“Don’t go near her.”
“You can kiss her goodbye, and you can kiss Olivia goodbye too.”
Simon’s voice became dangerously low. “Do not keep that little girl away from the people she loves just because you can’t have your way.”
“I hate you,” she spat.
“I’m sorry you feel that way.”
He sounded as if he were walking away from her.
“Simon, please, I need you!” she screamed. “I can’t—I can’t do this alone,” Amanda sobbed. She was so effective, Katy actually felt sorry for her, then annoyed with herself because she did.
“You’re not alone,” Simon said earnestly. “You’re surrounded by a loving family. Just open your eyes and look around.” A long pause. “And Amanda? Stop waiting for me. I told you years ago I was never coming back.”
Katy cringed. If Simon ever said those words to her, it would crush her. She couldn’t imagine how Amanda must feel at that moment. She didn’t want to feel sorrier for her, but she did. Loving Simon was heartbreak hotel.
“You promised Mark you would take care of me,” Amanda cried.
“I didn’t promise him I’d marry you.”
“How could you do this to him?”
“Leave my brother out of this!” Simon roared, finally losing his patience.
“How can I when you killed him!”
“Do you think he would have been here that day if you hadn’t told him his big brother fucked you first? Did that give you some sick sense of satisfaction?”
“Of course not.”
“Why’d you do it, Amanda? Why, after we agreed to never do it, why did you tell him?”
“Because he wasn’t you! He never was!”
“You’re a cold-hearted bitch, Amanda.”
Katy cringed at the icy contempt in Simon’s voice.
“I’m that way because you made me that way!”
“You’re right, I did. I allowed you come and go in my home, I allowed you to cry on my shoulder any time, day or night. I even let you pretend we had a normal life even when we both knew it was our way of dealing with Mark’s death. Yeah, I’m responsible for pulling the rug out from beneath your fantasy world and my denial. My bad for thinking I was helping both of us. I see now I wasn’t.”
The sound of the front door opening was music to Katy’s ears. “Just remember, Simon, I know things.” The slamming of the door made Katy jump in her tracks.
She stood silent for a long time, wanting to go to the hurting man downstairs, but Amanda’s words halted her. What did she know that was so damning to Simon? That he felt responsible for his brother’s death was out in the open. He’d told her that in Napa. Not the details but that he ‘killed’ him. In her heart, Katy knew it wasn’t intended, and as much as she wanted Simon to open up and trust her enough to tell her what happened, she refused to push that topic with him. He would tell her when he was ready.
Did Amanda think Katy didn’t know that Simon and she had been lovers? Simon was not a criminal, so what else was there?
Her need to comfort the man she loved hurried Katy down the stairs to him.
She stopped short when she saw Simon standing with his fists planted on the island. The hard muscles of his back worked as he clenched and unclenched his hands.
Lightly, she touched his shoulder. Starting, he turned around and grabbed her hand in a defensive move.
“Simon!” she gasped.
His tortured eyes held the world’s sorrows in them.
“Simon,” she breathed wrapping her arms around his waist and pressing her cheek to his thumping heart.
His body stiffened. “I feel like a piece of shit right now, Kat.”
“I don’t know what happened to your brother, Simon, but I do know you loved him.”
“I fuck things up, Kat. Even when I think I’m doing the right thing for the right reason, it backfires.”
She moved away, and spun him around. Okay, she didn’t actually spin him, but she forced him to turn around and face her, then she got up on her toes and in his face. “‘
I fuck things up, Kat
,’” she repeated. “You sound like a whiny little girl.” She poked him in the chest with her index finger. “Where is that hot captain who relentlessly pursued me until I gave in?”
“He’s wondering if he should have left you alone.”
“Oh, no you don’t. I know you’re hurting, Simon. I know you feel like you screwed up, but you didn’t. You forced me to talk about my issues, and stood by me when I did, now I’m turning the tables. Let me do the same for you. Trust me like I trusted you. Tell me everything, Captain West. Tell me now before I beat it out of you.”
A spark lit his eyes. “I’d like to see you try.”
She pressed full into him. “Don’t underestimate me. It will be your undoing.”
He slid his arms around her and pulled her harder against him. His erection said a forceful hello. But he didn’t kiss her or make any other sexual move. Instead, he rested his chin on the top of her head, and said, “I do fuck things up, Kat. It’s why I’ve never been able to maintain a long-term relationship in my entire life.”
She didn’t believe him. The Simon she knew may fuck things up, but not because he was an unrighteous bastard. Quite the opposite. Pulling back to look up at him she asked, “How long have you been a cop?”
“Twelve years.”
“And before that, what did you do?”
“Four years in the Army.”
“That’s two long term relationships.”
“I meant emotional ones.”
“You love your niece and she loves you.”
His eyes softened. “She doesn’t know any better. Yet.”
