The Awakened (14 page)

“What? What is it?” I asked.

“Don’t ‘what’ me with that attitude,” he said. He led me away, enough from Ash that he could not eavesdrop. “I just wanted to talk to you. I wanted to see how you were doing.”

“I’m fine,” I said, automatically. “You don’t have to worry about me, Dad.”

He raised his eyebrow at me, looking so much like his old self that I nearly burst into tears. He was so young, only thirty-eight. He had only been twenty when I was born and the gray strands that were now in his hair worried me. “I always worry about you,” he said. “I just want to make sure you’re okay, as okay as anyone could possibly be. This isn’t easy.”

I shook my head. “I’m fine. I’ll be fine.”

“I know you’re not thrilled with us heading to your mom’s. And I know you’re not thrilled with Ash coming along.”

I nudged him in the shoulder. “She is my mom after all. It’s just…that’s rough too.” I looked up at him. “I’d imagine it’s worse for you.”

He shrugged, but I could see the pain in his eyes. Despite them being separated and divorced for so long, I could see that my dad never really got over my mom. “It’s for your survival, Zoey. We’ll handle it as it comes.”

“Exactly,” I said. “We’ll be fine.”

“And Ash?” he asked, looking over my shoulder.

I looked back at Ash, who was standing legs shoulder width apart, aiming for the bottles. My heart slammed in my chest, and I sighed. “It’s not like I wanted him to die, Dad,” I retorted. “It’s just not easy to have your high school bully along with you, every moment of the day.”

His mouth quirked up a bit, and I resisted the urge to smile as well. He knew me better than anyone. “I’ve been meaning to talk to you…”

“About what?” I asked, wiping my sweaty hands all over my jeans. I would have to change when I got back to the car. I felt disgusting and dirty. I ran a hand through my hair and winced at how greasy and stringy it had gotten over the past few days.

He took a deep breath and blew it out, looking embarrassed for a moment. “I wanted to apologize.” I looked up from my thorough examination of my hair and narrowed my eyes at him. “You’re right. I’ve always treated Ash better than I should have.”

“Dad, it’s not that important,” I started to say, but he was already shaking his head.

“No, you were right. Ash was a bully, and I knew that he had sent you home crying, but I just liked the kid. I always thought he had a crush on you and couldn’t quite figure out what to do about it. But that was no excuse. I should have been behind my daughter.”

“It’s okay,” I said, secretly jumping for joy on the inside. Finally, after nine years, my dad was seeing. He was admitting. It shouldn’t have been that important now, but it was. My dad’s obvious affection for Ash despite his treatment of me had always bothered me.

“Thank you. It’s not, but thank you. I should have never taken Ash’s side when you guys were fighting. I should have taken you more seriously. I know you think I always wanted a boy, but really I just wanted you, Zoey. You’re the best kid a parent could ask for.”

“Aw, Dad,” I said teasing him, trying to hide the emotions that were building up in the back of my throat. “Come on, there’s no other person that I’d rather be with at the end of the world.”

“Well, I’m going to take care of you,” he promised, sliding his hands into his pockets. He nodded toward Ash. “I know he’s been rough on you, but give him a chance. He’s changed. The virus, the Awakened, it’s changed him. And I’ve always thought he liked you.”

I dropped my gaze to the ground. “Ash doesn’t like me,” I insisted, but I didn’t feel so sure of that anymore. I sighed dramatically. “But I guess if we have to repopulate the earth together, there could be worse candidates.”

He groaned, but there was laughter in it. I grinned. “Please, really? Don’t talk about that kind of stuff with your old man. It’s weird.”

I laughed, and Ash glanced over at us, his eyebrows raised.

“Come on; let’s get out of here,” he said, grabbing my head with his arm in a headlock. “I love you, champ.”

“I love you too, Dad.”

IT WAS A DIFFERENT DREAM
this time. I was in the brownstone, trapped in my bedroom. Bandit was at the door whining, begging to be let out. I could hear the whispers of the Awakened in the streets. I was wrapped in the blankets on my bed, in the fetal position. Bandit’s paws kept scratching at the door, and the whining grew loud and louder. I clapped my hands over my ears and whimpered. “No, Bandit. No.”

