The Lost Years (The Guardians Book 4) (9 page)

“Sophie, we need to talk,” Uri began.

Shifting her attention, she moved in quickly, taking a seat at her friend’s side. “I guess everyone around here has to talk. Sorry, that sounded petty, of course, what is it?”

Uri took hold of her hand, wincing from the pain slightly as he did so. “We need to talk about the other night.”

“Huh?” Sophie asked in reply. She had completely forgotten about what he might be referring to. She had been so focused on the evacuation, as well as her returning memories, that everything else had slipped her mind.

“I think you know what I’m talking about,” Uri continued.

“No, really,” Sophie confirmed. “I’m lost.”

Uri rolled his eyes in disbelief before whispering, “The kiss.”

Sophie looked down at the bed in an effort not to laugh. “Oh, yes, of course. Uri—”

Before she could discount what had happened as a mistake, he interrupted her. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to hurt you, you’re my friend. I mean— I can’t believe I’m even saying this. I never believed in love at first sight. That was for, well—I don’t know who, but not for me. But now, she’s all I can think about. It’s crazy; I want this more than life.”

Sophie stared at her friend, confused. “What are you talking about?”

“Sera, I think I might love her.”

“What?” Sophie cried. This was not jealousy she felt, but instead disbelief. She remembered all the feelings she had for Uri as a friend. He was her best friend, and as such, she knew him and love never seemed to mix well. He would move from one infatuation to the next and never spoke of love. She didn’t know if she should worry about him getting hurt or him hurting this girl she didn’t know. Either way, she was certain someone would be walking away wounded. “Do you even know anything about her?”

“I know enough,” Uri defended his feelings.

“Like what? Where does she come from?”

“Sophie, it wouldn’t matter if she were here or not. I am never going to have the same feelings you have for me,” Uri replied.

“Huh?” Sophie gasped. “Are you insane?”

“Oh, come on, don’t play dumb.”

As the words left her lips, she thought about that night on the bluffs, the kiss … “Gabe!”

“That’s right, don’t you think we’ve done enough damage?”

Sophie remembered Gabe’s expression when he saw their kiss. She sighed, disappointed with herself and that she had put him through that.

“Where is he?” Sophie moaned.

“Who?”

“Gabe, you idiot,” Sophie spat at Uri, who cocked his head. He thought about how her response sounded like the old Sophie he knew.

“Sophie, is there something you need to tell me?” Uri asked.

She looked around the room, praying Gabe wasn’t in one of the beds. Shaking her head no, she looked back to Uri. “No, nothing. Do you know where Gabe is? I should apologize to him.”

“Dina didn’t tell you?”

“Tell me what?”

“He left.”

“What do you mean, he left?”

“He told Dina he couldn’t be here anymore; he packed up and hit the road before the attack ever took place.” Uri explained.

“What?” Sophie felt a panic rush over her. “We have to go find him. He’s not safe out there.”

“That’s what Haim and I were going to do when Rampart was attacked. But now—”

“What, why aren’t we out there?”

“Michael told me to leave him be.” Uri replied.

“No! Why would Michael say that?” Sophie questioned.

“Talk to Michael, I don’t understand it either. He says if Gabe wants to come back, he has to do it on his own and we have to leave him be.”

“That’s ridiculous!” Sophie shouted, hopping to her feet.

“What’s ridiculous?” Michael’s voice chimed behind the girl.

Spinning around, she came to stare him in the eye. “How can you just leave Gabe out there? You’re going to get him killed.”

“I don’t know if you’ve looked around lately, but Gabe is probably safer on his own. Don’t go against me on this, Sophie. He has to make his own choice; we can’t make him stay with us.”

“But he’s confused, he thinks things are the way they’re not.”

“What do you mean?” Michael asked. “Is there something you need to tell us, Sophie?”

She didn’t know why, but she could not bring herself to tell them that she had regained her memories. “No, forget it. I need to go, Dina needs me.”

