The Mask of the Enchantress (30 page)

The first part would be easy. I could go to Mr. Roston and get the money for my passage home. I could tell him that I had set out for the island and been unable to land because of the volcanic eruption. That was all true.

I could go to England and to Mateland Castle. Then the dangerous part would begin.

One part of Emerald letter kept coming into my mind: shall hardly know what you look like. It has been so long.

Surely it was meant to be!

I thought a great deal about the castle. I believed I knew something about Emerald from what Anabel as well as Susannah had told me. She had said it was long since we met; she referred to her poor vision. That letter of hers was like a beckoning finger, like Fate saying: Come on. It is all made easy for you.

Esmond was the only one who would have been so acutely aware of everything about Susannah that he would immediately recognize an imposture. And Esmond was dead.

Well, it had been diverting to dream and to fabricate such a wild adventure in my mind; and God knew I was in need of some divertissement to draw me out of this hideous depression which enveloped me.

I had done nothing so far except allow Roston to believe that I was Susannah, collect her mail and open it. There was nothing very wicked about that.

I must leave it there and start thinking sensibly.

Misery enveloped me. I kept seeing Anabel coming to visit me at Crabtree Cottage, carrying me off with her on that never-to-be-forgotten nightnd most vividly of all, holding my hand as we stood together looking at the castle.

I had no desire to go on living unless unless

I spent a restless night. I kept dozing and dreaming that I had come to the castle.

t is mine now,I said in my dream.

Then I would awake and toss from side to side, my dream still with me.

In the morning the first thing I thought was: Mr. Roston will be looking for Susannah. He will think she was not on the island. He will know by now that she is the owner of the castle and that that was the purport of the letters he gave me. He would be expecting her to call. I had already created a situation. I had forgotten that. Yes, I was deeper in this than I had at first thought.

Instead of filling me with horror, this thought exhilarated me.

Matelands lived dangerously and I was one of them.

Then I knew that I was going to attempt this outrageous adventure. I was going to enter the biggest masquerade I had ever envisaged. I knew it was wrong. I knew that I would be in acute danger. But I was going to do it. I had to do it. It was the only way out of the slough of despond.

The fact was that I didn care what became of me. The Grumbling Giant had, at one stroke, robbed me of everything I cared for.

I was going to do this desperate thing because, for a host of reasons, it would give me an interest in life.

Besides, I wanted the castle. From the moment I saw it I had felt bound to it, and the urge to take it was growing stronger with every hour because it was only that which could make me want to go on living.

As I walked down Hunter Street I was turning over in my mind what I would say to Mr. Roston, and even as I entered the building and started up the stairs, my mind was not entirely made up. I should not have been surprised if I had blurted out the truth about my deception. But when he received me in his office I did no such thing. He began by saying:

iss Mateland, I am glad youe come. I have been expecting you. This is a terrible matter. Of course there was always the possibility of the volcano erupting, but no one thought it likely, or my father would have advised you against going in the first place. It must have been a shock to you. And now this even greater shock. The death of your cousin in England. I can believe it. It quite terrible.f course. Of course. I gather it was a sudden illness. Most unexpected. A dreadful blow for you.He was gently soothing but, I sensed, eager to get on with the real business. suppose you will be returning to England.t what I must do. I haven enough money for my passage.

y dear Miss Mateland, that presents no problem. We have instructions from Carruthers, Gentle. I can advance you as much as you need. We can book your passage. I hear that your aunt is eagerly awaiting your return.

My resolution was weakening. he old Debilwas indeed at my elbow.

I suddenly knew, there in Mr. Roston office, that I was going on with it.

Within three weeks I was sailing to England on the S.S. Victoria. My thoughts went back to that journey I had made with my parents over eleven years before. How different that had been and yet both voyages were dominated by a sense of adventure and excitement. In both instances I was going into a new life.

