The Romeo Club (5 page)

When C.C. went back into the dressing area, I uncovered my face. “At least we might have a suspect in the great ‘Mom’s missing bra’ caper.”

“Yeah, I bet he’s got it under the seat of the car.” Trey nudged me with his elbow.

“Ew. I think I just threw up in my mouth.” I pushed away from the wall and gazed out the windows into the main area of the mall. There, standing directly across from the store I was in, was Rex. “Oh crap.” I dropped down to my knees, hiding myself in front of a mannequin.

“Sure, the mannequin gets some action,” C.C. said from behind me.

I turned my face to see the mannequin’s bits and pieces in my face. My cheeks burned as I hopped to my feet. “I was dodging Rex, who thinks I’m home working on science stuff with you guys.”

“Sure, that’s what all the girls say.” He patted my back.

“Don’t make me regret helping you.” My eyes narrowed.

C.C went back into his dressing room, with another pair of jeans and two shirts, while the rest of us waited on him.

“We might have a problem.” Drake grabbed my arm, pointing to Rex, who’d just walked into the store.

“Crap. Quick, we need to hide.” I raced toward the changing rooms and barged into C.C.’s.

He stood there, in his white briefs, tugging a shirt over his head. When his gaze landed on me, he grinned. “I see you’ve changed your mind. I always knew you had a thing for me.”

“Not in this lifetime,” I said, averting my eyes to the floor and away from his junk.

A second later, Trey scrambled in, knocking me into C.C., who wrapped his arms around me to keep me from falling.

“See, even the men can’t ignore my magnetism.” He gave a fake growl.

“Dude, that’s just all kinds of wrong.” Trey snorted. “The other rooms are full, which is the only reason I’m in here.”

“Where are Kevin and Drake?” I said.

“They’re still out there, but hopefully they’ll be able to convince Rex you’re at home with me and C.C.”

Oh. God. I was so dead.
Okay, Drake’s super smart, he’ll know what to say to convince Rex.

“You can let go of me now.” I jerked away from C.C.’s bare chest and bumped into Trey. Nothing like being the center of a nerd sandwich.

C.C. brushed against my thigh, as he reached for his pants.

“Watch it,” I said.

Trey pulled me toward him to give C.C. some room to get dressed. My back pressed against his chest, and I pretended not to notice the warmth that spread through me. Not quite the reaction I expected.

“Hey, you two came in of your own free will,” C.C. said. “In fact, I should be charging you an admission fee to look at this great bod.”

“Yeah, and I’m regretting every second of this,” I said in a loud whisper.

A knock sounded from outside. “The coast is clear,” Drake said.

Trey and I practically ripped the door off to get out. When the attendant saw the three of us emerge together, she glared.

Great, she probably thought we did something gross in there. Not even close lady.

Once they paid for their clothes and I made sure Rex was nowhere to be seen, we went to find cologne. “Okay, now remember, girls love a guy who smells good. So keep that in mind when you’re picking something out. When you find one you think is right, bring it over here and I’ll let you know whether it works or not.”

They wandered the aisles grabbing the tester bottles and sniffing. I was sure the salespeople loved the cloud of manliness that permeated in the air. A few minutes later, Kevin and Drake came over both holding bottles for me to whiff.

“These are great. See you got it right on the first try.”

“Yeah, tell that to my wallet.” Kevin glanced at the price tag. His eyes bulged, but he pulled out the cash.

“Hey, you’ve gotta make sacrifices if you want this bad enough.”

The two of them went toward the registers to make their purchases, while I waited for the others to finish up.

C.C. sauntered over next. “Here, smell my chest. I already sprayed it on me.”

I leaned closer, inhaled, and erupted into a fit of coughs. “No. That’s too strong. And it reminds me of my dad, who I’d like to point out wears black socks with his flip-flops. Think young and sexy, not old man with a walker. And remember, if I can smell you from ten feet away, then you’ve put too much on.”

“But I like it,” C.C. said.

“You smell like you dove into a vat of old-folks home stench.”

He scowled. “I’ll have you know, lots of women find this scent attractive. Haven’t you seen the commercials?”

“Haven’t you heard of false advertising?” With a sigh, I rubbed my temples. He was not making this easy. He disappeared, taking his eye-water inducing scent with him. A moment later, Trey headed in my direction.