Pushing past the group, Sophie ignored their calls after her, instead making her way to the small room where Dina sat. She stared at her friend who had her head lying on Raimie’s chest, her back severely arched as she leaned against the bed. Her heart sank. She missed Gabe, she needed to find him, but Michael was right, for now he was probably safer without them. In the present, she needed to be there for her dearest friend as she faced losing her one true love.

Sophie didn’t speak. Sophie didn’t speak, and silently approached Dina. Entangling her fingers into Dina’s, she rested her chest against her back in an embrace.

It seemed as though time stood still. The nurses and physicians avoided entering the room, leaving Raimie alone with Dina and Sophie for hours. Sophie held on to Dina until her legs went numb. Nervous she would no longer be able to stand, she released her hold, taking a seat in the corner.

Sophie stared at her friend. In a way she rejoiced, she had all of her memories back; the late night slumber parties, the camping trips, helping each other dress for the annual ball. She remembered when Dina and Raimie first started dating. They used to stay up late, giggling about what it would be like to kiss a boy, and once it finally happened with Raimie, Dina was more than happy to share the details. When Sophie was at her worst, when she was alone and feeling the weight of the guilt about her mother’s death, Dina was the one who pulled her out of the downward spiral.

Dina had always been there for her, now all Sophie wanted to do was take the pain away. She couldn’t though, there was nothing she could do except be there next to her. Sophie looked at Raimie; he was pale in color, a shade of blue hinting at the corners of his lips.

Dina pushed herself up and stared down at her great love. She didn’t acknowledge Sophie’s presence, but instead she began speaking directly to Raimie. “You promised me, you said you would always give me a reason to keep going. I can’t do this without you.”

“I’m here, Dina, I won’t leave you.” Before she even said the words, Sophie knew they would offer little comfort to her friend.

Dina didn’t shift her gaze from her sleeping prince, “It’s not right, you know.”

“I know, it’s messed up. I wish I would have been there to help him.” Sophie offered.

“No, it’s messed up that they aren’t doing more. They want to just let him die. It’s like they’ve just given up on him. He would never have given up on any of them, especially Michael,” Dina explained flatly, her voice lingering in a haunting way.

“Sweetie, I don’t think they are giving up on him. They just don’t know what else to do.” Sophie suggested.

“Did you know Calysta was imprisoned at Rampart?” Dina asked.

Sophie pursed her lips outward, puzzled by the random subject change. “The oracle?”

“Yes. She told me right before the attack. She can’t leave the caverns,” Dina added.

“You know how she is, are you sure you can believe her?”

“I believe her,” Dina didn’t offer further explanation.

“Well, if that’s true, I’m sure it’s because she did something to deserve such a punishment,” Sophie reassured her friend.

“Like Raimie deserves to have everyone give up on him? Like Gabe deserved to be expected to give up his life to save the world? I’m just as bad, I should have stopped him …” Dina’s voice trailed off, dripping with remorse.

“What do you mean you should have stopped him?” Sophie pressed.

“He came to me, just before he left Rampart. Calysta told me I would have a choice.”

“Who came to you?” Sophie pushed her friend for answers in a panic.

“Gabe.”

“Wait, what kind of choice?” Sophie quickly followed up.

Ignoring her question, Dina asked her own. “When did your memories come back?”

“What?” Sophie gasped in shock.

“When did they return?” Dina repeated.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sophie insisted.

“I knew the moment you held me, it was my old friend,” Dina said.

“Please don’t tell anyone,” Sophie pleaded.

“I won’t. Although, I’m not really sure why you wouldn’t want everyone to know,” Dina replied.

“I don’t know, I guess there’s enough going on. I don’t really want any of the attention right now. Plus, I’m not really sure what I want anyone knowing; once people know I have my memories back, they will expect me to handle things a certain way.”

“You mean how people will expect you to deal with Gabe.”