There was something uncanny about this. I was changing my character. At times I had the strange feeling that I was becoming Susannah. There was a new ruthlessness about me. Was it possible that when someone died that person soul could find refuge in someone else body? There was a theory about that, I believed. Sometimes I felt that Susannah had entered mine.

Mr. Roston had given me a trunk of clothes and documents which she had left in the care of his firm. Before leaving Sydney I had gone through it. I had tried on the dresses and chic hats. They all fitted me. I began to walk like Susannah. I began to talk as she had. The girl I had been would never have dared do what I was doing. It was significant that I had ceased to make excuses for myself.

I was a Mateland; I was Susannah sister; I belonged to the castle. Why should I not take over the role of Susannah? What harm could it do? Susannah was dead. It meant changing my Christian name from Suewellyn to Susannah. They even sounded something alike.

S.M. was imprinted on the trunks. My own initials.

The long sea voyage gave me the time I needed to adjust and to observe the change in myself. People noticed me. I had lost all my diffidence. I had become not only an attractive young woman but one who knew she was.

The fact that there was now no going back added to my confidence. I had to carry on and I was going to. No one should ever know the difference. From now on I was Susannah Mateland, heiress to a castle and a fortune.

This wild adventure had done something for me. It was so preposterous, so fraught with danger, and there was so much to learn that I had no time to brood on my misery. I could even smile to think of Susannah, who had always enjoyed getting the better of me, now gone, leaving me to enjoy what was hers.

There was a certain amount of social life on the ship. The captain took a great deal of notice of me. He knew that I had been going out to visit relations on Vulcan Island and was full of commiseration. But he congratulated me on my fortuitous escape.

f it had happened a week or so later I should have been there,I said. was going out for a last visit before leaving for England.

very happy escape, Miss Mateland.

I looked sadly out to the sea. There were moments when I

thought it was far from happy and I still wished that I had been there with them.

He patted my hand. ou must not grieve, Miss Mateland, but it is a tragedy that the island has been ruined.

He sensed that the subject was painful and did not refer to it again. But he was particularly kind to me and I told him that I was going home to claim my inheritance.

ateland Castle has come to me on the death of my cousin,I said.

h, you have much to go back to. Is this castle known to you, Miss Mateland?

h yes yes It is my home.

He nodded. oul feel better when you get home.

I went on to talk about the castle. I glowed with pride in it. I was almost aware of Susannah within me urging me on, applauding me. And I thought: This is the sort of thing Susannah would do. I am becoming Susannah.

That was the easy part.

It was April when we docked in Southampton. I took the train to Mateland. It was like retracing that long-ago journey when I sat holding Anabel hand tightly, my whole being thrilled by the granting of my three wishes.

I remembered the comfort I had derived from Anabel and the lovely new feeling of security. I was far from feeling that now.

In fact with every passing moment I was growing more and more apprehensive.

Mateland Station. How heartbreakingly familiar! I alighted from the train and a man in a peaked cap came towards me.

hy, Miss Susannah!he cried. elcome home. Theye expecting you. is good to see you. Terrible tragedy, were it not Mr. Esmond going like that?

es,I said. errible terrible.

Tweren long afore he died I saw him. He came back home. He been away. I can see him now getting out of this train, smiling in that quiet way of his. ack again, Joe,he says. ou won catch me staying long away from Mateland.Not like you, Miss Susannah.

o, Joe, not like me.

ell, youe changed a bit.

My heart leaped in sudden fear. h not for the worse, I hope.

o no. Not that, Miss Susannah. Mrs. Tomkin will be glad youe back. She said to me only the other day: t time Miss Susannah was back, Joe. Thatl make a change up at the castle.

emember me to Mrs. Tomkin, Joe.

hat I will, miss. Can wait to get home to tell her. Is the castle sending for you?

wasn sure of the time.

l get the fly to take you down. How that?

I said it was a good idea.

