The Dom of My Dreams: A BDSM Novel (57 page)

How could I resist a man who so completely believed his world revolved around me just as my
world revolved around him?
 
And how could I run away from that?

When he revealed his beautiful naked body to me, he had also shown me the depths of his love for me.
 
He had revealed his nakedness just as I’d bared my soul to him.
 
And when we made love, he’d given me what I’d been seeking, what I’d been missing my whole life, and gave it with no reservations.
 
He held nothing back.
 
I remembered looking into those eyes, those deep, beautiful, mysterious green eyes that spoke with uncontainable emotion—an emotion I now realized was love—just waiting for me to respond to their silent longing.
 
And in that sweet, glorious moment, we had connected in a way that went beyond the physical.
 
Our connection was spiritual.
 
Soul deep.
 

A river of tears leaked out of my eyes as I got up and walked slowly toward the window.
 
They were tears of joy, tears of love, and tears of regret.
 
I had been a fool, avoiding the man who had taught me to become a better person, a man whose love had proven to be unwavering and strong, not to mention patient.
 
Well, not always patient, and he was certainly no saint, but you know what I mean.

He was right—I was a coward.
 
I might have been trying to change, might have been uttering pretty words about becoming a better person, but deep down I was simply making up more excuses.
 
I was scared shitless, nothing had changed.
 
Well, enough was enough.
 
It was time to free myself from the restraints that had kept me confined to emptiness and misery throughout my life, and like the satiny ties that held me prisoner in Seton’s bed, all I had to do was figure out a way to break free.
 
It was within my power to do so.
 
Seton was right—I had all the power in our relationship.

Did this mean that my fears of rejection were over?
 
No, they were not, but damn it, I wasn’t going to let fear win.
 
I would get past this, and if I couldn’t, my sexy, gorgeous Dom would keep me on my toes.
 
If he had to spank me a thousand times to force me to face my inner torments, then so be it.

Smoothing away tears, I moved away from the window and dashed toward the door, falling on my ass when I stumbled over Seton’s bag.
 
Scrambling to my feet, I accidentally kicked the bag and sent it sliding toward the door.
 
And that was when I saw them—two tiny black boxes peeking out from inside the bag.
  
A kaleidoscope of emotions flickered within me, and I almost fell on my ass again.
 

Slowly, cautiously, I crept my way toward the bag and snatched it up.
 
I reached into it and removed the two velvet boxes and a folded piece of paper.
 
The slightly larger box revealed a new ankle bracelet and toe ring.
 
This new set was in shiny yellow gold, white diamonds and rubies twinkling around it.
 
When I opened the smaller box, a gold ring with a huge white diamond encircled with tiny rubies glinted at me.
 

My knees nearly buckled beneath me, and I reached out to press a hand against the door to steady myself.
 
Trembling now, I unfolded the note and read it.

Marry me.

 
That was all it said.
 
Short, sweet, straight to the point.
 
It wasn’t a proposal.
 
It was a command.
 
An order.

I laughed through the tears that trickled down my face.
 
Oh, Seton, I thought as I slid the ring into my finger.
 
That is
so
you!

 

 

 

Chapter Seventeen

 

Here I was, on my way to be with the man I loved, armored with nothing but a raincoat (I’d rushed home to strip off my clothes and grab the coat), the ankle bracelet and toe ring, the engagement ring, and my heart.
 
(There was something else too, a sexy surprise for Seton.)
 

To this day, I still didn’t know why I had been so afraid to love.
 
Maybe it was due to my parents’ rocky marriage, or maybe it was due to my father’s rejection, or perhaps love and affection had been absent almost throughout my life, but whatever it was, my fears had been genuine, and they almost sentenced me to a lifetime of loneliness and bitterness.
 
Thank goodness for Jeremy.
 
Perhaps I’d had love in my life after all—the unconditional love of a good friend.

           
I paid the driver, smoothed down my raincoat so that it reached my calves and scooted out of the taxi, dashing brazenly to the side door of Seton’s stylish Colonial house.
 
A rush of excitement fluttered through me as I rang the doorbell.
 
My palms were sweating and my heart was racing, and I had to take several deep breaths to calm down a little.
 
I couldn’t wait to see the look on his handsome face when I told him that his wish was, once again, my command.

           
Seton answered the door, and my breath left me for a few seconds.
 
His green sweater brought out the color of his eyes while the tight fit of his blue jeans outlined the long, strong length of his legs.
 
His skin was a little pale, his face dusted with stubble, and there were dark circles underneath his eyes.
 
His shoulders were drawn with tension, his body rigid.
 
He looked like a sexy, brooding vampire.
 
It appeared that he hadn’t had any decent sleep, probably from working on revising his book so that it reached me on time.
 
Tears of love and regret stung the back of my eyes.
 
