As frantic as the morning felt for me, it was slowing down a bit thanks to my friends. I made a mental note to be sure to include every detail of my appreciation for them on this day in my journal.
With Dawn on a mission to bring me a sexy strapless bra and underwear, Kerry worked on me. She started by filing and painting a clear coat of polish on the nails of my fingers and toes. Then she blow-dried my hair and took a fat curling iron to the ends. When I saw myself in the mirror I almost cried. She’d styled me perfectly. I looked like myself, but with a slight flare of something more. I shook my head, disbelieving how I’d planned to walk up to Wes without attempting any sort of wow factor. With this look, I knew he’d be surprised.
My usual hairstyle was either a ponytail with bangs swept across my forehead or down and straight. Today, Kerry had given my layers a nice fullness with more flare at the ends and my bangs fanned more to the side and back. It was Sophie on special order.
“Thank you,” I said turning to give her a hug.
The butterflies in my stomach were having a major party. I couldn’t believe how nervous I felt. I sucked in a deep breath as a knock sounded at my door.
“Come in,” I called.
The door crept open and my mom eased her way in. “Hey guys. I’ve got some lunch. Oh, your hair looks amazing.”
“Thanks, but I’m
really
not hungry,” I said quickly.
“I knew you’d say that, which is why I brought you something light.”
“I’m okay, really.”
“You won’t be if you don’t eat something now.”
“I’ll have some, Mrs. Slone,” Kerry piped in. “What is it?”
“Crackers with port wine cheese and some fresh fruit.”
“Yum, thanks,” she said.
My mom held out the plate and returned her gaze to me. “The crackers will keep you from throwing up with nerves, and the sharp cheese will take the edge off.”
With hopes of relieving both of those symptoms, I folded and practically snatched the tray and coveted it on my bed. Kerry and I ate all the food while my mom gave me advice on settling my nerves and enjoying the moment.
By the time we finished the snack, our mouths were dry as a desert. “I guess you’ll have to come down and say hello to your guests, then,” my mom said with a sly smile, making it obvious she forgot the drinks on purpose.
I took a quick look down at myself, and even though I was in a robe, it was long and decent, so we went downstairs. Tom was talking to Kerry’s boyfriend Rich in the living room. I said my hellos and then snuck a bottle of water just in time for Dawn to return with a pink bag tucked under her arm.
“Gotta go,” I said pulling Kerry by the arm.
“Okay, we’ll need to leave in an hour, so come down so we can take some pictures before we go.”
“Alright.”
I ran up the stairs with Dawn and Kerry like we were up to no good. Although I don’t know why. I was about to be married, so the idea of going there with Wes shouldn’t make me feel guilty.
The more I thought about it, the more I knew that was the wrong word to describe how I felt. It wasn’t guilty, it was . . . nervous.
Really nervous.
“You ready?” Dawn asked with her hand still tucked in the bag. “By the way,” she continued, “I should get an award for this.”
I shifted my weight wondering what raunchy setup she’d bought me. Slowly, with anticipation building, she slid out a neatly folded matching bra and panty set.
“It’s perfect,” announced Kerry as she took them and held them up.
“Wow.” I was actually impressed. They were red lace with an overlay of embroidered pink lace that softened the color. It was definitely special-occasion worthy, with a steamy flare, toned down with a touch of innocence. It couldn’t have represented how I felt any better. “I love them,” I agreed.
“I told you. Award-worthy.”
“So what do you want?” I asked, willing to negotiate.
Without even thinking about it, she replied, “I want to be a fly on the wall when he first sees you in them.”
“Absolutely not,” I answered quickly, unable to hold back a smile.
“What? I just want to see his eyes bulge.”
The mention of his eyes actually being on me made me shudder.
“Don’t be nervous,” Kerry said.
“I can’t help it. Do you have any idea what this means?”
“Uh, yeah. I think we do,” Dawn interrupted. “Now take the bull by the horns and run with it.”
“Dawn, it’s not funny. I’m serious.”
