Authors: Maggi Myers
“Look at me, Beth, I want to see you,” I drink in his husky voice and lock my eyes on his as he pushes his way into my body and my heart. The veins in his neck bulge with his restraint, his sensuous mouth pulled into a silent “O.” He moves in slow languid strokes, filling me fuller with each thrust of his hips, penetrating all of my defenses with the burn of his stare. I fight wanting to close my eyes in pleasure, needing him to have me stripped bare in every way.
Ryan’s body should be chiseled in marble; from the hard muscles that lay beneath the soft dusting of hair on his chest to the rigid muscles of his abdomen that flex every time his hips meet mine. My tongue draws lazy circles around his pebbled nipples as my nails rake down his chest; a tightening pressure builds from deep inside me, pulling my whole body taut. My muscles clamp down on Ryan as the orgasm crashes over me in waves.
“Ohhh, Beth.” He picks up his rhythm, thrusting into me with fervor. His face is pinched like he is pain, as he slams into me harder, building another wave of desire in me. My nerves, still lit up with pleasure, start to sing when Ryan throws his head back, crying out my name as he buries himself deep inside me one last time.
Chapter 40
The weigh
t of Ryan’s body anchors me
to the bed, keeping me from floating away. I’ve never been so aware of my body or felt as alive as I do laying here with Ryan as we fight to catch our breath. He is still rock hard inside me; I wiggle my hips to make sure I’m not imagining it.
“Have mercy, woman,” he groans into my neck before nipping my skin. “We are never leaving this bed, ever. I don’t care if the damn place burns to the ground around us. Do you hear me?” I giggle as Ryan rocks gently in me.
“Um, should I be concerned?” My cheeks flush as I try to find the words to continue. He looks at me through hooded eyes and tips his mouth the side. Tormentor!
“What do you mean?” He feigns ignorance but slowly starts to thrust inside me again. Cupping my breast in his hand, he darts his tongue around my nipple while watching me through his impossibly long eyelashes. Every coherent thought vanishes from my brain as blood rushes to more key places.
“Did you? How did you?” I stutter.
“God, yes, I’ve never been more turned on in my life.” His breath skitters across my neck. “You do this to me, Beth. No one else.”
This time Ryan takes his time savoring my body with his hands and his mouth, leaving every inch of me thoroughly cherished. When he moves in me, we find a lazy rhythm that drives us over the edge together. The slow burn of his mouth tickles the recesses of my memory; making me remember how I felt the first time he kissed me in the moonlight on my fifteenth birthday. There aren’t many times in life you get the opportunity to come full circle, and I can’t help but feel like life is telling me to grab on this time and never let go.
“What are you thinking about?” Ryan whispers into my hair. I am nestled into the crook of his arm with my head on his chest, feeling like I finally have my shot at happily ever after.
“Us,” I sigh with contentment, “and how good it feels to be here with you.”
“Mmm...so good,” he murmurs. “Can I ask you something?” He strokes his fingers down my back.
“Sure.”
“It’s okay if you don’t want to answer.” His arm tightens around me, like he is afraid I will flee. My heart hammers a nervous beat, waiting.
“You’re scaring me, Ry. Just ask me.”
“What did Tommy do? I know something happened in Miami the summer you came home early because he had to visit a defense attorney a few times when he got back. And then you came back with him and Rob.” He pauses, giving me a chance to respond. Without any doubt, I know that I want to tell Ryan everything. However, I don’t want to tell him tonight. Tommy’s death is the hardest thing either of us has ever been through and his funeral damn near killed us both. I’m not about to add Drew drama to the mix, not after what we just shared so I tell him as much of the truth as I can.
“When Tommy and Uncle Rob came down for The Daytona 500, my parents planned a dinner party with them and a couple of their friends. They weren’t sober back then and the friends they kept weren’t good people. One of my parent’s friends brought cocaine to the house and Tommy lost his mind when he found out. He was furious that they would use in front of me. Anyway, he punched my parent’s friend, and the asshole called the cops. It was a big mess, and I came home with Tommy and Rob so my folks could check into rehab.” I take a deep breath but the knot in my chest is still there.
