Authors: Karen Aldous
‘I hope you don’t mind a roast vegetable and herb risotto?’ he asked.
Now swaying in utter pleasure, Lizzie smiled. ‘Not at all. Sounds perfect. How is the work progressing at the house?’
Cal continued with the massage. ‘Going brilliantly. I couldn’t believe how much they’d cleared outside. Looks better already. The diggers were in. Inside, the walls are reorganised and plastered so the main reception room now joins the kitchen and the dining room. New windows and doors are in. Most of the new wiring and plumbing. So, yes. It’s going well.’
‘You managed to do all that from Nantucket?’
‘Yep, with Jean-Luc’s help of course. He has three teams working down there. He must have a lot of respect in the area. Each had drawings and materials. I was impressed.’
‘Wow, I can’t wait to see it. I don’t personally know how he does it. I just know he gets things done and quick. He’s not afraid to get his own hands dirty either. I’ve seen him muck in when he has to.’
‘Best I’ve ever worked with. Annatia will be starting next week on the interior.’
‘So the work could be finished for this summer?’
‘I know. Amazing isn’t it?’ Cal took his hands from her neck and slid them through her hair. He bent over and gave her a peck on the lips.
‘It is as they only started about six or seven weeks ago,’ she said.
‘Yes. Great progress. Anyway, I need to get this risotto underway.’
‘Oh, that massage was sending me. My head feels so much lighter. Thank you.’
Jack and Marie-Claire had both disappeared to get ready to go out. As she chatted to Thierry and watched Cal from her chair, Lizzie wondered why she had beaten herself up so much about Cal. Here he was doing everything she could possibly wish for, and she loved him so much. This was love and family. This was completeness and happiness. Why would she want to destroy it?
As soon as Thierry had finished his dinner and said goodnight to Marie-Claire and Jack, Lizzie took him to have his bath. It was lovely to spend some time with him. He’d acquired some new shark friends, Lizzie noticed, who he was babbling away to. His imagination was amazing. Not to mention his knowledge.
‘This is a hammerhead, Mummy, and this one is a tiger shark – bish! They’re fighting.’ He looked up.
‘Oh, you don’t want them fighting.’
‘Here comes the bull shark and the white shark, bish, bish. They told them off, Mummy.’
‘Who has been teaching you all about sharks?’
‘Jack bought them for me in the red shop. He bought the blue shark and the nurse shark too. Look, Mummy,’ he said fishing more from the bottom of the bath. Lizzie had no idea which was which. Like his dinosaurs, she had to confess, Thierry knew them and pronounced them all far better than she could.
Cal came into the bedroom and gave Thierry a kiss just as he had finished putting his pyjamas on. Halfway through reading his Gruffalo book, Thierry’s eyes steadily drooped. Lizzie continued to the end and gave him one last kiss before closing his door.
Cal was pouring Prosecco into flutes as Lizzie lit candles on the freshly laid table. Suddenly the apartment door burst open. Jack and Marie-Claire rushed in.
Jack sprinted resolutely towards his room. ‘I’m just getting my phone. We’re going back to sit by the Palais des Festivals, try and get some shots. There are a lot of stars down there.’ Seconds later he rushed back searching his phone. ‘I also want to show Marie-Claire the images I got last year on my phone from the filming of
Peter and John
. They filmed it on Nantucket and quite a few of us from my school got involved and I got some shots of the stars.’
‘Sounds exciting. Phones are so handy when you get opportune moments like that,’ Lizzie said, taking a sip of her drink and watching Cal as he sat down at the table with an approving nod.
‘Yes,’ agreed Jack. ‘I’d got quite used not to having it but Mom finally gave it back to me when she came to stay at the beach house. Anyway, we’ll see you later.’
The door slammed as they ran out and Lizzie glared at Cal, gripping her chest as she tried to catch her breath. ‘Kelly stayed at the beach house?’
Eyes wide, he leaned his elbows onto the table, pinched his nose and swallowed. ‘Don’t even go there, Lizzie. One night. Harry, Bea, Kelly, they
all
stayed that night. In the other room. We’d all had a lot of stress. Me too, especially as Jack had disappeared a couple of days before. I suggested we have a relaxing day at the beach, and Kelly and I had a few glasses of wine so she couldn’t drive. It just made sense they stay.’
