S
he actually went out and bought a brand-new
,
ridiculously priced comforter set
,
simply because my parents were coming for an overnight visit,
Phillip thought, and that was all he’d been able to focus on for two days straight. And though he was standing in the pulpit preparing to give his sermon, he couldn’t stop replaying that same thought, over and over again.
The whole idea of it was senseless and the reason he knew exactly how much Alicia had spent was that he’d eventually gotten her to tell him where she’d purchased everything from. Then, he’d called up Nordstrom’s 800 number and checked all recent charges. He’d even listened to the amounts more than one time before finally hanging up and was just sick over it. Because it wasn’t as if she’d be able to pay off the entire balance when the statement came. He would have to do it, and he was getting tired of all the debt she kept accumulating.
They’d been arguing on and off ever since he’d confronted her about those Visa and Victoria’s Secret statements, but the Nordstrom purchases had made things worse. They’d been at it all evening on Friday, which was the day he’d come home and seen everything, and the only reason they hadn’t argued the rest of yesterday or any today was that his parents were in town.
Phillip was beyond angry with his wife, and what bothered him the most was that she didn’t seem to care about his feelings in the least. All she cared about were her own, and it was as if she didn’t see one problem with that. Then, the other thing he didn’t like was the way he was now standing before the congregation, trying to keep a smile on his face and trying to pretend that life just couldn’t be better for him. He didn’t like doing this, and he wasn’t sure how long he’d be able to continue, which was why he hoped and prayed that he and Alicia would find some sort of common ground and end these issues they were having.
“You know, church, not every day is a good day.”
“No, it’s not, Pastor,” one lady responded.
“Some days are wonderful, but there are some days when you wish you could crawl back into bed, pull the covers over your head, and never get back up again.”
“He’s definitely telling the truth,” an older gentleman told another man sitting next to him.
“But then, we all know that life wasn’t meant to be perfect. Life wouldn’t be normal if we didn’t experience a few problems from time to time. It wouldn’t be real if we didn’t hit a few bumps in the road every now and then.”
The majority of the members nodded in agreement.
“It wouldn’t be real and the truth of the matter is, if we didn’t have problems, some of us would never, not once, get down on our knees and pray.”
“Boy, you know you’re speakin’ today,” another elderly gentleman offered.
“He’s so right about that,” Lena added. She was Curtis’s assistant.
Phillip locked eyes with Alicia. “Some of us think we deserve to have everything we want, when we want it, and never even bother to give thanks or consider how selfish we’re being. Some
of us care only about ourselves and we don’t care at all about who we step on in the process.”
Phillip could tell how annoyed Alicia was, just by the look on her face, but he didn’t care because he knew he was telling the truth. He was telling the kind of truth she very much needed to hear.
“Then, there’s the institution of marriage. Now, this particular subject has very little to do with the topic of the sermon I’ll be delivering today, but I really feel like I need to share a few marital observations for all the married people who are here today.”
He looked across the congregation and smiled when he saw the Kings because even though he hadn’t made much progress with Mrs. King when they’d met for the second time on Friday—mainly because her husband and niece’s baby had been born the day before—he was glad to see that she’d at least come to church and was sitting with her husband.
But then Phillip looked at Alicia again.
“Just last week, I was reading an article about the number of divorces that take place in this country every year, and I was truly saddened by it. There are way too many of them, and a lot of it has to do with the fact that people don’t take the time to find out enough about the person they’re marrying, they don’t communicate the way they ought to, and they have no idea that marriage involves a huge amount of give-and-take. Marriage is about two people who have become one in the eyes of God, and it’s up to both parties to act accordingly—meaning each party should always consider how their individual actions will affect his or her spouse. Always.”
Phillip looked at his parents, who seemed as proud as any parents could be, and he smiled at both of them. This time he didn’t bother looking at his wife again because he didn’t want to see the dirty looks she kept giving him.
“None of us is without fault, and we all make mistakes. Sometimes the mistakes are small, and sometimes they’re so huge they may seem unforgivable. But if God forgives us, then we have a responsibility as Christians to forgive our fellow man or woman exactly the same way.”
Phillip glanced at Mr. and Mrs. King but only for a short second.
“Forgiveness, especially when we’ve been hurt, isn’t always the easiest thing to offer, but it is possible and it is the right thing for us to do. Sometimes, forgiving the people who have wronged us, the people who have betrayed us, well, sometimes it seems like we just shouldn’t have to forgive them for anything. Sometimes all we want is for something bad to happen to them so we can feel like justice has been served. But I’m here to tell you that revenge is not of God. Revenge is wrong and something we should work hard to separate ourselves from.”
