Read The Doctor and Mr. Dylan Online
Authors: Rick Novak
“You look like hell, Johnny,” she said.
“Thanks, Mom. Did you think that would make me feel better?”
“I’m not here to make you feel better. I’m here to stop this girl. She needs an abortion.”
Johnny glowered. “She won’t have an abortion. Her parents are both pro-lifers who’ll never agree to an abortion.”
“What is this? The fucking 1950’s?” Alexandra ranted. “Teenagers who get pregnant can decide to have an abortion without their parents’ consent. This isn’t Kabul. What will it take? How much money will it take?”
“You’re disgusting, Mom. You can’t buy everyone. You can’t control everything.”
“Don’t talk to me like that. I traveled all night to be here, and I demand you show me some respect.”
“Whatever.”
“Whatever doesn’t sound like respect.” She chugged the rest of the Bud, wiped her lips, and said, “Let’s keep this simple, Johnny. Two things need to happen here: I want this girl to give up the baby, and I want you to move back to California.”
Johnny mumbled an F-bomb under his breath. “The second one’s easy, Mom. I’m not moving back. And the first one? Echo’s not giving up this baby, and I love her. I’m going to be a teenage Hibbing groom like Dad was.”
“Like your Dad? Your Dad sabotaged his youth by knocking up his high school girlfriend. He’d still be circling the drain if he hadn’t met me.”
“That’s a lie, Alexandra,” I said. “I’d already finished medical school when I met you. I had my life together just fine.”
“You were a penniless research doc driving a ten-year-old car. I put you on the map.”
“Right. I wouldn’t know how to wipe my own ass if it wasn’t for you.”
“You’re an asshole, so it wouldn’t be that hard.”
“Shut the fuck up, both of you!” Johnny screamed. “You two are just the same as you were in California. I can’t stand it. Dad, I’ve been awake since 3 a.m. I’ve got to see Echo. I can’t wait any longer.”
“You’re going to have to. It’s way too early.”
“Mom, you want to talk to Echo’s mother, right?”
“I do.”
“Then put down the alcohol, sober up, and let’s go over to her house.”
Alexandra smacked her empty beer bottle onto the coffee table. “You’re a man of action, Johnny. You got that part of your personality from me. Let’s go.” She pulled on her jacket and flipped up the hood.
“It’s six a.m., Alexandra,” I said. “They won’t even be awake yet.”
“They’ll be awake. Nobody sleeps when shit like this is going down. Let’s go, Johnny.”
“Dad, are you coming?”
“None of us should go over there now,” I said. “Alexandra, you need to respect these people when you meet them.”
“I will be the epitome of class and dignity. I’m a consummate deal-maker, and I win more friends with honey than with vinegar. Let’s go, Johnny.”
“Come with us, Dad,” Johnny said. “You need to be there. Please?”
“I’ll come,” I said. For months I’d told Lena what a bitch Alexandra was. Lena was about to get a first-person demonstration. Alexandra was set to barge into Lena’s house holding a bent coat hanger, intent on scraping out Echo’s pregnancy with her own hands.
Our families would be at war, and the first shot was only minutes away.
All the lights were on when we arrived at the Johnson house. Lena answered the door, and Alexandra said, “Hello. I’m Johnny’s mother. I just flew in from California. We need to talk.”
Lena’s hair looked like straw spewing from a scarecrow. Her face was a tortured mask. She shot me an inflamed look. Alexandra was the last person she wanted to see.
“I apologize for arriving unannounced, Lena,” I said. “Echo wasn’t returning Johnny’s calls, and he really wants to see her.”
Johnny cast a longing look up the staircase. “Is there any chance I can I talk to Echo? Alone?”
“It’s not a good time,” Lena said. “She’s still in bed. She had a bad night.”
“This is a difficult time for all of us,” Alexandra said, peeling off her jacket and gloves. She was prepared to stay a while. She was on her best behavior so far, her voice lilting and syrupy. Alexandra was playing the scene like we were all allies. “I think it’s important for us all to sit down and talk. I feel so bad that our two children have fallen into this pregnancy.” She made it sound as if Echo and Johnny had tripped in the woods and plummeted into a booby trap.
