The Anchor (26 page)

“Sister,” I answer.

“Asshole,” she replies. “How could you not call me and tell me you not only have a girlfriend, but she’s pregnant, too?”

“Shit,” I mumble as I run a hand down my tired face. “I’ve been really busy, Maddie.”

“Don’t give me that. I’m your sister!”

“Look, I’m sorry. But I’m at work and I’m super swamped right now. Can I call you later?”

“Yeah. I guess. But you better call me or I’ll hunt you down and kick your ass.”

“Wouldn’t want that,” I jest. “I’ll talk to you later. Love you.”

Before she has a chance to respond, I start to hit the end button. Just as I’m pressing it, I hear her say, “Parker! Have you heard from—” And the line is dead.

I’m not going to lie. The last weekend Parker and I spent together started off perfect and ended pretty shitty. I feel like I’m split in two right now. There’s a part of me that wants to push him away, protect myself from what I’ve always told myself would happen if I ever fell for a guy, but then there’s the other part. That part that loves the way Parker makes me feel. The way he always needs to touch me whether we’re riding in the car or sitting at the dinner table. And I love how even though I’m more scared than I’ve ever been in my entire life, he somehow grounds me and keeps me steady. Just like he promised.

Since he gave his notice at his current job, he’s been busy with tons of work, and when he hasn’t been working, he’s been exhausted. But tomorrow is his last day and Sunday he’ll be moving to Holly Springs. He thinks I’m flying in tomorrow, but I’ve decided to surprise him by flying in tonight. Well, we’ve all decided to surprise him. John and Edie are coming too.

By the time we get to the apartment, it’s already past six in the evening and Parker isn’t there. John still had his key from when he lived here with Parker months ago so we are able to get in and settle a little. Seven o’clock rolls around and there’s still no sign of him.

“Should I go get some dinner for everyone?” John asks from where he’s seated on the leather couch, thumbing at the screen of his phone.

“God, yes,” I groan. “I’m starving.”

“Chinese?” Edie suggests.

“That sounds amazing,” I agree. “I want beef lo mein and chicken fried rice.”

John laughs. “Anything else?”

“Oh . . . spring rolls,” I add. “For the baby, of course.”

“Of course.” John grins. “You ladies stay here. I’ll run out and grab it.” He hops up, grabs Edie, and bends her backwards as he kisses her passionately, then stands her up, smacks her ass, and leaves.

I can’t help giggling a little. “You guys crack me up.”

Edie’s blushing. It’s adorable. “Why don’t we start working on his closet?”

“Sounds good.” Grabbing one of the cardboard boxes Parker must have gotten at some point, we tape it up and Edie starts packing his clothes while I go through the drawers. In his nightstand drawer, I find a photo of him with his arm wrapped around Maddie. I recognize her from the photos Adele showed me the night Parker introduced me to his parents. It’s not hard to see Parker adores her. I know he’ll be an excellent father. My heart sinks with the thought. I know he’ll be good, but I won’t. The truth is I’m not good enough for him or this baby. I don’t deserve them. I hate these feelings. I want so badly to just . . . be happy. Placing the photo on the bed, I push down the negative feelings. Everything is going to be okay. I will be happy.
We
will be happy. When I glance back to the drawer, I grimace. There are enough condoms to cover a whole crew of sailors that just arrived at port. Picking up a handful, I stare at them blankly, unsure if I should be bothered by him having these or not. I mean, they’re probably from before we got together officially, right?

“Good Lord,” Edie says, from behind me. When I look back at her, still holding the handful of condoms, she must read the millions of questions running through my mind from my facial expression.

“Those have to be from before you guys got together.”

“There’s like a hundred condoms in here,” I point out.

“Yeah. That’s a lot,” she surmises quietly. “But they’re from before you guys agreed to be together,” she reiterates.

Shaking off my insecurity and ever-present pessimism, I scurry into the bathroom and bring the trash bin back. “You’re right,” I agree, even though I’m not quite sure I do. Why wouldn’t he have gotten rid of these by now? And why does he have so many? Was he having that much sex before we got together? I decide to keep my mouth shut, attempting to avoid one of Edie’s lectures on my asinine amounts of negativity. Edie helps me scoop out the taunting prophylactics and toss them. Then she takes the bin back to the bathroom.

“Now that that’s done, get your ass in the closet and help me,” Edie orders. “I have no idea how to pack suits.”

“Hey,” I laugh. “Watch your fucking mouth when you’re talking to me.”

Edie giggles and drags me to the closet. We talk about her wedding plans, what we’re going to do about Dierk and keeping our guys from murdering him, and eventually, baby names.

“You don’t have even one name you’ve thought about?” she asks in disbelief.