“Amen,” a woman toward the back agreed.
Phillip knew all that he’d said would help at least someone, but sadly his words weren’t helping him one bit. He was still furious with Alicia, and he was having a very difficult time forgiving her.
“So, married people, if you’re happy and truly enjoying each other, then I say God bless you, but if you’re married and having one problem after another, then please think about what I said. Refer to your Bibles because there are some wonderful scriptures in there on marriage that will truly help you. Then, sit down and just talk to each other. Pay attention to what your spouse has to say, and do what you have to in order to work things out. Realize that your relationship is not just about
you
but about both of you.”
“Amen,” members of the congregation said in unison.
“Now, before I move on to begin my message, I would be
remiss if I didn’t acknowledge my parents who are here visiting with us from Chicago. So, Mom, Dad, please stand up.”
Phillip’s parents stood, turned toward the audience and waved, and everyone applauded. Phillip smiled when he thought about how well they looked and how they could easily pass for ten years younger than their actual ages.
“Needless to say, I’m very happy to have them here with me today, and I thank all of you for giving them such a wonderful welcome as always. Then, if I could ask Ms. Brittany,” he said, turning toward the youth choir and searching for his favorite fifteen-year-old soloist, “if I could ask you to sing ‘His Eye Is on the Sparrow,’ you would really make my day.”
The young girl smiled at Phillip and then made her way to the microphone.
Phillip took a seat and waited for her to begin. As the introduction of the music played, Phillip scanned the pews and did a double take when he spotted Shandra Keyes, a woman he’d gone to high school with in Chicago—the woman he’d dated his entire senior year and thought he would marry. He was actually very shocked to see her and wondered why she was visiting all the way here in Mitchell, because as far as he knew, she still lived in the Chicago area.
He looked away but then glanced in her direction again and instinctively, they smiled at each other. Although, when Phillip saw Alicia peering toward the area where Shandra was sitting, that told him that Alicia had seen him acknowledging someone. Phillip was upset with his wife, but now he felt bad because, right or wrong, he couldn’t deny that he was happy to see his ex-girlfriend. He felt worse when he thought about all the great times he and Shandra had shared and remembered that the only reason they’d broken up was because they’d gone to separate colleges and the distance had proven to be too great for both of them.
Phillip returned his attention to Brittany who was singing as beautifully as every other time she sang, so he closed his eyes and enjoyed her amazing voice. Then, when she finished, he delivered his sermon as planned, welcomed a few new members who’d decided to join the church, and then he and Alicia stood at the entrance, greeting parishioners who were on their way out.
“I really enjoyed everything you had to say today, Pastor,” a twentysomething young man told Phillip and shook his hand.
“I’m glad to hear it.”
“That really is a gorgeous suit you have on, Ms. Alicia,” one of the mothers of the church said, complimenting the expensive navy blue outfit Alicia was wearing. Phillip could barely stand it.
“Why thank you, Mother Jacobs. You’re too kind.”
“Pastor,” Elder Jamison, the head of the elder board, said, “when you finish here, I’ll meet you in your office so I can give you a few more proposals that we received a couple of days ago from potential contractors. Pastor Black asked me to give them to you so that you and he can review them sometime tomorrow when he’s back in town.”
“That’s fine. Of course.”
Phillip shook one hand after another and so did Alicia, but he felt a bit nervous when he saw Shandra, standing only a few feet away. There were only four people in front of her, and he wasn’t sure how Alicia was going to take their meeting each other. If he could have gotten by without introducing them, he would have, but he already knew that there was no way Shandra had waited all this time just to say hello and pretend like she didn’t know him.
So, he greeted the next four members and then prepared himself to speak to her.
Shandra’s smile was wide and genuine. “Oh my goodness, Phillip, it’s so good to see you.”
“It’s good seeing you, too. How have you been?”
“Wonderful. And you?”
“Very blessed.”
“I’m visiting Donna, a close friend of mine, who’s actually a member here at the church.” Shandra turned and pointed to the woman directly behind her and Phillip recognized her right away. He didn’t know her personally but he’d seen her a few times in passing. “She’d told me about a year ago that you were the new assistant pastor. I was so excited for you, and I’d always said that if I ever got some time to spend the weekend with her, I was going to come to service.”
“Well, we’re glad you did. Come anytime. How are your parents?”
“They’re doing fine.”
“Please tell them I said hello.”
“I will. And is this your wife?”