I couldn’t believe I’d put him through so much.
 
I knew now that he deserved better than what I gave, because even though he’d done awful things to me, he had been sorry, and he’d done everything in his power to make it up to me.
 
Now it was my turn to make it up to him.

I reached out to hug him but stopped.
 
His expression wasn’t the one I had expected.
 
No recognition filled his eyes, no emotion passed over his features.
 
He just stared at me with eyes that were cold and vacant.

My shoulders sagged.
 
Was it too late?
 
Had he changed his mind about us?

           
I was about to leave when his eyes slid to the raincoat, then dipped to my ankles, and traveled over to my left hand.
 
Tension left his body, and his flat expression changed to one of longing so intense it almost undid me.

           
“Do you know how frustrating it is,” he began, the seductive lilt in his voice sending shivers of pleasure through me, “to be deprived of that gorgeous body of yours for two solid months?”

           
The words were barely out of his mouth when I pounced on him, almost knocking him to the ground.
 
Regaining his balance, he slammed the door shut and wrapped his arms around me, cupping my buttocks and lifting me up as he crushed his lips to mine.
 
With my legs circled around his waist, I let him carry me to the sitting room.

           
“By the way,” he said when the kiss ended, “don’t ever use the side door again.
 
My future
wife
will use the front door and only the front door.
 
Understand?”

           
The rough dominance in his velvety-smooth tones had my toes curling in delight.
 
“Whatever you say, Sir.”

           
Seton growled, a sound that just about caused my blood to heat up.
 
Then he reclaimed my mouth in an earth-shattering kiss.
 
We came up for air after what seemed like hours.
 
I opened my eyes, and desire gazed back at me.

           
A flutter of tenderness radiated along my heart.
 
Without thinking, I opened my mouth and said the words that I should have said ages ago.
 
“I love you, Sir.”

           
The look he gave me lit fires deep in my soul.
 
“I love you too, my pet.”
 
His lips brushed mine.
 
“I love you so damn much.
 
You have no idea the hell I went through when I thought I lost you.”

           
Oh, I knew he went through hell, because I went through hell too, which was why…

“Don’t worry,” I said, smoothing a finger to his lips, outlining them.
 
“I have every intention of making up for the lost time.”

           
 
His hand caressed my hips as he put me down, a naughty little smile touching the corners of his mouth.
 
“Oh, we shall make up for the lost time, my pet.
 
Starting with now.”

           
Mmm.
 
That was exactly what I had in mind.
 
I’d longed for his wonderful touch for endless weeks, and I had no intention of wasting another precious second.
 
Slowly, seductively, I unfastened my belt, worked on the buttons and stripped off my coat.
 
I stood naked in front of him.
 
Seton drew in a sharp breath when he saw the ruby-stoned nipple chain attached to my hard nubs.
 
It had been a while since I’d worn nipple clamps and my breasts felt extra tender from the pressure they produced.
 
But, hey, these clamps had rubies on them—they matched with my other twinkling accessories!
 

Seton took a couple of steps back and spent a solid minute simply looking at me, his eyes growing dark with passion.
 
I thought I would die if he didn’t take me soon.
 
Quivering with need, I cast needy eyes at him and sighed.
 

“Fuck me, Sir,” I whispered longingly.
 
“Please.”

           
He was powerless to resist my plea.
 
A low, husky groan escaped his lips, and after that, only the sounds of our labored, lust-filled breathing poured into my ears.

           
We moved frantically against each other.
 
Seton took me to the plush leather chair, then he plopped down onto it and pulled me to his lap.
 
He removed his sweater and unfastened his jeans in a way that resembled a man whose clothes had caught fire.
 
He lowered his underwear and his cock popped free.
 
Awash in anticipation, I had to force myself not to pounce on him again as I took in the glorious sight of his strong, nude physique.
 
I sat up straighter and swung one leg around so that I straddled him and, sitting on his legs, stared at the trunk of flesh that curved up his torso.
 
Damn.
 
He was so big and hard.
 
So beautiful.
 
I had never wanted anyone so desperately in my life.

           
Seton pressed small kisses across my face as he curled his fingers around my waist and lifted me, situating me just above his erection.
 
Coils of fire began to light within me, awaiting the heady contact that was about to begin.
 
Nothing happened for a few seconds, and I swept an inquisitive look at Seton.
 
A smug, dare-devilish glint flickered in his eyes.

 
          
“Don’t even think about it!” I countered desperately.
 
“No games, Seton.
 
I need you and I need you
now
.”

           
He kissed me again, and whatever annoyance I felt were irreparably squashed when he lowered me onto his delicious, rock-hard shaft.
 
I gasped as my body stretched to accommodate his thickness, but I accepted him eagerly and willingly.
 
He pulsated inside me with an intensity that resounded in my very soul.
 
I began to move slowly above him when…

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