The Honourable Maverick / The Unsung Hero (4 page)

Which was how all this had started, wasn’t it?

He really would have to be more careful next time, he decided with a wry inward smile as he found himself nodding and then being guided to the comfortable armchair rolled into this corner of the PICU.

A nurse took the layers away from the baby. They left her with a nappy and her hat on, an oxygen saturation monitor clipped to a minuscule toe and some unobtrusive sticky dots and soft wires that connected her to a cardiac monitor. She was mostly naked, Max noted with some alarm. Small and pink and awkward-looking, with stick-like arms and legs.

‘Keep her prone and upright,’ the paediatrician advised. ‘The nurses will keep an eye on you both and levels are set for an alarm to go off if the oxygen levels or cardiac rhythm need interventions.’

Max had sacrificed the neck of his T-shirt so that he didn’t need to discard any of his own clothing. The vertical cut allowed him to fold the neckline down so that the baby’s face would be uncovered. He heard the whimper of the baby as she was picked up.

Good grief…he really didn’t want to do this. Was it too late to back out?

An alarm began to sound. A slow bell that pinged
ominously. Maybe the baby didn’t like the idea, either. Her heart rhythm was jumping erratically.

‘Does she need to go back in the crib?’ Max tried not to sound too hopeful.

‘Let’s see how we go for a minute or two.’

With an inward sigh, Max held up the bottom of his old, soft T-shirt while a nurse positioned the baby and then covered her. A layer of the leather jacket came next and then she helped him put his arm in the right place for support. He felt awkward. Uncomfortable.

He could feel the baby wriggle against his chest, moving tiny limbs as if in protest. He could feel the miniature chest heaving as she attempted to breathe and cry at the same time but the effort seemed exhausting and the movements diminished.

Max took a cautious glance downwards and found the baby’s eyes were open. So dark they looked black and they were fixed on him. He took a deep, careful breath and let it out very slowly.

‘Look at that.’ The paediatrician sounded delighted. ‘Heart rate’s coming up and it’s steady.’

They waited another minute as Max sat as still as humanly possible.

‘Looking good,’ came the expert verdict. ‘We’ll leave you to it, Max.’

‘Ah…’ He watched as staff began to disperse. To stop watching, even, from all over the unit. Any second now and he would be virtually on his own. ‘How long should I stay here?’

‘The longer the better,’ a nurse said cheerfully. ‘As long as you can, anyway.’

Max tipped his head back and closed his eyes. He
breathed. In and out. He could feel the baby breathing. In that first long, quiet minute of being left to himself he could even feel the baby’s heart beating. A soft, rapid ticking against his chest. Almost on top of his own heart.

Weird.

He opened his eyes and tilted his chin so he could look down again.

The baby was still awake. Still watching him with a curiously intent gaze that managed to look utterly bewildered at the same time.

‘Mmm,’ Max murmured sympathetically. ‘I know just how you feel. But don’t worry. We’ll get it all sorted out in no time.’

‘Whoa! What are you
doing?’

‘Oh, man…’

Rick, closely followed by Jet, had come into a now dimly lit PICU to find Max still in the armchair, with a tiny baby nestled on his chest beneath his leather jacket.

‘Shh…don’t wake her up.’

Rick’s eyebrows were sky high. ‘I bumped into Jet as he was coming out of the big people ICU,’ he said in a stage whisper. ‘Thought I’d come and say hi and…’ His grin widened. ‘I’m sure glad I did. Wouldn’t have missed
this
for quids. What
are
you doing?’

‘Being a kangaroo,’ Max muttered. ‘Go away.’

Jet was looking at the monitors. ‘Kid looks stable enough,’ he said. ‘Why don’t you put it back to bed and we’ll go get a coffee or something.’

Max sighed. ‘Because every time I try and put her
down she goes into a bradycardia and the oxygen levels drop.’

The nursing staff hadn’t missed the arrival of Max’s friends. More than one of them was finding a task that necessitated getting a lot closer to this extraordinary scene. Three large men and one very small baby.

