Read The Murder Exchange Online
Authors: Simon Kernick
Tags: #Literature & Fiction, #Action & Adventure, #Mystery; Thriller & Suspense, #Crime, #Mystery, #Thriller & Suspense, #Hard-Boiled, #Thrillers & Suspense, #Suspense, #Thriller, #Crime Fiction, #Thrillers
A Land Cruiser pulled up outside the brothel. It
looked familiar. The time was ten to midnight.
'Are you listening, Max, or are you fucking
ignoring me?' Johnny whined.
Krys Holtz, Big Mick and Fitz stepped out, and
the car did a U-turn and pulled away, driving past
us. It looked like the driver was Slim Robbie, and I
wondered if he'd be coming back.
314
'I'm ignoring you, Johnny/ I told him, watching
as Krys and his men rang the buzzer, and a couple
of seconds later went inside. Johnny hadn't seen
them, which suited me fine. If he'd had half an
inkling that our job was to kidnap Krys Holtz, he
would have been out of the van faster than Wile E.
Coyote and running all the way back to Amanda,
Dolia, even Beatrix and her butt plugs, without
stopping.
'I thought you was a mate of mine/ said Johnny,
sounding put out, but I hardly heard him. My
blood was up, and like a youthful Elvis I was ready
to rock and roll.
The banged three times in quick succession on the
vt.u t> interior panel, then twice slowly, the signal
that they'd arrived. Three more bangs came back to
acknowledge that the message had been received
and understood.
'Sorry, Johnny, but we've got work to do. Start
driving.'
Johnny pulled the Mercedes van away from the
kerb and drove slowly along the road until he was
about fifteen yards past the entrance to Heavenly
Girls.
'All right, stop here/ I told him. 'Double park/
'Can you tell me what's going on now, Max?'
'No.'
I banged on the interior panel twice to let them
know we were in position. The back doors opened
and I saw Tugger Lewis in the wing mirror as he
walked up the steps to the entrance. It was on.
I pressed the stopwatch and watched it as the
seconds ticked by, knowing that this was it, the big
315
one. Just like the old days. All my senses fusing
together into one single core of absolute concentration.
It's life or death, this. Nothing's got
higher stakes. You fuck up, you die. Your life ends,
just like that. Kaput! You're history. But nothing
beats it either. Nothing ever beats the pure
adrenalin rush, the intensity, the sheer joy of battle.
I bet not even one of Amanda's multiple orgasms
comes close.
Thirty seconds. Forty. Johnny said something to
me, but I couldn't hear him. His voice was just
interference, meaningless. Fifty seconds. Time to
go. I banged the interior panel five times in quick
succession, put the stopwatch in my pocket, and
stepped out of the van. I pressed my mouth against
the half-open window. 'Stay here/ I said. 'Do not
move.'
I turned away before he could answer and
walked towards the front entrance of the brothel,
Joe and Kalinski coming up beside me. Joe had a
holdall over his shoulder. No-one spoke. As we
walked, we took black balaclavas from the pockets
of our regulation blue boiler suits, and pulled them
over our heads. The rain was coming down in
sheets and the street was empty. We didn't look
suspicious, we just looked like three normal
kidnappers.
Kalinski pressed the buzzer and the door clicked
open straight away. So Tugger had the reception
area under control. Good. Part one had at least gone
to plan. We stepped into the lift, and Joe put the
holdall on the floor and took two automatic shotguns
with sawn-off barrels out of it, handing one to
316
Kalinski. He then pulled out a dozen spare shells
which he stuck in one of the pockets of his boiler
suit before replacing the holdall on his shoulder. We
didn't want to leave any evidence behind. While he
was doing this, I produced the Clock, gave it a
quick check, and chambered a round. We were
ready.
The lift opened directly into the reception area
and the three of us stepped out, weapons at the
ready. Tugger was standing there in his suit,
balaclava on, in front of a good-looking young
receptionist with strawberry blonde hair. She had
her hands flat down on the desk in front of her.
Tugger was facing her but pointing his gun at two
^roll-built doormen in dickie bows - one white, one
bicick - both of whom had their hands arrow
straight above their heads, their faces suggesting
there was no way they were going to be heroes. I
couldn't blame them. Being a hero can be a very
overrated pastime. And you don't even get paid.