Lizzie’s chest lifted. ‘You never told me she stayed. Oh, but why would you if you’re up to something? Oh, God. Was it the only time? You shit. I knew she would claw herself into you somehow. Of course you wouldn’t tell me you slept with her. It was inevitable.’
‘Don’t be ridiculous.’ Cal rose from his chair and marched behind her, blocking her as she turned. ‘Stop. You’re overreacting. Grossly overreacting. I don’t even like her.’
She pushed past him trembling, her throat constricting tighter by the second. ‘Cal, I’m such a fool.’ She tried to fight the tears. ‘Why? How could you when you tell me you love me? It stands to reason you still feel for one another. It would have been civil just to tell me you were still in love with her before you came back. In fact I don’t know why you came back.’
Cal, pulled her round and grabbed her hands. ‘Lizzie, will you listen?’
She whisked her hands away and trampled up and down the marble floor, still trying to fight away her pressing tears. ‘Oh, God. I should have been smarter. You two were once lovers and thrown together again, it was bound to happen. She didn’t like it because you had someone new. I wouldn’t be surprised if she designed the separation knowing you would be there. I suspect you felt sorry for her and needed to help her through her drama. Poor Kelly, all heartbroken because Reuben had left her. Did you pity her like she demanded? Did she need comfort in your arms?’
‘Lizzie,’ Cal said following her. ‘For God’s sake. Nothing, not even a hug or a kiss or any other comfort for that matter. I’ve told you. I don’t even like her. I kept her away from us all that time in fact. Will you listen, you’re acting like a child.’
She spun on her heel. ‘Oh, I’m a fucking child now am I? Hah! Cal, don’t even bother trying to convince me nothing happened. Just…just… Would you pack up and go? You can ring Jack and let him know you’re going but he is welcome to stay. You go though. No, on second thoughts, Jack should go. Thierry will be better coming to terms with the loss once rather than twice. God, Cal, I knew this would happen. The one thing. The one person…’ Her tears took control and she dashed for a chair, curling herself up and burrowing her head. How right she had been, and to think she had now subjected Thierry to all the hurt and pain she could so have avoided. She should have listened to her instincts. Nipped it in the bud and stayed single. Why, oh why?
Cal squatted on the sofa, his head in his hands. ‘Lizzie, this is crazy, in your head. It’s all in your head.’
‘Don’t spin it around to make me feel bad,’ she snarled, pacing across to the kitchen and collecting a handful of tissues. ‘
She
stayed at the beach house. This woman, your ex-girlfriend who had broken your heart, left her husband, sought your comfort, mothered you, and, probably while I wasn’t there as well, and then got her way, she slept with you. You couldn’t resist. I’m right aren’t I?’
He shook his head. ‘Not at all. There’s not one statement of fact in your argument. I’m done.’
‘There. You don’t even want to convince me. I knew it. Cal, I know I’m right. I put so much trust in you. You’d better go.’
‘You won’t let me convince you. You’re being completely irrational. Well, I’ve had a truckload to deal with too, and Lizzie, I can’t cope with you being a drama queen too. I really thought you were mature enough to deal with me helping Jack and being away. I can’t say anything to satisfy you. It’s best I go. Maybe you’ll calm down.’
Cal stood before her. She could see her own reflection in his steely eyes as they bored into her. ‘Seems you like drama queens doesn’t it?’ He stared at her, holding his hands on his hips. More than anything she wanted to hold him, she loved him, but the trust she had was shattered. Of course he was guilty and he was going to walk out of her life.
‘Seems I attract them. I’ll be out as soon as I’ve packed. I don’t need this.’ He scampered off to the bedroom. ‘Oh, and you’d better get me Jack’s stuff.’
Her lips quivered. He was going to go. She could no longer hold back further tears. Again, her throat tightened. Did he really think her a drama queen? The exact label she had tried to avoid for herself. Wasn’t it more self-preservation? But, then, did it matter if he’d wronged her? She grabbed another tissue and gathered herself before tiptoeing into the boys’ room. Thierry flinched momentarily but settled. She began collecting up anything belonging to Jack, stashing them into his large holdall. It felt so disrespectful, and sad. Thierry would be devastated when he discovered no Jack in the morning. That was not something she was proud of; hurting her son.
