The Gentle Wind's Caress (33 page)

Startled at her outburst, Ethan paused and glanced up at her. In an instant, Farrell seized his moment and with one fluid movement he reached down to his boots and pulled out a knife. He plunged it into Ethan’s chest and jerked it up under his ribs as clean as a butcher boning a carcass

An anguished cry escaped Ethan as his eyes widened in surprise, he frowned and then a look of utter pain creased his face. Then he was falling, toppling backwards, away from Farrell and his bloodied hand.

Isabelle’s world spun, whirled off its axis. Horror of a magnitude she had never imagined had her swaying, gasping. She broke free from Hughie. Stumbling, her heart thumped as though it would burst from her body. She crumpled to her knees bedside Ethan, who lay holding his stomach and frowning as if in puzzlement as to what had happened to him. He groaned and she lifted his head and placed it gently on her lap.

Behind them she was aware of running, shouting, the sound of a gun going off and screaming, but it drifted into a muffle as she concentrated on Ethan’s toffee eyes. ‘I’m here, my love.’ She kissed him softly on the lips. ‘You’ll be fine, I promise.’ She kissed his forehead and brushed his hair back. ‘We’ll get help.’

His gaze wandered beyond her to the sky. ‘My…Isabelle…’

‘Yes, my love.’ She kissed him again. ‘Lie still, darling.’

‘I cannot…see you…’ Panic heightened his voice.

Isabelle bit her lip to stop from crying. ‘I’m holding you sweetheart. You’re in my arms.’

‘Good.’ His eyelids fluttered and closed.

‘Ethan!’ She shook him. ‘Look at me.’

He groaned and a trickle of blood seeped from the corner of his mouth.

She clutched him to her. ‘Stay with me.’ Her tears dropped onto his hair. ‘Don’t leave me,’ she whispered.

‘Belle?’ Hughie’s voice came from a long way away.

She stared up, trying to focus. So many people circled her and Ethan. Faces blurred and she dismissed them all. Bent over Ethan she cupped his cheek in her hand and silently begged for him not to leave her.

His eyes opened and he looked right at her. ‘You and me. We stole…a piece…of…heaven…didn’t we?’

Isabelle nodded, her throat tight with emotion. ‘Yes, sweetheart, we did.’

Pain made him grimace and she held him closer. Kissing his forehead while stroking his hair with one hand, she whispered her words of love to him until he could no longer hear them. ‘Yes, we stole a piece of heaven…’

Epilogue

Spring blossom, all delicate and soft, floated on the tender breeze to land reverently in fragile clouds on the lush grass. Nature’s own perfume saturated the air and was made more intense by the warmth of the May day. Bees buzzed from flower to flower and apart from bird song it was one of the few sounds.

The baby, trying her best to stand from where she sat on the white woollen blanket, gurgled in contentment. From somewhere beyond the small wood, a cow bellowed once, then twice.

‘Isabelle!’ Elizabeth called from the top of the slight rise leading up from the back of the house.

Sighing at the loss of her peace, Isabelle straightened on the bench seat and awaited Elizabeth’s arrival. The soft swish of skirts brushing the long grass indicated when she was near and Isabelle turned, summoning a welcoming smile.

‘I’ve come to spend a few minutes with you before Mrs Kirkland calls.’ Elizabeth smiled and glanced at her before quickly swooping down to gather up the baby. ‘Here’s my darling angel.’ She kissed the baby’s plump cheeks and tickled her tummy.

Watching, Isabelle couldn’t help offering up a silent prayer of thanks that Elizabeth loved her granddaughter. In the aftermath of that terrible January day last year, Elizabeth could have easily shunned her, but she hadn’t. In fact she had gone to extreme limits to make sure she was a part of her and the baby’s life. She’d taken Isabelle and the boys into her home and begged them to live there with her at the Hall. She’d supported Isabelle throughout the pregnancy and birth.

Settling down on the seat beside Isabelle, Elizabeth nestled the drowsy baby against her shoulder. ‘Isn’t it a beautiful day?’

‘Yes.’

‘I never thought I would say that again.’ Elizabeth rubbed her cheek along the top of the baby’s head. ‘I thought I would never experience a good day again.’