The receptionist's eyes widened when she saw us
come striding in and she looked like she was going
to scream. Tugger put a finger to his lips. 'Now
now, pet, don't go causing a scene. No-one wants to
hurt a pretty little thing like you. Just tell us which
room Krys Holtz is in.'
I saw the white doorman's eyes widen, like he
couldn't believe we'd be messing around with
someone like Krys Holtz. Believe it, my friend.
Believe it.
'He's in the Lovers Suite on the next floor up/ she
stammered, keen to co-operate. 'It's the second
door on your left when you come out of the lift.'
317
What about the other two with him?'
'I don't know which rooms they'll be in, but
they'll be on the same floor. They always stay close
together.'
Tugger pulled her to her feet while Joe and me!
handcuffed the two bouncers under the watchful
eye of Kalinski. When they were secured, and'
Tugger had got hold of the CCTV tape, wi
shepherded the three of them towards the room to
our left. At the same time a potbellied businessmanSB
emerged from it on the arm of a stunning-looking
oriental girl.
'Ohmigod!' whispered the girl. The businessman
simply stood there, looking surprised.
I raised the gun and pushed them back into the3^
room, following them in. Two more men in suits sat -- in the corner with two equally stunning and
scantily clad women, while another girl sat at the j;
bar talking to the lone barman, a baby-faced guy in
his early twenties. All eyes went to the door as our
unusual-looking convoy entered, but no-one was
stupid enough to cry out.
'Ladies and gentlemen,' I said in my best public
speaking voice as we ushered everyone into the far
corner of the room, 'you have nothing to fear. We
are here to collect a debt from an individual within J
the building, and are interested in that man only. If
you do as you're told and co-operate, no-one will
be hurt and we'll be out of your hair within a few
minutes.' I motioned to the barman with my gun.
'You, get over in the corner with the rest of them..
And you.' The girl sitting at the bar scowled at me
but did as she was told, as did the barman.
318
It was exactly three minutes and fifteen seconds
from the moment Tugger had entered the building,
and so far things were running smoothly.
Kalinski was tasked with guarding those in the
bar, so ne stepped forward and stood blankly
watching his charges, shotgun pointed towards
them, while the rest of us exited and headed up to
the next floor, using the stairs behind the reception
area Trigger was leading because he'd gone up that Way the other night. When he got to the next floor,
he slowly opened the door and looked down the
corridor, then turned and gave us the all clear. We
followed him in, and Joe took up position by the
lift where he could make sure no-one interfered
wifti things. Tugger and me crept quietly towards
the c.ocond door on the left.
When we reached the Lovers Suite, Tugger
stopped and listened at the door. The rooms were
meant to be soundproofed but he could obviously
hear something because he motioned for me to
have a listen. I put my ear against the wood and
immediately caught the noise of some serious
humping. The girl was sounding like she was
having the time of her life, which, for the money
Tugger claimed it cost, was no great surprise. Holtz,
meanwhile, was making these horrible grunting
noises, sounding like something out of a wildlife
documentary.
Tugger turned the handle very slowly and gently
eased the door open. When it was six inches ajar the
noise of the shagging was amplified several times
over, and so far neither of them appeared to notice
that they were being interrupted. Tugger used the
319
barrel of his gun to push it open further and,
quietly as possible, we tiptoed inside.
The sight that greeted us was pretty fui
horrible, to say the least. Krys's hairy and surprisl
ingly large arse viewed us like an angry cycl<
from its position on the four-poster bed as
pounded up and down, piston-like, while
shapely legs sprouted out like feelers on either si
It was impossible to see the girl's face as it was"
almost completely enveloped by Krys's furry fonnfSB
A few locks of blonde hair peeped out over one o(t
his shoulders, and that was about it. I wondered i
she could even breathe down there. I looked across
at Tugger and he grinned at me beneath the
balaclava. I grinned back. I was enjoying this.
The room itself was very flash-looking and-3
worthy of such a high-class establishment. A thick M
shagpile carpet obscured the sound of our footsteps;
as Tugger quietly closed the door and we crept up|
to the bed. Not that it was likely we would ha
been heard anyway above the noise being made(
Krys was grunting like a herd of hungry pigs as
pummelled his way down the home straight, onl;
seconds from the finishing line.
'Aiiieeeee!' he wailed in a final flurry of activity^
lifting his head up as he unloaded his milky cargo.
