The Academy - Friends vs. Family (43 page)

He frowned at me, turning back toward the bedroom. “You can’t keep
her in the closet. Her school called me saying she missed some important tests
and when they tried to call, they said you said she moved.”

“She is moving,” my mother spat at him. “You’re taking her.”

My father reeled his head back. “No. I’m not.”

The silence that fell after sliced through me like a thousand
paper cuts in my skin. My mother wanted to get rid of me, and my father didn’t
want me.

“You’re going to take her back, or I will call the police.”

“Do it,” he said. “Do it and I’ll tell them you’ve got her locked
in the closet. I’ll tell them why there’s scars on her wrists. I’ll tell them about
how many times I’ve watched you put her on her knees...”

“I think they’d be more interested in how you raped her mother.”

My head popped up, my eyes locking with Gabriel’s.

My father closed the door on me. “Don’t you ever say that.”

Gabriel slid down to his knees, collecting me until I was standing
next to him. He half held me up off the floor, ready to take me. I was ready to
tell him to go. I wanted him to run. I’d go with him now. I’d do anything he
asked. I didn’t want to know any more.

“She was sixteen!” My mother howled at my father. “And she killed
herself after she had that girl in the closet. You tell me how it happened. It
doesn’t sound like she was happy with it.”

“Is this why you wanted me back here? To throw it in my face?”

“You bring that girl into my house, swearing she was your sister’s
and I believed you. I can’t believe how stupid I was. I can’t believe you had
me lie to the doctor about how it was a surprise home birth.”

“Stop it,” my father shouted, his voice booming. It was the
loudest I’d ever heard him. “I came back. What do you want?”

“I want you to take that girl out of my house. You left money for
us, I get that. You’re leaving me, go. I don’t care. But I’m not going to have
her here for another minute.”

“She’s going to stay here,” my father said. “Give me until the end
of the school year. By then I’ll have enough...”

“She’s sleeping around with boys in the neighborhood. She’s
getting them to pay for cell phones for her. I found boy clothes in her closet.
Marie said she’s sitting with a group of them at school. I won’t have her here.
You’re not going to leave me with this mess, your mess. She’ll end up pregnant
and the police will be here after her any way. I can’t look at her face any more,
knowing that’s what
she
looked like. The whore you slept with. She’s a
little whore like her.”

Gabriel growled low in my ear, gripping me to him.

“I’ve left enough money for all of you,” my father said. “You
don’t have to do anything. Just let her go to school. After that, you won’t see
her again. It’s only few months.”

“I...” my mom shouted, but faltered. She cried out. There was a
thud. She started screaming.

“Don’t you give me that,” my father shouted at her. “If you’re
faking it, I swear...”

Her screams filled my senses, drowning out everything else.
Gabriel slipped a palm to my ear, bringing my other ear to his chest. I wanted
to tear myself away from him to see what was going on but he held me strong
against him.

There was more thudding, more screaming. My father started talking
quickly, “Hello? Yes, we need an ambulance. My wife is sick.” He rattled off
the address, repeating himself.

The next few minutes became some of the longest and quickest at
the same time. Gabriel held me as the only mother I’d known screamed in pain.
My father tried to ask her what was wrong, tried to get her to take medicine
but despite this, her screaming continued. Gabriel refused to budge. He didn’t
want me to see what was happening.

The doorbell rang through the house. It startled me again, since
it was an alien sound. A thunder of knocking sounded at the door.

My father’s footsteps echoed through the house. Voices sounded.
The crash of a stretcher being brought in followed. Voices spoke. My mother
quieted.

Gabriel relaxed next to me when the footfalls disappeared down the
hall again.

“Let’s go,” he said.

He opened the door, peeking out. I followed behind him.

The bedroom was empty now.

Gabriel turned to me, tucking his shoulder into my stomach and
hoisted me onto his shoulder.

“Put me down,” I said, dangling off of his body. I patted my hands
against his waist and butt. “I can walk.”

“Fuck you,” he said. “I’m dragging you out before you think of
some other stupid reason to stay.”

Upside down, I was taken through the house. I recognized the path
to the side door of the garage. Gabriel stepped out. It was dim. The garage
light wasn’t on and the sun had just set.

Gabriel marched, carrying me across the garage and out into the
open, heading across the drive.

“Wait,” I called to him. “Put me down.”

“No,” he said.

“Sang,” my father’s voice shot through the air, “hey stop that.”

Gabriel ignored him.

“Gabriel,” I said. “Put me down.” I struggled, poking at his side.

He grunted, stopped, shifting me on his shoulder but moved forward.
Orders were given. Orders would be finished.

“Sang,” my father called out.

Gabriel stopped in mid-step.