Isabelle plucked at her black skirts. Whenever conversation alluded to Ethan or his death she felt as though a weight pressed against her chest. She glanced up when Elizabeth took her hand and held it.

They sat for some time in silence. Alone with their thoughts, their memories, their grief.

After a while, Isabelle could breath easier, the pain of losing Ethan sometimes threatened to choke the life from her, but some days were better than others. The trial was over and the newspapers had stopped hounding them for information. The first anniversary of Ethan’s death had been endured, and now summer was nearly here and she could rest. She could forget. Not Ethan of course, she could never forget him, for she saw him everyday in their daughter’s toffee eyes, but the horror of that tragic day wasn’t as sharp as it was. The constant nightmares, the uncontrollable grief had lessened once Bethan was born.

Turning, Isabelle lightly touched her daughter, Bethan Elizabeth. Her arrival softened the anguish, the hurt, the ache of Ethan’s death. She brought smiles to the house and love back into her grandmother’s heart. Isabelle adored her to such an extent that it frightened her. If anything happened to her baby, her and Ethan’s baby, she knew she would leave this world also.

Elizabeth shifted on the seat, adjusting Bethan’s sleeping form. ‘Hamish will be here soon.’

‘Yes.’

‘I shall miss him. He has always been like a son to me…’

‘Yes.’ Isabelle glanced away to the left over the lake and to the deer park on the other side.

Hamish. Poor Hamish. How he has suffered. He witnessed his best friend being murdered and then shot the murderer. His trail had run only days after the inquest into Ethan’s death and though he’d been found not guilty of murdering Farrell, the strain had taken its effect. The verdict of self-defence freed him, but his mind still held him prisoner. And today, he was finally leaving them to sail to Australia. She knew he ached to return to that strange country on the other side of the world and leave behind the disastrous events that altered his life. He’d stayed too long in England and wanted to go home. Isabelle envied him. For though she lived at the Hall, it was no home to her. Hamish knew of a contentment that eluded her.

She’d seen him often in the seventeen months since the accident, and, despite his initial aloofness, they soon created a tentative friendship. His quiet presence whenever he called soothed her agony. He’d become close to the boys, helping them through another difficult period and she was so very grateful for that.

‘I’m jealous of him seeing Rachel again.’ Elizabeth sighed. ‘I miss her so much. We all should have listened to her when Ethan and his father first mooted the idea of Clarice becoming a part of this family. Rachel was against it. She said Clarice wasn’t enough for Ethan, but we wouldn’t listen. All we cared about was the money she brought with her. Money that refurbished the house and restocked the fields with crops and animals.’

‘We can have no regrets, Elizabeth.’ Isabelle spoke without hesitation. She regretted nothing, except that Farrell managed to steal Ethan from her. ‘Fate deals with us how it wishes, we cannot fight it.’

‘I guess you are right.’ Elizabeth patted Bethan’s back. ‘I have to be grateful for Bethan. Oh, I know I shouldn’t be. I should have nothing to do with my son’s illegitimate child, but…’ Tears formed in her eyes. ‘I love her so. If I cannot have Ethan then his daughter is a wonderful gift that I will treasure even if it does offend some of my friends.’

Isabelle raised her chin, hating the gossip about her and Bethan, hating people who judged her tiny daughter. ‘Bethan is indeed a gift. If others want to reject us, then let them. I care not.’

Elizabeth nodded and smiled through her tears. ‘We have each other, we need no one else.’

‘Yes...’

‘But of course we cannot forget the boys.’ She chuckled. ‘The house hasn’t been so full in years.’

‘They adore being here. Hughie shadows the estate manager’s every move, the poor man.’ Isabelle smiled. ‘Saying thank you feels so inadequate for all that you’ve done for my family.’

‘Well, I couldn’t turn my back on the woman Ethan loved more than anything else in the world. He loved you even more than this estate, which I never thought possible. I couldn’t ignore that. In my heart I knew I had to do what was right by him.’ Elizabeth gazed at her. ‘Besides, I have gained much more than I ever expected.’

‘This is a lovely picture.’ Hamish called out to them as he walked closer. ‘A beautiful grandmother, a delightful mother and the sweetest baby.’

They both turned and smiled in greeting. Elizabeth held out her free hand and Hamish lavishly swept off his wide-brimmed hat, bent over and kissed it.