“Yeah, and honestly, I’m not sure what the hell I’m going to do yet,” Sophie began before inquiring. “What did you mean by Calysta said you would have a choice to make? Was she talking about Gabe?”

“Yes.”

Sophie waited for a moment for Dina to continue, but she was silent as she stared at Raimie. “Well? I mean, seriously? That’s it?”

“Oh, sorry,” Dina replied. “I just can’t stand seeing him like this. I keep thinking he’s about to jump up. Umm— let me see, she was talking about what would happen if he stayed.”

“At Rampart?”

“Yes. She knew he was going to leave and told me that if he stayed, once you got your memories back, the two of you would get back together,” Dina answered.

“I see— and that’s a bad thing, why?” Sophie laughed awkwardly in response.

“It was more what it would lead to if the two of you were together.”

“I don’t understand.”

Dina glanced at her friend and then back to Raimie. “She said if the two of you were together, and he stayed with the Guardians, he would never fulfill his destiny as the protector. She said his happiness now would damn mankind.”

“No, that’s not right— it can’t be,” Sophie said, almost pleading with herself.

“I’m just telling you what she told me. That’s why when he came to me I let him go, but I was wrong, I should have begged him to stay. Maybe if he were there, Raimie—”

“Maybe Gabe would be lying there instead of Raimie?” Sophie snarled.

“No, that’s not what I meant … oh, I don’t know what I mean anymore,” Dina said, a tear escaping and rolling down her cheek.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that, I know this is hard on you,” Sophie added, and with that the girls fell silent. Neither knew what to say to the other.

Almost twenty minutes of silence passed before they heard a voice from the doorway. It was Michael. “Sophie, Uri told me you found out about Gabe and he was worried about you. He said you seemed pretty upset. Are you feeling alright?”

“Of course,” Sophie quickly replied.

“Can I ask you a question?” Michael prompted.

“Anything.” Sophie replied with a nod.

“Are you starting to regain your memories?” Michael asked plainly.

Sophie didn’t look at Dina; she hoped her friend would respect her wishes and remain silent. “No, sir. I— well, I guess I felt bad, like maybe Gabe left because of me. I would hate to think I caused everyone’s friend to leave.”

“I see, well don’t feel bad. Gabe made a choice for himself and what he needed, it had nothing to do with you, alright?”

Sophie nodded, trying not to look her mentor in the eyes for fear he might see through her lies.

Michael turned to walk away, but Dina quickly grabbed his arm. He hesitated, looking to the small girl. “Yes, what is it?” his voice was tender and loving.

“Is Rampart lost?” Dina asked.

“I’m afraid so,” he answered. “Our scouts say it’s overrun with legions of Baal’s foot soldiers.”

“Is Calysta still there?” Dina asked, staring Michael coldly in the eyes.

“I beg your pardon?” Michael answered firmly with his own question.

“You heard me, is Calysta still there?”

“I don’t appreciate your tone, Dina, but I understand you’re under a lot of stress, so I’ll let it go for now. And as far as your question, yes, I suppose she is,” Michael replied, remaining controlled and calm in his response.

“And are we going to launch a rescue mission for her?” Dina insisted.

“She’s safe in her home,” Michael reassured her.

“Why is that, sir?”

“What did you say?”

“Is she safe because her home’s a prison cell?”

“Look, Dina, I know you’re upset, but I can only overlook your insubordination so long—”

“No, sir, you’re right, I am upset, but I don’t want you to overlook anything. Calysta told me about how only Guardians can enter and exit the caverns. She’s a prisoner, is she not?” Dina pushed back.

“She’s a guest of the Guardians,” Michael replied, turning to walk away.

“Then shouldn’t we retrieve our guest?” Dina offered sarcastically.

“I’m not discussing this anymore. Do you understand?” Michael’s voice was firm.

Dina stood silently glaring at the man she had once respected so much and then barked, “Yes, sir.” She added a salute at the end for good measure.

He exited the room without another word, ignoring the young girl’s behavior.