“Wow. You really had a crazy childhood, didn’t you?” He cradles me against him, tipping my face up to his. He looks at me with adoration. “You amaze me, Beth. You are so strong, so beautiful and full of love. Life could’ve broken you, but you didn’t let it.” Tears spill down my cheeks. I am so head over heels in love with this boy. “Shh...” He runs the pad of his thumb across my tears and kisses me with so much tenderness it breaks my heart. I want to deserve him so badly but until I come clean, I don’t deserve him at all.
“Ryan?” My question carries the tone of my anxiety. Sensing my tension, he rubs a soothing hand down my back.
“Yeah, baby?” His endearment takes root in my soul, fueling my courage.
“I love you. I fell madly that day under the cherry tree.” His heart jumps against my cheek and I continue while I’m still feeling brave, “I never stopped. I didn’t realize how much until you came out of the crowd at the airport...you don’t have to say anything. I just wanted you to know.”
In one swift movement, I am on my back and Ryan’s face is hovering above me. “Say it again, Beth. I’m pretty sure I was just hallucinating.” His eyes twinkle with mischief, easing the thrumming of my heart and pulling my lips into a shy smile.
“I love you, Ryan.” My face flushes at my confession, and I fight the urge to hide my face in my hands. Ryan’s expression turns smug and I cringe at what his response might be.
“Elizabeth,” he starts with a kiss on the tip of my nose, “that’s the best news I’ve had in a long time because I’m so crazy in love with you, it makes me question my sanity.” I pull his face to mine and kiss him with everything I’ve got.
“I don’t know what we’re going to do, but I’m not walking away from you again. Never again, Ry.”
“I wouldn’t let you if you tried, so don’t you worry about that. In fact,” he gives me a devilish grin, “I’d go so far as to say that I would tie you to the bed to keep you from running.”
I swat at his chest, playfully and laugh. For the first time in my life, I’m certain that everything will work out like it’s supposed to. I can’t help but wonder if Tommy somehow has a hand in this and is smiling down on us.
Chapter 41
Light filters through the window, stirring me awake. The first thing I notice is the heaviness draped across my stomach and legs. Careful not to wake him, I peek through one puffy eye at Ryan, who has his arm draped across my waist and his leg thrown over mine. I can’t help the smile that steals across my face. His six-foot frame is crammed into the bottom bunk with me. One false move and he’ll be on the floor, flat on his butt. The hope in my heart blooms, remembering the way he touched me, and how it made me feel to make love to him. My experiences with sex have been complicated.
First, there was Charlie. Having sex with him only taught me how much there is to lose when you’ve let someone that close. After that, I decided that emotional attachments weren’t for me. The other guys that came along were fun, but nothing special. That’s not to say they were lacking—I was. Sex was something I thought if I kept casual, I could protect myself from interference with my past. Distance was my answer for everything and the fallout from Charlie was all the assurance I needed. I didn’t understand that by not investing my heart with what my body was doing, the closer Drew was brought to the surface. Tears pool in my eyes as my brain fires off neurons of awareness like the Fourth of July. From the beginning, Ryan has always chased thoughts of Drew away because of how I feel about him. There is no room for Drew because everything between Ryan and me has been rooted in love.
“Good morning, gorgeous,” Ryan grumbles.
“Good morning, indeed,” I smile, running my fingers through his messy blond hair.
“Damn, I had the best dream,” he yawns, “my fantasy girl professed her undying love for me in between several rounds of mind blowing sex.” I giggle and cover my blush with my hands. Ryan chuckles as he peels my hands away and brushes my mouth with his, “I love you, Beth.”
“I love you, too, Ry.” I close my eyes and nuzzle his chest. The whole world is waiting for us outside the walls of our childhood sanctuary, and I’m afraid of what will happen when it beckons us back to our lives.
“What’s floating around that beautiful mind of yours?” Ryan kisses my forehead and pulls me tightly against him.
“The real world,” I sigh.
“We’ll figure it out, Beth. One thing at a time, together,” he whispers against my lips, kissing me with tenderness that curls my toes.