‘She loves her daddy,’ the closest one said with a smile directed at Rick.

He smiled back. ‘And who wouldn’t?’

The nurse giggled. Max could swear she even batted her eyelashes at Rick. He sighed again.

‘What’s the story, Jet? How’s Ellie doing?’

‘On dialysis,’ Jet said grimly. ‘Renal function hasn’t picked up yet and there’s still some concern about her lungs. They’re going to keep her sedated and on the ventilator, at least overnight.’

‘Prognosis?’

Jet shrugged. ‘She’s hanging in there. Could go either way.’

Max swallowed. What was going to happen to this baby if Ellie didn’t make it? He should be worried that he’d put his hand up as her only available relative but, instead, he found himself more worried about what life might have in store for this tiny girl.

Rick was leaning closer. ‘Kinda cute, isn’t it?’ He was grinning again. ‘You know, I think I can see the family likeness.’

Jet snorted. He took a glance over his shoulder as if his scowl might be enough to ensure that the staff minded their own business for a while.

‘How long are you going to keep this up, Max?’

Max said nothing. He was quite used to the feel of
the baby against him now. In fact, at some point during the last couple of hours he’d experienced an odd sense of relief when the contact was re-established and things had settled down again. He wasn’t going to make another attempt to put the baby back in her plastic crib any time soon. Maybe it wouldn’t feel right until he knew whether or not her mother was going to survive.

Rick’s smile had finally faded. ‘Jet told me what happened in ED.’ His mouth quirked again briefly. ‘And if he hadn’t told me, I would have found out pretty damn quick. The whole hospital is buzzing with the news of your sudden fatherhood, mate.’

‘I’ll bet.’

‘I mean, it was one thing to tell the weasel you were the father so that he’d go away but…’ Rick sucked in a long breath, an eloquent sound that encompassed the depth of the trouble Max had got himself into here.

‘The guy raped her,’ Max said quietly.

There was a moment’s silence. Max could feel an echo of his own reaction to that information. The way it changed things. The anger on Ellie’s behalf. On behalf of all women, really. They all liked women. A lot. He could sense the way his friends stilled. He saw Jet’s hands curl into fists.

‘And then he got her fired,’ he added. ‘When she tried to get away from him. He’s been stalking her ever since.’ He cleared his throat. ‘And I told her she was safe.’

Another moment of silence as Rick and Jet absorbed and then accepted the implications.

‘She won’t be safe until she’s well enough to look after this baby and get away.’

‘She’ll never be safe.’ Rick’s eyes were narrowed. ‘The
bastard.’

‘Anyway…’ Max didn’t want to consider the future right now. The present was more than enough to deal with. Especially given that the baby was stirring. Woken by the intense conversation around it, perhaps. Or maybe it could sense the tension in the body it rested against.

The whimper became a warbling cry that made both Rick and Jet shift their feet uncomfortably. It also brought a nurse, who was carrying a bottle.

‘Looks like it’s dinnertime,’ she said. ‘Here you go, Daddy.’ She handed Max the bottle.

‘Maybe you better do this,’ he muttered.

The baby’s cry strengthened. Jet’s pager sounded and he reached for it to read the message with obvious relief as Max fumbled with the bottle, trying to fit the teat into the tiny mouth.

‘Gotta go,’ Jet said. ‘Sorry, mate. I’ll get back later.’

‘I’ll come with you,’ Rick said. Clearly this experience was rapidly losing its entertainment value.

Jet slanted a backward glance at Max. ‘You want me to arrange cover for your ED shift tomorrow?’

The baby’s mouth had finally closed over the teat and she was trying to suck. Max tilted the bottle to help. The baby sucked harder, her dark gaze fixed on the man who didn’t seem to know what he was doing. But then she tasted the milk and the sucking settled into a rhythm.

‘Max?’ Jet prompted.

‘Yeah…cover would be good.’ Max couldn’t break the eye contact with the infant so he didn’t even try and look up. ‘I’m not going anywhere for a while.’

S
HE
was lost.