I wriggled. “Let me see what he wants. I’ll tell him I’m leaving
with you. I’ll tell him so he won’t call the police or think you’ve kidnapped
me. I’ll go with you.”

Gabriel grunted but put me down. His hand found mine, his mouth
tight, his crystal eyes dark. He squared off his shoulders and turned with me
to look at what was happening.

An ambulance was parked in the road in front of the house. The
gurney was being hoisted into the back. The paramedics closed the back doors
and turned to my father.

My father was in the middle of the yard, staring after Gabriel and
I in the drive. “Wait just a second,” he said, appearing half conflicted with
wanting to address the paramedics or to talk to us.

I nodded to him. Gabriel squeezed my hand.

When my father seemed sure we would wait, he turned to address the
paramedics, saying he’d follow in his car shortly. The paramedic guys turned to
look right at my face as my father turned around to walk back toward us.

Mr. Blackbourne and Dr. Green.

The Academy was taking her. My father had no clue. Did they
intercept the call?

Where did they get an ambulance?

My father jogged across the yard toward us. “Sang,” he said,
stopping a few feet from us, shooting a questioning glance at Gabriel. “Who is
that? Is that your boyfriend?”

“Yeah,” Gabriel said before I had a chance to respond. “That lady
locked her in the closet all god damn day. Where the hell were you?”

My father reeled his head back. “I was at work.”

“You weren’t,” Gabriel barked at him. “We called and you weren’t
there. What the hell, dude? You don’t even want your own fucking daughter.”

“Gabriel,” I said, squeezing his hand, and pulling. “Don’t...”

“Do you know what she’s been through? And I know you do because
you just admitted it in there! You’ve seen her scars. And you’re walking out
and leaving her to that crazy woman? Did you want her to die? Fucking great. No
problem. Just let me take her and I’ll...”

“Wait,” my father said, taking a half step back. “Just wait.”

“For what?”

“Let her stay,” he begged. “Please.” I didn’t know whether the
sorrow in his eyes was genuine. I wasn’t familiar enough with him to know.

A shallow echoing, mimicking footsteps, approached. Two figures
jumped from the rail barrier of the front porch. Kota and Nathan. They’d been
in the house.

A cluster of footsteps sounded from up the street. A group of guys
were dashing down the road in our direction. I recognized North and Silas, with
Luke and Victor behind them.

My father took a step back as Kota and Nathan marched around him
toward me.

“What is this?” my father asked. “Who are they?”

“My family,” I said, the words slipping from my mouth. For a
moment I thought maybe that would seem insulting to him. The thought passed
quickly. I didn’t care what my father thought.

Kota reached me first, wrapping his arms around my waist and
picking me up off the ground, hugging me close. I let him take me. I couldn’t
resist any more. The others surrounded me, I could smell them. I could feel
their hands touching my back, my face, my hair.

“Wait,” my father pleaded again.

“She’s not staying,” Gabriel shouted. “Not another second.”

“Sang,” my father called to me. “Don’t leave Marie.”

The words stung me. I pulled back from Kota, meeting his concerned
face. The green of his eyes lost in the lack of true light.

“Put me down,” I asked him.

“No,” he said.

“Please.”

He grunted but lowered me until I was standing. The others parted,
giving me an unadulterated view of my father.

My father appeared defeated now. His shoulders slouched, like all
the times my mother yelled at him and he slinked off to do some laundry or go
to work to avoid it. “Sang,” he said. “I’m sorry. I know it was hard for you.
Will you please stay with Marie? I’m going to the hospital with your... with
her.” He swallowed. “Don’t leave your sister.”

“We’re not leaving Sang,” Kota said flatly to him, the command
overwhelming in his voice.

My father blinked, questioning with his eyes at the group around
me.

Determined faces stared back at him. Strangers to him. I felt as
if I knew them better than I’d known him. I’d lived with him all my life and he
was the stranger among us.

“I’ll stay,” I said. Kota and the others started to stir to life
but I spoke over them before they could tell me not to. “I’ll stay, but they
have to stay with me.”

“You can’t have boys in the house,” my father said.

“They stay or I go,” I said, my strength returning. “They stay or
I’ll tell the police what happened.” I had no idea what to tell the police and
knew I wouldn’t do it, but I wasn’t about to be told what was best for me now.
He was too late to rattle off parental rules to me.

His eyes narrowed on me. “Fine,” he said. “Just stay here until I
can get back.”

My lips glued back together, but I nodded.

He flicked his eyes once more to the others, eyeballing the seven
surrounding me. He jogged over to the car parked in the middle of the drive. He
got in, started it and drove away.

“Not a goodbye to either of them,” Nathan’s voice drifted to me.

A
N
ew
F
amily

Kota slept in my bed with me. The others were sprawled out on the
floor, with blankets and pillows strewn all over. I’d opened my eyes several
times during the night, warmed by the sight of them all.