“My dad is going to kick your ass,” I chuckle, “then he’ll turn you over to Pops.”
“I don’t expect them to take it easy on me, but I did text Melissa yesterday afternoon so someone knew where we were.” He grins sheepishly as my eyebrow shoots up in surprise.
“Afternoon? Really? You’re pretty confident in your seduction skills, Cantwell,” my tone drips with sarcasm.
“Seduction? Nah. Still, there was no way I was going to let you leave here without telling you that I’m in love with you.” The reverence in his gaze steals my breath.
“I beat you to it,” I smile, “but I like that you were willing to fight for me. I can be a real stubborn ass.”
“What about your ass?” Ryan teases, rolling me onto my stomach and palming my rear, “It looks pretty damn good to me. Let me make sure.” Playfully he nips me, the sting making me squeal. “Mmm...damn good.” His hands knead my flesh while his mouth samples the dimples of my lower back. I moan when he licks his way up my spine and shiver when he peppers my shoulders with light kisses. “I love your freckles,” he groans against my shoulders. The moment is sufficiently ruined when I burst out laughing at his comment. He flips me onto my back, pinning me with his body, ”What?” he grins.
“Ryan Cantwell, you don’t need to sweet talk me. I think we’ve established that I’m a sure thing,” I giggle, running my fingers along the sharp angle of his jaw. He frowns at me and shakes his head; I freeze with my hand against his face.
“Elizabeth Irene, I’d never lie to you about anything, but especially the things about your body that drive me crazy.” Through hooded eyes he drinks in my body, stopping to caress my breasts. “I love this one here.” His knuckle drags along the underside of my sensitive flesh, making me shiver. Continuing down my body, he pauses to kiss the inside of my knee, “And the one here.” My skin is on fire everywhere he touches me. “But this one is my favorite.” My eyes open wide when he lifts my foot to his mouth. I almost yank it away from him, but when he presses a sweet kiss to the freckle peeking out from between my second and third toe, I melt. Releasing my foot, he prowls forward and kisses me senseless. “They’re sexy, just like you so don’t you forget it.”
The rest of the morning we spend worshiping one another before we head back to Gran and Pops’ house. When we pull into the driveway, I smooth invisible lines from my dress. I don’t know who I think I am kidding, I’m wearing the same dress from the funeral yesterday and they’re going to notice. Even if they didn’t, there is always the fact that I didn’t come home last night.
“I feel like a teenager getting busted for sneaking back in the house after curfew,” I groan.
Ryan chuckles at me and squeezes my hand. “I’m not sending you in there to face the firing squad on your own,” he reassures, “besides, you’re a grown woman. It’s not like they can ground you. Your dad does seems like a reasonable guy.”
“Oh, you laugh now, but wait until Pops gets hold of you. You had his baby girl out all night, corrupting her, no less.” It’s my turn to laugh as the blood drains from Ryan’s face.
“Shit.”
“Shit, indeed,” I agree. “Speak of the d
evil.” I nod toward the porch.
Pops is standing at the top of the stairs with his hands on his hips. “You hanyaks better get your asses in here
, now
.” If he were a cartoon character, steam would be shooting out his ears. He points to us and then to the house before he stalks inside, slamming the door behind him.
Ryan holds tightly to my hand as we step into the living room where Pops, Gran, Uncle Rob, Aunt Melissa and my parents are waiting. I shift from one foot to the other as I wait for someone to say something.
“Boy, I ought to take you out back and tan your hide.” Pops’ face is red with anger, and he’s directing it all at Ryan.
My mouth drops open in shock; I’ve never seen Pops’ behave this way.
“
James
!” Gran shouts. She must really be pissed because I don’t think I have ever heard her call Pops by his first name. “You watch your mouth. There is no need to threaten Ryan.”
Pops glares at Gran while Aunt Melissa watches slack-jawed and Uncle Rob shakes his head in disbelief. My parents watch from the sidelines, more than willing to let Pops have the limelight. My dad narrows his eyes at Ryan, and my mom chews the inside of her cheek, trying not to laugh.