It was dark.
So
dark. And maybe she was in a forest. There was danger. Animals or tree branches that scratched and bit. Things to trip over so that she landed hard enough to hurt herself because there was pain that wouldn’t go away.

And fear.

She was running but so confused she couldn’t tell whether she was running away from something that terrified her or towards something that she wanted so badly it was worth going through this terrible journey.

Weirdly, in spite of the pain and the fear, she felt protected. As though something…no, someone…was watching over her. A guardian angel but one so dark it was invisible. She thought she could detect a ripple in the inky shadows at times but then it would vanish, often under the onslaught of new pain, and then she would be in the dark again. Utterly forlorn.

Time was irrelevant. She had been in this place for ever so when it changed and light began to filter in, the new development was even more confusing. Scary.

‘Ellie? Can you hear me?’

Yes…but she had no idea who this voice belonged to. She’d heard it before, she knew that much. And she liked it. She liked it very much because it made her feel…safe.

Talk some more, she begged silently. I want to feel your voice.

No…shouldn’t that be hear? Except she
could
feel it. It wrapped around her like the softest blanket to keep her warm and yet it had a rough edge that rumbled its way through her ears and brain and into every part of her body. Through places that hurt and somehow it softened the pain so that it became no more than a background ache. Unimportant. The voice went right into her bones.

‘Can you open your eyes?’ it asked.

Ellie tried but they felt glued shut. Her eyelids were made of something so heavy it was impossible for tiny muscles to lift them. She could feel something, though. An encouraging kind of flutter.

‘Wake up, Ellie.’ The voice was also encouraging. ‘There’s someone here who would love to meet you properly.’

She tried again. Tried really hard because the owner of the voice wanted her to and that made it important to succeed. So important that nothing else mattered for the moment and even the ache deep within was forgotten. And slowly she achieved her goal. Her eyes were open and it was bright. Too bright. Her eyes stung and all she could see was a blur.

A very large, dark blur that reminded her fleetingly of the nasty place she’d been in for ever. The flash of
memory was disturbing but the remnant of fear was gone just as quickly, leaving something oddly pleasant in its wake. This blur was like the shadow of that guardian angel. The one she’d tried so hard to catch sight of properly but which had always been just out of reach. Evaporating into the darkness.

The dreamlike wisp evaporated as well as Ellie blinked, adjusting to the light and letting the face swimming above hers come into focus.

Dark hair. Waves that were almost curls with small ends here and there that refused to behave and created a roguish frame for a face that had very definite lines and a jaw that was dark and rough and hadn’t seen a razor for several days.

Dark eyes that were watching her very intently and a mouth that was tilting into a soft smile. The most beautiful smile Ellie had ever seen in her life.

‘Hi, there,’ the voice said. ‘How’re you doing?’

Ellie’s lips felt stiff, as though they hadn’t been used in quite a while. She tried to say something but her throat hurt and the only sound that emerged was a rusty squeak. She swallowed carefully and blinked again. Cautiously but very quickly in the end, just in case this was a dream and the man with the beautiful smile would vanish if she closed her eyelids for too long.

Her head was swirling with incomplete images and thoughts. She knew she was in a bed. In a hospital because she knew that familiar smell so well and there were equally recognisable sounds like the soft beeping of pagers and monitoring equipment. She could see the sharp edges of that equipment in her peripheral vision
and she could hear echoes of voices that had long since stopped speaking. Urgent voices. Saying things like
‘massive haemorrhage’
and
‘Trauma One’
and ‘
blood group and cross-match. Stat’.

Paralysed by the kaleidoscope happening inside her head, Ellie focused on those intent dark eyes above her.

‘You’re in the intensive care unit,’ the voice said calmly. ‘You’ve been pretty sick for a couple of days but you’re going to be all right. You’re off the ventilator now and your lungs are doing well. So are your kidneys. How’s your throat? It’s probably a bit sore after having a tube in it for so long.’

There was a frown in those eyes now. He was worried about something.
Her?
That was nice. Ellie liked that she was important enough for him to be worried about her. Maybe he’d smile at her again.

