The Best of Fools (Jane Austen Book 2) (14 page)

Anyway, Autumn came over the day before to help with decor. Donovan offered his hand tonight, knowing Zoe would be at work. She'd probably be sniffing the place after he left.

He did some manlyish things, like hanging pictures and setting up the sales desks and furniture. We barely talked, but I needed to get him alone. Something was bothering him and so long as Brooke and Han, my two seamstress girls, were around, he'd stay like that. Walking around like a half-dead person with his shoulders all slumped.

"He's not always so lively," I said to the girls.

Han, sweetest person ever, chuckled modestly, but Brooke didn't hide her unmistakable laugh.

"Lively?" Brooke said. "Hate to see what he's like when he's tired."

"Hardy har," Donovan said. "Actually, I am tired."

Code word. He wanted me to make them leave. Since about fourth grade we had code words. "I'm tired," was our code for, "We need to talk. Alone."

I waited a few minutes and told the girls we could pack up and keep going tomorrow. Brooke winked at Donovan as she walked away. Han, on the other hand, hid behind her purse and completely avoided him.

When the back door swung to a close he put his hands over his face and whined.

"What now?" I said. "Please don't tell me it's another girl."

"I didn't get it." He peeked at me through his fingers. "It's done, Jane."

"Zoe? She'll take you back in a second."

"I applied for lacrosse scholarships, but I didn't get any of them. Got my last official rejection today."

"Why though? Can't a coach notice you at a summer tournament still?"

"I give up."

I gave him a hug and pat his back. "There, there, boy."

He pinched my back.

"What if I lend you the money?" I stepped back. "How much is it?"

"No way."

"It's mine to use as I please, sir."

"I'm not accepting that." He slumped into the chair and knocked over a container of bobbins and needles.

We both knelt down to clean them up when something pierced my knee. I flipped over and grabbed my leg.

"Um, there's a sewing pin stuck in my knee."

Donovan looked at it. "I'll go get the pliers."

"Pliers?"

He sat beside me and held up the tool. "Pliers," he said. "I'll pull it out. Real quick."

"No!" I scooted away, unable to stand because my tendon freaked out every time I moved. "I don't see the ball in there. It went in ball side first."

He touched his chin to his neck. "The ... ball?"

I laughed and squeezed my knee. "There are balls on the tops of pins. This went into my leg ball first. If we pull it out I'm gonna get a ball stuck in my leg and get infected or something." I clenched my teeth. "It hurts."

He waved the pliers. "Just one second and it'll all be over."

"The ball. And look." I pointed. "It's bent in there. The pin is this big." I held up my fingers. "What if it went into my bone? Oh my gosh ... what if it's in my bone, Donovan?"

He pushed his lips to the side of his face.

"It's not funny." I tried to move. "I need to go to the ER."

"Can you walk?"

I attempted to stand. "It hurts. If I move that tendon it kills."

"Here." He put my arms around his neck. "I'll carry you to my car."

And he did.

We stopped at one of those quickie emergency places, but they were closed. To the real deal ER we went. Only weeks after my toe incident. Thankfully the toe wasn't broken, just crushed at the tip and healed pretty fast. Otherwise I would've looked like an idiot coming in with a foot wrapped up and a sewing pin sticking out of my knee.

Donovan carried me into the ER and sat me next to someone with blood soaked on his shirt and a child with a gaping hole between her eyes. And so basically ... I felt like an idiot anyway.

Once we finally got to my room the doctor or nurse or whatever he was came in, pressed on it, and came back with ... pliers.

No joke.

Donovan pushed his lips around again, trying his hardest not to laugh in my face.

"Um." I put my hand between the pliers and my leg. "What if it's in my bone?"

The doctor guy shook the pliers. "This'll do it. It's not in the bone. I can feel right where it is."

"Is it possible to numb it first?"

"Are you serious?" Donovan said. "Give me that thing."

"I can numb it," the guy said. "It won't hurt but a second though."

"Numb, please."