“That’s bull. Have you ever been in a committed relationship?”
“Like exclusive, you have a drawer at my place and I have one at yours, committed relationship?”
“Yes.”
“Not until you.”
“How long has your brother been dead?”
He stiffened and tried to push her away, but she held on tight. “I won’t let you, Simon. You can’t push me away.”
“Two years.”
“How old is your niece?”
“Five. He died two days after that picture on my laptop was taken.”
“I’m so sorry.”
He took the opportunity to move out of her imprisoning arms. He walked over to the coffee pot and poured two cups of coffee. Into one of the cups he stirred a healthy dose of creamer and handed it to her, the other he kept black.
He took a sip, then looked at her, then looked past her toward the front door. “If you know what’s good for you, you’ll walk out that door right now and never look back.”
few days ago, Simon’s words would have frightened her, but she’d come a long way since then and she was not about to let all that newfound confidence go to waste.
“Do you want me, Simon?”
“Yes, damn it.”
“Then fight for me.”
“I’ve never stopped fighting for you.” His green eyes mesmerized. Setting his cup down on the counter, he moved into her. Grasping her around the waist he lifted her up and perched her on the edge of the island. “Why is it, even when I’m angry at the world all I want to do is fuck you?”
Lifting her legs slowly, she wrapped them around his naked waist, pulling him into her. “Because I’m so fuckable.”
Sliding his big hand up her back and along her neck, he sunk his fingers into her thick hair and cupped the back of her head. He smiled, and lowered his head, but instead of kissing her, he rubbed noses with her. “If I remember correctly, your skirts don’t come with panties.”
Katy smiled and nipped his bottom lip. Drawing it into her mouth, she licked it. Simon’s manly groan sparked desire low in her belly. “But they do come.”
“Mmm, yes, they do.” He slid his tongue along her bottom lip then gently sucked it.
Katy sighed as her body liquefied. Simon’s deep rasp of approval warmed her to her toes. He did that to her.
“Simon,” Katy sighed.
“Shhh,” he said against her dewy skin.
“I just wanted to say, thank you for putting me first.”
His fingers tightened around the back of her head, and from beneath lowered lids she watched him close his eyes and sharply inhale. His body stilled. Except for the erratic thud of his heart against hers.
Unease spiked along her spine. “Simon?”
When he opened his eyes, she gasped. His expression, a complicated mixture of fear and regret, registered on the sharp planes of his face. “Simon?” she rasped. “You’re scaring me.”
“You’re scaring
me
, Cinderella.”
“How?”
“You make me feel things, want things, fear things I’ve never faced before. It makes me uncomfortable as hell.” He shook his head. “It’s a hell of a lot easier not to get tied up in emotions.”
She grabbed his chin when he made to look away from her. “It is easier, but it’s also lonely.” She brought his lips to hers and kissed him. “And so much more boring.”
When he didn’t respond with his earlier passion she pulled away from him, then pushed him out of her arms. “What’s going on in that head of yours, Simon?”
“I don’t want you to end up hating me for things in my past.”
“Why would you say that?”
“Because I don’t.”
“Be specific, Simon. What have you done or will you do to cause me to not love you?”
He visibly blanched at the “L” word.
“Does the “L” word make you uncomfortable?”
“All of this,” he made a hand gesture indicating the both of them. “Makes me uncomfortable.”
It made her uncomfortable too, but in an excited terrified way. “You’re a big bad, cop, deal with it.”
“I’ve killed men without flinching. I didn’t give a rat’s ass how they felt. I knew I was doing the right thing. With you, Cinderella, I’m not sure what the hell I’m doing.” He brushed her bangs from her eyes. “And I don’t want to mess this up.”
“I think you’re being too hard on yourself.”
“You need to be harder on me.”
“I’d like to say that I could never hate you, but I know that isn’t true because you have the power to hurt me more than any person alive. If you do hurt me? I’ll hate you for causing me such pain.” She shrugged and continued, “But like that saying goes, no pain no gain.”
“What do you want to gain?”
“I’m a greedy girl, Simon, I want everything.”
“What if I can’t live up to your expectations?”
“Then I drop you for the next hot guy that comes along and strikes my fancy,” she teased.
He was not amused.
Amanda’s threat as she exited Simon’s house, echoed in her brain. “What’s Amanda holding over you?”
He laughed caustically. “Her misery.”
“She’s in charge of her own happiness, Simon, that’s not your load to bear.”
Though his features still remained tight, his eyes softened. “I don’t want you hate me for other reasons, Kat. Reasons I can’t explain right now.”
“Oh, that sounds diabolic. Maybe part of your grand plan is to take me for all I’m worth?” She looked around at the well-appointed house. “Hmm, maybe not because it looks like even on a cop’s salary you’re doing ok. So I’m going to guess you aren’t using me for my money?”