Marie was in her room alone. She’d protested that we didn’t need
to stay, but I’d made a promise and I kept mine the best I could. I wouldn’t
let Marie sleep alone in the house, despite how she had participated. No one
deserved to be alone. Not tonight.

Sometime near dawn, the sound of metal striking metal stirred me
from sleep. Kota mumbled something next to me but sat up, rubbing at his eyes.
“What’s that?” he asked.

“I don’t know,” I said. “I’ll go check it out.” I tilted to the
edge of the bed, getting to my feet. When I stood, I swayed, shaking.

Kota stood, finding his glasses. “I’ll go.”

The others snuggled into the floor. North grunted, rolling onto
his back, yawning. “I’ll go.”

“It’s not the boogie man,” I said. I stepped over someone’s head,
tiptoeing over to the door.

The hallway was empty, as I expected, but oddly surreal to me. I
stumbled down the front stairs, with Kota behind me and North behind him.
Shadows. A wash of shivers swept through me. This would have never happened if
my mother was still in the house.

I checked my parents’ bedroom. It was in the same state it had
been the night before. No mother. No father.

I was still thinking of her as my mother. Habits were hard to
break, but every time I did it, the memory that she wasn’t renewed itself. I
didn’t have another name to call her, and I had no one to identify to replace
the name with. I hadn’t had time to process it all yet.

The banging noise continued. North pointed toward the back of the
house. We collected in the kitchen, moving together to the windows that
overlooked the back yard.

My father sat out in the yard, a large trampoline in front of him
in pieces. He was hammering the edges together.

“What the hell is he doing?” North said in mid-yawn, and scratched
at his chest.

“I’ll go talk to him,” I said. “Stay here.”

“Listen to her giving orders. Isn’t it cute?” North said.

Kota found my hand, squeezing it. “We’ll stay,” he said. “We’ll be
watching.”

“Like always,” I said.

I left them in the kitchen, padding over to the back door in the
back of the family room. I’d hardly used that door, but it led out to the
screened-in back porch. I don’t think I’d been inside the back porch since we’d
moved in. It was too easy to be spotted from the kitchen.

I gazed out into the yard, watching my father piece together the
trampoline. What was he thinking? What was he doing here? Shouldn’t he be at
the hospital? Or at work? He worked all the time. What was wrong?

I opened the screen door to let myself out into the yard. My bare
feet slicked over the dew covered grass. The air was thick with dawn scents, of
mowed grass and mugginess. The neighborhood was still. A weekday. People were
getting ready for work or school.

I trailed out to the center of the back yard, standing behind my
father as he worked. I watched, stepping into view so he knew I was there.

“I was at the super store last night getting groceries for the
house when I found this on sale. I always wanted one of these things,” my
father said, not looking back at me. “When I was your age… I shouldn’t say
that. You’re not that young any more. When I was a kid, I used to beg my
parents for one. They said it was dangerous. I’d crack my head on the metal.”
He was wearing the same dark slacks and the same polo he’d worn the night
before. His eyelids sagged. Was he up all night? “I meant to get one for you
two before now but never found the time.”

“How is she?” I asked. I felt annoyed. He made me stay the night.
He lied to me for years. Now he was deflecting. I was tired of being treated
like that.

He sighed, resting the hammer against his leg. “She’s still sick.”

“Cancer,” I said.

He gazed up at my face. “You knew?”

“I learned,” I said. “A couple days ago.”

His lips pursed. “Did she say so?”

“Nope.”

He turned back to the metal bars in his hand, started hammering.
“I was going to tell you, you know. I was going to explain it to you one day. I
thought when you were older...”

“I turn sixteen in a couple of weeks,” I told him. I folded my
arms over my chest. I felt horrible, like I was being rude. This wasn’t me. I
couldn’t stop. I didn’t know how to share any sympathy or how else to address
him. “How much older were you waiting for?”

He frowned. He started piecing together the frame for the
trampoline again.

He wouldn’t even look at me.

“Where do you go?” I asked. “You weren’t in Mexico.” I knew this.
I knew it was impossible he’d gone off that far and made it back in time last
night.

He picked up another piece and started putting it into place. “If
you must know, and you’d probably find out, but I’ve met someone else. Someone
who already has two kids and she wouldn’t understand… this.” He waved his hand
in the air toward the house.

My mouth hung open. “Are you kidding me?”

“Why do you think I’ve been working so much?” He dropped the
hammer on the mess of metal bars and stood up. He looked down at me. “And don’t
give me any grief. There’s seven boys upstairs in your room right now.”