As I was seated in the fly jogging along those lanes I told myself that this was going to be my first test. I had to keep my ears and eyes open all the time. I must not miss the smallest detail. I had to learn all the time. Even that brief encounter had given me the name of the stationmaster and the fact that he had a wife, and that Esmond had a quiet way with him.

It was scarifying, horrifying and at the same time tremendously exhilarating.

Then, suddenly, there it was ahead of me in all its glory. I was filled with emotion as I gazed at those lofty curtain walls and the strong drum towers at the four angles, at the battlemented gatehouse, the gray flinty walls, formidable, impregnable, and the narrow slits of windows.

I felt a great wave of possessive love for the place. Mateland. Mine.

The fly took us through the portcullis into a courtyard. There we stopped and two grooms ran out to help me alight. I was not sure whether I should know them or not. The elder of the two said: iss Susannah

es,I answered. here.

his is good news, Miss Susannah.

hank you,I said.

t seems so long since you went away, miss, and so much has happened since then. This is Thomas, miss, the new stableboy. He been with us a month or more.

ood day, Thomas.

Thomas touched his forelock and murmured something.

ell, Miss Susannah. Il have your baggage taken up to your room. And youl want to go at once to Mrs. Mateland. She been all impatience for you to come.

es,I said. es.

I walked into the castle. I recognized the hall from Anabel and Susannah descriptions as the main hall. I looked up at the magnificent timbered roof, at the stone walls on which some tapestry hung side by side with spears and lances. I knew that high in the wall there was what was called a eep.It was an aperture scarcely visible from below to those who did not know exactly where it was. Behind it would be a little alcove where the ladies of the house used to look down on the revelries in the hall when they were considered too young to join in or the company was too ribald for them. I knew that it was now used to see what visitors had come and if one did not want to receive them one hurried out of reach.

I had a horrible feeling that I was being watched now, and quite suddenly as I stood there in the hall I was terrified. I had walked into this too glibly. I had not thought of where it could lead me. I was a fraud. I was a cheat. I was taking possession of this magnificent place when I had no legal right to.

It was useless now to tell myself that I had a moral right, which I had been doing since I started on this mad adventure.

I had come here to take the castle. It was as though I had been put under a spell. Now I felt that hundreds of eyes watched me, lured me on, mocked me, urged me to come and see what I could do to take the castle.

I was trapped at this first moment. Here I stood in the center of the main hall and I did not know which way to go. Susannah would have gone straight to her room or Emerald. Susannah would have known.

There was a staircase at the end of the hall. I knew that it led up to the picture gallery. I had heard both Anabel and Susannah mention it many times. I started up it and was relieved to see a woman standing on the landing.

She was middle-aged, rather self-righteous-looking, with brown hair pulled tightly back from her forehead and rather penetrating light brown eyes.

iss Susannah,she said. ell, my word, and it about time too.

ello,I said cautiously.

et have a look at you. H. Youe changed. Foreign parts have done you good. Got a bit scraggy though. I suppose it all this upset.

es, I suppose so.

Who is she? I wondered. Some sort of servant, but a privileged one. A horrible thought struck me. She might be one of those nannies who had been with the child from birth. If so, she would soon find me out.

t was shocking Mr. Esmond so sudden, too. You going to Mrs. Mateland or your room first?

think I better see her first.

l go up with you and warn her youe here, shall I?

I nodded with relief. ow are her eyes?I asked.

heye got much worse. It cataract over them both. She can see a little but of course it going to get worse.

am sorry.

She looked at me sharply. ell, you know she was never one to make light of her misfortunes and with Mr. Esmond going

f course,I said.

She had started up the stairs and I gratefully walked beside her.

l warn her youe here before you go bursting in,she said.

We went along the gallery. I felt I knew it well. There were all my ancestors. I would study them in detail at my leisure.

Up the staircase we went. At the top of it the woman paused. She turned and looked at me and my heart felt as though it would burst out of my body.