Kerry laughed, but then decided to take the mature route. “Okay, okay, okay. Don’t worry about it, Sophie. Stop thinking of the actual process and just think about Wes. Think about how he makes you feel when he kisses and touches you, and you guys will be fine.”
Think about how he makes me feel.
I took a deep breath, remembering and relaxing more with each intake.
“What did I do to deserve such a good friend?” I asked.
She reached out for a hug that led to the longest embrace we’d had in the history of our friendship.
“
I
get the goods, and
she
gets the award. Nice,” Dawn quipped with her arms crossed.
She looked hurt and offended, but Kerry took charge before I could.
“Oh, stop pouting and get over here.”
We pulled her into a group hug until it turned corny and Dawn broke off. “Okay, I’m good,” she said.
From there, I asked them for a few moments alone and they obligingly went downstairs while I changed into my dress. It fit like a glove and staring at myself in the full-length mirror made me feel pretty and sexy at the same time.
I hadn’t talked to Wes since last night when my mom had made me say goodbye to him and then confiscated my phone, so I was more than ready to see him.
I took one more satisfied look in the mirror, took a deep breath, and then made my way downstairs. I’m not sure if it was the dress, hairstyle, or undergarments, but I felt confident and ready.
I turned the corner to the living room and saw the proud, smiling faces of Kerry and Dawn, and the awed expressions of everyone else.
My mom’s face was the first to turn from surprise to a smile. “Sophie, you look absolutely stunning.”
I felt good, but stunning, I’m not so sure. I must’ve shrugged, because my mom zeroed in on me. “Oh, you do. Believe me. It’s perfect.”
I smiled and thanked her and she hugged me while Tom started snapping away with the camera. “If your father misses this, I’ll never forgive him,” she whispered in my ear.
I jerked back. “He’s really coming?”
“He said he was, but he was supposed to be here an hour ago.”
For a moment I was annoyed she’d not only put this reunion on me at a time like this, but filled me in on the possible failure of it—just when I was feeling calm. But the feeling dissipated when my thoughts turned back to this day.
Even still, the possibility of his not coming now seemed rude.
“Sophie, you look great,” Rich said.
“Thank you,” I said pushing memories of my dad out of my head.
My mom looked at her watch and got nervous, so she hurried us outside to take some pictures by the garden. The first few were of my friends and me in front of my mom’s rose bushes.
Next, my mom slipped the camera to Kerry who took some of us with Tom. I felt happy, but every now and then my thoughts traveled back to the pictures of Amelia and Lenny. I couldn’t help wondering whether, fifty years from now, someone else would be looking at these pictures and thinking about how happy I looked.
I blinked away the heavy reflections and found myself smiling and laughing in the moment. It is a good day, I reminded myself.
“Come on, Sophie,” my mom chirped, “a few more pictures. Let’s do some of just you.”
Those were by far the most awkward. It was strange having all eyes on me. I can say with confidence that the limelight is just not for me, but I turned whichever way I was told and smiled away. It was fine for a while, until it seemed like pictures were taking way too long.
“Mom, I’m ready to go,” I announced. And I was. There was not one ounce of hesitation or nervousness at that point. I think taking pictures with my family and friends was nice, but Wes was missing because he was waiting at the Overlook for me. I felt totally incomplete, and one hundred percent ready to see him.
“Just a few more.”
“Mom.”
She looked around nervously and dropped her shoulders. At that point I realized she had been stalling. But what for? Before I could come up with my own theories, a black limo pulled up and my mom let out a huge sigh of relief.
“Mom, a limo? This isn’t necessary.” Though it would’ve been a little lame to pull up to the Overlook in my mom’s Honda.
“Yes, it is,” she said. “You deserve every bit of this, and I wouldn’t have you miss it for the world.”
I was about to question her assumption that a limo would mean that much to me when the door opened, causing me to hold my breath before my brain even thought to. Getting out of the back was a tall man with black and gray hair, slicked back, and a matching mustache. His black suit hugged his broad shoulders and growing midsection.
When our gazes met, my eyes immediately began to water behind the hot emotions flowing through me: confusion, anger, surprise, regret, and lurking somewhere underneath, joy. His eyes also watered and he showed no signs of hiding the fact, because he had a handkerchief at the ready.
