The Man of my Dreams (7 page)

I grabbed my file, kissed her again and ran off to find Moyra and continue my quest for answers.

Chapter 12

Retracing Steps

No one really knew exactly how old Moyra was. She'd been at this hospital for as long as any of us could remember and had to be in her late 50s, if not older. She held her age well, though, and although a lot of us hazarded guesses, none of us were brave enough to actually ask her. Her hair was long and dark and was only now starting to show slight streaks of grey. She had a lovely, friendly face and smiled a lot. On her frame were the biggest boobs I'd ever seen! She wasn’t on the medical staff but worked in patient filing. If there were any major cases or gossip going on in the hospital, you could be sure Moyra knew about it.

I decided to approach her as if I was asking about someone other than myself. If she knew I was snooping into my own case file, she may be a little tight-lipped. If it was gossip about someone else, however, I was sure she'd freely spill the beans.

“Hello love, what brings you here?” she asked in her lovely English accent, peering over top of her glasses. Her big brown eyes sparkled as she smiled at me.

“Hi Moyra, I was wondering if you could help me with an old patient note I found. I came across it this morning and wondered if you remembered anything about it. It was a young girl who'd been sexually abused by her stepfather. He tried to strangle her. She was brought to this hospital about twenty years ago and I wondered if you were here then?”

She wrinkled her brow and pursed her lips searching her thoughts.

“Oh yes,” she replied, “I remember that. She was in a coma for a while. When she woke up she couldn’t remember anything about the attack or anything about the last few years. Very traumatic for the poor wee thing, and to think it was the fault of her own mother to leave her with that awful man! Poor girl had been abused as well, and her mother had no idea until the hospital informed her.”

I shuddered. Had my mother left me to be abused and tortured by some maniac? It sure didn’t sound like the mother I knew and loved.

"Do you remember anything else, Moyra?” I asked, trying not to look too eager. My hands were trembling and I stuck them into my pockets, trying to look as natural as possible.

Moyra seemed a little suspicious now.

“Why do you ask, Petal? Do you know her or something?”

“Just curious after seeing the note, that’s all," I said trying to look convincing. “Thanks for the info, Moyra,” I said with a tight smile as I headed back to the wards.

Okay, so now what do I do? Moyra pretty much confirmed what I'd read, and now I needed to do a little research to confirm if the young victim was actually me . . . but where to start? Births, Deaths and Marriages would show if mum and dad had divorced and whether or not she remarried.

Maybe I could Google my story and see what came up. So many questions swirled round and round in my head. I had to find out and sooner rather than later. I decided to nip into the library during my break and have a quick look at the Internet.

3 p.m. seemed to drag, but finally I was able to get to a computer. I typed in “young girl strangled by stepfather” and was shocked at how many hits I got. Okay, so I'd have to narrow it down. I knew the year was around 1990 and I also typed in the name of the hospital.

This time I found it. I started to read one of the newspaper reports. It said a 13-year-old girl had been almost choked to death by her stepfather and was in a coma, later waking up with no memory of her attacker or the last two years. The assailant had later been found by police dead, literally ripped to pieces in his own car. There were no leads to whomever or whatever had done it and enquiries were still continuing. I looked at a few more, mostly the same. One, however, confirmed what Moyra had said about me ranting on about a Guardian Angel.

My break was up and I had to get back to work. Great, now I was left with even more questions. I would look online later, at home. I wondered what else I could find.

I was walking back to my car totally absorbed with my thoughts when suddenly someone ran up behind me and grabbed me round the shoulders. I got a fright until a familiar voice said, “Hi, I’m back. Did you miss me?”

Hayley was one of our midwives and I found her very easy to get on with. She was always smiling and happy, loved life, and totally enjoyed her job.

She was so excited she jumped up and down on the spot. I had to go back to work and asked her to meet me at home around 9 this evening. Then I could tell her everything. She hugged me again, kissed me on the cheek, and practically skipped off down the street. She always made me smile and I felt a little better as I drove back to the hospital.

Chapter 13

Your Worst Nightmare

The man sat in his car, waiting for her to appear. He'd been watching her from afar for a long time now. Recently she'd gone away for a while and he'd never found out where. He just knew she wasn’t going to work every day as usual. He'd memorised her schedule and knew her shifts well. Now she was back, and he sat patiently waiting for her to get out of her car. He watched and waited, diligent and focused. He was drawn to her as he'd been to the others, but everything had to be perfect before putting his plan into action.

He'd taken his time with each one of them, but they'd all led to disappointment, all crying like pathetic little children for him to let them go. Not one of them could return the love he obviously possessed for them. He'd given them everything and still they did not love him or even appreciate him. For their disloyalty they'd paid the ultimate price—with their lives. Well, if he could not have their unconditional love he didn’t see why any other man should, either.

Yes, he would make the perfect husband and worship the ground she walked on. All he'd expect in return was her total devotion to him in the bedroom. It wasn’t too much for a man to ask from his wife. After all, wasn't it her duty to satisfy his every sexual need? The others had all been prudes and weren't willing to even try to please him.

"Why do they always shy away from me in disgust?" he wondered.

He was a good looking man who had a healthy sexual appetite and needed a woman who understood this. So far he hadn't found “The One.” They cowered and begged him not to hurt them. It wasn’t as if they were virginal and unaccustomed to the touch of a man. He had surveilled their exploits and conquests well before even taking them on their first date.