Phillip looked at Alicia who’d obviously been taking in every word of the conversation. “Yes, this is my wife, Alicia, and, baby, this is Shandra.”
Alicia shook Shandra’s hand. “Nice to meet you.”
“It’s nice to meet you as well. Phillip and I went to high school together.”
“Really?”
“Yes, we go way back.”
“And how long are you in town for?”
Phillip looked straight ahead but wondered why Alicia was asking this.
“Just until this afternoon. I have to get back for work tomorrow.”
“Well, you have a safe trip back,” Alicia told her and then
looked away and struck up a conversation with one of the members standing on the other side of them. It was at that moment that he knew he and Alicia were going to have words about his ex.
“Well, Phillip, it really was good seeing you, and you take care, okay?”
“I will and you, too.”
Phillip watched her walk away but then caught himself as he realized Alicia was staring him straight in the face. He shook hands with the next person in line but couldn’t help thinking about the way Shandra looked. They were both thirty-two, but she appeared not a day over twenty-eight, and she was even more beautiful than he remembered.
But he knew it was wrong for a married man to focus on the beauty of any woman who wasn’t his wife and he was sorry.
Lord
,
I apologize.
He’d heard Dr. Frederick K. C. Price give a sermon on television one time about thoughts, ideas, and suggestions and how any of the three could get you in a lot of trouble if you weren’t careful. Now, Phillip knew Dr. Price was right.
He knew because even though he’d apologized to God for the thoughts he was having and was still standing right next to the woman he was married to, he couldn’t get Shandra out of his mind.
He couldn’t stop thinking about her—and that scared him.
A
licia wasn’t sure who this Shandra person was and why she’d suddenly decided to drop in at Deliverance Outreach, but just as soon as Phillip’s parents were on their way back to Chicago, she was going to find out. The woman had claimed she was visiting a friend who just so happened to be a member of the church, but Alicia didn’t believe it. She suspected it was more because, one, the woman had no sign of a ring on her finger, and, two, Alicia hadn’t liked the way the woman looked at Phillip.
Then there was that pre-sermon tirade about marriage that Phillip had conveniently decided to share with the entire congregation even though he was clearly speaking specifically to his own wife. Alicia had wanted to walk right out of the sanctuary, and there was a chance she would have, had she not been sitting next to her in-laws. They were such nice people and exceptionally kind to her, so she didn’t want to make a scene or ruin their visit. But she was at the point where she’d had just about all she could take of Phillip and his self-righteous attitude, and she was going to let him know precisely how she felt right after she found out what this Shandra chick was really up to.
Mom Katherine took another bite of her dessert. “This cake is simply divine. It’s even better than the last time we were here.”
Alicia ate a bite as well. “It really is good. And actually, I think it’s the best German chocolate cake you can find in the city.”
Dad Phil leaned back in his chair. “I like it myself, so, Kat, maybe we should have gotten a whole one so we could take it back with us.”
“I thought about it but then I realized how you and I would eat the entire thing by sundown tomorrow and that would be just terrible.”
“Well, it’s not like either of you has a weight problem,” Alicia added.
“No, sweetie, but we want to keep it that way, too.”
Alicia laughed. “I hear you, and I don’t blame you about that at all.”
Mom Katherine looked around the family room. “Alicia, I just love that painting you have hanging over the fireplace. It’s so exquisite.”
“Thank you. I bought it at an art gallery near downtown.”
“Here?”
“No, near downtown Chicago.”
“Well, it’s perfect. Everything in here is beautiful, and you’ve certainly done a lot of decorating in a very short period of time.”
“That’s pretty much all she did the first three months we lived here.”
Alicia wanted to kill Phillip for making that comment. He was being rude, but she was going to ignore him. For now.
“Well, it definitely shows,” Mom Katherine continued. “And, Phillip, you should be very proud of your wife and all the good
taste that she has. And you definitely should appreciate how clean and in order she keeps every room.”
“I do appreciate her—and the housekeeper who comes and cleans every Monday, too.”
How dare he try to diminish the compliment his mother had given her. But Alicia knew he was only doing it because he was still upset about those new bedroom and bathroom items she’d purchased. But so what? So what if she had because it wasn’t like he could take any of it back to return it. The best thing he could do was get over it.
“Well, that’s fine and well,” Mom Katherine said. “But your wife is the one who’s keeping things clean the other six days. Right, Alicia?”
“That’s right, Mom Katherine. You tell him.”
Phillip looked toward the television and acted as though he hadn’t heard any of what his mother had just said.
