The Lady of Toryn Anthology (Lady of Toryn trilogy) (69 page)

She snorted though her tears, wiping uselessly at
her face with dirty hands. “I don’t care about the books, you moron.”

He lapsed into a confused kind of silence, and
Ashlyn laughed humorlessly, imagining what must be going through his head. Skye
was hopeless at emotional support.

She took a deep breath.
This isn’t the end of the world, Ash. This is your chance to do the
right thing, the unselfish thing.

“I need your help,” she said, sniffling. “Aaron
needs to go to Cosmea…tonight. I need Aik here, and I need to send a letter
with Aaron so Aik knows what to bring with him.”

Skye didn’t say anything, and when she looked up at
him, the expression on his face was skeptical.

“Skye,” she said gently, touching his hand. “Trust
me. You want me to be a leader. That’s what I’m doing. I promise. Can you
please just go wake Aaron up and tell him to get ready to leave?”

The blond swordsmen finally nodded. “Do you need
help getting up?”

She shook her head. “I’ll be fine.”

He left, jumping effortlessly over the giant
bookcase one more time. Ashlyn climbed to her feet slowly, her body aching, her
heart splintering within her.

Chapter
Eight

To
the Edge

The ninja threw a punch at Ashlyn, then another, and
she blocked them both, taking a step back to steady herself before making a jab
at his throat. He blocked that one too, and they parried back and forth,
neither quite gaining the advantage nor losing ground.

“What are you doing to do?” Restyn Li, Lord of
Toryn, asked Ashlyn as he smoothly threw up a fist to block her swing.

He was as young as she remembered him from her
childhood, or maybe younger still, appearing close to her age. Ashlyn landed a
blow to his chest using the heel of her hand, and quickly dropped into a leg
sweep, but he jumped over it and flipped aside, surprising her with his
agility.

“You’re in better shape than I remember,” she said,
deliberately avoiding his question.

“Unexpected, is it not?” he said, grinning, his dark
eyes sparkling. “This is the first time we have been equally matched, you and
I. Even death has its own rewards.”

She jumped forward at that, but he managed to block
or dodge her flurry of punches, still grinning.

“There’s nothing rewarding at all about you being
dead,” she snapped, finally giving up and backing off. “All it means is that
I’m left with a whole lot of unanswered questions and really tough decisions to
make.”

“You are not the first Li to feel that way.” He
whirled, arms extended as he moved towards her, attacking her with each fist in
turn as he spun.

Ashlyn grabbed his forearm and twisted, using his
momentum to flip Lord Li over her shoulder. He somersaulted over her back and
landed neatly, lifting one booted foot and driving it at her midsection. Ashlyn
turned twice, tried to elbow him in the side of the head, but he was turning
too, perfectly evading her attack.

“I’m not a Li at all,” she retorted, out of breath.
“And you’re really ticking me off by insisting that I am. I’ve had enough of
your lies for a lifetime.”

He stopped, dropping his fists and straightening.
His eyes were like coal, boring into her so intensely that Ashlyn squirmed
under his stare. “You risked your life to avenge my death, Ashlyn. Surely you
do not expect me to believe that you are renouncing our blood ties.”

She shrugged awkwardly. “I can’t renounce something
that wasn’t mine in the first place. I still love you, Dad, and I always will,
but you let me grow up believing a lie. Now everything’s gone. Everything I
ever thought was mine…it’s all gone. What do I do now? What am I supposed to
do? I’ve wasted the last month trying to become the leader you told me I was
destined to be. Now I’m nothing. I’m not the Elder Heir- I’m not even a true
Toryn.” She shook her head, touching a hand to her temple, frustrated at the
swirling, conflicting emotions within her. “And I’m tired of listening to
myself whine about it. I’m tired of thinking about it! Why am I even here?”

“This is your dream,” her father pointed out.

“Then why are
you
here? Why are you haunting me? Aren’t you happy with your handiwork? Can’t
you just leave me alone?” She turned away, irritated.

They were suddenly on top of Na Michico again, where
she’d fought Kou just before Drake had shot him. Gravel crunched beneath her
feet. The sky was gray above her, the clouds churning ominously.

