The One Year Wisdom for Women Devotional: 365 Devotions through the Proverbs (79 page)

October 27

Mind Your Own Business

     
Like one who seizes a dog by the ears

          
is a passer-by who meddles in a quarrel not his own.

The dictionary definition of
meddle
is “to interfere, to involve oneself in a matter without right or invitation.” Some things are just not our business, are they? It is the passer-by person who certainly has no business in someone else’s business. And so who are the passers-by? They are the people who have not done their homework. They just come, look at the surface of things, and think they can give a quick opinion, quick fix, or decision without knowing both sides or really all the information.

A passer-by is someone who has no vested interest. Now this is more than just being neutral. They really do not care about the long-term effect.

A passer-by is someone who is there for a moment and then moves on. They are not willing or able to be part of the solution.

And so our proverb wisely advises us today, mind your own business.

But then I feel a burden to say there is one thing that you can do. Pray. There are far too many relationships around us, even among Christians, that are fractured. Pray. If you really do care, if you want to make a difference, pray. Sometimes we need to be more than a passer-by. There is a time to be silent, but then there is a time to get involved and speak the truth in love.

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

Meddling
—maybe you have never used that word before. Are you a mother-in-law? Oh, how tempting it is to give your unsolicited opinion. My mom was the perfect example of wisdom regarding this. In her over forty years of being a mother-in-law, I never once heard her say anything critical about her sons-in-law. She made it clear to her three daughters that she was not our sounding board for marital griping. We needed to work it out. My grandma used to say, “Too many cooks spoil the stew.”

One Year Bible Reading

Jeremiah 51:1-53; Titus 2:1-15; Psalm 99:1-9; Proverbs 26:17

October 28

Not Funny

     
Like a madman who throws firebrands, arrows, and death,

     
Is the man [or woman] who deceives [their] neighbor,

     
And says, “I was only joking!”

H. A. Ironside commented, “Amusement at the expense of another’s suffering, none but a most thoughtless and selfish person will engage in.”

Deceiving your neighbor and then covering it up is the topic of this proverb.

To
deceive
is “to represent as true that which is known to be false.” It is to mislead someone or to trick someone or to betray someone. Do we ever do this?

Wives, do you ever mislead your husband regarding how much money you’ve spent? Or have you ever betrayed a friend by sharing private information she trusted you with? Or have you ever tricked someone into doing something you knew they didn’t want to do? A good way for us to realize how wrong and hurtful this is, is to remember when someone else has done it to us.

So the best lesson we can learn from this proverb is to be honest, to be fair with others. One of the greatest reputations that you can have during your life is that others can and do trust you. How wonderful it is for people to know that they are safe with you. Their reputations are safe, their money is safe, their feelings are safe, their private affairs are safe. Can you say that this is always true with you? If it isn’t, if this has not always been true in the past, today is a new day, and God himself will teach you a new way.

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

Jesus taught us to “love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:39). This gives us a simple guideline for living. Is it easy? Not always. It isn’t always easy to stay calm, or put others first, or to refuse to retaliate when hurt. But when we obey God’s commandment, it’s not only better for others; it’s better for us. Let’s take it further than just refraining from bad behavior; let’s learn to be genuinely interested in people. This frame of mind stretches us past our own little worlds and interests. It teaches us that God has a big world, and he also has a big family.

One Year Bible Reading

Jeremiah 51:54–52:34; Titus 3:1-15; Psalm 100:1-5; Proverbs 26:18-19

October 29

Putting Out Fires

     
Without wood a fire goes out;

          
without gossip a quarrel dies down.

There’s a billboard along the road in Indiana that reads, “He who throws dirt . . . loses ground.” Why would someone in Indiana hoist such a sign for all to see? Perhaps he’d seen way too much fighting and feuding. It was his way of saying, “Knock it off.”

Conflict, differences of opinion, even arguments happen. They are just all part of life. Even great men of God like Paul the apostle and his good friend Barnabas once had a sharp disagreement. In some ways differences can be a good thing if we’re committed to building bridges instead of burning them. They can stretch our patience, hone our communication skills, and most important, test our obedience to the Lord’s command in Colossians 3 to forgive and forget. “If anyone has a complaint against another, even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do” (v. 13,
NKJV
).

I heard some great advice from a wise, older man. When you are offended or angry with someone, stop and consider,
How significant will this be in twelve months?
In the heat of the moment, molehills can seem like mountains, but over time, mountains can seem like molehills. And as our proverb tells us today, if there is no fresh wood like gossip thrown in the fire, the fire just goes out.

A four-year-old boy decided he’d try reciting the Lord’s Prayer. He prayed this version: “And forgive us our trash baskets, as we forgive those who trash basket against us.” Actually, if you’re stewing about a conflict or quarrel with someone, that’s a pretty good prayer. Now that I think of it, I think I’ll pray it myself.

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

A quarrel, like a fire, needs fresh wood to keep it going. However, long after the flame has died, there might still be some hot coals lying under the ash. Once the heat of the moment has passed, we may think we are over it. But unless we honestly take the situation to the Lord and let his Spirit douse the lingering embers, they can rise up as flames of anger even years later.

Let’s Pray

O Holy Spirit, please pour over my heart and mind. If there are lingering coals of grudges and resentment lying buried within me, wash them away. Help me to see everyone as someone you love. Change my heart so that I do indeed love them.

One Year Bible Reading

Lamentations 1:1–2:22; Philemon 1:1-25; Psalm 101:1-8; Proverbs 26:20

October 30

Rumors

     
Rumors are dainty morsels

          
that sink deep in one’s heart.

Rumors. If it wasn’t for rumors, there’d be a lot fewer magazines in the grocery store. Our proverb today says that rumors taste good, but they go down deep in us. I really wish this proverb wasn’t true, but it is, and we know it. Think about it. If we listen to a tidbit of gossip, as much as we hate to admit it, it does capture our interest. Part of us may be thinking,
That is a mean thing to say. That’s probably not true
. But somehow that tidbit does stick with us. The next time we see that person, we do have a jaded view of her. And because of that, maybe we don’t trust her like we did, or if she’s been a friend, we distance ourself.

Isn’t this just one more evidence of Satan’s handiwork? I wonder when we will ever become more astute and stop falling for his insidious devices? If there was ever a scheme from the pit of hell, it’s gossip, especially among the family of God.

What would happen, really, if all of us—all of us as women of God—what if we banded together and just boycotted all passing along and all listening to gossip? What if we all wore buttons that said, “Just say no!”? You might be thinking,
That will never happen
. Well, maybe everyone won’t join us, but you know what? That doesn’t stop us from saying, “Okay—for me, I’m done with it.” Just say no, and Satan will have one less pawn in his wicked plan.

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

Be aware: there are some nasty rumors about God floating around out there too. And who is the perpetrator? It is none other than the enemy of our souls, the father of lies, Satan himself. You might not even realize how his lies have gone deep within your own heart. Do you doubt God’s love for you? Do you wonder if he hears your prayers? Do you question if his plans for you are real and good and practical in this day and age?

Let him speak words of truth: “I love you with an everlasting love” (Jeremiah 31:3,
NIV
). “I will never leave you nor forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5,
NKJV
). “[My thoughts toward you] . . . outnumber the grains of sand” (Psalm 139:17-18).

One Year Bible Reading

Lamentations 3:1-66; Hebrews 1:1-14; Psalm 102:1-28; Proverbs 26:21-22