Wheeling the holdall out, she was back by the door before Cal. Perhaps he’d folded everything, she wondered guiltily, thinking about the clothes she’d just stuffed into Jack’s bag. She heard Cal zip up his bag from the bedroom and had to escape. She made a dash for the cloakroom, slamming the door behind her but it bounced as she unleashed the mass of tears she’d hoarded. With blurred vision she caught the door and pushed it again, thrusting her whole body at it whilst catching her head in her hands. Her legs buckled and she slid down the door sobbing, landing in a heap on the floor. Hearing him wheel the bags to the door and then his footsteps trailing away. Maybe he’d forgotten something, her head pounded.
‘Fuck you, bastard. I bet that wasn’t the only time,’ she moaned as she wept. How had she been so naïve? Such a bloody fool. She’d trusted him so easily. The sobs kept coming and she could barely breathe. Those weeks of pent-up grief she had spent, weeks of not saying anything. Oh, God, was this what hyperventilating was? Her chest ached trying to catch her breath.
Bastard, bastard
. Her heart screamed and hurt so much. Her poor son. And, the anger, she was so mad at herself too for letting Kelly get to her. She should have finished it weeks ago whilst she still had her dignity and Kelly couldn’t humiliate her. Or Cal for that matter. She guessed it was Kelly instigating it. She pulled off a handful of toilet tissue and blew her nose. She could hear a banging outside the door.
‘I’ve grabbed what I can see. Anything of either Jack’s or mine, text me. I’ll collect it from Marie-Claire while you’re at work. I’m off.’
The apartment door shut with an echoing finality. She sniffed. ‘Have a great life with Kelly.’ No doubt she’ll be moving in. No wonder Jack felt he needed to get away from her. Free from her snare. Cal was a fool. She had messed up his life once, why would he allow her to do it again? Lizzie grabbed her skull, pulling her hair and dragging down her head. The crying wouldn’t stop.
Where are all these tears coming from? My God, my heart is totally wrecked. I should’ve followed my instincts.
She blew her nose again.
‘Thierry. I’d better check he hasn’t woken up. Shit,’ she said to herself as she opened the cloakroom door. Then she dashed back inside to the mirror and turned on the light above. She pulled off some more tissue and cleaned up the trail of make-up streaked around her eyes and down her face. ‘Oh, Jeez.’ She switched off the light and crept round to his bedroom. Gently turning the knob, she peeked in. Seeing him safely snuggled up, her heart immediately wrenched. She pushed the door further, tiptoeing in and sitting beside him, she began stroking his face. His eyes were firmly closed. Her fingers ran gently over the smooth flawless skin.
‘You and me, T. You’ll keep me sane,’ she whispered. ‘I should have known better. I’m so sorry.’ Containing tears for a few moments more, she then hurried out for fear of waking him. Fleeing back to her room, the anguish erupted again. She crashed on the bed wondering how this would all affect her son. Poor Thierry. He had become so attached to them both, Cal and Jack. She could never let herself get involved again. Never. Never. And, she shuddered again with self-pity, all her dreams; shattered in an instant! Trust evaporated as fast as acetone.
Still in shock from Lizzie’s mammoth misjudgement, Cal hauled both his and Jack’s bags as fast as his muscles could manage. His first thought was to drive out to Domaine Margot, but it then occurred to him that the services may not even be switched on and he wasn’t going to begin messing about in the dark. His mind was now a complete fog and, he had to admit, Lizzie’s accusations had completely blown him away. How on earth had she created such a monster? She had completely lost the plot and he barely recognised her. Even throughout the crisis she went through with Anton and her mother, she hadn’t been this irrational.
He jostled along the street and saw the sign ‘Hotel’. This will do. Nothing grand, but just close enough so that Jack could find him. He entered the doors and waited at the desk until a young woman appeared. He asked for two rooms adjoining. As much as he owed Jack an explanation, he was too jarred to stay up talking. He needed to be alone. At least for tonight. He was sure Jack would be OK. He’d called him on his mobile and briefly explained. Jack sounded concerned and told him he would be along in about half an hour.
Cal opened Jack’s bags. Lizzie had just thrown everything in,
damn her!
He hurled the contents onto the bed and, one by one, folded each item to at least some acceptable standard and placed the toiletries in Jack’s toiletry bag. It then occurred to him, Jack may have another bag. He would need to check with him and collect it tomorrow. Right now, he needed rest. He slid the repacked bag to the floor and eased himself onto the bed before letting his head fall into the pillow. The room wasn’t exactly his idea of restful, rather tatty and tired, in fact, but it offered peace. Somewhere to think. The weeks of unrelenting stress had bruised him enough and he just needed some quiet to lick his wounds.