Read The Chaos Online

Authors: Nalo Hopkinson

The Chaos (28 page)

“There he was, stuck fast to the tar baby . . . and nothing to do but wait there until Brer Fox came by.”

I looked down into the glowing heart of Animikika and tried to figure out what to do next.

“Can you tell me how to get rid of a rolling calf? How to get back to my normal self?”

I’d lied to Spot. I was getting tired. I don’t know what I’d been thinking. That I’d be able to throw her into the volcano, at least stop her from turning other people into freaks like me. But I couldn’t get unstuck. I sat down. Threw myself onto my butt, more like. I planted one foot on the ground. I set the other foot onto Spot’s body and pushed, trying to pry her off me.

“Him kick the tar baby . . .”

It didn’t work. And now, damn her, she had four of my five ends bound to her. Spot and I were both panting hard, from fatigue and because it was bloody hot up there. A limp black tongue hung out of Spot’s mouth.

“Why can’t you just leave me alone?” I asked her.

“But you are your normal self. You carry your taint around with you.”

So I did the only thing I could do. Pushing with one leg, I dragged us right to the very edge of Animikika’s blowhole. “Looks like you’re stuck with me,” I murmured to Spot, who was pulling wildly to get away. Then I leaned over the edge until I overbalanced us, and Spot and I fell into the heart of the volcano. I thought I heard Tafari shout as we tipped over.

It was freaking hot in there! The fall was short. For the umpteenth time this weekend I landed on something hard. I lay there, overheated but undamaged, waiting to burn up. It didn’t happen. I opened my eyes. Everything was red and yellow, flames flaring upward, lava shooting out. And a sound like the biggest Bunsen burner in the whole universe.

Spot and I were on a ledge a few feet inside, just under Animikika’s lip. Spot was whimpering. I lay there in the mouth of the fire and watched it turn my clothing to ash, and the only time it burned badly enough to injure me was when the metal button on the waistband of my jeans went red-hot and melted onto me. I screamed and thrashed and begged for someone to help me then. Couldn’t thrash much; I was too stuck to Spot.

Slowly, the pain on my belly eased. I couldn’t see the button anymore. Spot was smaller too! Was she melting away? Burning up? I raised my head. No flowing black runnels of Spot stuff. No flames on her. No ashes. She was just shrinking. And something was squeezing me all over, like I’d put on a woollen bodysuit and stepped into hot water. Like my skin was getting too small for me. Ow, ow, ow.

And eventually that feeling passed too, and there was no more Spot. I sat up and looked down at my body. I was back to my normal size! Something was weird about my skin, though. I
couldn’t tell for sure in the red light inside the volcano. It’d have to wait until I got back into the daylight.

I stood up and started climbing. I slipped a few times when handholds and footholds crumbled under me, and at one point I was stuck halfway. The nearest handhold was out of reach. I stayed there until I got up the courage to leap for it. Caught it! I made it right to the top, and clambered out.

I looked down at my skin. Yup, I was black all over. A for-real black, not brown. And gleaming. “Kind of like a Shrinky Dink,” I muttered to myself. “Right on.” I had a scrape on my shin. A little broken line of red. I guess I hadn’t kept the magical healing powers. I so didn’t care right then.

I felt my head. I was stone-cold bald. Crap. Just my luck.

Tafari was sitting where I’d left him, under the peach tree. Richard was lying beside him. I shrieked Richard’s name and ran toward them both.

Taf’s jaw dropped open when he saw me. “Scotch? Is that you?”

“Yeah. Where’d you find Rich?” I dropped to my knees beside them.

“He was inside that thing you were eating. When you were gone, it turned brown and kind of melted, and there he was.”

Rich’s skin had a sickly gray undertone. His eyes were closed. I didn’t think I could take another blow. “Is he . . .”

“I’m here,” whispered Rich. “Just barely.” He didn’t open his eyes. “Now I know how the roots of a plant feel when you pull it out of the ground.”

I’d just come out of a volcano; I didn’t dare touch him. “Oh, God; I thought you were lost forever.”

“I thought I was lost forever, too. Listen, I’m really tired. Can’t talk too much.”

“Okay, but stay with us, all right? I couldn’t bear to lose you again.”

He nodded. He opened his eyes a little and looked at me. “Trust you to go changing into yet another outfit.”

“Bite me.” I don’t think he heard me. He looked like he’d fallen asleep. “Rich?”

“He’s okay,” Taf told me. “He keeps drifting off like that.”

Taf reached for me. “Careful,” I said. “I think I’m still hot.”