“So, son, when will you be preaching again?” Dad Phil asked.
“It’s hard to say. Sometimes I do the early-morning service even when Curtis is in town. It just depends on how busy he is and what else he has going on. Then, of course, like today, when he’s gone for the entire day, I normally preach the sermons for both services.”
“Well, you let us know when you’ll be doing it again because we’d love to come hear you.”
“I definitely will.”
Mom Katherine set her plate down on the coffee table. “We really did enjoy being here this weekend. It was nice to go to church today and nice to be here relaxing with both of you.”
Alicia stood up and grabbed her in-laws’ dishes as well as her own. “Is there anything I can get for either of you from the kitchen?”
“No, I couldn’t eat or drink another thing,” Mom Katherine said.
Dad Phil patted his stomach. “No, daughter, neither could I.”
Alicia loved when her father-in-law called her that and sometimes her mother-in-law called her that, too. They’d accepted her right from the beginning, and she’d liked them both immediately. She was glad she didn’t have to deal with a horrid mother-in-law because she had certainly heard stories from so many other women she knew.
When Alicia returned to the family room, she sat down on the sofa and curled her legs under her. “Phillip, did you want anything?”
“No.”
Phillip’s answer was short and curt, and he hadn’t even bothered looking at her. Maybe he was angrier than she’d thought, but what he didn’t know was that she was angry, too. Angry, irritated, and feeling like she was living with some prison warden.
Mom Katherine could obviously tell something was wrong. “Son, is everything okay with you? You’ve been so quiet since we got home, and you seem distant.”
“No, Mom, everything is fine.”
Phillip’s parents looked at each other, and Alicia could tell they knew different.
Alicia changed the subject. “So, Mom Katherine, in a couple of weeks, maybe I’ll drive over to the city so that you, my mom, and I can have lunch together.”
“I’d really like that. I haven’t seen your mom since you and Phillip got married, but the two of us had such a great time that whole weekend.”
“She talks about that, too.”
“You make sure you tell her I said hello.”
“I will.”
After another two hours passed, Phillip’s parents gathered their garment and overnight bags and Phillip helped his dad load everything into the car.
Mom Kathrine hugged Alicia and then Phillip. “Well, I guess it’s time to head back home.”
Dad Phil hugged them next. “Yeah, we’d better get going before it gets too late.”
Phillip stood with his arms folded. “You know I hate to see you go, but I understand.”
“You two take care of yourselves, and we’ll be talking to you,” Mom Katherine said, smiling.
Alicia smiled back. “You, too, and we love you both.”
“We love both of you, too.”
Alicia and Phillip stood in the front doorway, waving until his parents had left the driveway and were on their way down the street. Then, once they were back inside the house, Alicia shut the door and wasted no time giving Phillip a piece of her mind.
“What I want to know is why you were trying to make me look bad in front of your parents. Because I didn’t appreciate that little snide remark you made about the housekeeper one bit.”
“Look, Alicia. I’m tired, and all I want to do is enjoy the rest of my Sunday evening in peace. If you want to argue with someone, then by all means, please feel free to argue with yourself. But leave me out of it.”
Alicia followed him back into the family room. “Excuse me?”
Phillip sat down on the sofa and resumed watching the basketball game he’d sort of been watching while his parents were still there. But what pissed her off was that he acted as though she wasn’t even in the room with him. He acted as if she didn’t
even exist. But she was going to make him talk to her one way or the other.
“So, who was that tramp you introduced me to today?”
“What? What tramp?”
“You know exactly who I’m talking about, Phillip. That tramp Shandra.”
“Didn’t you hear her say we went to high school together?”
“Oh, I heard her loudly and clearly but with the way she was looking at you, I have a feeling that you were a lot more than just schoolmates. And I also saw how you were looking at her, too.”
“You’re making something out of nothing.”
“Am I now? So, you never dated her?”
Phillip didn’t say anything.
“Hello?”
“What?!”
“Did you or did you not date that woman?”
“Okay, fine. Yes, we dated but that was a long time ago. Years and years ago.”
“I knew she was more than just some acquaintance. I knew it as soon as I laid eyes on her and saw how she was acting around you.”
“We were practically kids, Alicia, so why are you harping on this?”
“I’m not. But I do think it’s just a little bit strange how she just sort of showed up out of the blue, even though she lives over in Chicago.”
“Alicia, people visit Deliverance all the time. And you know that.”
“Not women you used to date.”
“Well, it’s not like I can control who visits the church.”
