The Battle for the Golden Egg (3 page)

wheezed Sensei Squirrel.

Kingyo-Sama stood up. He grinned, showing off his twisty teeth. ‘Mighty Fish will be our champion,' he declared.

BOOM!

A door slammed open at the far end of the hall. In strode a samurai the size of a whale.

The ninja gasped. The ninja gaped.

Mighty Fish was a monster. No-one could defeat him. They were doomed!

‘Ninja!' shrieked Sensei Squirrel. ‘Who will stand against this fearsome warrior?'

Buta-Sama stood up, yawned and farted. ‘Little Pig will be our champion,' he declared.

A teensy tiny ninja skipped into the room. Her nose was not much higher than her knees.

The samurai whooped and jeered.

But Little Pig grinned a secret grin. She knew something the samurai did not.

squawked Sensei Squirrel.

Mighty Fish lumbered into the battle ring. The floor groaned as he walked.

Little Pig stood opposite him. She only reached up to his shins.

‘This will be easy,' sneered Kingyo-Sama. ‘Mighty Fish will crush her like a puny prawn.'

‘Draw swords!' screeched Sensei Squirrel.

Mighty Fish drew a sword the size of a tree trunk.

Little Pig plucked a chopstick from her sleeve.

The samurai cackled and crowed.

‘Let battle commence!' shouted Sensei Squirrel.

With a roar that shook the mountain, Mighty Fish charged across the hall.

Little Pig didn't blink. She didn't move an inch.

Mighty Fish got closer. And closer. He raised his mighty sword. And just as he was about to slice her into sushi … he froze.

His eyelid flickered.

His face went pale.

His mouth opened in a great big ‘O'.

And then Mighty Fish began to scream.

It was a scream of terrible pain. He hopped from foot to foot, tugging at his clothing.

Little Pig smiled a secret smile. The plan was working. Mighty Fish always rested before battle. So she'd snuck into his room and spread hot wasabi in his undies.

Kingyo-Sama leapt to his feet. ‘What are you doing, you monkey's armpit?' he shrieked. ‘Squash her. Squish her. Mash her into mush!'

But Mighty Fish did not. He leapt and jiggled. He howled and wailed. He tore his ō-yoroi in two.

‘My bottom!' he squealed. ‘So hot! So very, very hot!'

Kingyo-Sama shook his fists. He stamped and stomped. He roared until his face went red. But nothing could be done.

Little Pig stepped forward. She drew her chopstick. She poked the jiggling giant on his great big, burny bum.

Mighy Fish howled. He jumped.

He clutched his raw behind. And then he raced to the window and leapt out into the night. Bare cheeks gleaming in the moonlight, he plunged into the icy depths of Lake Goowong.

Far …

far …

far …

below.

Little Pig skipped across the hall.

‘No!' shrieked Kingyo-Sama.

Little Pig lifted the Golden Egg.

The ninja whooped and cheered.

‘Ninjas win!' announced Sensei Squirrel.

His decision was final. The samurai had lost.