"The needle to numb you will hurt worse than pulling this one out. Come on." Donovan held my hands. "Squeeze my hands, close your eyes, and let's go to Wendy's for a junior bacon cheeseburger, shake, and fries with nacho cheese."

"You're horrible."

"Or the diner."

"Ready?" the doctor said.

"Are you a doctor?"

"Physician's Assistant."

"Okay." I gripped Donovan's hands and closed my eyes. "Go!"

Out it came.

And Donovan shook his head. "Shoulda let me use the pliers."

I laughed. "Sorry." I felt all around my knee. "What if the ba—"

"There's no ball in your knee." He laughed. "Let's go. I'll even carry you out for fun."

He carried me back to the car and we laughed about the pin during our entire Wendy's excursion. Then he took me home and gave me a hug goodbye.

"You wanna have a sleepover?" I pointed toward the door. "I've got Batman sleeping bags."

"Tempting." He smiled. "But I've got work in the morning and I don't want to see Zoe until she's moved on. Oh"—he tried to wink and failed—"who's the shy girl you've got working for you? She's cute."

"Yeah. That's Han. She's from Korea. Brilliant. Talented. Creative. She's really sweet too. Not your type."

"Han?"

I nodded.

"I want to ask her to dinner or something. Will she do it?"

I glanced down and picked at my overgrown cuticles. "Probably. Everyone loves you."

"Not everyone." He tapped my chin.

"Heh." I almost managed a smile. "Yeah."

After a week of intense sewing—I'm talking fourteen hours straight every day—I took a break to paint the walls. Han and Brooke kept up the sewing for me while Donovan, Autumn, and I painted the interior a nice cool grey.

Thankfully Zoe was at work, because I doubt she would've appreciated the way Donovan flirted with Han the entire time. Only in America two years, she brought with her this charm from Korea that made her impossible to dislike. Even I loved her and that's pretty strange when it comes to the girls Donovan likes.

Autumn dipped her roller into the bucket and slathered more paint on the wall while I worked on taping the other half of the room. Donovan disappeared again. With Han. Somewhere in the back.

I waited for Autumn to say something about his girl of the week, but she didn't.

"So," she finally cleared the air. "I decided to stay home this year."

"What?" I stopped taping. "Why would you do that?"

She twirled her hair and accidentally dropped a glob of paint on her foot. "I kinda met this guy."

"No." I went back to taping. "I'm not even acknowledging this."

"He's perfect for me, Jane."

"I wish I could explain to all of you that we are eighteen year olds and marriage should be the last thing on our agenda. Go to school. It's your dream to become a doctor. You've wanted to help people since you were a kid. So do it and if he's still around when it's done, then maybe he's the one."

"Don't be so negative."

"I'm being pretty positive actually. You have a free ride to the college of your choice. Don't ruin it for some guy who may not love you in a few years."

She painted in silence for a few minutes, then said, "So that Han girl and Don—"

"Yes. They're dating. Or going on dates. Not sure I know the difference, if there is one."

"She's like your twin."

I laughed and looked to make sure they weren't around. "She's Korean. We don't look anything alike. Just our hair maybe."

"No," she said. "She's so much like you. Only more shy and...."

"Go ahead and say sweet." I smiled. "I know it's true."

"You're just a little feistier and opinionated."

"Sweetness has never been my best trait."

"You're sweet." She laughed. "Seriously."

Han and Donovan came back into the room, eyes on each other Mom and Dad style. Don's eyes were brighter and Han's smile matched the brightness perfectly. They looked cute together. And they
were
cute together. She was the first girl to actually appreciate him and that made me feel like crap.

I was no longer the only girl who knew him, really knew him. They'd been dating a few short weeks, but she already knew things about him only I knew.

I thought back to the day in the hospital where I silently told him not to die. It felt like that now. Like he was dying. I was losing him.

Donovan went back to painting. Han sat down at her sewing machine. And they glanced at each other every few minutes. Her smile, all simple and surrounded by blushing cheeks, was killing him. In a good way. I could just tell.

He never looked at a girl like that before. Just me.

I finished taping the room and pretended not to watch them as I painted. Last time Donovan looked at me like that was in eleventh grade. We were cuddling on top of his car as the sun went down and he said something he shouldn't had promised.