“Am I a ghost?” Lord Li said, stepping up beside
her. “Who is to say I am not a figment of your imagination? Perhaps you
conjured me up, looking for redemption.”

“If that were the case, I’d have wished you away
long before now,” she replied grumpily. “There is no redemption for what I’ve
done.”

“My sweet girl,” he chided gently, reaching out to
touch his fingers to her chin and turn her face towards him. “No one passes
through life without fault. I could have rescinded my decision to Scorn your sister
at any time over the past three years. I could have revealed her parentage and
saved you the heartache of finding out yourself. I chose not to, for my own
selfish reasons. At this very moment you are presented with a chance to redeem
yourself, and yet you are struggling with that decision. Why do you insist on
bearing the weight of the world on your shoulders?”

Ashlyn looked at her dad, noting the clean lines of
his face, the youthful gleam in his dark eyes, the sweep of raven hair that
cascaded sleekly down his shoulders. He was the man she’d adored unequivocally
as a child, the father who had all but disappeared from her life after the war
had begun.

“I guess I don’t have to,” she conceded, “but-
honestly, Dad, I just wish you’d told me the truth. It hurts that you lied to
me for so long.”

He nodded. “I know.”

He didn’t apologize, and for that she was glad.
Ashlyn hugged him tightly, resting her head against his chest and wishing
fitfully that she’d had more time with him- or maybe that she hadn’t wasted the
time she was given. It was much too late now, and nothing she could do or say,
even in her dreams, would change that.

“I am so proud of you, Ashlyn,” he murmured against
her hair.

“Thanks, Dad.” She sniffled a little, and pulled
back, rubbing at her eyes. “Maybe next time you show up in my dreams you can
bring some cards. I bet I can still beat you at gin rummy.”

“You always cheated,” he responded lightly, then
grew more serious. “I will not be coming back, Ashlyn.”

She tried to keep her tone even. “Bored with
haunting me already?”

He was watching her face closely, looking for a
reaction. “Today is your nineteenth birthday. You have grown into a beautiful,
capable young woman. Perhaps I can see that you are ready to move on with your
life, and I have no place in it.”

She chucked him lightly in the shoulder, and he
caught her hand. “You’ll always have a place in my life, Dad.”

He turned her wrist, kissing her palm. “I will
always be watching, Ashlyn. You will see me…if you look hard enough.”

“What am I supposed to look for?” she asked, but
then someone was shaking her shoulders, and she started awake, surprised to see
Restlyn crouching in front of her.

“What are you doing out here?” the older girl asked
in exasperation. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you!”

Ashlyn blinked, and her surroundings slowly came
into focus. She was slumped against the side of the stone waterfall in the
memorial pagoda. To her left was the cobblestone walkway, and to her right was
the tranquil pond where her father’s urn floated, surrounded by lilies and lily
pads.
 

“I couldn’t sleep,” she said thickly, and struggled
into a sitting position, rubbing at her eyes. “That was lousy timing, Restlyn.
I was having a…a really intriguing dream.”

“I hope you were reciting your coronation speech in
your dream,” Restlyn replied sternly, “because that’s what’s happening in two
hours.”

“Two hours?” Ashlyn bolted upright. “Is Aaron back
yet?”

“No. Skye said he’d try to make it back before the
ceremony.” Restlyn sat back on her heels, eyes questioning. “Why does Aik need
to be here anyway?”

Ashlyn did not feel like explaining at this point.
“I just…want him here. I hope they hurry.” It was practically superhuman to
expect Aaron to make the trip to and from Cosmea in just one night, but for all
their sakes, she was pinning her hopes on him. “I…I guess I do need to write my
acceptance speech, huh?” She’d never been particularly good at public speaking.

“That’s probably a good idea.” Restlyn stood,
brushing a strand of chocolate-colored hair out of her eyes, and held out her
hand to help Ashlyn up.

Ashlyn accepted the hand and stood, picking up the
book of naming from the floor beside her. “Did you guys get the library all
cleaned up?”