He barked loudly, and I jumped at the sound. A moment later, there was a loud pounding on my bedroom door, shaking it in its frame. The doorknob rattled, but it was locked. I didn’t remember locking it, and I remembered it was because my bedroom had never had a lock on the door. Bandit pranced nervously in place, barking at the door.

“Bandit,” I whispered, fear shooting through my veins like ice. “Bandit, come here.”

He ignored me, his ears perked up, alert and ready. He crouched lower, his haunches up, as he growled at whatever was on the other side of the door. He was always the most protective dog. The door continued to rattle, and I knew it was only moments before it was ripped from its hinges.

It went flying, smacking into Bandit. He whimpered but held his ground. He went sprinting to the three Awakened that had burst in the room. The first one grabbed Bandit like he weighed nothing and tossed him across the room. My dog’s body went slamming into the solid wall and fell to the floor with a thump. I screamed and screamed and screamed.

The three Awakened turned to me, and I realized with a jolt that they were the three I had killed in the woods. I scrambled backward, my back hitting my headboard with a smack. There was nowhere to go. There was one on each side of the bed, and the girl Cara at the foot.

“She smells so good,” she said, her hoarse voice only a whisper, echoing through the room. “She’s going to taste so good.”

They came closer, pressing themselves against me, tearing away my clothes to sink into flesh. I screamed and screamed, but there was no one left. There was nobody left to hear my screams.

I woke with a start, sweat dripping down my brow. I realized that there were arms wrapped around me and recognized them as my dad’s. I burrowed my face in his chest, inhaling his familiar scent. His arms tightened around me. I raised my head a little and saw Ash in the front seat. Our eyes met in the rearview mirror, and I nodded to the question in his eyes. I was fine. I would be fine. Eventually I would stop having nightmares like a five-year-old.

I sat up, rubbing my forehead, and yawned. I motioned my dad to keep sleeping, and he slid back into sleep in seconds. I stretched, feeling cramps throughout my sore and tired body. I felt a pain in my abdominal area and frowned. It came again, worse than the last and I felt a swell of recognition rush through me. I paused, wondering if I could possibly be right, and started counting days. I frowned again. I just couldn’t remember. Another wave of pain passed through me, and I nearly cried in frustration. This had to be the worst timing ever.

“Dad,” I whispered, nudging him. He shifted a bit, but didn’t wake. “Dad?”

He stirred and looked up at me, with sleep filled eyes. “What’s wrong, champ?”

“Um,” I started, looking up at the front seat of the car and hoping that Ash couldn’t hear me. “You wouldn’t happen to have any, um, female necessities with you? Like, you didn’t grab any when preparing for this?”

He stared at me confused for a moment, and then it dawned on him. “Shit. No. I didn’t think. I just didn’t even think of it. You didn’t grab anything before we left?”

I shook my head. “I wasn’t exactly thinking of,” I lowered my voice for a moment, “
tampons
when I was packing.”

“Shit,” he repeated. He sat, and peeked over the front seat. “Where are we, Ash?”

“Not too far from Iowa,” he answered, quickly. “Maybe an hour or so.”

Dad nodded. “All right. We need to make a pit stop.”

Ash looked startled. “Why? Don’t we have everything we need? We’ve only got about nine hours left.”

We were getting so close. I couldn’t wait nine hours though. I needed something. I wondered for an instant whether the Awakened could smell blood, like a shark or something, and had to bite down a frenzied laugh. “I can’t wait. We need to stop.”

Ash looked back at me confused before turning his attention back on the road. Thankfully he didn’t ask. “There was a sign for a gas station about five miles back. It should be coming up soon. Will that work?”

I nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, that should work.” My cheeks were flaming red. Who knew that such a trivial thing like a period would become such a hassle?

The gas station came up quickly, and Ash took the exit. It was lit up, and there were a few cars parked at the pumps pumping gas as if it were any normal day. I couldn’t even remember what day of the week it was. Tuesday? I had lost track completely and my phone had died ages ago, taking my only source of calendar away from me.

I reached for the door handle as soon as we pulled in, but Dad grabbed my arm and pulled me back.

“Give me your guns, both of you,” he said, holding his hands out for them. “Keep your knives, but hidden, tucked in your boots.” We both handed over our guns. My dad dug into his pockets and pulled a rumpled twenty-dollar bill from his wallet. “Go on in, together. Act natural, get what you need, and get out.”

