Authors: K.A. Sterritt
“I’ll have the ni– actually, you know what? I’ll have the burger. Just call me crazy.”
“Seriously?” Jason threw his arms in the air. “Thank God.” He grabbed me by the shoulder and tried to keep a straight face. “It’s pained me to watch you miss out on Darren’s burgery goodness for this long.”
I struggled to stop myself laughing. “I’m pretty sure ‘burgery’ isn’t a word.”
“It’s totally a word. Wait ’til you try it. The only question you’ll have is why you wasted so much time with beans and cat food.”
Dropping his hands, Jason turned to Darren, who was grinning broadly.
“Hey, don’t knock the niçoise,” I interjected. “It’s the best of the salads.”
Inane as our chat might have been, it felt really good to switch off and enjoy some banter before the big presentation. Jason was my comfort zone and I loved him for it.
Having inhaled his burger in record time, he wiped his mouth then clapped his hands together. “Alright. It’s nearly go time, superstar.”
Mum used to call me superstar. Shit.
“I don’t think I can do this, Jase.” I rubbed my forehead, perhaps in an attempt to force out my negative thoughts. “I’m fine one second and then feel like I’m going to hyperventilate the next. I met a guy here this morning when I was getting coffee and he said I looked sad. I nearly cried in front of him.”
Jason grimaced slightly but didn’t interrupt.
“I almost bit Eva’s head off back in the office and if anyone says anything that triggers a memory, I’ll blow it. I know I will.” A lump was forming in the back of my throat as I continued. “You know how hard this day is for me. It’s just better if I’m away from people.”
Jason pulled his chair across and put his arm around me. “You’re going to be fine.” He squeezed my shoulder reassuringly. “You’re going to be more than fine. You go in there and show Mr Davenport why you are the greatest thing to hit the Australian architecture world since the legendary Anna Wilson.”
I flinched at her name.
Jason must have felt my body tense. He pulled me around to face him and held both my arms. “You go in there and show Eva ‘Bitch’ McCormack why she will always be runner up. But more importantly, you go in there and focus on the good memories of your mum.”
I swallowed the lump in my throat, but my eyes still blurred as Jason continued.
“From what you’ve told me, she was strong and smart – just like you. Do this for yourself and for her. Tonight, we’ll get really drunk.”
“Thank you. I seem to be saying that to you a lot today.”
“Just own this, Holly. Don’t let today’s date ruin it for you. Tonight we’ll celebrate.”
We returned to the office in comfortable silence. I needed to get a hold of myself. Jason was right, I needed to own this. But first, I needed to freshen up, so I made a quick trip to the bathroom. Touching up my makeup in the mirror, I made a conscious effort to ignore the sadness my eyes refused to hide. My hair was being very well-behaved so I made a quick decision to pull the elastic band out, allowing it to fall loose down my back. I could hear Audrey’s voice in my head, reminding me to take advantage of my natural assets. I reapplied my pink lip gloss, pinched my cheeks for a bit of extra colour, stood up straight and pushed my shoulders back.
I was ready to face off.
Mr Slater appeared at the conference room door accompanied by the three Davenport representatives. One by one they filed into the room. As Slater began the introductions, I couldn’t believe my eyes.
“Ryan Davenport, Michelle Cartwright and Piers Holloway, I’d like you to meet two members of the Slater Jenkins team. This is Eva McCormack and Holly Ashton.”
What? No, no, no, no! This is not happening!
Ryan from the cafe was none other than CEO Mr Ryan Davenport, and he was standing right in front of me. I sucked in a loud breath as he shook my hand for a few seconds too long, piercing me with those eyes. I was stuttering when I managed to croak out my greetings. My eyes darted around the room, trying to work out if anyone had noticed my unprofessional demeanour. My brain was having a hard time catching up. When I dragged my eyes back to his, Ryan seemed calm and collected. He was a professional and I was a silly girl, overreacting.
Once everyone else was seated, Mr Slater walked to the head of the table.
“Welcome,” he began. “Firstly, thank you for choosing Slater Jenkins for this exciting project. I think you’ll be really impressed with Holly and Eva’s individual visions for your building.”
Before Mr Slater could continue, Ryan interrupted him. “Ladies, before you present your designs, I’d like a brief idea of your background and a sense of your architectural style.”