"I'll wait forever for you or die waiting."

I'll never forget his face as I said, "You'll die alone then. Don't do that to yourself."

He lost the light in his eyes. He never told me that he gave up, but I could tell. His spark was gone. I killed it. He started dating all kinds of girls and the dynamic between us changed. Still good. Still close. But it changed. I knew I could bring the light back though. If I ever fell in love with him I knew he'd still love me. But now I doubted it because Han brought the sparkle in his eyes back. She beat me to it.

"You told him to die trying. What did you expect?" I whispered while spacing out at the wall.

Autumn tapped my shoulder. "You're talking to yourself in public again."

I slapped my hand over my mouth. "Did anyone hear me?" I quickly looked around the room and everyone was working. Everyone except Donovan. His eyes were on me.

"I heard you," Autumn said. "Not sure what it meant though."

We stared at each other. Donovan. Me. The rest of the room didn't disappear like I thought it was supposed to. The sewing machine hummed in the background. Rain dripped down the windows and tapped the sills. Autumn kept talking. Cars beeped outside. My phone buzzed across the room. Someone else's phone rang with a ridiculous pop song. Chaos. Absolute chaos around us.

But we stood there. Completely still.

I tried to smile.

He shrugged and crinkled his brow.

Comfortable awkwardness.

My phone vibrated itself right off the counter and hit the floor. Great timing. I needed an escape from the weirdities. I picked up the phone and opened the email.

Jane,

Did you get my last email? I hope I didn't scare you off. If you'd rather I hadn't been thinking of you, just pretend I didn't say that. ;-)

Jane?

I read it again as Han and Donovan kissed under an umbrella in front of the building. Looked like a freaking Nicholas Sparks cover.

I sighed and tried to reply.

Why wouldn't the words come?

"Hello, blinking cursor," I said. "Would you like some eye drops?"

"Don't mind her," Autumn said to Brooke. "You'll get used to it."

"I already am." Brooke laughed. "Hey, Jane. I've got another one finished. Wanna check it?"

"One sec."

Time to declare war with the blank email.

Dear Alistair,

I stopped. Inhaled. Exhaled. And tried to tell myself this was NOT a love letter. Just a friendly letter.

I continued:

Sorry. I've been super busy.

Well, that was painless. I thought about telling him that I was thinking of him too or at the very least acknowledging his declaration, but....

How are things in England?

That came out instead. So I kept going, promising myself I'd try.

I thought of you the other day when I was at the airport.

There. That should do.

Hope all is well!

Jane

And send.

Away it went. I checked Brooke's dress and approved it. "You're so good at this, Brooke," I said as my phone buzzed off the counter again. "If we make money with this place you're definitely getting a raise."

"I'm just happy to be here," she said. "I never thought my boss would be five years younger than me, but I have to say it's been fun. Your energy and passion for this has inspired me to start sewing again."

"That's so good to hear."

I picked the phone up again.

"Who's that? Mr. Anonymous?" Autumn teased. "I'm done with this wall. What's next?"

"We can start the trim where the walls are already dry."

Another email. So soon. With barely any contents.

Jane ...

That was all it said, but it was enough to bring those dreadful butterflies back.

I wrote his name, added some dots at the end, and hit send.

Another minute and he popped up again.

I got us a show booked at TLA like you said. October 27th. I know it's months away, but can I see you?

I wrote back:

That should be fun.

Good thing I wasn't trying to win an award for most flirtatious or anything. He emailed one last time and said he needed to practice. The guys were waiting for him, but he'd email me as soon as he finished.

Han came back into the store. Glowing. Then, in her cute little accent, she said, "He is very nice guy. Ah joh-eun."

"He is," Autumn said. "Are you in love with him?"

"Autumn!" I cut in.

"I don't know." The girl lit the room on fire with her radiance and she didn't know? "My father taught me to
be
in love, not to fall in love. He told me love is not something we feel. It is something we do. I have always been careful about feeling things. There must be harmony and peace around two people who marry. Everything make sense, you know?"