Even though it had been about ten years since I’d seen him and seven years since we’d talked, I knew without a doubt it was my father standing there, waiting for my reaction
N
umerous thoughts ran through my mind including shaking my mother for placing me in an awkward situation like this, in front of my friends. But as time froze around us, I realized that now probably was the best time to pull this surprise on me. She knew I wouldn’t cause a scene in front of everyone and ruin my big day.
Although I’d missed the command that came from my brain, my feet slowly started moving in his direction. He met me halfway across the grass, still dabbing the corners of his eyes.
“Você é linda,” he said so low I could barely make it out. My Portuguese was practically nonexistent, but I remembered enough to know he’d called me beautiful.
“Thank you,” I said, having a hard time maintaining eye contact. Avoiding his gaze, I saw everyone else staring at us. I quickly turned back to him.
“Hello, Sophie,” he said with a heavy accent. He seemed a little nervous and shy, and it made me wonder how he and my mother had ended up together. She had told me they’d met in college. She was attracted to the tall, dark, and handsome look and one year, when he didn’t have anywhere to go for Thanksgiving, she’d invited him to eat with her family.
A year later, they got married, but after I was born he wanted to go back to Brazil, and she didn’t. At first she said the separation was amicable with promises that he’d visit. He ended up coming once a year until she decided to divorce and change our names back to her maiden one. After that, his visits turned into phone calls, and eventually I just found other calls to look forward to.
Now, he was standing in front of me on my wedding day, looking at me like I’d just taken my first steps. That’s
all
I kept thinking, so I reminded him.
“I’m getting married, Dad.”
I don’t know what sort of response I expected, but he just nodded. “I know. I want to be there today. For you.”
Before I could respond, my mom walked over and touched him on the shoulder.
“Davi, we’re glad you made it,” she said warmly.
“Gayle,” he said smiling, as if he’d just remembered how pretty she was.
She cut off any further conversation. “It’s time to go. You’ll take Sophie in the limo, We’ll ride ahead. Just walk her up to the groom, and that’s it. Okay?”
Wait, walk me up to the groom. “Wait, Mom.” I grabbed her arm before she could turn away. “What do you mean walk me?”
“Your father has flown here for your wedding, and he wants to walk you down the aisle. I think someone should escort you.”
“But I don’t need anyone to walk me. I’m fine.”
My dad placed his hand over top of mine, while it was still resting on my mom’s forearm. “Sophie, I would like to walk you, but the decision is yours.”
I looked around and everyone was watching the reunion like a bomb would go off if anyone moved an inch.
The last thing I wanted was an argument or feelings of disappointment today.
“Alright,” I agreed, softly.
“Great, now come on,
someone’s
waiting for you,” my mom lured.
I sucked in a breath and was escorted to the limo. Inside on the seat, my mom had placed a small bouquet of white roses with peach tips. I smiled and picked them up to find a blue handkerchief tucked inside the ribbon around the stems. She really had thought of everything, and I felt so lucky to have told her the truth and to have her on my side.
During the drive, my father’s presence pretty much kept my thoughts from wandering to needless worry. He took the chance to tell me how pretty I had become and that my younger half-sisters would be very happy to meet me one day. There was enough time for me to hear a little about his life and how he hoped for me to visit his beautiful country.
I nodded, but my body could sense us closing in on the Overlook. Instantly, my dad’s voice became a hum as I tried to remember the vows I’d planned to say. No matter how much I tried to remember them, it was blank in there. All I could hear was the pounding of my heart in my chest.
As we pulled up, I caught a glimpse of Wes standing near the edge of the cliff between a few rows of white chairs. Everything closed itself off at the moment I snuck a peek at him looking so handsome, even from a distance. I smiled as my rehearsed words began to come back to me. After a moment, my father called my name.
“Um, yes,” I answered, forcing myself to turn from the window.
“I brought you something.” Reaching out, he said, “I want you to have it.”
I looked down at a small blue velvet box. “Okay.”
“It belonged to your avó.”