Authors: Tawdra Kandle
“I guess.”
They stood for a moment,
both remembering. Gradually, Jude became aware that Cooper was
still holding her hand. When she tried to gently tug it loose, he
gripped it tighter.
“Jude,” he whispered,
pulling her closer.
She swallowed hard and
licked her lips. Her heart was pounding, but not in the same way it
did when Logan had danced with her. Before she could say anything
or step back, Cooper’s arm gripped around her back, and he lowered
his mouth to cover hers.
At first, all Jude could
think was,
Cooper’s kissing me!
Panic coursed through her
veins, but she wasn’t certain if it was because Cooper’s lips were
over hers...or if it were simply because his lips were not
Daniel’s.
She managed a single
coherent thought—
well, why NOT Cooper?—
before his mouth
opened, and she felt his tongue against her closed lips. She made
the decision and opened to his persuasion.
It only took a moment for
Jude to realize that her heart had slowed to its normal rate. She
became aware of Cooper’s fingers against her back, but only because
he was pressing against her bra strap, and the hooks were digging
into her spine. She mused that Cooper was a decent kisser, which
wasn’t surprising, but what did it say that she was only enjoying
it, not being swept away?
She took advantage of him
pulling away slightly for a breath and spoke against his mouth.
“Cooper--”
He would have gone back for
seconds, but Jude ducked her head. “No—Cooper. Listen. Wait.”
He stepped back, still
holding her. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong, but
Cooper—you kissed me.”
He rubbed his jaw, but his
eyes didn’t leave Jude’s face. “I’m aware of that. I was standing
right here.”
“But Cooper.
Me
. You
kissed
me
. What are you thinking?”
He dropped her hand and
turned away a little. “I don’t know. I guess I was thinking that I
wanted to kiss you, so I did. I mean, Jude, you know, I always
liked you. We get along. We’re both, um...you know, not with anyone
right now. So why not?”
Jude choked back all the why
nots that flooded her mind and chose the least hurtful explanation.
“I’m not ready, Cooper. We were just standing here talking about
Daniel.”
“I know that. But Jude,
Daniel is gone. I’m sorry. I know that sounds harsh. I miss him
every day. I was sanding that table, thinking of the day we were
planning it. I still keep expecting him to walk into the shop and
tell me about some new job he and Logan are setting up. I
drive past a property that comes up for sale, I still reach for my
phone to call him.
“But he’s not here. And if
you and I both miss him, what if we missed him together?”
Jude closed her eyes,
feeling the weight of the day closing in on her. “Cooper, when you
kissed me, how was it? How did it feel?”
He raised one eyebrow. “Are
you fishing, Jude? You’re a great kisser. I’ve always thought you
were attractive.”
“But did you feel anything?
Like...sparks? You know?”
Cooper looked around the
room, up at the ceiling, anywhere but Jude’s eyes. Finally, he
shook his head.
“Not sparks. But that could
come. And my God, Jude, we’re not kids. Maybe that’s the kind of
thing you only get when you’re young.”
“That’s the most depressing
thing I’ve ever heard. So now we’re old and washed up?”
“No! Or—I don’t know.
Dammit, Jude, I’m trying to do a good thing here. You and me
together makes sense, right?”
Jude took his hand again,
squeezing it between both of hers. “Of course it makes sense,
sweetie. I love you, and I will always love you. But you’re my
friend. We can remember Daniel, and miss him together, without
this.” She pointed to his lips and then to her own. “And Cooper,
I’m greedy. If I were ever to want...more someday, again, I want it
all. I don’t want to settle. I want sparks. I want--” She closed
her eyes and smiled. “I want the magic, like when you’re dancing
with someone and you look up at him...and the world stands still.”
She shivered, as remembering, the feeling washed over her
again.
Cooper heaved a sigh.
“So...nothing? You felt nothing?”
Jude bit her lip and glanced
up at him through her eyelashes. She shook her head.