This was the last thing I needed. Talking about my past would take my brain places I needed to avoid today.
Own it, Holly. Breathe in, breathe out.
Eva stood immediately, clearly thrilled by the opportunity to talk about herself. I didn’t mind. It gave me some extra time to compose myself.
“Thank you, Mr Davenport,” Eva purred. She then proceeded to gloat about her exemplary academic record and various university accolades. She also felt it necessary to point out that she’d chosen architecture over a career in acting, like her father. Her father being the famous Marcus McCormack. Of course, the crazy bitch also managed to work that in. She was beyond reproach. During her speech and as she presented her design, I stole a few glances at Ryan. He was completely fixated on Eva. I had to admit she was impressive, and her talent was undeniable. Taking her seat, she looked directly at me and mouthed the words “in the bag”.
She was going down.
“Okay, now we’ll hear from Holly,” Slater said, still smiling at Eva.
I stood up and pushed my shoulders back. Flicking my hair over my shoulder for good measure, I took a deep breath. Then, as if I had no choice, I made eye contact with Ryan. The way he was looking at me made my face flush. I felt the heat rise up my neck like an impending tsunami of panic. Perhaps sensing my distress, Ryan cleared his throat and asked me what the inspiration had been for my design. His calm, sexy voice settled my nerves and I momentarily forgot my raging emotions. I also forgot about the other people in the room.
“My mother was my inspiration, actually.”
“Really? Tell me about that.” He seemed genuinely interested, giving me the confidence to continue.
“She’s the reason I pursued architecture. She showed me how to look at things in ways I never would have done before.”
“And what ways would they be?” Ryan asked.
“She taught me to look at things from every angle, not just the obvious ones.”
Ryan’s warm smile urged me to continue.
“Lie down on the footpath and look directly up at the building next to you. Do a handstand against a tree in the park and look back at the city skyline.” The memories came freely. “Take a boat to the middle of the lake then jump overboard. How does everything look when you first resurface?”
Ryan leant forward on the table, just as he’d done in the café earlier. My confidence grew.
“Whenever we were admiring a building,” I continued. “Mum would ask me to tell her the thing I liked most about it. The first couple of times, I said the obvious things, like the colour of the bricks or the sandstone footings
.
But Mum wanted me to look for the less obvious things, the things I really
loved
. When I was studying your apartment building, I visited the site both during the day and at night. I watched the way the light refracted off the water and transformed its appearance. The water became the most important factor in my redesign concept.”
I rambled on about my ideas and aspirations for sustainable living. It was all just a bit of a blur. Barely drawing breath, I eventually ran out of steam and the room came back into focus. That’s when I noticed the shocked look on Slater’s face, and the smug grin on Eva’s.
I sat down wondering what the hell I had just said. It definitely wasn’t what I’d rehearsed earlier.
As Slater discussed some of the more technical issues, I could feel tears welling in my eyes. Staring at Slater, I barely heard a word he said. I was just willing him to stop talking so I could get the hell out of there. I had never gone rogue by allowing my personal life to affect my work before. I refused to look at Ryan.
“I’m afraid that’s all we’ve got time for,” Ryan said. “I’ve got another meeting across town, but thank you so much for your time. I have your business cards.” He handed Eva and I his card.
Our fingers touched briefly as I took the card. When I looked up, my eyes met his. I felt a heady combination of excitement, confusion and vulnerability. I had no idea what he was feeling, but neither of us smiled.
I was officially mortified. Had I really told them that I did handstands in the park?
Ugh.
Slater saw them out and was in meetings for the rest of the day. I had no opportunity to apologise or attempt to explain. What could I say, anyway?
After two quick glasses of wine and one slow one, my embarrassment was starting to feel more like a fuzzy memory. Slater had suggested we take the Davenport representatives out for drinks after work. Michelle and Piers accepted the invitation and agreed to meet us at the bar around six. Ryan said he would do his best to come despite his jetlag and back-to-back meetings.
“I’m sure it wasn’t as bad as you think,” Jason said, putting his arm around me.
“It really was,” said Eva, laughing derisively. “Can you do a handstand for us now, Holly? You were very entertaining.”