“And what was all that garbage you were talking this morn
ing about marriage? You spent all that time explaining what it takes to have a good marriage, yet there you were, using your position in the pulpit as a way to try to get back at me, your own wife. You acted like you were speaking to the entire congregation, but you and I both know that you were talking directly to me. Then you had the nerve to talk about forgiveness, but at the same time, here you are walking around holding a grudge simply because I made a few charges on some credit cards.”
Phillip turned up the volume on the television.
Alicia stood there for a few seconds, wishing she had something she could throw at him, but gave up and went upstairs instead.
Entering the bedroom, she slammed the door and threw herself across the bed. Then she called her mother. But when she didn’t get an answer, she tried her cell phone.
“Hey, Alicia.”
“Hi, Mom. Where are you?”
“James and I are headed back from Wisconsin.”
“Oh yeah, that’s right. Did you have a good time?”
“We did and we were just saying how we’ll have to start going up there a lot more often than we do.”
“I’m glad you enjoyed yourselves. But, Mom, I really needed to hear your voice.”
“What’s wrong? Are you okay? Because you sound like something’s wrong.”
Alicia broke into tears.
“Alicia, honey, what is it?”
“It’s everything.”
“Honey, you have to try to calm down and tell me what you mean by that.”
Alicia sniffled a couple of times and took a deep breath. “Phillip and I aren’t getting along at all. And it’s getting worse
all the time. It’s getting so bad that I’m starting to think we never should have gotten married.”
“Oh, Alicia. What’s going on?”
“Well, for one thing, he’s still mad because I bought a new comforter set and some bathroom accessories for the guest bedroom, but Mom, who gets mad and stays mad over something that petty?”
“Well, you know how he feels about the money you spend, and that’s why I tried talking to you about that the other day.”
“But it’s not just that anymore, because today some ex-girlfriend of his showed up at the church, claiming she was visiting a friend of hers who’s a member.”
“How long ago did he date this woman?”
“Back in high school or so he says.”
“You don’t believe him?”
“It’s not so much that I don’t believe him. It’s more the fact that I think that woman showed up for a lot more reasons than Phillip is willing to acknowledge.”
“Like what?”
“I don’t know. Maybe she wants to sleep with him.”
“Did you talk to Phillip about this?”
“We just had a big argument about it a few minutes ago.”
“And what did he say?”
“That she was someone he knew from high school and that he can’t control who visits the church.”
“And he’s right. I mean, don’t get me wrong, who’s to say whether this woman has ulterior motives or not, but the bottom line is that if Phillip hasn’t been communicating with her since high school, then I don’t think you have anything to worry about. Plus, even if she does want to mess around with him, it’ll be up to Phillip to put her in her place.”
“But what if he doesn’t? Because even though I’ve never said this to you before, that was one of the reasons I was sort of hesitant about marrying Phillip.”
“Meaning?”
“Meaning, I didn’t want to end up hurt like you were. I’m only twenty-two years old, but for as long as I live, I’ll never forget all the women Dad had affairs with while he was married to you. And Mom, I’m telling you, I could never take that for as long as you did. I could never take it for even a few weeks.”
“I understand why you feel that way, and I don’t want to see you go through the same thing I went through, either. But at the same time, I really believe that Phillip loves you and that you should try talking to him again. Tell him how you feel about everything.”
“I don’t know…I’m tired of arguing with him.”
“Well, how mad was he about this comforter set you bought?”
“He’s real mad, and it’s so uncalled for.”
“Alicia, you really are going to have to stop blowing money the way you do. And you should apologize to Phillip. Because, honey, if you don’t stop soon, not only are you going to ruin your credit, but you’re going to cause your marriage to come to an end. And I know you don’t want that.”
Alicia didn’t like what her mother was trying to insinuate. “Ruin my credit? How am I going to do that when I pay all my bills on time and my credit is excellent?”
“If you continue down this path you’re riding on, it won’t stay that way.”
“I don’t see how, because my spending isn’t any worse than what it’s always been.”
“That might be true, but it was different when you were growing up and while you were in college because your father
paid all of your bills. But now that you have a husband, you have to make better choices and act a lot more responsibly.”
“Mom, why are you siding with Phillip?”
“I’m not siding with anyone. You’re my daughter and Phillip is a wonderful man who really loves you, and I just want to make sure you consider that. I want the best for you, Alicia, and more than anything I want to see you happy.”
“You know what? I have to go.”
“That’s fine, Alicia, but I hope you’ll think about what I said.”
“Yeah, right. I’ll think about it. Bye, Mom.”