His smile was crooked. “You betcha you are. Still hot.” He touched a pinky tip to my shoulder. “A little warm,” he told me. “But I think I can handle it.”

I went into his arms. I sighed, as though I’d been holding my breath for a very long time. And then we were both sobbing.

When we’d both calmed down a little, he said, “Is that thing gone?”

“Kinda, yeah. It won’t be coming back to chase me anymore.”

“You don’t have any hair.”

“I know, right? The volcano must have burned it away. I really hope it grows back in.”

“And you’re black and shiny all over, like somebody enameled you.”

I swallowed. “Can you handle it?”

“Is it permanent?”

“How should I know?”

“It’s kinda cool.”

“Thank you.”

“And you’re naked.”

I smiled. Trust Tafari. The first thing on his mind had been whether I was okay. Other guys would have been all like,
Ohmygod there’s a totally naked shiny hottie in my arms; I must get with her.
“It’s nothing you haven’t seen before,” I told him.

He held me away from him. “Oh, you’re plenty I haven’t seen before. You’re amazing.”

He was giving me a good looking at. “Stop it,” I said. “You’re making me feel shy.”

“Here. Take my jacket. Sorry about the burn holes.”

I put on the jacket, the one I’d given him. It smelt of him. It was like coming home. “Taf, this is so short it’s almost worse than wearing nothing at all.”

He leered at me. “Yeah.”

I would have shoved his shoulder, but in his present condition that probably wasn’t a good idea. Besides, all I could do was smile. “Hey,” I said, “we need to get off this mountain. Rich?” Had he been able to get help for us before the bubble had released his body back to him?

He coughed weakly. “I’m on it.” He sounded very pleased with himself. “Our ride should be showing up any minute now. That was some weird lady you sent me to.”

“Tell me about it.”

“Think she’ll have room for one more?”

“Yeah, probably.”

A loud caw split the air. Taf held his palms to his ears. I looked in the direction of the sound. Out of the cloud of smoke came the giant bird. Its gold and red plumage was the brightest thing in the sky. I smiled. “So Rocky’s gonna be our ride. I guess it’s Izbouchka’s turn to sit on the eggs.”

“Holy shit,” said Tafari. “That thing’s not coming here, is it?”

“It’s okay. It owes me a favor. It’s going to take us home.”

Tafari stared at the bird and swallowed. “You’re sure about all this?”

“No way am I sure.”

“Scotch,” said Rich hoarsely. I knelt close to him so I could hear him better. “Did you hear Dad? On the phone?”

“Dad? When?”

“When I put the call from him and Mom through to you in High Park.”

“You bastard! You were eavesdropping.”

“Yeah. And Dad cried because he thought I might be dead.” His voice was weak, but he was smiling. He couldn’t see it, but I smiled back.

“Guess the old man has a heart after all.”

FIVE THINGS YOU THOUGHT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN TO YOU

 

So here I am again, after all that excitement, sitting in school and filling out one of Mrs. Kuwabara’s endless questionnaires. At least I have something interesting to write this time.

 

1. The first, biggest thing is the Chaos. It came, it changed everything, it went, and the world more or less survived. Not all of us, obviously. Jimmy Tidwell lost his sister, his granddad, and his mom. I see him in class, and he looks as though he doesn’t know what hit him. Panama won’t talk about whether or not she lost anybody. In fact, she refuses to talk at all. The dance battle never happened; too many of the competitors were missing, injured, or dead. Besides, the hall where it was going to happen was now a pile of rubble. Every class I go to, there are more empty chairs than there used to be. I
feel as though I’ve attended a million funerals. I’ve cried and cried, and I know there’ll be more tears to come. There are people I will miss for a very long time. Our school has started doing grief counseling for students and staff. I’ve learned what the letters in “PTSD” stand for. There’s still no explanation for what the Chaos was, what caused it, or what made it go away. Animikika sank, almost as quickly as it had risen. I don’t know what happened to Izbouchka and Rocky and their eggs, or to the old lady. Sometimes I’m tempted to go outside and say, over and over again, “Dacha maya, idti syuda,” just to see whether Izbouchka comes. But I promised the old lady I’d never do that again. I kinda hope she’s okay, wherever she is. I thought she was scary at the time, but now that I think about it, she didn’t do anything that scary.