“Shut up, Eva,” Jason warned. “You’d better pull your head in when the clients arrive.”
“Don’t worry about me, pretty boy. I plan to be Mr Davenport’s sole focus. I won’t be wasting my time talking about your buddy and her emotional baggage.” Her sly smile made me want to smack her in the face. Fortunately, she sauntered off towards the bar before I could act on the impulse.
“Seriously, Holly,” Jason said. “You need to cut yourself some slack.” He picked up his beer and took a long swig. “I feel terrible for dragging you in today. Perhaps I should have let you have your day.”
“You think?”
“God, Holly, I really thought I was doing the right thing.”
Before I had a chance to respond, Slater, Michelle and Piers joined us. Apparently Ryan was tied up in a meeting and would be joining us later. Eva cornered Piers, and I couldn’t help smirking at her blatant flirtation. We spent the next couple of hours making small talk and drinking. I was actually having a pretty good time, thanks to the welcome buzz of the wine. The group grew larger as other colleagues joined us. When I glanced at my watch, it was almost ten o’clock and the bar was packed and noisy. I was well beyond tipsy and really should have been heading home.
I pushed through the crowded bar, heading for the bathroom. As I passed a group of suited men, a hand grabbed my arm, jerking me to a stop. Annoyed, I looked up into a set of drunken, bloodshot eyes.
“Hey, let me go,” I said, trying to pull away. Drunken suits didn’t scare me, but his beer breath was disgusting, and I wasn’t in the mood for this all too familiar routine. It was going to end with my knee in his balls.
“Do you know why they call this bar the Dry Cleaner?” he slurred.
“Err, no. Can you please let me go now?” I was increasingly concerned by his tight grip. He was hurting my arm.
“’Cause it’s where you go to pick up a suit.” His mates laughed at his dismal attempt at humour. He tried to pull me in closer.
“Let her go,” a stern voice commanded from behind me. “She’s with me.”
He dropped my arm like it was on fire and I turned, bumping into Ryan’s imposing frame. Taking my hand, he guided me away from the drunken suit and into the hallway leading to the bathrooms.
“Are you okay?” His furrowed brow and darkened eyes looked concerned and angry.
“You are abnormally good looking.”
Holy shit, did I just say that out loud? Definitely too much wine…
Ryan grinned and took a step closer. “I like your hair down,” he whispered into my ear. “It was a little distracting during your presentation.”
Although I was paralysed by his closeness, his comment shocked me back to reality. I thought about my mortifying speech in the boardroom, and cringed.
“I need to use the bathroom, but you’ll find everyone over there.” Moving aside, I gestured towards the bar.
Leaning forward, he closed the small distance between us. “What’s wrong, Holly?”
“You didn’t have to save me from that guy. I can take care of myself. I take self-defence classes, you know. He would have gotten a knee in the balls if he hadn’t let me go soon.”
“I actually believe you,” he said, laughing. “I had a feeling we’d meet again.”
“Oh God, are you one of those hippy kismet types who believes in serendipity and the universe telling you things?”
“No. I just know what I want, that’s all. It’s what compelled me to approach you in the café.”
“I thought it was the lack of other seating options?”
“You have a smart mouth, Ms Ashton.”
I couldn’t help looking at his perfect lips, which were now extremely close to mine. My breath hitched. My heart rate increased and my breathing slowed with every second.
“I really want to kiss you.”
I immediately knew I would let him. Was I out of my mind? If Slater found out I was fraternising with such an important client, he would fire me. No man was worth that risk. But there was something about
this
man. He made it difficult to think clearly. There was only room for one thought.
“I want you to kiss me.” It felt like the truest sentence I’d ever spoken.
Ryan pressed his lips against mine, kissing me with an intensity I responded to immediately. I found myself pouring all the pent up emotion of my day into kissing him back. A small groan sounded from the back of his throat as he pulled my hips closer to his, deepening the kiss. I looped my arms around his neck and ran my hands through his hair. This was by the far the best kiss I’d ever experienced. The electricity between us was almost unbearable.
When we eventually came up for air, I was immediately flooded with shock at what I’d done. What
we’d
done. I pushed him away and brought my fingers to my lips, trying to ignore the tingling sensation long enough to order my thoughts.