He knew how a woman should be treated. He would certainly shower his newest love interest with gifts, cook a beautiful meal with expensive wine, and set a romantic scene. Oh, he'd spare no expense and show her what being with him could be like. The others always whinged and moaned about going home without making an effort to reciprocate his feelings. Once in the bedroom they were totally clueless as to how to please their man. Surely this time would be different?

Once his conquests stepped foot into his love room they'd become hysterical and try to escape. He'd have to restrain them and tape their mouths shut to stop the screaming and struggling. He only wanted to teach them how to do it properly. No pain no gain, wasn’t that the motto? Well, he'd certainly shown them the pain but had so far fallen short on the gain.

True, they managed to get him in the mood but a few of them had died during the foreplay, well before he'd even finished his love making. Weak! How was he meant to finish when they went and died on him? He did prefer his woman to be moving and resorted to having sex with their lifeless bodies only out of necessity. Most, however, survived right to the end. Still, they lacked that certain something to leave him feeling fulfilled. Then afterwards they'd become babies, whimpering and pleading to be set free. Well he'd set them free, all right. They could swim with the fishes for all he cared. It was unbelievable how ungrateful they were, especially after learning what it meant to be made love to by a real man.

He hoped this one would live up to his expectations.

He knew she lived alone, as he'd followed her home a few times. It was obvious her boyfriend no longer lived there. She shouldn’t be too hard to woo, and he'd start the courtship very soon. He started to feel himself stir and harden in anticipation. He could hardly wait! Maybe this one could please him the way he longed to be pleased. But he must be patient and make sure everything was as it should be, or his efforts would all be for nothing. Tomorrow she was on the afternoon shift and then off work for a few days. That's when he'd strike. No one would notice if she was away for a few days.

He watched her get out of her car and go into the hospital. God, she was beautiful . . . and soon she would be his.
Tomorrow, until tomorrow my love
. He could hardly contain himself!

Chapter 14

Disturbia

The excitement was mounting. Tonight was the night! The house was spotless and everything was prepared. He checked and double checked that everything was just right. It had to be perfect. She was the one . . . he was certain of it! She'd set him free from this relentless longing inside, this black hole that seemed to grow bigger and bigger with each failure. It needed to be filled and she'd be the one to do it.

Long ago he realised he wasn't like other men. He had needs, needs that far outweighed anything or anyone . . . needs that couldn’t be satiated with just any woman. Only a special woman, strong yet yielding, could satisfy his hunger. His heart raced and butterflies fluttered in his stomach. Finally the day had come when she would be all his— his to do with whatever his heart desired. His heart desired a lot.

He walked into the bedroom, soundproofed with no windows. On the blood stained walls were pictures of his past loves in various stages of death. Some were only seconds gone, whereas others he'd kept until the smell was overpowering and he had to put them away and not play with them anymore. Sad, he did prefer live playmates, but sometimes desperation kicked in and he needed to finish the ritual. If they died too soon he was forced to continue as if they were still breathing.

But this one, she would be different. He knew in his heart she'd make it to the end and succumb to his charms. He had a lot of toys and looked at them all lovingly. They were all he had left until the right woman made it all complete. They were his family now, now that he had killed his whore of a mother and her bastard boyfriend. God, how he'd enjoyed it! They had made his life hell and he repaid the favour and made their deaths hell. He smiled thinking about it. They had been his firsts, but many more followed. All of them, of course, always begged for their pathetic lives. But fair is fair. After all, his parents hadn't listened when he begged not to be raped and beaten up as a child. Why would his victims expect any mercy from him? He'd inflicted unimaginable pain on them and found it such a turn on that it had become an addiction.

The search, he'd searched high and low for the woman to take away his pain. He knew he'd stop looking as soon as he found Mrs. Right. At this point, he was sure his search was now over.

His whole being ached for her, he was hard and eager to get started but knew he had to wait.
Be patient just a little while longer
. His hand slid into his pants, touching himself lovingly. He closed his eyes and slowly caressed himself. He wanted her now. It was so frustrating! Maybe he could just this once relieve himself beforehand. It felt so good and it was so hard. It was such a shame to waste it.
But no! It was too soon.
He opened his eyes and took his hand out of his pants. He tried to compose himself and check everything again. He must not ruin the thrill by pleasuring himself. Not when he would have her tonight.

“Soon my love, soon we will be together— at last. Until tonight,” he said as he walked out of the bedroom, closing and locking the door behind him.

Chapter 15

Illusions

The last few hours dragged. My mind was miles away and definitely not focused on the job. I asked Maria if she wanted to join us after work, but she had a hot date and was going straight home to prepare the lair!

At last it was 8:30 p.m. I got out of the hospital as soon as I could and hurried home to find Hayley waiting in the driveway.

I told her about Paul and the pregnancy and what I'd found out today. After a few coffees and some intense discussion we decided to jump on the computer and Google. What else would we find out? It was nice to huddle with a partner in crime while I tried to determine if my whole life had been a lie.

We found my mother’s marriage notice in the paper online. My heart sank. It was true. My mother and father had divorced and mum married a madman. We searched some more and found a story about my stepfather’s murder. He had been found ripped apart inside his car with all the doors and windows locked. No wonder Jenny’s story sounded familiar. Looks like the Ghost had saved me, too.