The Man Who Couldn't Lose (18 page)

He grinned.

‘You don't have to remember what's gone with pontoon. Come on. It'll relax you.'

‘You don't even like cards. Oh. You've found that stupid pack, have you? It's no good. After you've shuffled them, they don't square up.'

‘Depends who shuffles them. Look at them. They're square now.'

He passed them to her. She looked at them carefully. They certainly were. She gave him an old-fashioned look.

‘Is this the same pack?'

‘Yes. I bet you a fiver I win every trick.'

She grinned confidently. He had never been any good at cards. He hadn't the patience and couldn't remember even a simple sequence.

‘You're on.'

She handed him the pack.

They scurried to the table like children and he put the pack down in the middle.

‘Cut for dealer,' he said eagerly.

He cut first and showed a king.

Mary reached out and showed a six.

‘I'm the dealer,' Angel said, with the grin of a Cheshire cat. He picked up the pack and dealt two cards each on the table.

Mary looked at her cards. She had the five of clubs and the eight of spades.

Angel showed the ace of diamonds and the king of spades.

‘Banker's pontoon,' he crowed. ‘Pay five-card tricks only.'

Mary said: ‘Twist.'

It was the ten of spades.

‘Five and eight and ten, that's twenty-three. You're bust.'

He swept up the cards triumphantly and placed them under the pack, and dealt out another two cards each.

Mary showed her cards to be the seven of hearts and then the three of clubs.

‘I'll buy one,' she said. ‘For a pound.'

Angel grinned and gave her a card.

She turned it over. It was a three of diamonds.

‘That's thirteen,' she said. ‘I'll twist.'

It was the ten of hearts.

Angel grinned again.

‘You're bust.'

He swept up the cards and put them back under the pack in his hand.

This went on for an hour, Angel winning every game, Mary getting angrier and angrier.

Eventually Angel teasingly said, ‘These are the cards you said were no good.'

‘Let me have a look at them, then.'

She reached out and took the pack from him.

‘Are these the cards that that awful man Gumme used?'

‘Yes.'

‘Is there something special about them?'

‘Yes.'

She turned them over face side and looked at the order of the cards. It told her nothing.

‘These are the cards that
you
shuffled and wouldn't square up.
You're
one of a particular group of card player that Gumme could never have played with.'

‘Why?'

‘Because when you shuffle, you divide the pack into approximately two, don't you? Then turn them round and filter them back into one pack. Well, his particular scam would have been defeated by that sort of shuffle. He used to watch all his opponents before a game to see if they shuffled in that way; if they did, he wouldn't play against them.'

‘I don't know what you're talking about,' she said, handing him back the pack impatiently.

‘Well, look at the pack. It's all squared up, isn't it?'

‘Yes.'

‘Well, let's take a card. Any card will do. The top card. I take this card, turn it round and put it back in the pack the other way round and you can feel it … only just … projecting out of the pack very slightly … you can feel it as you run your hand long the edge of the pack.'

He handed the pack to her.

She felt the pack and nodded in agreement.

‘How's that happened, then?'

‘Well, he has had the pack deliberately trimmed. The long sides have been guillotined so that the short sides are very slightly different lengths, making the cards the shape of a trapezium, which means if a card is inserted the “wrong” way the dealer can instantly feel the card projecting out of the pack, and it is easy to slide out to deal at will. What a delight for a card sharp! That's the secret. They
look
exactly the same. The cut is so small. It's something you
feel
not
see
.'

‘I think that's rotten,' Mary said. ‘You've cheated me! You couldn't lose.'

Angel smiled.

‘Yes, Mary. Don't you see? That's why Gumme was called “The Man Who Couldn't Lose”.'

IN THE MIDST OF LIFE
CHOKER
THE MAN IN THE PINK SUIT
THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING HONEST
MANTRAP
SALAMANDER
SHAM
THE UMBRELLA MAN