“Okay, I think I’ve found the perfect one.” Trey bent down, so my face was in the crook of his neck.

Dang. He smelled good. My heart raced and for a second I wanted to just gobble him up.
Whoa. What the hell’s wrong with me today?

I cleared my throat and took a step back. “Love it.”

He smiled. “I think I’m getting the hang of this makeover stuff.”

He sure was.

I glanced up to see Drake rushing toward me, Kevin on his heels. “Your boyfriend just came in.”

“Please tell me you’re lying?”

“Nope.”

My gaze flicked over the store. There were no changing rooms in here.

“I have an idea,” Kevin said. “But I don’t think you’re gonna like it.”

“Try me.”

“You can change into one of my new outfits and put on my hat.”

He was right. I didn’t like the idea. But at this point, I had to get the heck out of here without being recognized. “Okay, but where am I supposed to change?”

“There’s a bathroom near the front of the store.” Drake grabbed my arm.

These guys so owed me. Dodging between aisles of cologne and perfume, we hurried to the women’s bathroom. Kevin shoved one of his shopping bags into my hand, then took his beanie off and gave that to me too. When I got into the stall, I stripped out of my clothes and threw on a pair of guys’ jeans and a polo shirt. Next, I tugged on Kevin’s beanie and shoved my hair up inside it. Great, now I was disguising myself as a dude in order to avoid my boyfriend. This was wrong on so many levels.

At last, I trudged from the bathroom to find Trey, Drake, and Kevin waiting for me.

“Wow, I barely recognize you,” Trey said. “Maybe we should get you some cologne, too.”

“Do you want me to punch you in the face?” My eyes narrowed.

He chuckled. “Not really.”

“Then shut your pie-hole.”

We found C.C. a few minutes later, still spraying himself with various scents. If he was in a comic book, there’d be a cloud of fumes drawn above his head. When he saw us approach, he did a double take.

“So, you’re a cross-dresser now? Have to say, I always knew there was something off about you.”

“Not another word, or that bottle is gonna get shoved up your nose,” I said.

He grinned, but went back to work. Three tries later, C.C. found a cologne that didn’t make us gag, which meant we could finally head over for him to get his haircut.

He sat in the black leather chair, an apron type sheet pinned across his shoulders, chest, and back. “I don’t know if I’m ready for this.” He shot me a worried glance. “I haven’t cut my hair in a couple years.”

“You’ll be fine. Besides, how bad do you want to land Liza?” My hand shoved beneath the beanie so I could scratch my head.

“What’s that got to do with my hair?”

“Have you actually looked at your poodle curls recently?”

Before he could argue further, the hairdresser snipped his first orangey-red strand. It fell to the floor, reminding me of a giant Fruit Loop. The stylist moved quickly, and soon there was a giant pile at the foot of his chair. At this short-length, his hair was less orange and more brownish-red. Even I had to admit, he looked like a different guy. Not quite sexy, but a step up from circus clown. Without the fro being the main focal point, I actually noticed how pretty his blue eyes were. We could work with this.

“Do you think I can keep some of this?” he asked the hairdresser as he pointed to the floor.

“What’re you gonna do with it? Glue it to your chest?” Trey laughed.

“No. But my mom will probably like to have a memento.”

“Please don’t tell me you have mommy issues on top of everything else?” I said.

“What? She just keeps things for when I grow up. You know, to show my kids.”

Geez, I’d hate to see what else she had. His first teeth. His first diaper. Maybe toilet paper from his first butt-wipe? So didn’t need to picture any of that.

When we finished with the hair department, the guys decided to head over to the snack bar, leaving me alone to stare in the storefront window where my future prom dress hung in all its glory. Although, I suppose it seemed kind of weird, since I was still dressed like a guy.

“Don’t worry. Only a few more sessions of this and you’ll be mine.” And after today’s foray at the mall, I deserved this dress—or rather earned it. With a smile, I walked across the corridor where I saw a cute retro T-shirt hanging in the window. It made me think of Trey. The faded gray material had his favorite band logo on it. Cool, yet nerdy at the same time. Without a second thought, I went in and bought it. I’d give it to him when the rest of the guys weren’t around. A kind of gift to celebrate the new him. Except, why exactly was I celebrating the new him? I had a boyfriend. A very hot boyfriend. Who I lied to in order to help the Nerd Herd.
But Trey’s a friend. It’s not an issue.
Or at least I hoped it wasn’t.