Cooper pressed his lips
together and nodded slowly. And then one side of his mouth quirked
up.
“Daniel would die laughing
at us right now.” He chuckled, and Jude couldn’t help joining
him.
Before long, they were both
crying with laughter, clutching their sides and leaning against the
walls.
“I
kissed
you!
Because I thought Daniel would want me to! God, what the hell was I
thinking?” Cooper doubled over again.
“Spark! No spark!” Jude
gasped, holding her middle.
Finally, when the laughter
had subsided to wheezes, Jude patted Cooper’s shoulder.
“I don’t know what’s got
into you guys. First Matt takes me to dinner, and unless I’m
imagining it, he almost put the moves on me. You here, tonight. And
Logan--” She stopped and looked down.
“What about Logan?” Jude
heard the curiosity in his tone.
She waved her hand. “Oh,
nothing. You know Logan, he’s just coming around a lot, keeping his
eye on me. And then the other night...” She bit her lip. The dance
and near-kiss was not something she was ready to share. For some
reason, it felt more sacred than what had just happened with
Cooper. She shook her head.
“The other night?” Cooper
prompted.
“I’m being silly. I was
going to say that if I didn’t know better, I’d expect Eric to come
by next, offer to bring me on as Janet’s sister-wife.” She winked
at Cooper. “That might not be a bad gig.”
Cooper rolled his eyes, and
Jude laughed again.
“Okay, I got to get home.”
She smiled up at him. “Thanks for this. I needed it.”
Cooper lifted a hand. “I’m
glad I could help. Even if there’s no spark, at least I can provide
comic relief.”
“Which is exactly what I
wanted tonight. I’ll talk to you next week, Cooper.” She turned,
but before she reached the door, she stopped and looked back him,
still standing by the unfinished table.
“Cooper, that spark? Don’t
give up on it. Not yet. You’re going to find someone who can give
it to you.”
***
Ever since high school graduation, the
posse had made sure to get together at least once a month. At first
it hadn’t been difficult; even when Daniel and Logan went away to
college, they were less than an hour away and regularly back in the
Cove. The girlfriends, and then the wives, were included in most of
their plans, but the ones who stuck, like Jude, Samantha and Janet,
were wise enough to give the boys their time alone, too.
When Logan designed his
house, he had included a room that was especially for the posse.
From the solid oak bar in the corner, with its built-in coolers and
ice-maker, to the pool table and state-of-the-art sound system, it
was a man’s room. Over the years, he had added framed photos of the
group and other mementos. It was, he thought, their unofficial
clubhouse.
He sat on his leather
barstool and watched as Matt chalked a cue. Eric and Cooper were
playing, too, but it was one of their more laid-back games. No high
stakes here tonight. It was a Friday night, and after a few beers,
they were all feeling pretty mellow.
“So, Matt.” Mark tossed a
handful of nuts into his mouth and munched. “Remember when we
talked about you guys dating my sister? What happened? How did you
end up with her friend instead?”
They all knew the answer,
but it was much more fun to rib Matt about it than to admit that.
He ignored Mark for a few minutes as he lined up his shot and
pocketed a few balls.
He straightened before
leaning his cue against the table and picking up his beer. “I have
no freaking clue. All I can tell you is I took Jude out to dinner
one night. I didn’t put the moves to her, because...well, hell.
Because she’s
Jude
. I thought I’d lay the groundwork, you
know? Wine and dine her before I--”
Mark yelled, clapping his
hands over his ears. “My sister! She’s my sister. Keep it PG-13,
please.” He shuddered.
Matt shrugged. “You asked.
Anyway, before I could ask her out again, she had that thing at
that Tide, and then on the way—you know what happened. I met
Sandra.”
“But you weren’t supposed to
be picking up other girls. You were supposed to be courting my
sister.” Mark had moved on to pretzels, and he jabbed one in Matt’s
direction to make his point.