Isabelle sat straighter. ‘Welcome back, Hamish.’

The smile he gave her was a little awkward and he returned his attentions to Elizabeth. ‘Sweetest, Elizabeth, as I arrived another carriage was coming down the drive. I assisted a most charming lady out of it.’ He flashed a rakish grin.

Isabelle frowned. She knew he was play-acting, but still it surprised her that he found another woman charming. Giving herself a mental shake she glanced away to watch a butterfly hover near the blanket. Why wouldn’t Hamish be attracted to someone? He was a single man in the prime of his life. It’s only natural he’d want a wife, a family…

Elizabeth sat forward. ‘Lord, it’ll be Mrs Kirkland. Are you coming in, Isabelle?’

‘No. Not yet. You know I’m not… easy in company.’

‘All right, my dear.’ Elizabeth carefully handed Bethan to Isabelle and then squeezed her shoulder. ‘I’ll not encourage her to stay long and then we’ll have some afternoon tea on the terrace.’

Nodding, Isabelle smiled her thanks and Elizabeth left them.

Hamish raised his eyebrows. ‘May I sit with you?’

‘Of course.’ She tucked Bethan more securely in her arms and gazed down at her.

‘She’s beautiful.’ He touched Bethan’s hand where it curled against Isabelle’s breast.

‘Yes...’ Isabelle stared at Hamish’s large, tanned hand so near to her.

As if sensing her discomfort, he straightened and crossing his legs at the ankle he stared over into the wood. ‘I settled Clarice in a good house. She’s near shops, the library and everything she needs.’

Isabelle swallowed, remembering her first sight of Clarice, obese and gasping for breath as she lumbered down the staircase. Ethan’s wife had greeted her with warmth and shyness that morning, the morning of his funeral.

‘Will she be happy there?’

Hamish nodded. ‘She seemed content the moment she walked into the house and met the cook and housemaid. Everything was as she wanted.’

‘Good. Ethan would approve.’

‘Yes. It was what he planned for her when she originally requested to leave. She is now free to do as she pleases.’

‘Just as I am…’ Isabelle sighed. Yes, she was free from Farrell but her future was very dim indeed. She had no money and three dependants. She lived by Elizabeth’s goodwill.

‘Will you stay with Elizabeth?’

She shrugged one shoulder. ‘I’m not sure. I feel like I’m taking advantage of her. We all live here at her expense. The boys-’

‘Ethan would want it this way.’ His blue eyes became tender.

‘What of you, Hamish? Are you to return to Australia and never come back to England?’

He sighed and it sounded sad. ‘Want I want is impossible to have.’

‘Oh?’

He bent down and snapped off a blade of long grass. He inspected it for a long time and she wondered if he was going to answer her. Finally he threw the stalk away and stood to stare out over the fields. ‘Peace of mind. I would like that back.’

His softly spoken words crushed her. He had killed a man. Because of her, he had shot Farrell and endured a trial that sullied his good name.

‘I am so sorry, Hamish,’ she whispered, tears gathering on her lashes. ‘I am so ashamed I caused you such hardship, such embarrassment and such loss.’

For a moment he said nothing, didn’t even turn around, then carefully, as though weighing up each action, he resumed his seat and faced her. ‘You have nothing to blame yourself for. I didn’t have to involve myself, but I did, mainly because I loved Ethan as a brother and wanted to help him, but also because of you…’ he swallowed, ‘and my feelings for you.’

Her eyes widened and her heart somersaulted in surprise.

Hamish chuckled softly. ‘I have nothing to lose telling you this, as we’ll never met again.’ He took her hand closest to him and kissed it. ‘I fell in love with you the moment I saw you in the garden at Meadow Farm. I’ve fought those feelings since then. I’ve tried to ignore them or at best hide them from everyone else. You were Ethan’s. He loved you and you loved him.’

‘Yes…’ She couldn’t think straight. His honesty stunned her into numbness. ‘I thought you hated me. You used to look at me with coolness…’

‘No, I never hated you. I hated
myself
for wanting you though. I felt I wasn’t being a true friend to Ethan. If I appeared rude at times, it was because I was trying desperately not to show I cared for you. Unfortunately, I wasn’t very good at it.’