
Contents
My thanks to Tony Stevenson and David Bricknell for their classical and legal expertise
And thanks, as ever, to my editor, Clio Cornish, whose input is always so valuable.
With thanks to Mariangela and Christina for their support
With love
HENRICUS dei gratia rex Angliae dux Normannorum praemio pro hospitio abundanti sibi praebito ab Arturo Toplinghamensi necessario DECERNIT ut manerium Toplingham in Devoniae comitatu in perpetuum ad praeclarum quaestum meretricium faciendum iure ac merito nemine obstante neque impediente permaneat et hic subscribit die xiii julii anno regni nostri xxxi.
The campus clock struck four. She went over to the post tray and started collecting the day’s letters. As she bent forward, she sensed eyes on her. Turning round, her heart sank. She saw it was Edgar Lean, lurking at the open door of her office. She wasn’t the sort of girl who would ever want to be rude to anybody, but his habit of sneaking up on her had started to give her the creeps. Nevertheless, she managed to summon up a weak smile. Confrontation wasn’t her way.
‘Afternoon, Linda.’
‘Good afternoon, Edgar.’
‘Anything I can help you with?’ He was staring at her fixedly. His eyes were wide open, unblinking.
‘No, I’m fine thanks.’ As always, she felt uncomfortable in his presence. She nodded towards the pile of letters. ‘Sorry I can’t stop and talk. I’m afraid I’m busy.’ She turned her back on him, hoping he would take the hint.
All was quiet for a minute or two. Then, behind her, she heard steps. There was a movement and, to her horror, she felt a touch on her bottom. She squeaked with indignation and spun round.
But Edgar Lean had left. In his place, she was confronted with the tall figure of Roger Dalby, an expression of embarrassment on his face. Now, he was a very different kettle of fish. Her indignation left her and she gave him a warm smile.
‘Hi, Linda, sorry if I startled you.’ He was carrying a large cardboard box. The dog-eared label read,
12
th
-century records
. The dust-covered box looked little younger than the contents. The corner that had bumped into her gaped open. Ancient sticky tape looked to be the only thing holding it together.
‘Sorry about that. I wasn’t really paying attention.’
Nothing new there. He rarely left the twelfth century. She leant forward to give him a hand. Just at that very moment, the box finally gave way.
‘Oh, blast.’
Papers cascaded onto the floor. He dropped to his knees and started collecting them up again.
‘Here, let me help you.’
She knelt down beside him and started picking up grubby old files, marked variously
Knights Templar
,
Bernard of Clairvaux
and
Cistercians
. He raised his eyes towards her. Her face was little more than a foot from his. So close, he could smell her perfume. For one crazy moment he wondered what would happen if he were to throw his arms around her and kiss her.
But that was not his way, either.
The papers all collected, she stood up again.
‘Roger.’
He looked up sheepishly from the floor.
‘This letter has just come in. It looks important. Maybe you should open it straightaway.’ She held it out to him as he pulled himself to his feet. He carefully placed his papers on the table before taking the letter from her, relishing the slight physical contact as their fingers touched.
The long, stiff envelope was marked Private and Confidential. To be opened by the recipient in person.
‘Very formal. Who on earth can that be from?’ He was puzzled.
‘It seems to be a firm of solicitors, if you look on the back of the envelope.’ She suddenly blushed. ‘Not that I’ve been…I mean I wouldn’t…’ Her voice tailed off, but he was quick to reassure her.
‘Of course not, Linda. Now let’s see…um… Henderson Brothers and Healy. A local firm. Definitely legal by the looks of it. Here’s hoping it’s not a summons.’
He took the proffered paper knife and carefully made an incision. Inside were a number of folded sheets. He opened the covering letter and read it. As he did so, his eyes widened. He broke into reading out loud.
‘
Acting in accordance with the wishes of Mr Eustace McKinnon (deceased), as expressed in his last will and testament…
My word, I don’t believe it…
Toplingham Manor…all the land and appurtenances…
Good lord, Linda, Uncle Eustace has died and he’s…he’s…’ His voice faltered. She leapt towards him protectively.
He slumped into his chair and took a big gulp of air before continuing in shocked tones, ‘I do believe Uncle Eustace has left me a fortune.’
Linda stood beside the chair and debated whether a peck on the cheek would be appropriate, given the circumstances. All her instincts were crying out to throw her arms around his neck and smother him in kisses, but, as ever, she controlled herself. In the end, she contented herself with a few words of encouragement.
The news went round the university like wildfire. Within a very few days, everybody had heard of Roger’s good fortune and the way this would affect his plans for the future. And theirs. Not everybody was pleased.
‘You’ve heard the news?’ Amanda could see she had.
‘Mmh.’ Rosie was staring miserably into the remains of her cappuccino. Term had officially finished and the all the undergraduates had fled. Along with a few other postgrads, the two girls were just about the only people in the coffee bar. ‘I heard yesterday. Linda told me. It won’t be the same place without him.’
‘Yes, and she’s going too.’
‘Linda? Leaving the uni?’ This was news to Rosie. ‘What’s she going to do?’
‘What do you think? She’s going with the prof. He needs somebody to look after him. He’d probably starve to death if she wasn’t there to remind him to eat. We all know that.’ Roger Dalby’s all-consuming obsession with his medieval saint was common knowledge around the campus. People still recounted the story of him walking into the fountain while trying to decipher a medieval parchment. He splashed straight across and out the other side, but he managed it without getting the parchment wet.
‘You make him sound like an old codger. He’s only thirty-eight.’ There was a slight pause. ‘And he’s an Aries.’
‘How on earth do you know that? Have you been stalking the poor man?’
Rosie nodded, unrepentant. ‘University records are open to the public, you know. Anyway, I’d take that job any day.’ Her face assumed a dreamy expression. ‘I’d like to look after all his needs.’ She sighed. ‘And a few of my own.’
‘Well, it looks like Linda’s beaten you to it. Well, maybe not all his needs, mind you. I still don’t think there’s anything going on between those two. But you’ve only got a few weeks left to make your move, and then he’s off.’
‘Doesn’t give me a lot of time. There must be some way to attract his attention.’
‘You could strip naked and sprawl across his desk with a copy of
Vitae Sancti Bernardi Abbatis
covering your modesty.’
‘Two problems there, Mandy. First, his desk is so covered with piles of paper, he wouldn’t see me. Second, there’s only one copy in the university and Ed’s had it for months.’
‘I’m not so sure I would want any book Edgar’s touched lying on my naked body.’ Amanda shuddered at the thought.
‘Oh, he’s not so bad, really. Underneath that geeky exterior, there lurks a geeky interior.’ Both girls laughed.
‘Talk of the devil.’ Amanda saw him first. Edgar Lean was shambling towards them, dead to the world. His headphones blotted out the noise of the coffee bar and his eyes, as usual, rarely lifted from his toes. ‘Why don’t you ask him for the book back? If you like, I’ll tell him what you want it for.’