I avoid meeting her eyes as I roll up one of Parker’s ties. “Not yet,” I admit. “Parker hasn’t brought it up either you know.”

“You think he’ll want a junior?”

I smirk. “If it’s a boy, probably . . . cocky bastard.”

We’re still in Parker’s closet when we hear the front door open and my stomach instantly grumbles as the thought of Chinese food hits me. My second trimester has turned me into an eating machine. It’s all I want to do.

“John must be back,” Edie giggles.

“I’m going to dive face-first into that chicken fried rice,” I warn Edie as she reaches her hands down to help me up from the closet floor.

Chuckling, she says, “Go for it.”

I grunt—yes, grunt—as she pulls me to my feet. “Damn,” I huff. “If it’s this hard to stand now, what’s it going to be like at nine months?”

“Probably worse, but if I can handle horses, I think I can handle you at nine months pregnant.”

“Aww. You’re the bestest friend ever,” I say.

“Yeah, that’s not even a word, but I know,” she giggles.

“Shut up and take the compliment,” I laugh.

She loops her arm with mine and we head toward the kitchen. We’re just about to exit the bedroom when we hear two male voices. One is definitely Parker’s, but the other I don’t recognize.

I am so glad tomorrow is my last day. It’s nearly eight and I’m finally heading home. I walk slowly, taking my sweet-ass time, enjoying what might be my last stroll down the streets of New York for a while. I’ll miss the atmosphere, the bright lights, and the way the city never seems to rest. In a way, it’s a lot like me.

As I step into the elevator in my apartment building, I make plans to take a hot shower, because frankly, I’m exhausted, call Nikki, then try my damnedest to get some sleep. Although I know I probably won’t. Not until I’m near her. Only then can I sleep. I’m sagged against the wall of the elevator as the doors slide closed, but an arm flies out, stopping them. Lifting my gaze, I find Uncle Paul watching me with an angry stare as he steps on. Immediately, I stand straighter. I haven’t spoken to him in weeks and I’m sure by now he’s heard about me quitting the firm.

The doors slide closed as Paul slips his hands in his pockets, his mouth twisted and brows furrowed as if he’s trying to rein in his anger before he speaks.

“Paul.” I nod my head in greeting.

Now he’s blinking rapidly; condescendingly. “Heard you’re making some changes in your life.”

“You heard right,” I reply, leaning against the wall again and crossing one leg over the other. He’s pissed. I knew he would be. But I’m a man. I don’t have to ask permission to make decisions in my life. “I tried to email you.”

The elevator dings, indicating we’ve reached our floor and the doors slide open. I follow Paul out and down the hall. “Do you know how many strings I had to pull to get you in over there?” he begins, his tone steady but laced with frustration.

“I’m sorry, Paul. I appreciate what you did for me, but . . . I need to move back to North Carolina.” I unlock the door to the apartment and open it.

“For what?” he seethes as he pushes by me.

There’s no way to break the news to him gently. He’ll be pissed no matter how I put it so I just come out with it. “Because I’m going to be a father.”

His hands are on his hips as he turns to me, his eyes squinting as if he didn’t hear me right. “What?”

“Don’t be like that, man. You heard me, Paul,” I counter as I loosen my tie. “I’m going to be a father.”

His expression goes slack in disgusted disbelief. “Is this a joke?”

“No. It’s not. I wouldn’t joke about something like this.”

“Wow. Like father like son,” Paul mumbles as he shakes his head.

“What the fuck does that mean, Uncle Paul? If you’re implying that my father did the honorable thing by staying by my mother’s side and now I’m doing the same, then yes. I’m just like my father and fucking proud of it.”

“You know he didn’t love her, Parker. I know she’s your mother, but he did what he thought was right, but really, all he did was deny himself, you, and Maddie the life you deserved. Your mother was beneath him.”

“Paul,” I growl through clenched teeth, on the verge of losing my cool. “Don’t talk about my mother again,” I warn.

Paul is a wise man. He drops it and moves on. “Jesus, Parker. Is it the woman I found in your bed? What was her name? Cary?”

“Karissa. And no, it’s not her. It’s someone else.”

“Someone else?” He laughs haughtily. “How many women have you been fucking, Parker?”

“If I want to fuck all of the women in New York, it’s none of your business, Paul!”

“Well, I’d say you’re close to doing just that!” he shouts. “How could you be so stupid to get some nobody girl knocked up?”

My anger is boiling through me with each beat of my heart. If he met Nikki, maybe he’d see she’s not like the other women I’ve been with. But he’s angry now and I just want this argument to end. “Paul. Enough. I quit. I’m moving home and I’m making a go of it with the baby’s mother. End of story.”