“I didn’t- not personally. But some of the soldiers
finished the job. They, um, took care of Kou, too. He had this on him,” Restlyn
said, drawing a green stane from her pocket and holding it out. “It was the
only stane he had.”

As Ashlyn took the
shift
stane from her sister, a lump formed in her throat. The gem
hummed with magic against her palm. It was the last of the
shift
stanes, her final link to the magic that was indigenous to
the Li bloodline.

“Why…why didn’t you destroy it?” she asked, her
voice rasping.

“I don’t know,” Restlyn answered. “I guess I thought
maybe you’d want it.”

Could she blame the magic for ruining her life?
Today’s events were the meeting point of so many separate paths. Ashlyn closed
her fingers over the stane.

“Thanks,” she said. “I guess I’d better get to work
on my speech.”

But she didn’t work on her speech. Instead, she
found herself sitting at a low table several minutes later, dipping an
old-fashioned quill pen into an inkwell.

Dear
Vargo,
she wrote, and paused, thinking about what was going
to happen today. Would Aik arrive in time? The documents she’d asked him to
bring were essential to her plan, and if he wasn’t at the coronation, then
Ashlyn wasn’t sure if the Toryn people would believe her outrageous claims.

Of course, it was still possible for her to keep
silent and accept coronation as Lady of Toryn herself. Ashlyn felt a pang of
guilt at the thought- but she knew that if it came to that, Aik would stand by
her. Aaron, on the other hand, would be furious that she’d made him fly all the
way to Cosmea and back for nothing. She’d have to come up with a good story to
pacify the old pilot.

She looked down at the letter, and wondered what to
say to Vargo. She missed him terribly, but there wasn’t much to say to him that
would make their situation any better.

She crossed out
Vargo
and wrote
Drake
instead, then
rolled her eyes at her silliness and crumpled the paper into a ball. She
wouldn’t know where to send a letter for Drake even if she did write one, and
if she did know where to send it, she was pretty sure the vampire wouldn’t appreciate
seeing Vargo’s name crossed out before his.

Ashlyn busied herself with getting ready for the
coronation ceremony. She meticulously combed her hair, brushed her teeth, and
scrubbed her face with cold water, trying to put some color into her pale cheeks.
She was so nervous she couldn’t bear the thought of trying to eat breakfast, so
she chewed on a sprig of mint from her father’s tiny indoor herb garden
instead.

Ashlyn knelt beside the tiny pots, touching one
bright green bay leaf. They were out of season, but indoors it didn’t matter
much. Restlyn had obviously been doting on the little plants. That was one
thing Ashlyn would never have been able to handle- she had a black thumb, or
whatever the opposite was of a green thumb, and no plant stayed alive for
longer than a few weeks under her care.

Restlyn stepped into the room, sliding the door shut
behind her. She wore a pale blue, knee-length dress with short sleeves, in
defiance of the cold weather outside.
 
“Are you ready?” she asked. She had the ceremonial kimono and its obi
draped over one arm.

Ashlyn stared dubiously at the brightly-colored
kimono. “Restlyn, I…” She trailed off. Could she do it? Give up ladyship of
Toryn to Restlyn? Surrender her birthright- on her birthday, no less?

Why
should I have to?
she thought suddenly, a burst of anger
unfurling in her gut.
She
had trained
for leadership,
she
had suffered her
father’s mood swings while Restlyn had left, run off to join Skye in fighting
Lord Angelo. Restlyn had a tavern to go back to, a business she’d started
herself and was proud of. What did Ashlyn have?

I
have my birthright. That’s it. If I give that up, I’ll have nothing.

“I’m ready,” she said finally, and her heart did a
somersault, lodging somewhere in her throat.

She left her clothes on as Restlyn slipped the
kimono over her shoulders. Ashlyn stared at herself in the mirror. She was
completely swallowed in the huge kimono, the sleeves reaching well past her
fingertips, the hem pooling at her feet. Restlyn bunched up the kimono under
the obi as she tied the elaborate sash so that at least Ashlyn could walk, but
without a tailor there was nothing they could do about the sleeves.