‘I’m Max—remember? You came to the apartment to find Sarah but she wasn’t there. And then you got into trouble. You went into labour and—’

Ellie could feel her eyes widening. Her skin was prickling as though the blanket the voice had provided was being stripped off, leaving her exposed to the elements. The sense of safety was gone, too. She could feel the fear of that awful forest place crowding around her. Something was happening in her brain. An almost painful series of jolts as pieces fell into place.

Sarah. Marcus. Her
baby…

‘She’s fine,’ Max said softly. ‘See?’

His head tilted and Ellie’s gaze followed the downward trajectory of his. Down his body to where his arms were cradling something. She couldn’t see what
it was until Max tipped forward and there, nestled in blankets, was a tiny face. A sleeping, newborn baby.

‘
Oh
…’ The sound forced its way past her sore, dry throat. ‘Is that…?’

She knew it was. She could
feel
it but she needed to be told as well. To make sure she wasn’t dreaming.

‘Sure is,’ Max said. ‘This is your daughter, Ellie. Would you like to hold her?’

Ellie nodded. She couldn’t say anything because her already tight throat was now entirely choked by tears. She could feel them rolling down her face as Max carefully placed the baby on her chest and then helped her move her arms to cradle the infant. He pushed IV tubing attached to her arm to one side and then he looked up, past Ellie.

‘Could you grab an extra pillow or two?’ he asked someone. ‘Let’s try and prop Ellie up a bit more.’

Her arms felt so weak Ellie was frightened she’d let go but Max seemed to understand because he kept his hands on top, supporting her. A nurse came and tucked another pillow beneath her shoulders and an extra one under her head. A rush of dizziness faded and Ellie found she could blink her tears away and actually see her baby properly for the first time.

Her eyes were still closed, a fan of dark lashes sitting on each cheek like butterflies. A tiny button of a nose and a mouth pursed into a perfect cupid’s bow.

‘Isn’t she beautiful?’

There was a note of wonder in his voice and something more. Something that was enough to make Ellie lift her gaze for an instant but Max was intent on the
tiny face in her arms and he didn’t look up so she couldn’t get any clue to that confusing undertone.

She didn’t have the energy to try and understand. Didn’t even have the inclination to try because there was something far more important to think about. Something so wonderful that really it was no surprise that Max seemed to share what she couldn’t begin to put into words.

This was her baby.

Her daughter. It was a
girl
and she was—

‘Is she—?’ Ellie’s voice caught. Suddenly, she was too scared to ask.

‘She’s perfect.’ Max sounded…good grief…
proud?
‘Ten little fingers, ten little toes. She’s feeding well. Fifty grams up on two days ago.’

‘What…?’
Again, this was disturbing enough to make her stop feasting her eyes on the perfect features of her baby. ‘My God…how long…?’

‘Have you been in here?’ Max looked up this time and there was sympathy in his eyes as he completed her horrified question. ‘Three days, Ellie. This little button was born at seven minutes past six on Sunday.’

It was too much to take in. Ellie could have accepted feeling like this if she’d been coming round from, say, a general anaesthetic for an emergency Caesarean but her precious baby had been in the world for three whole days without her mother’s knowledge, let alone her care and protection.

Panic was edging closer and Ellie found she was struggling to take a breath. She had to take in enough air to warn Max. To demand that they let her out of this bed so that she could be with her baby and take care
of her. Or at least for them to bring the baby in here so that she could watch over her. Every second of every hour.

‘Ellie.’

The tone was firm enough for her to realise this wasn’t the first time he’d said her name.
‘Listen
to me.’

The words were a command but were delivered in what was virtually a whisper. What Max was about to say was imperative.

And private.

Gulping like a stranded fish, Ellie blinked frightened tears into submission and fixed her gaze on Max. He took a quick look around them and then back at her.

‘Remember how I told Marcus I was the baby’s father and it made him go away?’

Ellie managed a nod.

‘Well, I told them that here too and everyone believes it.’

That’s what it had been, Ellie realised. That odd note in his voice. The way he’d been holding this tiny baby. He had looked and sounded for all the world like a besotted new father.