Chapter 7

After we got back to our house, Drake rushed inside to get changed for his date with Chloe. I sent the Nerd Herd down to the family room so I could put my stuff away, strip out of my boy clothes, and grab some notebooks for them.

When I got downstairs, they were sprawled out in front of the television watching some sci-fi flick, which although it looked awesome, would be a huge distraction.

“TV off,” I said.

They spun to face me, eyes wide, like I’d just told them to down a gallon of gasoline.

“Um—hello, this is Space Radicals III.” C.C. waved at the screen.

“I know. And this is called your first lesson for The Romeo Club.” I tossed him a notebook then handed the other two theirs. With a sigh, I grabbed the TV remote and switched off the movie.

Trey grinned as he stared at the front covers of the notebooks, which had TRC in big letters, with looping hearts below. “Isn’t this kind of girly?”

I glared. “These notebooks are gonna be your lifelines. I put start up conversations in them for you, not to mention, I wrote down different events which are coming up at school. You know, things you can invite girls to. And I also wrote our schedules in them, great date movies, along with date appropriate outfit ideas.”

C.C. flipped through his. “Track meet? Really? Who wants to take a date to a track meet?”

“Hey, I’m just listing school events that some girls hang out at. If you didn’t want my help then you shouldn’t have asked. Besides, the only person in this room who’s ever been on a date is me.”

“She’s got a point,” Kevin said.

I grabbed three pens from the coffee table drawer and handed them out. The guys groaned, but moved to sit on the overstuffed couch and chairs.

“The first thing I’m gonna teach you is how to approach girls and talk to them. You can’t just throw yourself at them.” My gaze flickered to C.C.

“Why did you look at me when you said that?”

Trey snickered. “Dude, you seriously have to ask?”

My lips twitched. “Here’s the thing. You need to start small. You know, offer them a piece of gum in class. See if they’re reading a book and get them to talk about it. Comment on a new hairstyle. Something that lets them know you’ve taken notice of what they’re doing or interested in.” I twirled a piece of hair around my finger. “Heck, if you don’t know what to say, you can even ask if they have notes for class you can borrow. That’ll lead to at least two potential conversations.”

The boys stared at me, waiting for me to continue.

“Guys, this is the part you should be writing down.”

They opened their notebooks and jotted down a few things. But I wondered how much they’d actually take away from this or if it was a waste of time.

“So I’m gonna pretend to be the girl you like. Each of you will have the chance to approach me and start a conversation,” I said.

Trey’s cheeks reddened. “We have to do this in front of each other?”

“Yes. More than likely you’re not going to be alone the first time the two of you talk. So it’ll be good practice to have others around. Kevin, why don’t you go first?”

He set his notebook down, wiped his hands on his jeans and moved across from me.

“Pretend I’m working at the ice cream shop and we’re in between customers,” I said.

He stared at the floor, scuffing his shoe on the carpet. He slid his hands into his pockets. “Hey, Me-Melanie. I, um, I like your hair. Di-did you color it?” His voice cracked.

“Kevin. Look at me.” I tapped his arm. “Don’t be nervous. You have to own the conversation. And try to maintain some kind of eye contact. You’re not having a conversation with the carpet.”

He nodded, cleared his throat, then glanced at me. “Hey, Mel. Like the new hairdo.”

I clapped my hands. “Yay. See? You got this. Just go with it. More than likely she’ll make a comment about just getting it done, or thank you. But you’re starting off with a compliment, which will let her know you noticed the change.”

He smiled then took his spot in the recliner, where he wrote a few notes down.

“Okay, C.C. you’re next.”

He sauntered across the room, while I acted like I was opening my locker. He leaned against the wall, waggled his eyebrows up and down then said, “Liza, your bra-strap is showing.”

My gaze drifted to my shoulder, where one of my light blue straps was visible. I fixed my shirt then rolled my eyes. “Are you trying to get slapped? Seriously, don’t go up to a girl and talk about her bra. You sound like a creeper.”