 

2. I became a hideous monster for a while. That was the thing I’d feared the most, and it happened. I still have nightmares about being attacked by Spot. In my dreams, when the rind covers my skin, it blocks up my nose and mouth, too, and I start to choke. A couple of times, I woke up screaming. Because my nightmares came true once before, so how do I know they won’t this time? It’s true that a lot of the symptoms of the Chaos are fading away. Mom says that it’s as though the whole world suffered a flu epidemic, only the sickness we had was the Chaos. People on the news have been talking about whether we’ll see successive waves of it, like we do with the flu. I hate to think about something like the Chaos happening ever again, but I hate to think about a lot of things. Doesn’t stop those things from happening. When
night terrors wake me up, Mom makes me hot cocoa. She lies on my bed beside me while I drink it. She tells me stories until I fall asleep again. Sometimes I get her to tell me the one about Brer ’Nansi and the tar baby.

 

3. Speaking of my skin, it’s faded from a shiny metallic black to a rich dark brown. It’s turned back into plain old skin, except I’m darker than Mom! And I love it. Even though security guards follow me more often now when I go into stores. Even though some of the guys who used to be sniffing around me now look at me like I’m the help; which is to say, they don’t see me at all. I love it, and I hope I stay this shade, because then no one will ever again tell me that I don’t look black.

 

4. My friend Gloria is a lesbian! Even though Punum broke up with her, Glory still likes girls. Punum said Glory was too “ableist.” I had to look that one up, but when I did, I understood. I couldn’t date someone either who couldn’t wrap their mind around the fact that even though we both live in the same world, my world is a different one from theirs. I think Gloria’s beginning to figure out how that works. It was too late for her and Punum, though. Punum’s dating Kathy from Bar None. When she and Kathy look at each other, they both go all goo-goo eyed. And the coolest thing; Punum’s eyelashes are still gold. She got a steady gig working with the organization that’s helping the Toronto Island dwellers rebuild their homes. She’s got a new guitar on layaway.

 

5. I have a Horseless Head Man as a pet. I never thought I’d actually want one hanging around me. Horseless
Head Men were one of the things that didn’t disappear when the Chaos went away. Aunt Mryss still has her two. But she doesn’t play the “Out, Spot” game with me anymore. Her Horseless Head Men are named Mickle and Muckle. I named mine Charlie; get it? Charlie Horse. Ben thinks it’s the silliest joke he’s ever heard. Ben also says that his invisible friend, Junior, is still hanging around. He’s getting really good at not letting on. Only Glory and Stephen and I know about it. Sometimes I think I can feel a slight breeze when Junior walks by me, like a goose walking on my grave.

 

6. I think I can wait a couple more years before I move out of my folks’ place. Isn’t that wild? Funny what a difference a couple days can make. Rich says he’s no longer in a big hurry to move out, either. For one thing, he’ll need a few more weeks to recover from having been inside that bubble for nearly two days. Plus things are different at home nowadays. Dad still tries to put Richard down for every little thing, but now he does it like he’s joking. He hugs Rich a lot, too. Rich has started spitting some of his rhymes for Dad; the ones he’s polished to a shine by rehearsing them on long-suffering Tafari and me. And Dad listens! Sometimes he’ll roll his eyes and say something sarcastic about a particular line, but sometimes he’ll nod at a line as though he agrees with it. He’s been boasting to his friends about his son the poet.
   And yes, I told Mom and Dad that I was dating Tafari. They seemed okay with it. They have their minds on bigger things. Two of Dad’s ten employees died during the Chaos. His brother back home in Jamaica is in the hospital. They’re not sure whether he’ll survive.
And no one’s seen Mom’s best friend here in Toronto, not since Animikika rose. I guess that compared with stuff like that, the news that your daughter wants to be a professional dancer and is dating a really nice guy doesn’t seem so bad. So Taf and I are still together, and that’s great. But lately, I’ve been thinking about it. Tafari’s wonderful. He’s nice and normal and he treats people well, and he has a car and he’s hella cute. If his dad is anything to go by, he’s going to stay cute for a long time. But as much as he can, he’s going to do everything in his life exactly the way he’s expected to. Finish high school. Go to university, major in something that looks really impressive on a resume. Use that resume to score a good job, and soon after that, find a wife and start having kids with her. He’s already talking about how good-looking our children would be. Part of me thinks that’s awesome, but part of me hungers for something different. I don’t even know what it is yet, but I’m going to go find it. It’d be great if Tafari wanted to find it with me; in fact, I’ll be a total wreck if he doesn’t. But I’ve been a total wreck a couple of times already in my life, and I’ve learned that I can make it through to the other side.
   Yeah, I know this is six and I was only supposed to list five. Bite me.

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