So he had been acting? To protect them?

Ellie blinked again, this time in bewilderment. He was either an incredibly good actor or her brain wasn’t functioning at anywhere near normal levels of acuity. No, it had to be acting if everyone else believed it as well.

‘There’s more.’ Max leaned closer. He could have been admiring the baby and he even used the tip of his
middle finger to stroke the infant’s cheek gently but his intention seemed to have been to put his mouth close enough to Ellie’s ear to ensure that no one overheard.

‘I didn’t give them your real name,’ he told her. ‘And…um…I wasn’t thinking too straight at the time so I told them…’

He sounded almost embarrassed, Ellie thought. What kind of weird name had he come up with?

‘I told them that your surname was McAdam.’

Nothing wrong with that, Ellie decided with relief. It was a perfectly nice name.

‘OK,’ she whispered.

There was a moment’s silence. Ellie could feel how still Max was. So still she was only aware of the tiny movements in her arms as her baby breathed and stirred slightly in slumber. She was used to the feel of those tiny limbs moving. It was like she’d lost part of herself but had found it again only now the movements were on the outside, instead of safely enclosed in her womb.

Max was still quiet. He seemed to be waiting for something. A breath audible enough to be a sigh escaped his lips.

‘That’s
my
name, Ellie.’

‘Oh…’ Well, that was OK, too. She didn’t mind borrowing his name for a little while. As long as he didn’t mind. But maybe he did. The continued silence was starting to feel uncomfortable.

‘I…ah…told them we were married,’ Max said, so softly Ellie was sure she hadn’t heard correctly.

She could remember what had happened at the apartment. That he’d claimed he was the baby’s father
and that he and his fellow dark angels had made sure Marcus had gone away and that she was safe.

And he’d obviously kept up the charade in order to keep protecting her when she had been totally helpless, presumably in the emergency department of whatever this hospital was. He’d even gone an extra mile in giving her a new name so Marcus wouldn’t be alerted to where she now was. Not just any name, either. He’d loaned her his own, along with the additional protection of allowing people to think she was his wife.

His wife.

Ellie took another look at this extraordinary man. He was a hero, no doubt about that. Maybe he wasn’t wearing his motorbike leathers right now and he looked tired and unshaven but he was still absolutely gorgeous. And he was capable of bestowing the most beautiful smiles in the world.

The woman who would be his real wife one day was the luckiest woman in the world. She just didn’t know it yet.

Gratitude for all that he’d done for her was filling Ellie’s heart. Competing—no, meshing with the overwhelming love she already had for the tiny person she still held in her arms. It was all too much and it seemed to be getting hard to breathe again. So hard, it was utterly exhausting.

A pinging sound came from somewhere above her head and then there was the sound of footsteps approaching rapidly.

‘Oxygen saturation level’s way down,’ a nurse observed. The alarm was silenced.

‘Hardly surprising. First time she’s been awake and it’s been an emotional reunion for these two.’

‘Of course it has. But I need to put some oxygen on and she needs to rest. I think you’ll have to take baby back to the PICU, Dr McAdam.’

‘No.’
The word was ripped out of Ellie in a gasp.

‘Just for a while, Ellie.’ Max’s hands were moving under her arms already, preparing to lift the precious bundle. He was still bent over her. ‘She’s being taken good care of, I promise.’ His mouth was so close Ellie could see every nuance of the words being made. ‘She’s safe, Ellie. Believe it and rest. We both want you to rest and get better.’

‘Of course you do.’ The nurse had a smile in her voice. ‘Don’t worry. I’ll take good care of Mrs McAdam for you.’

Mrs McAdam?

This
was
a dream. Or maybe a nightmare, Ellie decided as Max took her daughter from her arms. But then he leaned in and kissed her. Softly, on her lips, and Ellie found her eyes drifting shut. This was most definitely a dream.

‘Sleep well, darling,’ he said clearly. ‘I’ll be back very soon.’

This time when Ellie woke her eyes snapped open and focused instantly. The wave of disappointment at finding the space beside her bed empty was enough to make her cry out.