“I have plenty of money.”
“Then maybe you’re using me for my friends in high places?”
“Rosie terrifies me.”
“Ah, then perhaps you’re using me for my research secrets?”
His face tightened for just the briefest of seconds before it passed.
She stiffened, wondering if she had hit a nerve. “If you want to know something about my research, Simon, just ask me.”
“I’m not interested in your research.”
“Then what?”
“I want to know how a sexy little lab bunny like you has managed to get so far under my skin, that she’s making me second guess everything I say and everything I do?”
“Maybe you do the same thing to her.”
He reached out and slid his fingertips along her cheekbone. “You make me want to be a better man, Katrina Winslow.”
“And you, Captain West, make me want to be a bad, bad woman.”
She slid off the counter top, and moved into him. Not touching him, she reached out and yanked the string tie to his flannel bottoms loose and pulled them down his thighs. His semi- erection thickened before her eyes.
She dropped to her knees, and he groaned.
“Shame on me, Simon,” she whispered.
“For what?” he asked, his voice low and throaty.
“All this time, all these orgasms between us, and never once have I tasted you.” She slid her fingertips along the underside of his thick shaft. The powerful pulse of his heartbeat thumped beneath her fingertip. His hard heat thrilled her. “I love that you get so hard so fast for me.”
Grasping him at the base of his shaft, he groaned and, arms fully extended, he leaned backward, gripping the opposite counter edge. “Yes, Simon, like that, fully exposed and at my mercy.” She looked boldly up at him. “The only thing that would make this better for me is if you were tied up.”
“Never going to happen,” he roughly said.
Gently she stroked him. “Hmm, I’m intrigued that you are so adamantly opposed.”
With her free hand she softly stroked his tight balls. “Jesus, Kat,” he ground. “I want to slam you down on the floor and fuck you into next week.”
“Oh, that would be too easy for you,” she murmured as she slid the tip of her tongue around the base of his cock. He hissed in a sharp breath. She licked him higher, leisurely lapping him like a slowly melting ice cream cone. As she wrapped her tongue around the sensitive skin just below the wide head, she sucked him there, flicking her tongue.
“Kat,” he sighed, his voice quaking.
She licked a long slow trail around his head then slowly sucked him into her mouth, sliding her tongue in languid swirls around the plump warmth of him. His salty precum added lubrication, and inch by inch she sucked him until she took him all the way in, the head of his cock sliding down her throat. His balls tightened as she continued to stroke them.
His muscled thighs constricted as his fingers dug into her hair. His loud groans of pleasure had her soaking wet and nearly coming while on her knees. She loved that she excited him so thoroughly. She loved that she could work him up so quickly and so passionately. She loved the power she wielded over him, not only sexually but emotionally. But it was a two way street. Because while he was at her mercy, she was also at his.
“Kat,” he moaned roughly. He thrust into her mouth, her saliva offering more than enough lubrication so that when he drove deep into her, she didn’t gag from his size. His hot, hard heat filled her mouth. “That feels so damn good.”
His hips drove relentlessly against her. To steady herself, she grabbed his thighs then reached around and dug her nails into his hard ass.
“Jesus!” he cried. She sucked hard at each of his thrusts, taking all he had to give, loving that she drove him this crazy. Digging her nails deeper into him, she held on as his hips rocked. His breath was loud and ragged, her pussy was on fire, she wanted him inside of her, she wanted—
His fingers tightened around her head, pulling her hair, holding her against him. His dominance over her made her wetter. She moaned as his cock slid in and out of her mouth.
“You like it when I control you?” he breathlessly asked.
Caught up in the moment, she nodded careful not to hurt him.
“Get on all fours,” he roughly said.
When she hesitated, he pulled her head away, reached down and scooped her up. In three long steps he set her down on the carpet in the living room. “All fours,
now
.”
“Simon,” she gasped not relishing their disconnect. But even as she protested, she dropped to all fours.
“Quiet, Cinderella,” he softly commanded, “Pull your skirt up and turn around. I want to see your honeyed cunt.”
“But—,” Unsure where he was going with his commands, she gazed up at him.
The passion in his eyes held hers. “Do you trust me, Kat?” he softly asked.
“Yes,” she breathed flicking the short skirt up over her backside.
His eyes burned with passionate fire as she exposed herself. Despite being on all fours, Katy felt empowered. He wanted what she had, and he would do almost anything to have it. More than that, she would do anything to give it to him.
He bent down and swatted her exposed bottom. “Then do as I say,” he dangerously crooned, “Or I’ll take you over my knee.”
The thought scandalized her as much as it titillated her. He must have caught the gleam in her eye, because his lips turned up into a wicked smile. “Would you like that, Kat? You spread out over my knees as I spank that sweet little ass of yours silly with one hand and finger you with the other?”