“And you?” I asked, shoving the bill into the back pocket of my jeans.

“I’ll be out here, keeping an eye out,” he said. His eyes were darting around the gas station, anxious. “It looks normal out there, but I don’t know what’s normal anymore.”

I looked up at Ash, who was looking determined. “Let’s do this.” We both got out of the car and started walking to the mart. My eyes were darting around at the other people but I had to look casual. I couldn’t believe that there was a gas station here, in the middle of nowhere, still operating. I had felt in the past few days that we were the only people left in the universe. It had felt like the world had gone silent.

Ash reached the door first and held it open for me. I walked in, glancing at the man behind the counter. He was reading a magazine and barely gave us a passing look as we walked in. “What are we here for?” Ash hissed at me as I walked through the aisles.

I burned with embarrassment. Having a period is a natural thing, I reminded myself, and it doesn’t stop for anything, even when a third of the population is suddenly bloodthirsty. I didn’t answer him and instead found a box of tampons on the bottom shelf, underneath the Nyquil and Tylenol. I grabbed it, and ignored the amused look on Ash’s face. “Shut up.” My fingers hovered over a box of Midol, and I reached for it. Ibuprofen was not going to be enough for this situation.

“Hey, I didn’t say anything,” he said, quiet laughter in his voice as we walked up the counter. I put both packages in front of the man, who rang them up, not bothering to say anything to the pair of us. I slid the dirty twenty across the slick surface of the counter and took back my change with shaking hands.

As soon as we walked around the mart, I stopped. Ash noticed that I was no longer at his side and turned around to look at me questioningly.

“I have to use the restroom,” I said, trying to put an easy smile on my face.

He nodded. “Okay, I’ll wait for you.”

I went around the side of the building and found the bathroom. It was dingy, dimly lit and extremely dirty. I made a face, wrinkling my nose before remembering that it was the first bathroom that I had seen in days. The novelty of “real” camping and peeing in the woods had lost its appeal almost instantaneously. I peeled my jeans off slowly, folded them and placed them on top of the paper towel dispenser. I removed my underwear, and tossed it in the trash; it was a completely useless pair now. I took care of business quickly and efficiently, as if it were any other day and any other normal period.

I sat down on the toilet after lowering the lid and cradled my head in my hands. I allowed myself to cry for about 30 seconds. They were quiet, desperate sobs. I couldn’t distinguish whether they were real or if my hormones heightened my emotions. It felt stupid to be crying now, but I couldn’t hold them back. I was struggling to hold it together, to keep myself together.

I had never even been camping. I had always lived a cozy, cushy life in my solo brownstone in New York City. Now I was dirty, disgusting, so hungry, tired and now I was on my period. I didn’t know anyone else who would understand that this little extra bit was just the cherry on top of the worst sundae ever. My dad and Ash were tired, hungry and dirty like me, but they didn’t have this. They wouldn’t even have to think of something like, and for the moment, I sort of hated them for that.

I cleared my throat and calmed myself down. I used some scratchy toilet paper to wipe the tears from my cheeks. I took a couple deep breaths, washed my hands, ignoring my reflection in the foggy mirror, and left the restroom.

“Are you okay?” Ash asked, falling into step with me. “You were in there for a while.”

“I’m fine,” I said. “How do you know how long it takes?”

Ash grinned a little. “Don’t tell me you’re going to get all snippy at me now.”

“Oh shut up,” I said, feeling relaxed for a moment.

“I’m going to take that as a yes,” Ash laughed. “Great. Now I don’t have to just worry about an Awakened biting my head off.”

I laughed, surprised at the sound. It had felt like years since I had laughed, genuinely. “Be careful, Ash. I might find you kind of tasty.” I opened the passenger door of the car, noticing that my dad had moved back into the driver’s seat.

He winked at me as I climbed into the backseat. “I always knew you wanted a taste of this.”

My dad looked back and forth between us. “I really don’t even want to know.”

I buckled my seat belt and snuggled into my seat. “Let’s go. We’ve only got eight hours until we reach Mom’s house. We’re almost there.” I felt excited, for the first time, in such a long time, to see my mom and stay in a house with a bed and a shower.