How dare he? How could he look at me with those accusing eyes, as
if I was just like him? He had no idea. He’d never understand. I wasn’t going
to waste a moment explaining it to him. His opinion didn’t matter. “What do you
want from me?”

“I can’t stay,” he said. “Your mother hates me. She doesn’t want
me here. Her illness is bad. She’s getting not just treatment for the cancer but
they say she’s being seen by a psychologist today. It might be months before
she gets out.”

That thought lingered on me. She’d been in and out of the hospital
so much that it didn’t faze me at all to think of her in one. Now here it was.
She wouldn’t be back for a while. Was it because of Mr. Blackbourne and Dr.
Green taking her? I blinked at him, my mouth clamped shut, waiting for him to
get to the point.

“If you run off with that boyfriend, or those boys or whatever,
Marie’s going to be on her own. If your mother gets out, it’ll be tough on her.
I can’t be in twenty places at once.”

“You want me to stay here with Marie? You want me to stay in this
house?”

“I need you to look out for it. Take care of things while your
mother is gone. Make sure she has a place to get back to.” His eyes darkened.
“Please. I’m not asking for me. I’m asking for them.”

Somehow I doubted that. It felt like he wanted to be assured that
he could leave. Isn’t that what he did? He waited until he worked hard enough
to collect enough savings so he could run off without telling anyone. He didn’t
care. He just didn’t want to feel guilty. I sighed. “Is it true?”

His head tilted at me, an eyebrow lifted.

“Did you rape my real mother? Did she kill herself?”

He reeled back as if I’d struck him. “I didn’t rape her.”

“Who is she?”

His mouth tightened. “I loved her,” he said. “Please. Don’t.”

“You loved her? Did you love Marie’s mother? Is the woman in the
hospital her real mother?”

“Yes,” he said, his palm brushing against his face. “I mean yes,
she’s Marie’s real mother.”

I sucked in a breath. My hands closed into fists. I wanted to
pummel him. I knew how. I’d done it before. One chop to the neck and I’d send
him to the hospital like I’d did to one kid at school. “And you’re leaving her
for someone else? You’re leaving Marie behind? You’re leaving me behind? Just
so you can go off and pretend to be normal with another family?”

“Do you want me to stay?” he asked.

The question struck me. Did I? What kind of family did I end up
with? Was barraging him with questions going to bring me any closer to the
answers that I wanted, or give me what I needed? I didn’t know what I wanted at
all.

Or maybe I did. What I wanted were the seven people who had said
they wanted me. Seven boys. Plus Mr. Blackbourne and Dr. Green. Nine. I had
nine people in my family. Not him. Not my father.

“No, you don’t have to stay,” I said. “Marie might feel
differently though. Why don’t you go ask her?”

He frowned at me. “I have to go back to the hospital. I have to
sign papers. After that, I have to get to work.” He turned from me, starting
back toward the house.

“What do I do?” I asked, turning to him and following behind. “How
do I take care of this?”

“I’ll be back,” he said. “I’ll come back with groceries when you
need them and I’ll make sure the bills are paid. My phone number is in your
mother’s side table drawer. If you need anything, call me. I’ll bring it over.”
He stopped, turning to me. “Can you drive?”

“Not yet.”

“Find someone to teach you. Those boys drive, don’t they? If you
want lessons, I’ll pay for them. I’ll buy you a car. Teach your sister. When
you can do that, I’ll give you access to the accounts. You’ll need it.”

“You want us to fend for ourselves?”

“Get through this school year. Just for now. Stay out of trouble
and do well in school. You usually get straight As. If you can keep it up,
it’ll be fine.”

“Why?” I asked. “Why this school year? What happens when it’s
over?”

“I promised I’d take care of you,” he said solemnly. “I promised
your mother. I promised your real mother I’d look out for you. Let me do that.
When you’re eighteen, I’ll pay for college. I’ll do it if you let me. I can’t
ask you for anything else, I know. I don’t deserve it. Let me do this. I can’t
bring you two with me, but I can provide for you until you’re old enough. I
think you’re mature enough to handle this. I’m not far. I understand you don’t
want me here. I won’t be in your way. I promised, okay? I promised her.”

The blood drained from my face. “Who was she?”

He clamped his lips together again, turning away. He marched over
to the car parked in the drive. He was leaving us, with a half-finished
trampoline in the yard and questions left unanswered. Was it supposed to be a
peace offering? Was he trying to make some small connection, leaving a memory
that he wasn’t such a bad person? He got into the car, leaving the trampoline behind,
unfinished. Just like us. He was running away from a life he didn’t want,
toward a new family he had to lie to in order to keep.

I turned, spotting Kota and North inside the screened in porch.
They’d been watching over me. I didn’t want to think the next thought, but I
did, and it stuck to my mind like a spider web.

How long did I have before they left me, too?

The unwanted.