'Ooooofff!'
At that point, two things happened. The girl, her j
face red and sweaty, courtesy no doubt of being
stuck in Krys Holtz's armpit for the previous five|
minutes, saw me standing over her. Her eyes|
widened and she went to scream. At the same time
Tugger smacked Krys hard on the back of the head
320
with the handle of his gun. Krys let out a surprised
gasp and rolled off the girl, moaning faintly.
I stuck the barrel of the Clock against the girl's
head and told her not to cry out. 'We're not
interested in hurting you, so if you keep quiet and
do not say a word, everything will be fine. If you do
cry out or raise the alarm at any point in the next
ten minutes, then we will kill you. Understand?
Nod once for yes.' She nodded frantically. 'Good.
Now turn over, put your face into the pillow and be
absolutely quiet.'
While I was speaking, Tugger whacked Krys
again, just for good measure, before handcuffing
his hands behind his back, encountering little
resistance from the semi-conscious gangster. The
gni JiJ as she was told and I handcuffed her, taking
a long second to admire her beautifully rounded
rear and ponder the question that has vexed so
many observers down the ages: why is the female
form so much more attractive than the male? And
thinking that maybe Johnny's girlfriend Amanda
had got the right idea.
What the fuck's going on?' moaned Krys while
his eyes made a bad job of trying to focus.
'Shut the fuck up!' snapped Tugger, pulling him off the bed by the handcuffs and forcing him to his
knees. He gave him a quick smack round the face
with the barrel of the gun to establish control.
'Now, get to your feet. Now!'
'Fuck off,' snapped Krys. 'You know who you're
rucking dealing with?'
'Course I do, you prick. Now shut it.'
Krys opened his mouth to say something else but
321
I came round the bed, bolstering my gun and
pulling open a roll of adhesive tape. I bit off a piece
and shoved it over his mouth while Tugger held his
head still. Krys's face went red with rage and he
started struggling wildly so I kicked him hard in
the stomach, doubling him over. It was important
to break him quickly so we could get out of the
place with the minimum of fuss.
Tugger pulled him up by his hair and we manhandled
him to the door. When we reached it, I *
fished out the keys to the girl's handcuffs and
chucked them on the bed. No point inconveniencing
her any more than was necessary.
Krys was struggling again, and in his rage he
managed to kick the door, making a little bit too
much noise for my liking. So I grabbed him by his
bollocks and yanked hard. Twice in quick J|
succession. His eyes bulged and I could almost m smell his pain. I put my mouth close to his ear. ip
'Struggle again and I'll have the fucking things off/ M
I hissed. J
He seemed to get the message, and we pulled
him out of the door without further incident. Joe
was still standing at the end of the corridor next
to the stairs, shotgun in hand. He nodded in
acknowledgement as we came towards him. Krys
turned to me as we walked and his eyes narrowed,
the message in them clear. I stared right back,
daring him to try anything.
Then, suddenly, it all went wrong.
A door swung open just behind us and a white
haired geezer of at least sixty came out, saw what
was going on, and shouted, 'Oh dear! What on
322
earth's happening?' in tones that made you think
he half-expected us to turn round and tell him.
However, he decided against waiting around for an
answer and immediately jumped back into the
room, slamming the door behind him. At this point
we were ten feet from the stairs, and fifteen from
the lift.
Krys, sensing the possibility of rescue, tried to
slow up, dragging his heels along the floor, but I
tugged on his nuts again while Tugger pushed the
barrel of his gun hard against his face. It seemed to
do the trick, and this time he didn't resist as we
pushed him right up to the lift entrance. Joe had
already called the lift and he pressed the button to
open the door. At the same time, out of the corner
ui my eye, I saw another door open further down
the corridor. A second later Big Mick's naked upper
half emerged, wielding a handgun that was pointing
in our direction.
There was a deafening roar as Joe pushed us
aside and pulled the trigger on the shotgun. A huge
chunk of skirting and wall disappeared and Mick
leapt back out of sight. We immediately pushed
Krys into the lift, and I kneed him hard in the
groin to minimize any further disruption. He went
down to his knees and I turned and pointed the
Clock back down the hall. Big Mick appeared
again, his body crouched down, and let off a couple
of wild shots. Joe and I held our ground and
returned fire, sending dust and skirting flying in all
directions. Tugger held on to Krys.