The Light Tamer (20 page)

I lean over and pretend to tie my shoe, in case I get caught eavesdropping.

“Can’t or won’t? Fix her, give me back my sweet granddaughter,” Grandma’s voice gets higher as she talks.

“I’d suggest that you all remind her of who she was. Gayle, you’ll have to accept the fact that she is more than likely in this for good with Clark. He is a good kid…lost at times but good. The sooner Caleb accepts it, the sooner his heart will heal.”

I hear shuffling of what sounds like cookie sheets and hear Grandma lose her cool. “You honestly believe his heart will heal? You’re crazier than I thought. He will never heal from this. Jessie is the girl for him and now…time is limited to bring her back.”

Suddenly I feel a hand on my shoulder. I try to stifle my scream to no avail as I fall sideways into the wall.

“You’re lurking in the hall and missing out on all of the Jessie loves or
did
love Caleb talks,” Amber says.

“We better get in there before grandma pisses Fate off.” I take Amber’s hand and drag her with me into the kitchen. I grab a couple of glasses out of the cabinet and fill them with milk as Mrs. Ward and grandma continue their talk.

Mrs. Ward clears her voice and nods her head at us. “Hello ladies, Jessie I am hoping you’re feeling better.”

“I do feel better physically, but as far as mentally goes, I don’t. I don’t feel anything at all. I keep hearing about how into Caleb I was, but now I don’t feel for him at all,” I blurt out at once.

Mrs. Ward takes a sip of her coffee and motions for me to sit next to her at the breakfast table. “Jessie, have you spent any time with him alone? The issue with Erebus was beyond my control. One of the problems about mixing the past with the present is I as a Fate can’t really tell exactly what will happen. The past has to stay in the past and to make that happen, sacrifices were made.”

I break apart my chocolate chip cookie to make it fit in my glass of milk. “I don’t want anything bad to happen to Caleb, but he is a little annoying. Don’t get me wrong, he seems like a nice guy, will he bond with someone else?”

Amber pats me on the back. “Ah B, that’s sweet. You do care, I knew it.”

“No, not sweet…he’s getting on my nerves. The sooner he finds someone to bond with, the sooner he’s off of my back.”

Grandma gasps at my confession. “Mrs. Ward, this is exactly what I was talking about. My Jessie would never have said anything so rude.”

“Rude? Whatever, I wasn’t rude, I was honest.” I say and shove the rest of my cookie in my mouth. “You’re Fate and you don’t have the answers, how
am I
supposed feel about the situation?” My chair barks as I slide it on the floor to stand up.

“
Jessie, know that I’ll always love you. I’ll find a way to fix this
.” My heart skips a beat as I hear the words in my head. “This thing is becoming crazier by the minute. I’m hearing his voice prattling in my head now.” I take my glass and wash it out in the sink. “While I’m thinking about it, Clark said he’d totally dig going to Busch Gardens with us.”

Amber thrusts her glass at me. “If Clark goes, I’m not. Jess, something about him isn’t right.”

My body goes rigid all over. Now the anger permeates through my veins. Throwing the dishtowel in the sink I storm off to my room. My
sucks
list is getting longer by the moment. Is there anyone around here that isn’t ‘team Caleb’, I mean seriously.

I grab my wetsuit and pack my duffle bag with my gear so I’ll be ready when Clark gets here. It’s hard for me to believe everyone that Caleb is right for me. Sure, he’s great looking, but he is too damned nice. Clark is edgy and doesn’t give a rats ass about what other people think.

I look up and see grandma standing in the doorway with her arms crossed. She looks older somehow, there are dark circles under her eyes and her mouth is drawn down. “Jess, we need to talk before Clark gets here. Finish packing your gear and meet me in my room.”

“Yes ma’am.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Like a child on the way to the principal’s office, I walk as slowly as humanly possible down the hall to grandma’s bedroom. A swirl of thoughts radiate through me. Everyone keeps telling me how wonderful Caleb and I were as a couple, yet I have no memories. It’s as if he never existed in my life. Grandma told me that he and I would go to the beach together every summer until he moved away. I remember his mother, she was petite and beautiful and I know his father, but I don’t know him.

I lightly knock on the double door to her room. “Come in Jessie,” Grandma says.

The powder blue room with white woodwork and crystal chandeliers give the room a glamorous beachy vibe. The white crushed velvet chairs and white area rugs scream sophistication. “Before you say anything, I want to say I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be disrespectful.” I walk over to where she sits and give her a hug.

“Jessie, I know this sounds like we hate Clark, but we don’t. What we want for you…is your true mate. Clark isn’t that guy, Caleb is. You may not remember it now, but sooner or later you will. I worry that you’ll compromise your virtue to a guy that isn’t your true love.”

I flop down on one of the chairs and tuck my legs under me. My bare feet love the feeling of velvet. “Virtue? I might not remember Caleb, but I remember my morals, so rest your troubled mind,” I say and smile at her.

“Good to know,” says the now familiar voice of Caleb.

I cross my arms and glare at the two of them. “Caleb, let me guess, you called crying to MY grandma that you miss me. You sure as hell won’t get me back with your underhanded manipulations.”

“It wasn’t either of theirs idea Jessica, it was mine,” says my dad.

“Daddy!” I run up and throw my arms around him. “I didn’t know you were around.”

He sits down on the velvet loveseat and motions for me to sit with him. “Jessie, listen…I’ve heard about Erebus and how your bond was broken with Caleb. Trust me when I say that you have to rekindle the bond. Eventually, you’ll remember him and if it’s too late, well there isn’t anything you can do.”