“I’d offer you some coffee, but …,” Lena said.
“I’ll pass,” Alexandra said. “When do you think your daughter will wake up? I’d really like to meet her.”
“This is not a good time. She needs to rest.”
“I understand, but I did travel all the way from California to help Johnny. I can’t very well understand the situation if I can’t meet his girlfriend.”
“Echo is pretty shook up right now.” Lena said. “Having a conference with you at this time of the morning won’t be high on
her list.”
The key to dealing with Alexandra was to avoid making her angry. Lena never read that owner’s manual, and she was flunking Alexandra 101. Her refusal to let Alexandra control the situation was tantamount to a slap in the face.
Alexandra went from congenial to domineering in a heartbeat. She put her hands on her hips and said, “Listen, Lena Johnson. This is how it’s going to be. It’s no use stalling. My son is too young to be a father, and your daughter is too young to be a mother. I need your assurance that this baby is never going to be.’”
“Never going to be?” Lena said.
“It’s time for an abortion. That’s what families do when this sort of unfortunate thing happens.”
“Abortion is not an option,” Lena said.
Alexandra clucked her tongue and said, “How much is it going to take?”
“How much what?”
“Why money, of course. Will $10,000 make this pregnancy go away?”
“I can’t believe you just said that.”
“I’m prepared to pay $25,000. Now. Today. How can you refuse? That kind of money could change your life.”
“No. That’s not going to happen.”
“$100,000 then. That’s my final offer.” Alexandra’s tone was fierce, and the worst part of it was that she seemed to enjoy it.
“Stop it, Alexandra,” I said. “This isn’t going to work. You need to stop it.”
“Leave me alone,” Alexandra said. “Stay out of this negotiation.”
“It’s not a real estate deal, Mom,” Johnny said. “Dad’s right. Knock it off.”
“I’m not leaving here without an agreement,” Alexandra said.
Lena’s mouth gaped. She was ready to erupt. She walked over to the front door, held it open, and said, “You need to leave. Take your money and stick it you know where.”
Alexandra grew more enraged. “This is ridiculous. My son is not going to be a father at age 17. Your daughter needs to see a shrink if she thinks having a child at age 17 is the answer to this problem. I’ll pay for it.”
“Your money isn’t going to make any of this go away,” Lena said.
“Alexandra, you need to leave,” I said.
“Stay out of this, Nico, you loser,” Alexandra screeched.
“Stop screaming, all of you,” came a voice from the second floor. There were footsteps on the staircase, and Echo appeared, dressed in a floor-length nightgown and pink slippers. Her arms were crossed over her chest, and her lips were pressed into thin pale lines. “I heard the whole conversation,” she said. “Johnny, please get your mother out of our fucking house.’”
The quarantine on Johnson F-bombs had been lifted. Both Lena and Echo could swear like the crustiest of millwrights. The room was charged and ready to explode.
“Echo, can we talk?” Johnny said.
“Not until your mother leaves.”
“Echo, let’s start over,” Alexandra said. “I’ve heard so much about you.” It was a bogus flip-flop. Now that Echo was on scene, Alexandra was trying to turn it around—searching for warm and fuzzy instead of irascible.
“I heard everything you guys said,” Echo repeated. “Get out of here. You and your money, get out.”
“Can I say something?” Johnny said.
“No,” Echo said. “Just leave. All of you.”
Alexandra did not budge. The three women had reached an impasse. Alexandra’s expression descended into a murderous glare. She wasn’t in charge, and Alexandra hated not being in charge. “Echo, I thought you loved Johnny,” she said. “Now you want to throw us out?”
“I will talk to you, Johnny,” Echo said, compromising. “But your mother needs to leave first.”
“Don’t play it her way, Johnny,” Alexandra said.
“No, Mom. I will play it her way. You need to go. Find a hotel and sober up. Leave us alone.”
“How dare you say that to your mother?”