Matt grimaced and cracked
his knuckles. “I don’t know what to tell you, man. I love Jude.
Like I love my sisters, you know? I tried to look at her different
when we were at dinner that night, but I just kept thinking of her
like Molly or Ellen. And then she brought up kids, and I started
thinking. You know what? I want kids. I want to be a dad.”
Logan sipped his bottle. “Is
Sandra on board with that?”
“We haven’t gone far down
that road, but yeah, I’ve been honest. She has Lily, and she’s a
great kid. But Sandra says she never planned to have an only
child.” He picked up his cue again and ran his fingers down the
shaft. “It’s early days yet. I’m not jumping into anything, not
without being as sure as I can be. But we’re a good fit so far.” He
looked up and met Logan’s eyes. “You guys like her, right?”
Logan smiled. “She’s
terrific. Fits in real well. I’m glad it worked out for you,
buddy.”
“So then there were two.”
Eric blew an easy shot and cursed without any heat. “Cooper and
Logan. You want to give us a status report, too? Nosy minds want to
know.” He waggled his eyebrows at Cooper, and Mark groaned.
Cooper looked uncomfortable
as he stepped around the table and eyed up his shot. He leaned
over, squinting, and the room was silent as he flicked the
ball.
Balls scattered, sliding
into pockets with satisfying clicks. Cooper stretched his back and
glanced at Logan.
“What do you want to know?”
He stalked around the car and dug around in the cooler. “Shit,
Logan, I’m done with beer for the night. Mind if I pull out the
good stuff?”
Logan spread his hand in a
help-yourself gesture. Cooper rummaged in the small fridge and
emerged with a bottle of Jack. He pulled a shot glass from the
shelf, filled it and downed it in one smooth move.
“What do you want to know?”
he repeated, looking around. “What I did with Jude? You want the
dirty details? Shut up, Mark.” He glared as his friend opened his
mouth. “We all get it. So plug your ears or take this chance to hit
the head while I give the people what they want.” He poured another
shot and downed it just as fast.
“They want to know how I
seduced Jude.”
Logan’s breath hissed in
between clenched teeth, and his hands balled into fists. “Son of a
bitch, that was never part of the--”
“What, Logan? Part of the
plan? I don’t remember us laying down guidelines. No one gave
me a rulebook. It was just, sweep Jude off her feet and may the
best man win. Remember?” He grinned. “Well, maybe you’re looking at
the best man.”
“You--” Logan jumped to his
feet and would have sailed over the bar if Eric hadn’t grabbed his
arm.
“What?” Cooper repeated.
“Why are you getting so sore? It’s what we agreed on, right?”
“Cooper, I think you need to
shut up for a minute.” Matt’s face was pinched as he approached the
bar.
Logan stepped back, holding
onto his cool with the thinnest of threads. Mark patted his
shoulder and glanced between the two men.
“Want to tell us what’s
going on? Cooper, did something really happen with you and
Jude?”
“Why, don’t you think I’m
good enough for her?” Cooper raised one eyebrow.
“Of course not. None of you
are good enough for my sister. But I’m pretty damn sure if
something did happen, Jude would’ve told my wife, and my wife
would’ve told me. So I’m wondering what you’re playing at
here.”
Cooper held his gaze steady
for a minute more before he sighed and rolled his shoulders.
“Nothing. Nothing happened with Jude and me. Well, I kissed her,”
he amended. “But that’s all, and it didn’t go any further. And it
won’t.”
“Why not?” They had
abandoned all pretense of continuing the game, and Matt leaned
against the table.
Cooper raised one shoulder.
“No spark. That’s what she said, anyway. And she was right. I mean,
kissing her was fun. It was great. But it was, you know...” He
searched for a word. “Comfortable. You know when you’re kissing a
girl, and you get to the point where if you have to stop, you feel
like you’re going to die?”
They all looked around the
room, down at the floor, as they nodded.