I mentally shake my head back and forth at the thought of another person trying to shove him down my throat. “Daddy, I don’t remember a bond with him at all. How can I make something out of nothing?” I plead.

He puts his arm around my shoulder and I suddenly feel uncomfortable. “You aren’t trying to drain my light are you?”

“No, not just no…but hell no. Jessie, I’m here to protect you,” he said.

“I’m sorry, it’s just everything feels out of place. I know you know that feeling, hell… you always checked the locks over and over again.”

A noise from the other side of the room reminds me that Caleb is in the room. He walks over to the crowded sitting area; but his eyes stay locked with mine. The flutter in my stomach catches me off guard. I feel everyone staring at me as I watch Caleb.

I remind myself that everyone is here to help me piece my life together. I concentrate on taking deep controlled breaths to keep my temper at bay.

His eyes never falter as he continues to lock eyes with me. My mouth feels dry, as if I’ve not had a drink of water in days. Something about him is familiar, like those déjà vu moments. The room is void of noise except for the pounding of my heart. He is handsome, I admit to myself. He’d be my type of guy if I were his type of girl. He looks more like a popular girl’s boyfriend, not like anyone who could be attracted to me.

“Can I have five minutes alone with you Jess?” He asks in an intimate way.

If five minutes will satisfy his uncontrollable urge to drive me crazy, so-be-it.
“I guess, but know that Clark will be here soon. I can’t imagine what difference you think you’ll make.” “Jessie, please say yes.” There’s that voice again, inside of my head. I squint at him quizzically, wondering if he knows he’s talking in my head.

“Whatever, I’ll give you the five minutes.” I turn and face my dad and tell them they can go.

Caleb mouths the words thank you to me.

“You look pretty, are you feeling better?”

“I feel fine. As a matter of fact, I never felt bad, only tired and confused.” It’s impossible to deny that I’m attracted to him. He sits down next to me on the loveseat. My thoughts begin to tumble around in my head.
“Jessie, I mean it when I say I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you.”
His hand reaches across and he strokes the side of my face, I catch myself closing my eyes at his touch.

“I feel the electricity Jess, and from the look on your face, you do too.” His hand slowly goes behind my neck. No matter how hard I try to find the words to stop him, my body begs for more.
My thoughts are jumbles of craziness. Why am I reacting this way? I suddenly feel exposed, my head and heart are conflicted
.

“Honestly, I don’t know what I feel. I don’t know, really I don’t.” My voice cracks as I speak and my eyes sting with tears.

“Because we belong together Jessie, because I’m the peanut butter to your jelly. Close your eyes, please.” His hands glide across my bare shoulders and I feel him scoot closer to me. Instinctively I expose my neck to him for kisses I’m dying to feel.

I try mentally to deny this moment as it blazes words into my heart, and then slowly trails up to my lips. Every single ounce of my self control is gone. His lips gently press to mine, and I feel it…dangling me from a string from my heart. Every nerve ending is screaming in pleasure. My body scoots closer to him until neither air nor indifference can get through. My lips part and like a tsunami of emotions, my heart bursts open with love. Tears well up in my eyes as the realization of everything hits me at once. I pull away and put my hands over my face, trying to hide my shame. Our one kiss brought forth his memories of me turning on him in the hospital. His broken heart as I shunned his love. My hand trembles as I reach up and touch his face.

“Caleb, how can I ever make it up to you? I’m so sorry.” My heart aches with the pain that he has felt over the past week. “I never meant to hurt you. Will you ever forgive me?” I cry into his shoulder. I feel him sigh; it occurs to me in that minute that maybe he can’t forgive me.

“Shhhhh, Jessie, there isn’t anything to forgive. You didn’t know what was happening.” Caleb put his hand under my chin and lifted it up. “He never did anything to disrespect you did he?”

I shake my head back and forth. “No, he was fine. I’m glad I don’t have to learn to surf now though.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too,” I say.

Without warning, Amber comes storming into the room. “Holy crap, five minutes and you’re playing tonsil hockey like pros. Please tell me that you’re back to the sweet Jess and not uber bitch Jess.”

The three of us burst out laughing.

“Your date is here, have fun with that. I think he knows something is up; he came in and started yelling at grandma about breaking the bond. Well, it didn’t last long…between Mrs. Ward and Ms. Gayle, he has been put in his place. He said he won’t leave until he sees you, good luck.”

Caleb takes my hand and his light pulsates through our touch. Like water through pipes, his love rushes through every cell of my body. “I’ll go with you. I don’t mean to be mean, but I will enjoy it a little.”

I smack his arm before hooking mine through his. “Let’s get it over with.” I say as we start for the door. And like that, we’re back to us.

“Oh snap, I’m going too. He’s such an ass, I’m going to get it all on video!” Amber says as she bounces around in circles around us.

~~~~~~~~~~

I can’t believe I have to wear this stupid uniform. I smooth down the white blouse as I tuck it into the pleated skirt. “Mom, do I really have to wear this dumb flat tie? It’s seven hundred trillion degrees outside and I will die before the end of the day.”

Mom shakes her head back and forth as she has done every time I flip out about clothes. “Jessie, you have three minutes before Caleb is here. You know as well as I do that he’ll be on time. If I were a betting woman, I bet he’ll think you look cute. You rock a school uniform like nobody’s business. I’ll see you at dinner,” she says and kisses me on the cheek.

Like clockwork, Caleb pulls up at exactly seven o’clock. “Bye! I’ll be home by five. Mom, did you sign the work permit? The bakery said if I bring it by after school today, I can start on Wednesday.”