“Because I’m not your little boy anymore. I’m not afraid of you.”
Alexandra frowned. The grim reality of this North Country morning was hitting her. Power had shifted. Her anger was not the foolproof weapon it was in California. “Ridiculous. I can’t believe any of this.” She stomped out, and the four of us stood alone in our predicament.
“I’m so sorry,” I said to Lena. “That was awful.”
“She’s the nastiest woman I’ve ever met,” Lena said.
“I can see why you guys left California,” Echo said.
Johnny walked across the room and up the stairs toward Echo. She didn’t retreat, and accepted his embrace. He whispered something into her ear. Echo nodded yes, and said, “Mom, can we be excused?”
“You may,” Lena said. We watched Echo take Johnny’s hand, and the two teenagers climbed the stairs out of sight. I was glad to see their bond unfractured. Lena lit up a cigarette. Her hands shook as she inhaled. “I’ve never seen a woman act like your wife,” she said. “Who does the woman think she is?”
“I wish you wouldn’t call her my wife.”
“She is your wife. How in the world can I be involved with you, when you’re married to a witch like that? She’ll ruin my life, one way or another. I don’t want that woman around my daughter ever again. Echo’s a teenager, she’s pregnant, and her life is a mess. She doesn’t need to be harassed by your wife.”
“Stop calling her my wife.”
“Divorce the bitch then!”
I was blown away. Echo’s pregnancy had turned Lena into a wreck. She blew a chain of smoke rings at me. “What’s up with the bribes? Offering us huge sums of cash for an abortion? Sums of money like that are unheard of in our world. Bobby would kill her if he heard that. Last night he was screaming so loud I had to hold the phone a foot away from my ear. Bobby hates Johnny and he hates you. I’m so worn down by all this.” She took another deep drag on her cigarette.
“Why are you smoking? Trashing your lungs isn’t going to help anything.”
“And you need to stop being my doctor. I need support right now, not criticism.” She stubbed out the cigarette and said, “I can’t believe any of this. Life was so good a couple of days ago, Nico. You and I were so good.”
“It’s all going to work out. Something positive will come of all this.”
“I don’t see how,” she said. “I don’t see how.”
I returned to Dom’s house, and Johnny followed me home later in the evening. He avoided me and retreated to the basement. I waited a few minutes before I went downstairs to talk to him. Johnny was sprawled on the couch, with a black knit cap pulled down over his hair. The unzipped bulk of a tan sleeping bag stretched up to his chin.
I sat next to his ankles and said, “You OK?”
“Oh, I’m just great. My girlfriend is pregnant and my psycho mother is orbiting. How do you think I am?”
I massaged the lumps of his feet. “I should have bought you a dozen condoms for your birthday instead of getting you a fishing rod.”
“It’s not your fault, Dad. I messed up. I didn’t think it would happen to me.” A Viagra commercial came on the television. Johnny said, “Viagra. Erections. Sex. Why is everything about sex? Sex screwed up everything for me.” He changed channels from ESPN to ESPN2, where a Cialis commercial was airing at the same moment. “More sex commercials. The advertising media dangles fucking in front of every sports fan’s face in America.” He turned off the TV and said, “I talked to my buddy Andy back in Palo Alto. His brother Rudy got his girlfriend pregnant at college last year. The chick got an abortion. She never told her parents. She just got it taken care of. She and Rudy are still together. Rudy said it was simple, that it was like his girlfriend went to get a haircut or something. The abortion was that easy.”
I’d seen dozens of abortions, and I knew they weren’t as simple as a haircut. Some abortion patients went off to sleep in a flood of tears. I could make those tears disappear with a syringe of propofol, but with Echo’s pregnancy that wasn’t going to happen. “How’s Echo doing?” I said.
“She’s hanging in there. She went to her dad’s tonight, but I’ll see her in the morning. Echo’s got a shift at the hospital. I was going to call in sick, but since she’s working, I’ll work too.”
“Is that smart? Are you guys really up for orderly duty?”
“It was her call. Echo says helping other people will take her mind off her own problems.”